SWNOVELS Chapter 31: Nancy Went Pale
'Nancy, you ate always asking me about my boyfriend Bryan. You know about him but you have never spoken about your boyfriend. Why are you being so secretive about him?' Anna asked Man y in the course of their chat. She had deliberately refrained from asking other personal questions like her pregnancy but she had felt the subject of a boyfriend was a safe topic to discuss so she was surprised at Nancy's pallor. She had gone quite pale.
'What did I say wrong? You should not be ashamed to talk about your relationship with me, I assumed we were friends and could at least share that much with each other.And You are an adult and I am not your mother to scold you for having a boyfriend and I promise I won't be judgmental,I have mine remember?'
But as Nancy continued to keep quiet and her paleness increased, Anna became alarmed.
'I am sorry if you do not want to tell me about him. You must have your reasons. I am sorry I asked. It is just that you have always shared in my happiness and I wanted to reciprocate'. she explained. Nancy eventually found her voice.
'No Anna, that is not so. It's just that I am not yet ready to talk about it. It is a sore topic for me', she said.
'Oh, I'm sorry. I should have known, if it were a happy topic for you, you would have spoken about it long ago. But I was so caught up in my happiness with Bryan that I had not noticed. You should not talk about it if it makes you feel bad remembering it but in my experience, it is better to talk about it and ease yourself of such a burden If you had been badly hurt, then it would facilitate your healing. No body is worth causing you so much pain such as I have seen in your eyes and you are still giving him that right by dwelling in and feeding the pain with your bitterness. I am not trying to force you to do what you do not want to do but the earlier you talk about it and deal with it by facing the demons haunting you, the earlier you shall be free of them. I am speaking not as a colleague now but as a close friend and confidant of yours'.
'Ues, I know that but what do you know of such heartbreak and pain? You are in your own world basking in the love and attention of Bryan and soon you will be his wife. You do not know what others who are not as lucky as you are to find true love or a sincere companion have to pass through'. Nancy said sadly.
Anna looked at her and read more from her words than Nancy had intended
She was full of pity for her but the she still believed that the earlier she got over that hurt, the better it would be for Nancy.
'That is where you are wrong. You asked me the other day about our boss and I told you of his experience. Yours could never have been that bad, your best friend eloping with your wife or in this case your husband and nearly causing you to go bankrupt. He nearly died of the pain and the double betrayal he felt because the one person in the world who would have given him comfort as his friend and confidant was also a participant in the betrayal tearing his heart and sould apart.
And me, you think that I have not had my own share of disappointments and heartbreaks? Oh I can assure you that I have had them but I do not allow them cloud my joy or my life. Life goes on. The person who had hurt you this badly must have gone on with his life and you are deriving yourself of joy and laughter by continually dwelling on the hurt and you feel that he is worth it? Your happiness is yours and yours alone and no one has the right to take that from you except you give them the permission'
'You mean you have been hurt before?' Nancy asked unable to believe it. The petite lady looked like someone who had it all and had not felt pain before.
'Yes I have and not once but three times but have I allowed it stop me from being happy? No, it hasn't and neither should you. My failed love stories are a topic for another day, we have to get our boss prepared for his midday appointment but please be happy and forget about any villain that does not know your worth", Anna advised.
Nancy smiled. She felt better after this chat with Anna and she was right. It was just that it pained her to see that her child was going to be born illegitimate. Without knowing her father though truth be told,he or she was better off without someone like Robert as their father.
She felt wet drops on her cheek and realised that she had been crying. She smiled through her tears as she wiped her tears off her cheek.
'Thank you so much. It has been a relief speaking with you. I fell better already. I shall definitely tell you about this some other time but for now, duty calls'.
Anna smiled sympathetically and patted her shoulder understandingly.
They went about their duties and Nancy forgot about her problems as she lost herself in her work and typing but when her workload reduced, she remembered that she had been just as happy or even happier than Anna was with her boyfriend Bryan. She had felt that she had it all. A good education, a promising career, a handsome rich man who loved her passionately and a blissful married life in the future with him but all that had been a lie. Robert had shown his real colours when she had told him of her pregnancy.
She remembered how heartbroken she had been when he had started avoiding her and not picking her calls. It had started when he had asked her to abort the pregnancy.