Pa'an

“Hello from Worldscope! I’m Galena Lockwood. In the news today, after the leak from the Administration, we finally hear that alien intelligence has not only been found, but alien intelligences have been working with humans and US officials for months. Here in L.A. people have been reacting to this news in various ways. I’m now in Manhattan Beach to talk to a few typical people and find out what they think.”

(Pan to the right reveals a large woman with coffee-bronze skin dressed in a navy blue mu-mu with glaring yellow and orange circles on it. Galena sticks a mike in front of her face, ducking the woman’s headdress, which looks like an electrified porcupine.)

“And you are…”

“Solarine Sizzelle. I’m Solarine Sizzelle, yes I am.”

“Umm, Solarine, (ducking to keep the headdress quills away from her eyes) what do you make of the alien contact rumors?”

“Earthling, What do you make of it? Who do you think you’re talkin’ to?”

“You told our producers you own a lot of land on the sun. Do you own a lot of land on the sun?”

“About 2 million square miles of land, yes, that would be my land.”

“On the sun, Solarine?”

“Yes, I said on the sun.”

“But there is no land on the sun!”

“You would know? I can see you’ve never been on the sun. You’re pasty pale.” Solarine prods Galena in the arm with a pudgy finger, “not even a little crispy.”

“Why can’t we see it then?”

“It’s bright land. It’s very bright land.”

“Astronomers with special telescopes should be able to see it, shouldn’t they?”

“It floats. Sometimes it floats up, sometimes it floats down. Those astronomers, they never been on the sun neither.”

“So you don’t have any problems with extraterrestrial intelligence talking secretly to our government?”

“Not if the ET’s put up cash for the land they buyin’. I wouldn’t have a problem with that.”

“Thank you Solarine Sizzelle.”

“Next we talk to Doctor Nguyen Hu. Doctor Hu?”