Primitive Instinct: The Journey Home

The weeks that followed as the moon grew darker were spent mostly inside.

The splint came off Roar’s leg and he walked short distances with only the crutch, making him grin widely every time he went outside, which was as often as he could get away with it.

Hool’gra’nat recovered and came over to thank me and agree to make the sleds for the Quasim, since they were the ones that had the herbs he needed. He also asked about the mixed clans at the mouth of the valley, and I think he was considering going with us when we left before the end of the snow cycle.

The entire time, Roar was busy learning everything he could about English and my life before coming here so he could understand me better. He really was smart and was learning it quickly. Some of it he was backwards on, like shoe-snows, but he was a fast learner.

Like most mornings since we came back from the clans near the mouth of the valley, I woke up with Roar holding me and smiled to myself before I started tracing the pattern in his fur with my fingers. It was a swirling, almost tribal design and it suited him, I think.

“That feels good,” he muttered into my neck after a while. “Paws don’t go into the fur well, but your fingers do. It feels very good.”

I scratched gently at his skin under the fur, and he growled as his whole body tensed slightly and goosebumps erupted on his skin. I giggled and turned his paw over to touch his pads and the little bit of claw that had slipped out.

“Now I understand why Diesel always looks like he melts when you do that,” he muttered, retracting his claws.

“I wasn’t done with those,” I pouted, and he chuckled before a small flex had them out again.

“Be careful, Fern. They’re very sharp,” he told me.

“I noticed,” I carefully pushed my finger on the end of a claw. “They’re longer than I thought they would be.”

“My paws are larger than most,” he answered. “My fingers are longer and wider, and my fur is longer, so I don’t need protection unless it’s very, very cold. Even my feet.”

“So, you don’t need to wear the boots?” I asked and he hummed. “So why do you, then?”

“Because everyone else does,” he answered. “Anything to not be different.”

“I love how different you are,” I said as he retracted his claws again and I put my fingers through his, locking our hands together. “Oh wow. They’re really warm. And your fur is so soft.”

“You know, telling a male that his fur is soft is not something a female would do until after the gifting, right?” he chuckled. “Typically, after they’ve mated.”

“I didn’t know that, but it’s true,” I answered and put his paw on my face so I could feel it there better. “I’ve always thought your fur was soft. I figured it would offend your male pride or whatever, so I never said anything. Guess it’s a good thing I didn’t.”

“There’s a few things that we’ve done that shouldn’t have happened yet,” he said, turning my head so he could kiss me sweetly. “None of which I will complain about.”

“The only complaint I have is that we don’t do these things nearly as often as I would like,” I said.

“I can walk again. In a few weeks, when you can no longer see, I’ll be able to hunt again. I’ll begin my gifting soon after that. There are still a few things I wish to find for you, since I can’t make them myself,” he said.

“I don’t need anything, Roar. Just you,” I told him.

“I still wish to,” he smiled before kissing me again, this time lingering until I had goosebumps.

A call from outside had me groaning and Roar growling as he flopped to his back and scrubbed his paw down his face in annoyance.

“It’s the chief,” he said and got up.

I huffed and got up, too, going to mess up my untouched bed before sitting on it and trying to pick knots from my hair as Roar went to answer the call.

“Chief,” I nodded in greeting when he came inside. He returned the gesture before looking at Roar.

“I’ve come to ask about your mating,” he said.

“I’ve only just started walking,” Roar said, lifting his eyebrow.

“And you should have been hunting as soon as you could,” the chief stated, and I narrowed my eyes at him.

“I have been cautioned by many healers not to,” Roar said stiffly. “I trust their opinions and value their thoughts more than my urge to be outside hunting.”

“You don’t have much time left, Roar’kaol’tok. If you are not mated soon, I’ll move forward with picking your mate,” the chief said.

“How soon is ‘soon’?” I asked, earning a glare from the chief.

“You should not speak in matters that don’t concern you,” he said.

“Roar’kaol’tok is my family. His happiness concerns me nearly as much as the blatant hostility your clan has shown me. Tell me, chief, what was done about the young ones trying to harm my family?” I asked him pointedly and gestured to Diesel. “And I need not remind you what happened to the last pathetic creature that thought to hurt him and get away with it.”

The chief’s eyes darted to the orou skin before his jaw tensed. He looked away sharply, turning his attention back to Roar.

“You have until the dark of the moon to be mated and joined,” he snapped and left the tent in a huff.

“That was very foolish, Fern,” Roar said gently.

“He’s trying to get me alone, so the clan has a better chance of hurting me,” I stated, and he frowned.

“I feel that as well,” he said after a second. “It might be wise if I go with you when you leave for your hunting.”

“Your leg is still weak from being broken,” I shook my head.

“I will do little more than what I do already,” he promised as he grabbed his bow and unwound the string from being stored. “I would feel better if I was with you, though.”

“You’re not giving me a choice, are you?” I asked and he silently strung his bow. “I don’t want you to get hurt again, Roar. It nearly scared me to death this time. I can’t do it again so soon.”

“Come here,” he sighed and laid his bow on the bed beside him. I went to him and he pulled me close to stand between his legs. With him sitting, we were closer to the same height and he looked at me deeply, his golden eyes focused sharply on me. “I will be right beside you, Fern. Not one step away. I won’t do anything that might hurt my leg because you won’t let me. I promise, I’ll be careful.”

He put his paws on my face and put our foreheads together for a moment before he kissed me tenderly, promising everything he had said and more.

“I don’t like seeing you upset,” he said, pecking my lips. “It bothers me deeply.”

He kissed my cheek before pulling me closer still, so I was forced to straddle his lap.

“I heard you scream when I fell and it haunts me,” he kissed my lips again. “I will do anything to keep from hearing that much fear in your voice again.”

I sighed and put my arms around his neck, leaning into him and his kisses. He held me close with a paw on my lower back and the other at the back of my head, controlling and directing the connection between in every way. My heart soared as my body burned with the pleasurable sensations, letting out a soft moan that made Roar growl.

“This is not proper,” he commented.

It didn’t stop him from turning us so I was laying on the bed under him while he kept kissing me deep enough to feel like my soul was being filled. I needed him to keep going and never stop. I pulled at the ties of his shirt until it fell open, giving me complete freedom to touch him like I’ve secretly wanted to for a while now.

“Fern,” he rumbled softly before his lips found my neck, trailing kisses from one side to the other as he made very short work of the ties on my shirt. His paw touched my stomach and he growled lowly as he brought it up and around to frame my rib cage. “I’ve dreamed of this for a long time.”

“Oh God,” I whispered, my eyes pinching shut as the sensation of his warm pads and soft fur contrasted greatly with the feeling of his chest hair rubbing on my suddenly very sensitive nipples.

“Shh,” he said, kissing me. “We shouldn’t be doing this, but I don’t want to stop just yet. If anyone hears, things will get complicated for both of us.”

“Please, don’t stop, Roar,” I whispered. “Don’t stop.”

“Never,” he told me, pecking my lips before groaning softly and driving his hips forward against me and I whimpered. “Shh.”

He grabbed my thigh and lifted my leg to his hip as he rolled his hips forward again, making my eyes roll backwards as the friction and feeling of him holding me overwhelmed me. Another thrust and my body started shaking as he peppered kisses all over my face and reminding me to be quiet. One more and I was gone. Over the edge and climaxing as he put his mouth over mine to keep me quiet.

I rode higher and harder on another thrust, and I felt Roar’s body tense and a growl rumbling in his chest. The final thrust had him strangling his own moan as I kept our mouths connected, taking the sound from him as he took mine, rocking slightly against each other as he rode through his own orgasm. When he stilled, he sagged slightly, holding himself up on his elbows while we both breathed quickly.

“I can’t wait until I have all of the gifts for you, Fern,” he said in my ear after a moment. “I don’t wish to deprive you, but I can’t wait that long.”

“Then don’t,” I told him, wrapping my arms around him under his shirt still. “You’re all I need, Roar. You make me happy without even trying.”

“As much as I would prefer staying here, we need to go soon,” he sighed and then groaned. “But I need to change first.”

“And I do not need to be in here when you do,” I sighed as he got up. “I have no confidence in myself to let you change without... assistance.”

“Hm. Best not to push, then,” he smirked at me, then frowned at the flap of the tent. “Stay very close, Fern. I want to hear if something happens.”

“As if I’d go anywhere without you,” I rolled my eyes as he helped me up and closed my shirt for me, tying the strings deftly.

“Not if I can help it. I’ll start my gifting tomorrow morning. The first must be done in front of the chief’s tent, so he and the clan can know,” he kissed my forehead before taking my face in his paws and kissing my lips deeply. “I will not make it very meaningful, because I want to be the only one that sees your happiness. The rest can be done here, alone, in the days to come.”

“How long does this last?” I pouted and he chuckled.

“Until seven gifts are accepted or I have given them all to you,” he answered.

“Can you not give them all to me at once?” I grumbled and he laughed before kissing the end of my nose again.

“Only one every day, so you may reflect on my capabilities to make a suitable mate,” he answered then put a finger on my lips to keep from speaking. “And I know your thoughts on this already. But it’s how it’s done.”

“Fine. I’ll... try to be patient,” I pouted. “I’ll be outside.”

“And I won’t be long in here,” he nodded, letting me go.