Chapter 13
Hailey's POV
Getting dressed for my dad slash not my dad felt like a drag. I mean, don't get me wrong, I want to go say goodbye to the man I thought all my life was my father but did I deserve to? Did any of us deserve to lay him to rest?
My mother and his twin betrayed him in the worst possible way. I'm the product of a betrayal, a permanent reminder of what my mother did. I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror, who could?
Yes, I look like my dad but I also look like his twin. Looking like him was probably the worst thing because then it told him I looked like the brother. Every time he looked at me, he saw it over and over again.
A knock on the door brought me out of that dark place, a head similar to the man I'm to bury today popping through.
Just great.
"Can we talk? After the funeral that is and then I'll leave you alone. If you don't want a relationship with me, I will understand and keep my distance but please give me a few minutes to say a few words to you. I just need you to listen.” He says to me and I nod my head, not even sure why I did that but I did.
He smiles, it feels weird and I think he feels it too because he quickly closes the door, taking me back to that lonely dark place where I blame myself again for my father's pain.
'You are innocent from all of this.’ That voice in my head goes again.
Startling me, I run out of my room quickly to look for Jaxon who was surprisingly keeping his distance from me and I need him more today.
"Hey Hailey. Figured you'd need a friend today, sorry I haven't been around much." Vincent says to me and I pull him in for a hug.
"You're there when it counts. Thank you." I say before pulling away from him.
"Come on, we were all waiting for you.” He says, gently taking my hand in his. We walk out of the house, where everyone was waiting including Jaxon, who smiles when I look at him. I guess a smile does the job too.
Grandma Ferguson takes my hand and leads me to her car, where a driver opens the door for us to get in and we do. The entire ride to the church was a blur as the reality creeped in, reminding me of what I've lost. The whole church service was a blur too, I wasn't even paying attention as my dad's casket was all I could look at.
The good memories played over and over in my head, they weren't many but I had some and I will never forget them. He was my dad, he will always be because I loved him and I choose to believe he did too in his own twisted way or he loved me before he found out about the betrayal and that's enough.
That little bit of love is all that I needed to choose how I would remember him. He was hurt in one of the worst ways and who could blame him?
"Hailey?" The priest called to me.
We were now at the cemetery and how we got here, I could never tell you. I didn't even realize we had left the church until I was called out of my thoughts.
"It is your turn to say something.” Grandma Ferguson whispers in my ear and I stand up, Jaxon looking at me to see if I needed him but I shake my head no.
I will find the strength to deliver this eulogy. I was all that was left of him even though biologically I was never his. He raised me for a time and that was enough. It should be enough.
"My father, was not a nice man. He made a lot of enemies, even in the family. I'm sure some of you are probably asking yourselves why I'm even here, or why I'd even bother saying a few words to the man that told the whole world that I was not his daughter in a drunken outburst. Well, nobody is perfect and if I don't do it, I don't think there's anyone capable enough to say kinder words. Right now, My father is in a world now that harbors no hate or room for resentment so what's the point? All there is in his new world is light and I'm hoping he gets to work his way towards it. I've learned much from that man, might not be the usual teachings of a father that adores their child but it's because of him I'm so hardworking. It is because of him that I know unconditional love and that I possess such a trait, to love him even when some thought he didn't deserve it, when he truly believed he did not deserve it. I loved him, I cared about him and I wish him the safest passage to the after life. May he finally know peace, know true love and find a family that will be true to him because he deserves that. Go easy dad, we will meet again.” I say. I look at my grandmother, who was crying her eyes out and then at my new dad, who looked like he was in physical pain as he sat there.
I walk back to my seat, next to my lovely grandmother.
"That was beautiful.” She says to me and I nod my head, quickly going back to that numbness and thanking it, going back in my head and not listening to a thing they said after me.
It was only once we made it back home that I felt present in the moment. With everyone dropping off sympathy bakes or grills, drinking coffee or alcohol, whatever they fancied.
Jaxon was nowhere to be found, his sidekick had disappeared too and I found that odd.
"Can we talk now?" Theodore asked as I followed him outside, reminding myself to find Jaxon and ask him why he was so distant.
"Just one question, were you born with a birthmark?" He asks me and I nod my head yes.
I pull down my collar to show him the crescent shaped mark on my breastbone.
"It can’t be.." He says, touching his chest.
"Why can't it be?" I ask him and he pulls down his shirt to show me his birthmark and it looked like mine, in the very same place.
"So I'm guessing that's the proof you needed?" I ask him.
"No. I can feel that you are mine, I felt some closeness to you before, when I kept my distance but I thought it was because my brother and I were twins. Now I know you are mine and I want to be a parent to you, if you'll have me. I will keep my distance but I'll be there for you when you need me. I will always be close by and you will never truly be alone. I won't force a relationship with you, just know that whenever you are ready, I'll be there to start the journey with you.” He says to me, pulling me in for a hug before kissing my forehead and leaving me to my thoughts.
Jaxon's POV
She was his child and now it was confirmed that she was indeed a wolf. It was only a matter of time before she shifts, her wolf should be awakened by now.
There's no word for the pain I feel right now. This is what we live for, finding a mate and experiencing the joy of a lifetime but now there's no way I could ever be with her, no way I could ever experience true joy that would come from her.
The only joy that matters.
I deserve it but if I want to be alpha of my pack and give my pack a future, I'd have to leave her behind. Leave our love here and live out my life hoping she never gets to experience the pain of loving someone you can't have.
The daughter of the crescent moon. She was never mine to keep in the first place and very soon, she would have to be with her kind.
"Everything is set. We have to go now." Brett says to me, patting my back as comfort while we both look at my one and only.
I steal one last look at my beautiful mate, who stood there crying and my body aching to run up to her and comfort her but I promised to keep my distance.
"Goodbye Hailey, hopefully one day you'll forgive me." I say before running off in to the woods..... If only she knew she had my heart already.