Pregnant

Chapter 27

Nathan

Late one Friday evening, after another long day of reviewing estate financial reports until my vision blurred, I stumbled toward the kitchen, desperate for strong coffee. My supernaturally keen hearing picked up Terra’s distinctive laughter echoing from within.

I hesitated, not trusting my restraint around her unpredictable moods presently. But caffeine called my name. I braced myself and pushed through the door.

Terra sat casually at the marble counter scrolling her phone, cheeks still flushed from whatever had amused her. She quickly smoothed her features at my entrance. I attempted civility. “Burning the midnight oil, I see? Can I get you a coffee!”

She shook her head, already edging toward the other doorway. No need, I was just heading up.”

I felt my diplomatic smile crack around the edges. “Wait. Please. It came out inore harshly than intended, making Terra pause warily. I took a slow breath. “My apologies. It’s only well, we’ve hardly spoken in days. I want to know you’re alright.”

Terra’s expression remained detached, but her voice softened fractionally. I’m fine, Alpha. Just been busy.”

I seized on the subtle thaw. “Yes, I imagine so. How are preparations coming for the Harvest Festival?” I knew Terra had loved the colourful autumn celebration as a child. Perhaps reminiscing would break through this endless frost between us.

But in my words, her face shut again completely. “Everything is handled. If you’ll excuse me, I need to finish packing

She turned on her heel before I could respond. Packing? “Wait, you’re leaving?” I hated the plaintive note that crept into my question.

Terra glanced back, impatience in her eyes. Tve stayed overlong already. My work here is done now that your father is well. I’m sure you have capable physicians on hand to take over his ongoing care.”

“But I thought I floundered uncharacteristically, blindsided by this abrupt announcement. We had just begun. establishing a tentative rapport. How could she depart so soon?

Terra’s sharp gaze softened almost imperceptibly. “You’ll be fine now. Try not to miss me too terribly.” Was that a hint of her old playful humour warming her voice? But then the elevator doors slid shut, leaving me staring after her in frustration and confusion. As always, Terra remained a puzzle I could never quite solve.

In the days that followed, I waited in a fog of restless agitation for some word from Terra before her departure. I knew not what gesture or entreaty might sway her to remain longer, as our pack healer and perhaps more. But the reckless wolf in me could not let her vanish so suddenly again without a fight. I wanted – needed – the chance to speak openly, to make amends at last.

Yet my pride kept me chained, silent. Terra seemed in no hurry to seek me out either, holing up in her rooms when not flitting about the city on unknown errands.

The penthouse felt more like a gilded prison than refuge now. Even as my father continued regaining strength under my care, melancholy still clouded my spirit. I missed deep conversation and warm laughter lighting our home. With Terra present but distant, loneliness haunted me.

Autumn’s beauty passed unappreciated outside the floor to ceiling windows. The turning colours and crisp air usually never failed to soothe my soul. But Terra’s imminent departure weighed too heavily. A chapter I had only just reopened in my life’s book was abruptly-ending before I grasped its meaning.

I had The night before Terra intended to take her leave, I finally mustered the nerve to knock at her suite once more. She called for me to enter, sounding weary. My heart sank to find her kneeling amidst neat stacks of luggage, already packed up. run out of time.

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Chapter 27

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“What can I do for you, Nathan?” Terra asked without looking up. Her use of my name rather than title kindled a fragile hope.

I cleared my throat, trying to dislodge the lump there. I only wished to see you once more before you go. And to ask… I faltered miserably. She waited without prompting, for once. I took a deep breath. “Ask if you might stay longer. I -we- would still be glad for your company

Terra rose slowly to face me, expression unreadable. “You know I can’t remain. You’ll be fine now. Your father is nearly well. thanks to our combined efforts

I stepped closer, desperate to reach through her impenetrable mask of composure. This isn’t only about my father’s health. Please, Terra. Don’t shut me out again when we’ve come so far already mending what was broken. My pride lay in tatters. but I no longer cared. I could not lose her twice.

For long agonising moments Terra simply searched my face. I held her piercing gaze unwaveringly, allowing, at last, the full depth of longing and remorse to show. She saw through to my spirit – she always had.

After the silence between us stretched taut as a bowstring. Terra sighed heavily, the detachment in her eyes softening. “Oh Nathan. I wish the past could be undone. But some roads only lead us farther from where we want to be. She rested feather- light fingers on my wrist. You will become the great leader you were meant to be. Of that I am certain

Her tender faith despite everything pierced me sharply. I clasped her hand between mine desperately. “How can I without you there challenging me to grow and see beyond myself?”

The barest hint of wistfulness flickered across Terra’s face before the neutral mask slipped back in place. She withdrew her hand gently. “You will find your way, as will 1. Our paths were destined to diverge long ago. She met my anguished look squarely “But I am grateful we had this second chance, however brief.”

When I still could not find words, frozen by the crushing reality of imminent loss, Terra stepped closer and pulled me into a fierce, brief embrace.

“Lead and live well, old friend,” she whispered close to my ear. The brush of her cheek against mine scorched like a brand. Too soon she was slipping away, the ghost of jasmine perfume all that remained of her presence.

I stood motionless even after the suite door clicked shut, unsure whether to chase after Terra or accept this was the necessary end she seemed to believe. In truth, the choice had never been mine. Fate would steer us together or apart now.

Finally I left as if moving through water, making my way to the sleek study that had become my refuge. The shadows clung more thickly now, but I no longer had any wish to resist their numbing comfort. Only the potent whiskey secreted away in a bottom drawer cut through emptiness echoing once more in my hollow chest.

Some time later, warm fingers plucked the empty glass from my own and set it aside. I blinked sluggishly to find my father standing over me, concerned about etching his brow. The heavy despair fogging my mind receded some as I straightened. under his steady gaze.

“She’s gone, isn’t she?” It was not a question. I looked away, unable to voice the truth aloud yet. But my silence spoke for me. My father sighed heavily and gripped my shoulder.

“Dark times come to us all, my son. You mustn’t let this defeat define you. The world is ever changing. We simply must keep pace.

With immense effort I met his eyes again. “You’re right, Father. I know you are. It’s only…

“You care for her deeply. I understand. His warm clasp on my shoulder kept me tethered fast as old grief and fresh loss howled through me. Sheltered in the eye of that storm, I began slowly piecing my shattered spirit back together. I would endure, somehow. It was the wolf way.

By the time golden dawn light streaked the sky, I had found some fragile acceptance. Terra walking her own lone road was never mine to prevent. She would have chafed here caged by stiding traditions and expectations, her wild spirit slowly

Chapter 27

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extinguished. Perhaps someday, somehow, our paths would meet again naturally when the timing was right.

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I clung to that slender hope through the difficult days that followed. Holding my head high before the city pack members came easier with my father’s tireless support.

He seemed to sense when the choking loneliness threatened to overwhelm me, and would draw me into debates on pack politics or share colourful stories from his youth roaming these very forests. The tales vividly recalled helped anchor me in the present, not the unchangeable past Terra now represented.

Miraculously, as autumn shifted to winter’s first chill breezes, the pain I carried gradually eased enough that I could appreciate life’s simple joys again. Laughter with my father as we took our daily constitutionals through the bustling city’s patchwork wooded parks.

The satisfaction of completing a difficult but beneficial trade agreement with our sister pack to the north. Even the mundane comforts of hot coffee on a snowy dawn or reading the morning newspaper filled me with subtler satisfaction now, as never before.

By subtle degrees, sunset’s violet hour no longer carried piercing melancholy as Terra’s absence had initially burdened it with. I smiled more readily, shoulders unburdening. Her herbs and wisdom yet ran through my spirit, remodelling me more wholly than either of us likely realised.

She had played her role, and played it well. Time did not stop, however keenly parts of my soul might resist moving on. But her rediscovered light would burn within me forever, come what may.

My father noticed the shift as well, and remarked upon it one blustery morning as we walked together admiring the city’s you these bustling holiday garb. “Your smile has returned, Nathan. It heartens me greatly to see the darkness lifting from past weeks.”

I blinked in surprise, turning inwards to take his measure. The weary weight pressing constantly on my chest had indeed begun to ease, no longer an ever-present.

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