Reclaiming My Broken Luna (Astrid and Killian)

Astrid's POV

My eyes had been swollen red and puffy from endless crying. My grandmother was the only family member I had left. Now that she's dead, I am left all alone.

Since I'm the only one left, I am in charge of her medical expenses and I have been busy preparing for her funeral all alone.

I've never stopped crying since my grandmother died.

Still, I hated myself.

What's the purpose of preparing for her funeral and crying after she died when I wasn't even there by the time that she needed me the most?

In her last days, I wasn't even there to comfort her.

My precious grandmother doesn't deserve a granddaughter like me.

I held back my tears as I gathered my grandmother's favorite foods together and placed them near her casket.

In the happy memories that I had when I was little, I wasn't all alone. I always had my mom and grandma to rely on.

That didn't last long though, eventually, my mother died and my grandma had to shoulder all the responsibilities and raise me on her own.

Having only each other to rely on, my grandma and I became very close. She is the person closest to me, the person to whom I also owe my life.

I was pulled back from my thoughts when someone placed a hand on my shoulder. I thought it was Killian, but when I looked up I felt disappointed to see Drystan.

"Condolence," Drystan muttered under his breath as we locked gazes.

I just gave him a slight nod. My heart is too heavy to say anything.

I looked around to search for Killian. The guests are piling up already to share their condolences, but he's still nowhere to be found.

He is my mate, he should be the first one to comfort me after the person who raised me had just died. He knows that my grandmother was the only family member I have left. I needed his comfort the most. I have been waiting long enough for him to come, but he is nowhere to be found.

Drystan sat at the empty seat beside me which I left vacant for Killian because I was still hoping that he would come.

I know Killian doesn't love me and he only cares about Giselle, but I thought in the years that we've been together, he would at least feel concern for me especially since I was just bereaved of a loved one.

He is the reason why I wasn't able to see my grandma while she was alive. I thought he would come and at least apologize for that.

In the end, I was stupid for hoping that Killian would show care for me at all.

"Luna Astrid, should we start the funeral?" Someone came and whispered to me.

I swallowed hard. "There's no need to delay the funeral any longer. It's better to conduct the funeral while the people who truly cared are here." I answered in a soft whisper, but Drystan heard me because he was sitting beside me. Tears that I thought I had already used up sprang up again and streamed down my eyes as my grandmother's casket was slowly lowered into her burial place.

My shoulders shook and I heaved knowing that this would be the last time I would ever see my grandmother again.

"Here," Drystan whispered to me as he handed me his handkerchief. I took it willingly and used it to wipe my tears and snot away without feeling embarrassed because Drystan and I were close.

I stiffened a bit when Drystan suddenly caressed my back to comfort me, but eventually, I relaxed since he was my friend.

Wanting more of his comfort, I turned around and enveloped him in a hug. Right now, all I need is warmth. Thankfully, he didn't push me away. Instead, he hugged me back and continued to rub my back soothingly.

If Drystan wasn't here, I would have been a mess. Thanks to his hug and comfort, some of the pain in my heart had melted away.

Drystan never left me.

As I saw the guests away and received their condolences, Drystan just stood by my side, ready to give me comfort whenever I needed it.

The funeral was done and the guests had left. As I packed everything up, Drystan helped me without saying a word. His silence was like his comforting hug to me.

Just seeing him here helping me, I felt understood and I do not have to feel alone anymore.

"Thank you, Drystan," I muttered under my breath and gave him a small smile.

"It's nothing, Astrid." he pauses. "Everything will be okay. I'm sure time will heal you," he adds when he still sees sadness in my eyes.

I nodded my head slightly, accepting his advice.

"What happened to Killian?" He asks me.

He must have been dying to ask me that question, but he waited until I had turned emotionally stable.

I averted my gaze at him and continued to pack the excess things that I bought for my grandmother's funeral.

Drrystan doesn't know anything because I haven't told him anything yet. I'm not planning to tell him anything either.

I heard footsteps behind me as I felt a presence approaching me. I stopped what I was doing and turned around to see who the late visitor was only to find out that it was Killian. Killian looked like he ran in his wolf form to come all the way here. His hair is a mess, and his tie is not even tied properly. He was breathing so fast that he couldn't even speak.

My face turned blank as I locked gazes with him. The funeral was over, he didn't need to come. Annoyed with his presence, I stormed out of the place and left Drystan.

Killian chased after me with a bouquet of flowers in his hand.

"Astrid, I couldn't leave early because I had something I needed to take care of. It was something I couldn't get away from."

I stopped and turned on my heel to face him.

My fists balled up at my sides as I narrowed my eyes at him. "Was there anything else more important than to be on your mate's side at the time that she needed you the most?" I shot back at him. His eyes met mine and for a fleeting moment, a shadow of remorse flickered across his gaze

However, it wasn't enough to quench my anger.

"You know what, you do not even need to come here," I spoke bitterly. "If only you hadn't stopped me that night, I would have still met my grandma while she was still alive."

Killian's grip on the bouquet tightened when he heard my words.

"I had no idea I-"

"I kept telling you that my grandmother needed me!" I yelled, interrupting him from his words. "You never listened to me."

"All you cared about is Giselle who is pregnant with your child." I blurted out finally releasing all the emotions that I have buried down long enough.

Killian could not say a word. Whatever he says, and even if he apologizes, his words would never bring back my grandmother and it would never bring me back the time that I could have spent with her.

Killian was silent for a moment. My heart which has always been heavy, felt lighter than it was after I finally told him the things that I've been wanting to tell him.

I glanced at him in surprise when he suddenly crouched down and placed the bouquet of flowers that he brought on the ground where my grandmother had just been buried.

"I only came here to pay my respects to your grandmother. I'm sorry if I was late, that was out of my control," Killian replied like he didn't just hear the rest of the words that I said.

My breath turned shallow and my heart burned more in anger at his heartlessness. After everything that I said, that was it?

Unable to control myself anymore, I picked up the flowers and thrashed them on Killian until the flowers were all shredded into pieces.

Killian accepted all the hits that I had given him without saying anything.

"You are here to pay respect?!" I screamed at him. "Do you know how disrespected my grandmother would feel to see how much you had disrespected me?" I threw what was left of the flowers to the ground.

"I'm tired of this. If you can't give me respect, I should at least give myself some respect," I spoke in a weak voice as I collected myself together.

This wasn't a part of any of my plans, but right now I think that is the best decision I could ever make for myself.

"Let's just stop this joke and get a divorce," I spoke firmly, looking at Killian directly in his eyes.