Revolting

Chapter Thirty-Firsts Heath

"Son of a bitch!" I blurted out, as I cut myself for the third time. I threw down the straight edge razor and used the edge of my t-shirt to stop the bleeding of the new knick I'd just cut in the edge of my jaw. "What the hell am I trying to do?" I growled at myself, holding up Hannah's broken mirror to glare at my half-shaved face.

Hannah gave me a motherly look. She's been doing that a lot lately, I thought. She picked the old-fashioned straight edge razor out of the dirt and cleaned it carefully, and then pulled the file out of my bag and began to sharpen it. "What you are doing is making yourself presentable for your first official date with your mate." She said with infuriating sensibility.

"My first ever date with anyone," I pointed out irritably.

"Exactly," she beamed at me, and then tested the edge of the razor against her palm. Satisfied that it was sharp enough, she came at me with the razor in one hand, and our dwindling bar of soap in the other. "Now hold still.".

You haven't known fear until you've given your baby sister a sharp razor, and let her scrape it across your throat. But in fact, her small hands maneuvered the blade expertly, and all I could hear were the sounds of my own breathing, and the scratchy sound of my bushy beard being stripped away. I couldn't remember the last time I'd taken the time to shave. It just wasn't practical or necessary when you lived in the woods. She stopped from time to time to lather on more soap, or use a cloth to wipe away the whiskers she'd already cut. Somehow, she managed to finish the job without drawing any more blood. "Hmmm," she made a satisfied noise in her throat as she handed me back the mirror.

I stared at my face, and hardly recognized myself. My chin seemed extra pale without the hair obscuring it, and when I reached up to touch it, my jaw felt strangely naked and baby soft. I looked much younger without the facial hair, and I wasn't sure I liked it, but Hannah was beaming in approval. "You look so handsome," she cooed, "William is going to fall over himself."

I felt my ears grow hot and red. Was it a bad thing that I wanted my mate to be impressed with my improved appearance? It felt weird, wanting to please someone other than myself. I haven't cared for anyone beyond Hannah, ever. Now I was suddenly aware of this other person all the time. I mean ALL. THE. TIME. Since he left to go back to his duties as the pack beta, my mind had not stopped chasing after him, and my treacherous heart was pining for him as though I were a baby being separated from its mother for the first time. He was all I could think about. His face, his smell, his smooth, hairless chest. His muscular thighs. The way it had felt to have his body pressed intimately against mine the whole night, and his hot hands splayed over my skin.

With embarrassment, I realized my manhood was making a tent out of my sweat pants, just from thinking about him. It was unreal to want someone this badly, all the time. Did he think of me that way too? Was he feeling any pain, being away from me? Was he anticipating our night together as anxiously as I was? Thankfully Hannah had already busied herself with something else, so she didn't notice my predicament. I rubbed at my weird-feeling chin again. I wish I had other clothes to wear, but aside from the set of sweats that Hannah had brought me from the pack, my clothes were nothing more than rags. I didn't want to embarrass William in public by showing up for our date looking like a homeless man. I looked down at my bare ankles and winced. Instead, I looked like an awkward teenager who had just had a growth spurt, so none of his clothes fit him. I'd never cared about clothes before, but next to William, I felt like a hobo. He always dressed so stylish, like he'd just stepped out of some men's magazine. I made myself shrug away my feelings of inadequacy. William could take it or leave it, this was all I had to offer.

"You're going to stay with Daisy tonight, right?" I asked her, for at least the third time. I didn't want to scare her, but I'd picked up some unfamiliar scents this morning when I went to answer the call of nature. They were werewolf, but they didn't belong to any of the Rebel Moon wolves who had been out to visit us in the past. I didn't want Hannah to stay in the camp alone.

"Yeah," Hannah smiled at me over her shoulder. "We are going to watch a movie and eat popcorn. She said we will have a 'girl's night'." Again, I was struck by how happy she looked. She was getting to do the things that normal girls do, like hang out with friends to watch movies. I was grudgingly glad that Daisy and the Rebel Moon pack were giving her the experiences that I had never been able to.

"Okay," I said, smoothing my hair back one last time. "Will you escort me to the pack house?" I stuck out my elbow like I'd seen men do on TV before. She grinned happily and looped her arm through mine, skipping beside me as we made our way through the trees. She must have felt my nervousness, because she squeezed my forearm reassuringly. "Don't worry, Heath. He's going to love you."

I swallowed a big old lump in my throat. Love? Why did that word make me start to sweat along my upper lip? My bare-naked upper lip. Suddenly I felt like I was being torn in two... The part of me that wanted to run toward the pack house, the part of me that was appalled that I'd already spent a whole day apart from my mate... and that other part, the part that wanted to drag my feet and walk as slowly as possible, as though I were walking to the gallows instead of to the home of my...

My what? I wiped my sweaty palms against my thighs. How could I be this nervous?

We emerged from the woods behind the pack house, just as the sun was starting to drop behind the mountains to the west. It didn't really look like a pack house, just a big old sprawling farm house, with peeling paint and black shutters. I started toward the back door, but Hannah tugged me in a different direction. "Front door, Heath. You need to pick up your date from the front door."

I swore, and she shot me a dirty look, but I allowed her to tug me around to the side of the house, and then out around the front. We went up on to the porch, which was sagging from age and wear, but thankfully still held our body weight. I took a deep, fortifying breath and raised my hand to knock. Before my knuckles found the door, it was pulled open by a grinning, blond-headed Daisy.

"Ohhh, welcome!" She cried, then she did the weirdest thing. She wrapped her arms around my waist and squeezed me like I was a close friend. I turned and gaped at Hannah in surprise, but she only smiled and shrugged and whispered, "Just go with it."

Right. Yes. Just go with it. That was going to be my motto for the evening. I straightened my shoulders and forced a smile at the little blond woman, who seemed to be as bouncy as her curly hair. "Come in and make yourself comfortable. I'll let William know you have arrived."

"No need," I heard his smooth sexy voice from the stairs. "I was watching for him." I looked up and saw him gliding down the stairs. The man really had unusual grace for a guy of his size. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a simple cotton t- shirt which molded to his finely sculpted chest. The sight of him, partnered with his smell wafting down the stairs had my mouth going dry, and my heart thumping painfully in my chest. He smiled at me, and then did a double take. "Oh my god, sasquatch! You shaved your beard!"

"Sasquatch? What? Really?" I didn't know whether to laugh or be offended, but when he put his hand against my face, I forgot to do either. His hands were hot, the sparks were flying, and the look in his eyes was making my thighs clench. I saw him lick his lips as his fingers trailed over my now-smooth jawline, just to slide around and cup the back of my neck. He was just a couple inches shorter than me, and he used the hand behind my neck to pull my head down to his, and press his lips against mine.

I felt my ears grow hot, and I had no idea what to do. I wasn't going to admit to him that this was my very first kiss. William was my first everything.