Perpetual

The doctors say that at this point there is nothing more they can do so we just have to wait and hang on to that thirty percent chance of her surviving this. Seeing as there is nothing that can be done, we all decide to go home. James offers to drive Pearl’s aunty home whilst Sasha offers to come home and prepare something for me to eat. I really don’t like Sasha and everything she stands for but right now I don’t have time to fight her, I don’t even have the energy to put up any fight even if I wanted to.

We get home almost at the same time, I park in my usual spot whilst she in Pearl’s spot. I don’t even wait for her to come out of the car, I have already unlocked the door and walking to my bedroom. I need a bath, a string drink and then some good rest. I don’t think I can stand another second of being sober because thoughts of what can go wrong keep eating me up.

‘I will prepare you something to eat.’ Sasha yells just before I can bang the door to the bedroom. Once inside I feel the tears come to my eyes, I find myself slowly falling to the ground and leaning against the door allowing the emotions to take the better part of me. I haven’t been very good at showing emotions but meeting Pearl has showed me that I have a side of me that I didn’t know existed. A side that wants to lay myself bare for someone, a side that is ready to love someone raw and honest, to be with them fully aware that they are human and they can error but still love them like life depends on just that.

‘Leo.’ Sasha says followed by a light knock on the door.

I pretend not to have heard her.

‘Leo I hope you are almost done bathing in there because food is almost ready.’ She yells again

I wait for a few minutes and when I hear the sound of footsteps walking away I get up from the cold floor and go to the bathroom. I make the bath quick scrubbing only the private parts.

‘I was about to come and drag you out of there.’ Sasha says when I walk in the kitchen. She has changed into comfortable pajamas, I don’t even know at what point she washed up and changed or why she came with clothes to change but this is the most decent I have seen her and she looks so comfortable in the kitchen it makes me cringe.

‘Pasta and chicken in creamy sauce.’ She announces putting the plate on the kitchen table.

‘How did you know that this is my favorite?’ I ask as I settle down

‘I looked at the timetable over there and what was dominating made me know that it was definitely a favorite in this house.’

I smile.

‘Thank you for your thoughtfulness, Sasha.’

‘You are welcome.’

‘You are not eating?’ I ask when she settles down with a glass of water opposite me.

‘I didn’t think you wanted to eat with me.’

‘Come on, you cooked for me. Why wouldn’t I want to eat with you?’

‘Leo both you and I can agree that we are not the best of friends and I hate that we have to constantly be on our necks.’

‘It’s because you always get in my neck.’

‘Whatever you mean.’ She says dishing out for herself.

‘I have said this before, whoever has a problem with Pearl also has a problem with me.’

‘She bagged herself a real one.’

‘Speaking of real ones, I thought you were obsessed with Gabriel, how have you gotten over him? Does Lona even know?’

‘She has always known, I think she just pretends not to because she is with him.’

‘And that sits well with you?’

‘What can I do? The man is with her now.’

I look at her sympathetically.

‘Don’t look at me like that Leo.’

‘I think it’s just sad that you ladies go about parading as perfect meanwhile you have these emotions that are brewing and you can’t talk to each other.’

‘It’s not as simple as it looks.’

‘Of course it is, sit her down and make her understand that you have always been in love with her man. But now seeing that they are together maybe you just need to let him go or both of them. Clearly you are still very bitter and it’s not good for your soul.’

‘Thank you for the TedTalk Leo.’

‘Stop being sarcastic. You need to let them go because this anger will make you make all the wrong decisions. You could even harm them.’

‘Come on Leo, I am not a bad person.’

‘Oh this is good.’ I say putting a mouthful of Pasta in the mouth

‘Cooking runs in the family.’

‘Of course it does.’

‘Honestly what should I do about this whole Gabriel situation? Leo I have wanted him from the time that I met him but he can’t see me. Maybe he would have but with Lona in the picture now I will always be her bestfriend.’

‘Do you want the truth?’

‘Shoot.’

‘I think you are just obsessed with the idea of being with someone, not that you are in love with him or me for that matter. You like what I have with Pearl, you like what Lona and Gabriel have. So now you also want it and you have started envying it but Sasha we are not perfect people. You need to find your person. Your soul’s mate. We are not those people and you know it.’

…

Kwenje’s Girl

Winnie

🙇🏾‍♀️