One Sided Love

Kate

It is almost a month since Alex become a little civil with me... he has his moment but then he apologized for his behavior n I feel sad for him something.... Alex every night came to my room n we have a mind blowing sex but after sex he become so distant like he become that Alex... of which im scared n hate... he never said anything just leave the bed immediately n

Went to his room without a glance... those moments kill me.... and in my silly mind im still trying to win alex heart for Me n my baby but I know people like my father n Alex never change their mind...

One night Alex was in my room, after intense lovemaking I fall to Alex chest, his eyes was closed but he was not sleeping n he was breathing loudly and at that moment the baby kick, Alex become so rigid n tense that I can feel at any moment he will explode, he gently remove me and picked his clothes but I don't want him to go

I said 'Alex can you stay for a moment,I me after that you can go to your room'

He sighs loudly n replied ' Kate, its late'

I said ' But...

He said 'kate plz... don't make this awkward... I told you before that dont expect something else just because we are sleeping together... I have been honest n clear to you ... didn't I?'

I sadly replied 'Yes Alex, Im sorry'

He looked a little guilty n just giving me a nod he left

And now im cooking breakfast n the household staff is cleaning the rooms since Alex mom n alex cuzns are coming to meet us...

I have an appointment today with the doctor n she said I should also bring Alex cause she thinks husband should be more involved in the pregnancy but how can I tell her my case to her... but im stupid girl who amways hope, that may be alex go with me... emma was eating n blabbing something... Alex was eating his breakfast n reading newspaper ... I thought I should start conversation with something normal

I said ' Alex ...so when your parents n cuzn are coming?.... so that I can look after their room n prepared food before'

He replied' umm I guess around 8 but I don't think so they will stay... they will have a dinner.... martha the cook she knows very well how to prepare dinner for no of people so you just relax'

I said 'Alex I loved to cook... n secondly I can take martha help If I become tired but you said no of people...who else is coming'

He said' well I forget to tell you my uncle n aunty with their daughter is coming but since uncle sam has become friends with your dad so I n my father thought to called your parents too'

I become little nervouse when ever I think will meet my parents 'oh'

He said ' don't worry about it... I have already talked to your dad about your situation n well he is not happy but thats the statement of the year ... well try to avoid him n any thing that make you feel that can create scene'

I looked so uncomfortable right now not only im meeting Alex family so personally but my parent's know about my pregnancy... n now I have to tell him about the appointment

I said 'Alex there is something else too... actually today is my appointment in noon, my doctor says that she wants you to come too... she wants to discuss something... I know your busy but is it possible you can come I will really appreciate that may be today we know the sex of the baby.'... I said it with a shaky smile

Alex replied annoyingly' Kate... what should I do with your appointment... I told you multiple time don't expect anything from me... you want this baby not me ... if you need money then I ask that not something I can't commit'

He said this all slowly but so much in anger that my eyes filled with tears.... I picked Emma n said ' no alex I don't need money ... I really forget... I will go myself ... n don't worry about emma martha is going to be there with her till I reached hospital... n tonight dinner going to be prepared on time... oh shoot you are getting late for office... I should take emma for bath'

N with that I left alex alone in dinning room.

At 12 I reached hospital n wait for my turn... I saw everyone has come with their partners n they looked so happy... not like me whose is going to know the gender of her baby without her husband... when my turn came the nurse start looking at my vitals n my blood pressure

The doctor did my ultrasound n heard my baby voices

The doctor say' Do you want to know the gender'

I said ' yeah...(I laughed a little)... if thats even possible'

The doctor smiled' yes...well looked at the screen here... it look like you r having a baby girl'

A girl... oh my god a daughter... emmas having a sister...I was laughing n crying at the same time... but then I remember.... is this history is repeating it self... I was an unwanted daughter too n haved ignored all my life

The doctor start calling my name loudly... I saw ..

The doctor said ' Kate ... oh my... kate you r ok.... were you having a panic attack because you were shaking ... I become so scared'

I replied 'im ok just a little excited... the baby is ok?'

The doctor said ' you should have told me about the attacks emma.... never hide this from doctor.... n yes the baby looks ok for now but you really do have to take care of yourself.... n where is your husband... I told you to bring him... I want to discuss something' I said ' He wanted to come but he has an important meeting today ...'

The doctor shake her head in disappointment... she said that if I were have panic attack again I should breath heavily n n try to block my images with something good...

When I reached home... all the time I was thinking I was having a daughter ... but I don't know with whom I share this news ...cause my parents are never interested in me so why would they be interested in my child.... Alex has brutally told me regarding his interest in this pregnancy... so I went directly to emma n said ' hi baby girl'

She replied mama kate..'

Emma something called me mama kate ... Alex doesn't know about that n I have no idea how he is going to even react... but I leave that tension to another moment

I picked Emma n said 'you know emmie you are going to become a sister... im going to have a baby... just like you n you will be a big sister'

Emma said' oh baby... emma want baby... im sister'

I laughed' oh yes baby girl you r going to be soon'

I kissed her head n put her on her play pan.And went to kitchen for making tonight dinner.