Raw

Chapter 37

“Scotch please. Double and neat. I hand the bartender my card, and she swipes it quickly, then gives it back to me.

Cal orders the same, then pats me on the shoulder. “You’ve been quieter than usual. What’s up, man? Single life treating wrong!”

Single life sucks. Cal’s allergic to any kind of commitment besides work, so he wouldn’t get it. “I’m adjusting.”

“You need some**y.”

“I’m not disagreeing.” I say, more playful. The bartender brings our drinks, and she gazes at me, her eyes lingering on my mouth. With long dark hair and cat-like brown eyes, she’s the opposite of Ava. She has a sleeve of tattoos on one arm, and wears a bold purple lipstick. My c**k tightens against my pants, warning me it’s been asleep for too long. “I’m not ready, though. I look square into Cal’s eyes, to keep him from trying to convince me to join Tinder or some other weird s**t.

“Ready for what? This isn’t some blind date situation. Some distraction would do you good. Unless you’re thinking about going back to Ava.”

I take a longer sip of scotch, the bold liquid rushing down my throat and burning my chest. When I left my home, I meant to do it forever. I couldn’t keep a relationship just to treat her like c**p and make her feel bad about her mistake. And***t, knew I’d be that p**k. Ava didn’t deserve that-neither did L.

Ther

The last time we f***d, I called her names, and… while it was part of a game, a part of me, a dark side of me, enjoyed ever minute of it. How could I make love to my wife when I’d f**d h**er like an animal and cussed her out? And liked it. “I can’t go back.”

“Okay, so move on.”

I drink some more. How to erase years of memories overnight? Another question Cal wouldn’t know the first thing about. Screwing is his answer to everything. Other patrons walk in, and the bartender does a slick job helping them in a brisk pace! She glances my way every so often, her pretty eyes carrying a hidden message. A promise.

Blood rushes down to my **k, and I massage the back of my neck, uneasy. I should just pay and go..

“So I told Andrew he could give someone else the commission, Cal continues, gesturing with his hands, telling a story I should have been paying attention to. “Son of a **h.”

“What?”

Cal glances at his phone. “Andrew’s calling me. Okay. Gotta take this. Be right back. He slides off the stool and marches out of the bar, to the quiet area near the lobby.

I raise my tumbler to him, then take another sip. I look around me, and the place is getting packed. Two other bartenders have joined the other one, and are all working swiftly together to get everyone drinks.

“All alone?” says the bartender from earlier, her voice smooth.

I silently read her name tag. Marion.

“You could say so. I shrug. I’ve been alone for the somehow the loneliness stings deeper.

past few months-even while married. Still, now, without Ava around me,

She tilts her head to the side, and flashes me a s**y smile. I’m taking my break.” She removes her half apron and places it in drawer, then opens the door leading to the interior of the bar watch her, admiring her lithe form, the sway of her hips as