Our Fault (Culpable Book 3)

Jenna wouldn’t leave me in peace after I told her I couldn’t go to Lion’s party. I was up to my neck in work, and going would require me to cancel five meetings, plus another one with the real estate agent handling the apartment in Manhattan.

I was making all the necessary moves to go back to LA for good. It was the best thing for me, for family reasons, and for the company. I’d done all I could do in New York. Things were in order, and it was time to close that chapter of my life.

The whole reason I’d moved there in the first place was to get away from Noah, but I was tired of being in the shadows. My little sister was back in LA, my father, my friends… Sophia’s family, too, even if that was what mattered least.

My phone rang again. I groaned and prepared myself for another onslaught. Traffic was horrible, and I kept having to look to both sides not to take out a pedestrian. That was another factor: New York was sucking the life out of me. I needed the beach. Urgently.

“Jenna, you’re turning into a major pain in my ass,” I said. I couldn’t suppress my irritation any longer.

“You listen to me, Nicholas Leister,” she replied. That almost-maternal tone made me laugh. “It’s your best friend’s birthday, the person who’s always stood with you, who’s been there for you every time you’ve screwed up. He gave you a place to stay when you ran away from home, did you forget that? You were the best man at our wedding. So move your ass unless you want me to come out there and drag you kicking and screaming.”

I didn’t have a chance to answer before I heard noises on the other line, and next thing I knew, Lion was there.

“Hey, brother,” he said, and I pricked up my ears. “Jenna, beat it, I need to talk to him. Jesus, what is going on with you?!” Finally, I heard a door shut, and he continued, “Nick, you gotta come.”

“Look, bro, I know it’s your birthday, and I honestly do feel bad about missing it, but things are insane. I just can’t make it. I’m sorry.”

“It’s about Noah,” he said. I hit the brakes in the middle of the street, and it almost cost me my rear bumper, but it didn’t matter. Judging by his tone, he needed my undivided attention.

“What about Noah?” I asked, turning onto a side street and parking.

“I don’t know. I mean, she hurt her back like three weeks ago, and she’s been at our place. She’s supposed to be resting. She can’t really move.”

“Her back? What the hell kind of back injury requires three weeks’ rest? Is she okay? Does it seem bad?” In my mind, I was already canceling all my upcoming appointments.

Lion paused for a few seconds. “Something about it doesn’t add up, dude. Jenna’s acting weird as shit. I’ve never seen her this stressed. And Noah… I don’t know, she said her back hurts, but the other day I saw her moving around, and she was fine. I think they’re up to something, and you need to be here.”

It sounded ridiculous, but if Noah was sick…

“How did she hurt herself? What was she doing?”

“She was carrying boxes. She moved. I know I should have told you, but Jenna was on my ass about how we couldn’t just keep telling you everything Noah did.”

“Why the hell was she moving? Her lodging was covered!” I said, getting out and raising my hand to hail a taxi. I couldn’t deal with driving and all this at the same time.

“I don’t know, man. You know how stubborn Noah is. I guess she wanted to be independent…”

I got in the taxi and gave the driver my address.

“For God’s sake…” I said between clenched teeth. “Where is she living now?”

“She’s with us right now, but she rented a loft off campus.”

I couldn’t believe it! Before I knew what would happen with him and Raffaella, I’d put money aside for Dad and made him promise he’d use it to pay for her dorm. And now she was in a loft somewhere. She barely knew the city. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’d found it in one of the roughest neighborhoods in town.

“Look, Nick, I already told you what I think you should do. I don’t understand women, especially not those two. But something’s not right, and it’s got to do with you. When’s the last time you ever saw Jenna so insistent about something that wasn’t shopping?”

I would have laughed, normally, but now I was worried. It was weird that Jenna was pressing me so much, especially after the last time I’d seen Noah and everything had taken such a bad turn.

Maybe they were planning to chew me out together?

Ten minutes later, I reached my building and started making phone calls. I’d be leaving a lot of people high and dry that week. And I didn’t really want to think too much about why.

I could only find one flight to LA that wasn’t completely full, and after delays, I arrived on Lion’s birthday. I didn’t land in the best of moods. I wasn’t ready to be back there, and I definitely didn’t want to be at Lion’s place, living it up. There was one thing that tempted me just then, and that was to lie down and sleep.

Steve had made sure my car was waiting for me at the airport. He’d texted me the location, so I was able to go straight there and get onto the interstate. I drove fast. I’d told Sophia I’d stop in and see her at the party, but I wasn’t sure she’d show. She was almost as busy as I was.

Jenna and Lion lived on a residential street not far from UCLA. It was nice: not too many students, lots of young couples. The one downside was it wasn’t close to the beach.

I got lucky and didn’t have to look too hard for parking. I took off my tie, rolled it up and put it in my back pocket, undid a few buttons on my shirt, and ran my fingers through my hair. None of this worked: I still looked like an exhausted businessman who’d just stepped off a plane.

I knew Noah was going to be there, and that made me a little nervous. I had no idea how she’d act when she saw me come through the door. I just hoped it wouldn’t turn ugly: I wasn’t in the mood to fight with anyone.

I walked in and caught the elevator, getting out on the fourth floor. The door to the apartment was open; it was noisy, and I could see people drinking right by the entrance. I knew most of them, and they all raised their glasses, happy to see me. The first person I looked for was Jenna, who was wearing a slinky dress and heels. She had two drinks in her hands, but she put them down as soon as she saw me and hurried over.

“Oh my God, you’re here!” she shrieked, almost hysterical.

“I’m here!” I said, imitating her high voice.

She didn’t think that was funny. Plus she seemed on edge. That was not typical for her. “I mean, it’s not like you confirmed…”

“I told Lion I’d try, but I didn’t manage to find a flight till this morning… Anyway, now you’ve got me,” I said, taking one of the cups she’d set down, drinking it, and grimacing with disgust.

“What the hell is that?” I asked, handing it back to her.

“Pineapple juice,” she replied, arching her eyebrows.

I looked around, then back at her. “Pineapple juice… What are we, like twelve, and I just forgot…?”

Jenna murmured something I couldn’t make out and handed me a different glass.

Whiskey…that was more like it.

“So, Jen…where’s Lion?”

“In the kitchen. See you soon,” she responded, vanishing in the direction of the living room.

I didn’t know why, but I decided to follow her. The apartment was full of people, and I had to elbow my way through. When I managed to see past the heads of everyone there, I noticed Jenna was leaning down over someone on the sofa.

It was Noah. Jenna righted herself, and just then, Noah saw me. Even from across the room, I could tell she had gone pale.

Lion cut in front of me and hugged me so tightly, he almost broke all the bones in my back.

“Thanks for coming, dude!” he exclaimed, and I smiled back at him, but I kept looking over at Noah. She had turned her head and looked tense sitting there among the cushions.

Lion saw where my eyes were pointed and nodded. “Poor thing…she’s been there since people started showing up. I told her there was no need to mingle, but she insisted.”

“Sure,” I said.

Only Noah would come down to a party in that condition.

I finished my drink and left my glass on the grand piano. After all, I was only there for one reason…right?

I knew something was wrong with her when I walked over and she didn’t take off running in the other direction. She looked funny there on the sofa in a black sweatshirt with a blanket over her legs. Her face was radiant; I even felt a pang in my heart as I came over and sat down in front of her on the coffee table. I smiled as I saw the twenty-eight freckles on her nose that I’d missed so badly. Then my eyes seemed to get snagged on her lips.

“Look at you… You look like a wounded little bird that can’t fly anymore,” I said, smiling.

I didn’t want to relive the last moments we’d shared: her in my arms, destroyed, begging me not to leave her. That had tortured me every night since I’d gone back to New York.

“I didn’t think you’d come,” she said, gripping the blanket like a lifeline.

I turned my head to one side and nodded. “I made a few phone calls and got a seat on a plane. I feel terrible. I’ve only ever flown in business class!”

She nodded, but she didn’t seem all there.

“Would you still be sitting there if you’d known I was coming?” I asked, since she hadn’t bothered to respond.

Her cheeks turned a pink color too alluring for my mental health. But at least I was getting somewhere.

“Everything okay?” I asked, unable to keep my affection for her out of my voice. Something was weird, and I was starting to feel uncomfortable.

Noah looked all around, as if she needed someone or something to come to her aid. The music wasn’t that loud, but I felt like I was deaf, and I had a feeling she did, too.

“I’m fine, just a little tired.”

“Who are you looking for?” I asked, and that got her to look back at me. There was a fear in her eyes I’d never seen before…and that made every fiber in my body tense as I wanted to find out what had done that to her.

Then I realized it was me. Before I could ask her anything more, Jenna sat next to Noah on the sofa, took her hand, and squeezed it. Noah smiled.

“Everything good over here?” she asked.

Not letting me answer, Noah shouted, “Lion!” He rushed over. “Could you take me upstairs? I think this is enough for today.”

Jenna frowned at Noah. When Lion leaned over, I instinctively rested a hand on his chest, stopping him.

I felt cornered. Everything was weird. Noah wanting Lion to help her instead of me had hurt like a kick to the stomach.

“I’ll take her,” I said, trying to look relaxed. I kneeled, catching her off guard, but she grabbed me tightly around the neck. She was trembling. I got out of there and upstairs as quickly as I could.

“I didn’t ask you to take me,” she hissed.

Great, now I’d pissed her off.

I went straight to the guest room. I knew which one it was: I’d stayed there a couple of nights after countless beers followed by one too many nightcaps.

I put one foot on the bed to pull back the sheets, a little too jerkily if her back really was hurt. Then I laid her down and covered her up. I looked at her all tucked in there and tried not to laugh.

She reached up and grabbed my hand, pulling me onto the mattress. She was leaning against the headboard and looking me straight in the eyes.

“I’ve got to tell you something,” she said with a trembling voice, squeezing my hand until it almost hurt.

I narrowed my eyes, waiting for her to continue, and just as she opened her mouth, the door opened, and Sophia appeared on the threshold.

All the color drained from Noah’s face.

“They told me they saw you come up here,” Sophia said, observing me with feigned calm.

I stood up, looking back and forth between the two of them.

I could tell from Noah’s reaction that nothing good could come of this, but the worst thing of all was, I had no desire to go downstairs with Sophia. To the contrary, I wanted to shut the door in her face and listen to what Noah had to say.