SWNOVELS Otherwise Engaged: Chapter 25
Balmy evening air surrounded us as Thayer and I exited the resort lounge, both of us too fatigued to make small talk. Above us, the sky was an inky black sprinkled with a handful of stars; they were far more visible here than at home with the light pollution of the city. Right now, the only source of illumination came from soft twinkle lights threaded in the tropical shrubbery lining the path.
I wouldn’t say our first evening in Mexico was a total disaster, but I wouldn’t say it went well, either.
There was inexplicable tension between Adam and Quinn that had manifested in passive-aggressive conversations and frosty body language, permeating the atmosphere at the table, and making things tense for everyone else. With Millie and Louis also in attendance, the net result made me want to drown myself in tequila. But I hadn’t, because I still had a full night’s work ahead of me, wherein I would be playing sudoku with the company’s books after another payment bounced on me unexpectedly. It needed to be rectified before the bank reopened on Monday morning, which meant I had to get it done before we went to Señor Bongos tomorrow night. Much as I would have liked to use it as an excuse to bail altogether, I didn’t want Adam to know I was working while on ‘vacation.’ It might raise a red flag and send him sniffing around.
“I’m worried about Quinn,” Thayer murmured. “She’s going through something difficult right now. I can’t get into it, but it’s tough. I feel sorry for her.”
Maybe that explained the animosity between Adam and Quinn earlier. It certainly seemed to run a lot deeper than your typical, run-of-the-mill fighting that normal couples engage in. I wasn’t sure whether it had to do with the money or whether Quinn even knew about her father’s money. Then again, Adam was a douche. The possible sources of conflict were limitless with him.
When I realized Thayer was still waiting for me to respond. I tried to sound sympathetic but fell short, landing on a flat, “Sorry.”
“Oh my God!” Thayer stopped short, both hands flying to grab hold of my arm. Her fingertips dug into my skin. “What is that?”
Some idiotic, testosterone-ridden part of me took enjoyment in her reaction; at least, the part where she grabbed me because she was scared. I came to a halt, peering down in front of us. A teeny green lizard stood in our path. It was kind of cute, actually, as far as lizards were concerned.
“I’m not a zoologist,” I said, “but I think it’s a gecko.”
Thayer heaved a sigh of relief, peering closer at our lizard friend. A bubble of laughter escaped her cherry-red lips. “Okay, I feel silly now. It just startled me when it ran out in front of us.”
“A little stressed?” I bit my tongue, fighting the urge to slip in a suggestion regarding an old, tried-and-true stress reliever: sex. Lord knew, I could have used it. It would be a win-win situation, really, but convincing her of that would be a stretch.
“You could say that.”
We side-stepped the gecko, who seemed content to remain in the middle of the path. A massive bed of pink and purple flowers appeared off to the side, its tropical fragrance wafting through the air. Thayer inhaled deeply and let out another sigh, but this time it sounded weary.
We stepped into the hall leading to our room, lapsing back into silence. While Quinn was clearly weighing on Thayer’s mind, I gave precisely zero fucks about her sister myself. She played a starring role in destroying my family’s reputation back in high school, airing our goddamn dirty laundry through our snooty prep academy. I was convinced that Holden’s lifelong struggle with major depression and suicidal ideation all funneled back to that initial incident.
Worse still, Quinn seemed utterly oblivious to the damage she caused. Self-absorbed till the end, I supposed. The fact that Quinn and I had never been close to begin with made it easier to hold it against her than it was with Thayer. That one was proving increasingly difficult.
Generally speaking, I cherished my grudges; they fueled me. If anyone told me I couldn’t do something, I would do it twice and send them a picture flipping them off while I did, just to be a spiteful dick.
Not to mention, I ought to keep my eyes on the prize: securing the funding, winning the bid, and continuing my mission to annihilate Adam.
But it was easy to forget all those things when Thayer was standing beside me looking like a goddamn masterpiece. Her low-cut, flowy sundress hugged her slender frame, showing off every curve. She’d picked up a light tan at the pool earlier, and her smooth skin glowed against the crisp white fabric. Then I remembered the kiss at the airport…
“Do you have the key?” Thayer nudged me with her elbow, bringing me back to reality.
Pick your jaw up off the floor, Bradford.
I fished the room card out of my pocket and swiped us in. We both took turns washing up for bed, with Thayer allowing me to go first so I could boot up my laptop and get started. Just when I finally started to make some sense of the numbers staring back at me, the bathroom door creaked open, and Thayer padded out. My eyes stayed fixed to the spreadsheet while she passed behind me and retrieved a bottle of water from the fridge.
“Is it okay if I turn off the rest of the lights and leave this lamp on for you?” Thayer paused beside the end table, switching on the floor lamp.
When I turned away from the screen to look at her, my cock literally jumped in response. Her clingy black camisole dipped low in the front, the slightest hint of her nipples visible through the fabric. The matching shorts were tiny, and everything hugged her curves perfectly.
I must have done a poor job at concealing my reaction because her face folded into a frown, and she glanced down at her pajamas, searching for the source of the problem. I wanted to throw her down onto the bed and do unimaginably filthy things to her. That was the problem.
“What?” She lifted her chin, and our eyes met, which was a much-needed reminder to keep my gaze above shoulder-level. Even in my peripheral vision, the sight of her body in those skimpy pajamas was beyond distracting. I could barely remember my first name, let alone return my attention to the numbers in front of me and make sense of them any time soon. There was no blood supply running to my head.
And there was nothing I could even do about it. Fantastic.
“Nothing,” I lied. “I’m just tired. “That sounds fine. I’ll try not to be too loud.”
Her brow pulled together. “Are you sure? You’re not using work as a reason to avoid being in the bed with me, are you? I know I gave you a hard time about it earlier, but it’s fine. I promise.”
I wished that were the case. I really did. Unfortunately, I had more pressing matters to attend to than nursing my fragile ego.
Plus, I’d way rather have been in bed with her than stuck dealing with this.
“No, I have to untangle these figures sometime over the weekend, and I don’t want to leave it till the last minute, that’s all.”
My eyes traced her face, and I realized it was the first time I’d ever seen her without any makeup on since our whole arrangement had started. Her skin was smooth and even, eyelashes less dramatic, bare lips a rosy pink. She looked younger in a way that reminded me of high school all over again, setting off an unfamiliar pang in my gut. Nostalgia, maybe.
I shifted in the chair and swallowed, willing the bittersweet feelings to recede.
“Do you want me to help you?” Thayer took a tentative step closer and placed a hand on the back of my chair. Her fingertips brushed my upper arm. “Sometimes a fresh set of eyes can make all the difference.”
For a second, I seriously considered it. I was certain there was something I was missing, and because that’s how these things tended to work, it was probably staring me right in the face. At the same time, I didn’t want her to know how dire my financial situation was.
“I think I’ve got it handled, but thanks.”
Disappointment washed over her face, subtle like she was trying to hide it, but detectable all the same.
“Offer stands, anyway.” Thayer squeezed my shoulder and headed into the bedroom area, slipping beneath the covers before turning out the bedside lamp. The gesture of affection wasn’t lost on me, and it further added to the rodeo of emotions I was trying to wrangle.
I returned my attention to the screen and made an effort to type quietly, not wanting to disturb her. Minutes passed, and I could sense that she was still awake in the darkness. Then the room took on a new type of silence and I knew she was asleep.
Guilt seeped into my brain, trickling into my consciousness like water torture—drop by drop, steady and relentless. I was an asshole. Offering to help was her olive branch, and I shoved it back in her face because of my ridiculous male pride.
There I went, backsliding again. Why did I even care about her feelings? How could I allow myself to let everything go when she’d never even apologized? The jumble of numbers in front of me made as little sense as what was going on inside my head. I could explain away the attraction piece of it. If I didn’t think about the rest of it too closely, I could wave that off as a superficial desire to engage in hot, angry sex with an objectively gorgeous woman.
What I couldn’t explain was everything else.
It was easier to tell myself I didn’t have feelings. I sought out Thayer to avoid complications—at least, that’s what I told myself. Tried to fake a relationship to avoid a real one, and now, some part of me wanted the fake one to be real. The closer we got, the more it weighed on me. The lines we’d drawn were starting to blur, and I didn’t know what any of it meant.
IT WAS QUARTER PAST NINE, and I was on my third caffeinated beverage of the morning. The first two had been consumed in a frenzy twenty minutes prior.
The alarm had sounded not long after I went to bed, and Thayer slid out of bed to hit the hotel gym for an early morning workout. Who exercised on vacation? I sure as hell didn’t, unless enthusiastic sex counted. Then again, I wasn’t doing that either.
Thayer’s voice rang out. “Bennett?”
She had returned from her gym and showered before I even got out of bed. Then she’d headed back out for breakfast with Quinn, and I’d finally started my day. Or tried to, because I was a walking zombie.
“Out here.” I was sitting on the deck, nursing a coffee courtesy of room service.
I felt like shit—and looked it, based on a quick post-shower assessment. Largely because I stayed up half the night triaging emergencies like a fucking ER doctor, talking out in the hall so I didn’t disturb Thayer.
First, I had to talk Ian off the ledge after he caught wind of the IRS arrears. It took significant finesse to spin that one, but eventually, I managed to convince him that it wasn’t the end of the world, wasn’t directly my fault, and that I hadn’t so much hidden it from him as ‘sheltered him’ as a favor. He was still pissed when we ended the call, but it was salvageable. It would just take a lot of groveling when I returned.
The moment one fire was extinguished, another ignited, and Holden called me, completely distraught after a fight with his girlfriend. Amongst other things that were said, she accused him of being ’emotionally unavailable.’ I mean, his last name was Bradford—emotionally unavailable was a given.
That situation was trickier to navigate than Ian; throw in Holden’s history of anxiety and depression, our mother’s cancer relapse, and my little brother was not coping well with life in general. At one point, I was questioning whether I needed to fly back home early, but I managed to talk him into sleeping in their spare bedroom and calling me in the morning. He hadn’t called yet, though, and I was starting to get worried.
Thayer barreled through the living room and out onto the patio with a stack of glossy tour brochures in one hand.
“Hey, have you decided what you want to do later for an excur—oh.” Her gaze landed on my torso, eyes widening. Then she quickly averted her gaze, looking up at the ceiling. “Oh, my.”
Breaking news: Thayer had a thing for abs.
“Something wrong?” I locked my phone and set it aside, taking a swig of my coffee and making no effort to hide my amusement.
“You’re not dressed.”
I propped my legs up on the small table across from me. “Sure I am.”
“Not fully dressed. It’s not…proper.” She stole another glance at me and looked away, shielding her line of sight using the brochures as a blinder. The breeze picked up, ruffling her long hair.
So dramatic, this one. Being undressed paled in comparison to the other improper things I wanted to do to her. But she was cute when she was rattled.
“How is this any different than when we were sitting by the pool yesterday?” Which, by the way, had been torture for me. I was certain she’d purchased the smallest string bikini on the planet.
“Because now we’re alone. Go put on a shirt, please. Even McDonald’s requires that.”
I gestured to the glass double doors, which were propped open to the balcony. “We’re not at McDonald’s, we’re on a beach in Mexico, and it’s over ninety degrees outside.”
“Turn up the air conditioning.”
“Outside? Sure thing. Then I’ll go put on a three-piece suit while I’m at it.” I reached for my coffee cup, eyeing her over the edge of the rim while I drained the last of it.
“Would you mind?” Thayer asked, peering through her fingers. Her fake engagement ring glinted in the sunlight. “That would be great.”
Suddenly, I was fully alert, and it wasn’t because of my beverage. I was both annoyed and turned on, and the effect was self-perpetuating.
Pushing to stand, I walked around the other lounge chair to stand in front of her. Her scent drifted over to me and mingled with the scent of her coconut sunscreen, an incredibly appealing combination. From this angle, I could see straight down her tank top, treating me to a prime view of the tiny bikini underneath.
“No.” I peered down at her, but she wouldn’t meet my eyes.
Thayer’s breath quickened, and she stood frozen in place, still refusing to look at me—but I was pretty sure I caught her peeking. Regardless of how we felt about each other inwardly, the superficial attraction was difficult to ignore.
A beat passed and neither of us moved, locked in one of our infamous silent standoffs.
She drew in a breath and dropped her hands, pale blue eyes taking on a dangerous gleam. “Fine.”
Taking a step back into the hotel room, she planted her hands on her hips and jutted her chin defiantly. Looking me in the eye, she grabbed the hem of her white tank top and yanked it over her head, tossing it onto the floor.
I watched, transfixed. If stripping was her idea of punishment, I was absolutely game.
My grip on the mug tightened as she undid the button of her tan linen shorts, sliding them down and stepping out of them. All that remained was a small black string bikini and miles of smooth, touchable skin. Curvy hips, perfect for grabbing hold of during all kinds of naughty activities. Perfect small breasts, showcased in a halter top fastened by a single bow that would be all too easy to untie. One small tug was all that stood between me and that glorious rack.
It took every ounce of strength I had not to ogle her. Not to touch her. And it showed.
“What’s the matter?” Thayer raised an eyebrow. “It’s just a bikini. Like we’re sitting by the pool. Right?”
I cleared my throat, but nothing could hide the rasp in my voice. “Right.” Except now, we were alone.
“You won’t mind if I hang out and do my hair and makeup like this, I assume.” Her tongue darted out and licked her bare pink lip, eliciting another stirring below my waist.
“If you’re wearing that,” I said, “you can do whatever you want. Including me.”
She rolled her eyes. “Pass.” Spinning on her heel, she turned and marched toward the bathroom. Her hips swayed with every step, string bikini bottom showcasing her sculpted backside.
I watched her figure disappear around the corner before grabbing the stack of colorful brochures she’d abandoned on the table, sorting through the options. Ancient ruins? No. Scuba diving? Nah. A stroll through the eco-park? Maybe tomorrow.
If we weren’t going to have sex, I needed some kind out outlet for all this energy and frustration coursing through my body. Something where I could chase an adrenaline rush and forget about things for a while.
My gaze landed on the bottom brochure.
Something just like that.