Pedigree

The drive home was very quiet, after the alcohol has worn out in my system it is hitting me that my life might not be as perfect as I have been viewing it to be. And it really hurts knowing the man who fathered me has never even recognised me as his own even though he has known all these years that I am his. Also I have so many questions for him, was my conception so bad that he couldn’t even think of opening up? Or maybe he chose to keep his friendship with his friend that playing the role of my father didn’t seem like a safe choice.

I don’t even realise that tears have started to fall, just maybe I have been preoccupied with so many things that I didn’t take time to allow myself to feel all these emotions and now they are hitting me when I least expect it.

I am deep in my emotions and thoughts when the sound of my ringing phone startles me, it’s VK calling.

I just look at the phone until it stops ringing, a part of me is upset because where was he when I was trying to reach him.

It starts ringing again, and I want to put it on silent and just ignore him completely but then I decide to pick up.

‘My God babe are you okay?’ He says sounding worried

‘Why shouldn’t I be okay? I have been calling you but then you thought it wise to go quiet on me.’

‘Babe please tell me you are fine, honestly tell me you are okay.’

‘VK I am fine, what is this about?’

‘I am rushing to the airport to get in the next available plane, Ernest needs me.’

‘What are you talking about? What is wrong with Ernest?’

He keeps quiet and from the silence it’s like he has stopped walking.

‘You haven’t heard have you?’

‘Heard what?’

‘Oh my God Kasweka.’

‘VK what haven’t I heard? What’s happening?’

‘It’s Moudy.’

‘What about her?’

‘A hit and run, she was already dead by the time they were getting her to the hospital.’

My phone slips out of my hands and it drops, I can hear VK saying my name and asking is I am still there but then I don’t respond. My eyes are popped as though they are about to come out of their sockets. My mind is void, I can’t think straight for a few minutes because what VK has told me doesn’t at all make sense.

‘I just dropped her home.’ I say tears falling finally

‘A hit and run.’

The words replay in my head as more tears fall and a part of me is scared wondering whether this is a coincidence or accident. How did she even get hit? I waited outside until she was locked inside the gate, where was she going? Who was she going to see? Did someone call her and asked her to meet outside? All this doesn’t make sense because I was with her. People don’t just get hit when they are supposed to be inside their homes.

I don’t even know who to call, I don’t know if I will even be welcomed going to their home because. After much thought, I go inside the house and change into my pajamas before sitting in front of the fire. Once again someone that I have built a relationship with has been taken away from me and this time around they will never come back because she is dead and there is nothing I can do about it.

..

Your Friend and Author

Winnie

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