Never His Mate: a Rejected Mates Shifter Romance (Claws and Fangs Book 1)

I’m sitting on the couch, mindlessly watching a re-run of one of my shows, when I hear the rap against the glass balcony door.

Ryker was gone when I woke up. Three hours later, as I’m thinking about making lunch, he returns.

I think he likes the fire escape. Either that or the idea of riding the elevator up to my floor irritates his wolf as much as it does mine. The confinement in the small room always has my wolf pacing, and the way it stinks of vamps is often overwhelming. If I have my choice, I take the fire escape, too.

Ryker’s out there now. Wearing a different black tee—one that’s tight enough to show off his magnificent shifter’s physique—plus jeans and a sturdy pair of boots, a front lock of hair flopping into one of his dark gold eyes, he uses two knuckles against the glass to catch my attention.

And then, when he sees that he has it, he grins.

My stomach goes tight.

Does he have to look that tempting? It would be so much easier to simply ignore him if he wasn’t that Luna damned attractive.

Worse, he knows it, too.

Arrogant bastard.

I toss the remote and slowly unfold myself from my comfy position in the corner of the couch. Wearing a suspicious expression I don’t even bother to hide, I approach the balcony door, though I don’t open it.

The glass is strong enough to keep out the full brunt of Ryker’s scent. Right now, I’ll take any help I can get.

“What?”

“Can you come out here?”

“What for?”

“I just want to talk.”

Talk? Really?

He must pick up on my hesitation even through the door because he holds up his hands in a gesture of harmlessness. “Just talk. No tricks.”

You know what? Just talk… I think that’s an excellent idea. I’ve got a thing or two I’d like to say to Ryker.

But not here. Aleks went back into his room, and maybe he’s sleeping, but it just doesn’t seem right to have this conversation outside on the balcony while my roommate is home.

“Go back around the front,” I tell Ryker. “There’s a park about five blocks away from here. It has a couple of benches and some privacy. Meet me there.”

For a moment, it looks like he’s going to argue with me. He doesn’t, though. He just uses his pointer finger to gesture in both directions. When I tell him to go right, he nods, then disappears down the fire escape.

I sigh, hoping I’m not making a major mistake, and go searching for my shoes.

Ten minutes later, I stroll up to the bench. I’ve got nervous hands in my pocket, a blank expression on my face, and my long sheet of hair falling forward like a curtain. I don’t want to make it look like I particularly want to be here, and I’m trying to hide the way my heart just about stuttered in my chest when I saw him sitting alone on the bench.

I think I forgot how big Ryker is. I know he’s got at least a head on me, and his body is pure shifter perfection, but it’s something about his being an alpha. His aura extends even further than his broad shoulders do, and though the bench is wide enough to seat three, he takes up way more space than he should.

Or maybe that’s because of the way he’s sitting. Legs spread, arms resting on the back of the bench, he looks like he’s content to sit here for as long as it takes.

Comfortable. He seems comfortable.

Me? I’m just about crawling out of my skin with a need to touch him, and he’s comfortable.

The unfairness of it all has me stomping over to him. “Okay. I’m here. What do you want to talk about?”

“Take a seat, Gemma.”

His command rankles. “I think I’ll stand.”

“Please.”

Ugh. I plop myself next to him. “Fine.”

A flash of a satisfied smile, then he tilts his head. He’s staring openly at me in that way he has that makes me feel like he’s looking straight through me.

“What are you doing?” I ask him.

“Just looking at you. That dress you had on last night was nice, but I’ve seen you in dresses before. This is different. I like different. Let me appreciate it.”

I look down. I’m wearing a worn pair of jeans, a dark grey tank top that leaves my toned arms on display, and my favorite pair of boots. It’s what I like to wear when I can actually be myself and not act like Little Miss Shifter Barbie, but it’s nothing special.

I mean, I do think I look pretty damn good, but it’s a shock to hear Ryker agree when it really is so different than anything he’s ever seen me wear before.

What’s going on here? This… this isn’t what I expected when he said he wanted to talk. Another tactic maybe? He tried forceful at Charlie’s, he tried sneaky last night, and now he’s trying to flatter me.

But he’s also being honest and, for some reason, that really puts my back up.

“I don’t think⁠—”

“Have I ever told you that you’re absolutely gorgeous?” he says, interrupting me. “Even if you weren’t meant to be mine, you’d be just the type of female I’d choose. You were a fucking vision in those sundresses and with those curls, but now?” My shock only grows when he drops his hand to his crotch, drawing my attention to the obvious erection pushing against his jeans. “The things I want to do to you, Gemma. Unh. Come on, sweetheart. Say yes. Be mine.”

Forget flattering. This is a pure sexual onslaught that I definitely wasn’t prepared for.

I stare at the outline of his dick for longer than I probably should. When I hear him take a deep breath, followed by a rumbled groan, my cheeks flame up. No doubt he’s picking up on my sudden arousal.

I can’t help it. My heart is wary, my head knows to be guarded against this male, but my pussy? Yeah. She’s never gotten the message.

I clamp my thighs together, scooting a little further away from him. When I’m on the edge of the bench, inches away from dropping to the sidewalk, I clear my throat. “That’s what you want to talk about?”

“Luna, yes.”

Okay, then. Two can play this game. He knows he can turn me on thanks to his nose, but there’s no hiding that erection from anyone.

I point at it. “Where was that attitude last year?”

“It was there, but last year I had to be careful not to frighten my omega mate away from just how bad I wanted her. Now that I know you’re no more an omega than I am, I don’t have to hold my wolf back.”

Then, as if proving his point, he snaps his canines at me.

I jump and only manage to save myself from landing on the ground by a single claw. Ignoring his chuffing laugh, I shift so that I’m sitting closer to him.

He sucks in a breath.

Ha. Good to see I affect him as much as he affects me.

I cross my legs, the toe of my boot brushing up against the top of his calf. With another groan, he widens his legs so that his thigh touches mine.

It’s a dare, and I know I’m only doing what he wants, but I refuse to be the first to move. Instead, I slide my jeans against his, then tell him as sweetly as I can, “You should’ve come looking for me last year when you discovered the truth. Maybe then I would’ve still cared.”

He stiffens next to me. Not because he’s aroused—which, yeah, he is—but because he’s suddenly fuming.

I can feel the rush of angry heat from where I’m sitting.

“I did⁠—”

I scoff. “Please.”

A rumble deep in his chest, before he snaps,“How many times do I have to tell you that I did? It’s not my fault it took so fucking long. If you weren’t wearing that fang, I would’ve found you a year ago.” Beneath the sunlight, his shifter’s eyes flare a brilliant amber color. His raspy voice turns hollow. “Fair play to Filan. He knew exactly what he had to do to keep you away from me. And without you feeling me on the other end of our bond, it’s so Luna damned easy to forget that we’re made for each other. Ain’t that right, Gemma?”

What?

“What are you talking about? Our bond died the night you rejected me.” At Ryker’s scoff, I raise my voice a little. “Aleks didn’t even know that I was running out on you when I first met him. I don’t even think I mentioned your name the first few weeks I was in Muncie. If he hates you now, it’s just that he’s protective of me. You did a number on me, Ryker. I’m not gonna let you do it again. Aleks has nothing to do with that.”

“Oh, sweetheart. You can’t be that naive.”

“What do you mean?”

“You know he’s in love with you, right?”

It’s one thing to know that. But to hear Ryker put it out there like that?

I shake my head royally, knocking the curtain of hair out of my face. “He’s… he’s told me he has feelings for me. But I told him I don’t feel the same, and he gets that.”

Ryker gives me a look of pure disbelief.

“What?”

“Do you really know Aleksander Filan?”

“I’ve lived with him for a year⁠—”

“That’s not what I mean.” His brow furrows, his gaze narrowing as he gives me a once-over. It’s different from before. Colder. Calculating.

Now this?

This is the Ryker I remember. Not the seventeen-year-old I crushed on, or the twenty-two-year-old I fell for. This is the twenty-eight-year-old Alpha of the Mountainside Pack, the one who rejected me wearing an expression just like this one.

“You think he’s a good guy,” he announces at last.

Of course I do. “So what? He is a good guy.”

“He’s fooling you, Gemma.” When I begin to argue, he cuts me off. “He let me kick his ass.”

“Ryker—”

“Listen to me. I know it’s hard for you to do that, but just listen. I’m strong. I’m alpha. I know how to take down my prey, and that bloodsucker? He’s no easy kill, even if he’s already dead. He let me attack him. At that bar. With you watching. He never even once tried to fight back.”

“But why would he do that?”

Even as I’m asking him, I think I already know the answer.

Ryker’s not wrong. Aleks didn’t try to fight back. I remember thinking that was so weird at the time, that he just stood there and let Ryker slice right through him. Since he wasn’t in any danger of being killed—you can’t kill what’s dead unless Ryker went for his head—he had to know he’d recover eventually.

But would my opinion of the alpha wolf who attacked my friend?

Yeah.

I don’t want to believe it. Ryker has every reason to be making this up. I’m sure he’d love it if Aleks turned out to be just another guy willing to manipulate me to get what he wants.

Maybe it isn’t a shifter thing, but a male thing. Especially after the way he basically accused me of secretly liking Ryker’s attention…

“No. You’re trying to turn me against Aleks.” It’s the only thing that makes sense. “He was there for me when you weren’t. I might not be in love with him, but I do love him. He’s my friend. He wouldn’t do that.”

He wouldn’t.

Ryker taps his fingers against the back of the bench. When I hear the click-click-click, I know his claws are out.

He’s quiet for a moment, before he says, “Ask him about his fang.”

What for? “I already know about the fang.”

“Yeah?” It’s a dare. I know it is. Still, when he says, “Tell me about it, then,” I fall for it anyway.

“No one in Muncie knows I’m a shifter. Well, except for the first vamps that I ran into after you rejected me⁠—”

“Gretchen. She told me all about you. She’s not your biggest fan. Funny that she tried hitting on me when she hates you for being Pack, but I got her to tell me about your life here before I sent her on her way so I guess she has her uses.”

I shouldn’t be jealous at the casual way he mentions the leader of the Nightmare Trio. I should be pissed off that he grilled her about me, but I’m not. I’m jealous, and it seeps into my voice as I say drolly, “Oh? Is that what the two of you talked about over drinks?”

“Yes.”

A simple answer.

Yes.

Okay, then. I wasn’t expecting that.

Shaking my head, I tell him, “Well, Gretchen and two of her goons wanted to drain me because I was a shifter, and if it wasn’t for Aleks coming along when he did, they might’ve. Don’t know if you noticed, but shifters aren’t very popular in Muncie. So, yeah. Aleks gave me his fang to show everyone else that I was under his protection. Plus, it has a charm in it that covers my scent so no one else knows what I am. They think I’m human, and I’m okay with that.”

“You can’t mean that.”

“Why not? It’s no different than pretending to be an omega,” I toss back. “I had to do that for more than twenty-five years, Ryker. A year as a human? That’s nothing.”

“You’re an alpha,” he tells me. Like I forgot. “You should be proud of that.”

I am proud. But I’m also not going to let the truth of my ranking be a death sentence or, even worse, a jail sentence in a loveless mating.

I tap the bulge beneath my shirt. “This fang protects me so that I can hide in plain sight. For the first time in my life, I can live like an alpha. I know I’m a shifter. That’s all that counts. Let the other supes and humans think what they want. I don’t give a shit. I’m finally free.”

Ryker leans forward, clasping his hands, letting them swing in the gap left between his braced feet. Cocking his head slightly, his amber eyes shining on me like a pair of high breams, he says, “Because of that fang?”

“Yes.”

“I asked you if you knew that he loved you. Did you also know that he’s marked you?”

“Don’t start⁠—”

Ryker is suddenly so serious, there’s not a single sign remaining of that flirtatious male from before. He shifts in his seat, all focus on me—and not in the same way from before when he was appreciating my outfit.

“I’m not,” he says, cutting me off. “If anything, I’m here to finish this. He marked you without telling you, sweetheart.”

An accusation like that is rich coming from him.

“What about you? Pissing in front of Charlie’s? Breaking into my apartment? Sleeping on my balcony? Claiming me in front of everyone I know in the city? What do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m being an alpha,” he says simply. “You know that. Just like you know, whether you want to admit it to yourself or not, that I’ll never force you. I’ll never use my rank to overrule you. It’s your choice. I won’t make it for you. But by giving you that fang, making every vamp you encounter believe you belong to him, he has. It’s not a protection thing. He claimed you as his mate, and you let him.”

No.

A mate gets to choose.

Fate has a say, sure, but in the end, both mates have to choose. That’s where me and Ryker went wrong last time.

I chose him.

He chose Trish.

And here we are.

But Aleks…

“You don’t know that.”

“I don’t? I’m sure he’s told you that I met with Zakharov. The Alpha of these parasites. I told him you were my mate, that I’m here to convince you. I could already sense that other bloodsucker using his fang to mark you⁠—”

“How?”

“How what?”

“How can you sense it? It’s only supposed to work against other vamps.” Because sudden nerves have my heart racing, I cover it up with a purposeful sneer. “Something you’re not telling me, Ryker? You part vamp?”

“You’d like that, sweetheart, but nope. I’m pure alpha and…” His voice comes to a sudden close as he sees something in my sneer that I couldn’t hide. “And, shit. You really don’t know, do you? Gemma… your scent.”

“What about my scent?”

I hate that he can pull back any hint of emotion, closing off like that as if he has some kind of internal switch. He did that that night in his cabin, and he’s doing it now.

At least he actually deigns to answer me this time.

“It’s not that you don’t smell like you. I think that’s what you’ve been told, that that fang covers up your scent. And it does, to a degree. But, more than that, it’s how much you smell like him.”

I’m suddenly reminded of Saturday, when Ryker appeared in the bar, flaring his nostrils and staring at me in disbelief. I thought it was because he couldn’t pick up my scent. But if I wore Aleks’s scent instead… well, no wonder his first reaction had been to attack.

Mates wear each other’s scents so innately that it lingers. That’s all. I know that, and still I try to argue with him because I have to.

“Of course it does. I live with him.”

Ryker’s not buying what I’m trying so desperately to sell him. “Don’t play stupid, sweetheart. It doesn’t suit you. You know as well as I do what I mean. His bloody scent clings to you the way that mine will once we’re fully bonded and it’s that fucking fang’s fault.”

He has to be wrong. “No.”

“Don’t believe me, but you know I’m telling the truth. The head parasite told me what the fang really means, so maybe you’d rather take his word for it instead. Filan’s keeping you from me because he wants you for himself. And, by wearing that fang, you’re agreeing to it. You’re his fucking intended, Gemma, when you’re already mine.”

“No, I’m not.” It’s a knee-jerk reaction. I can’t help it. “Not yours. Definitely not Aleks’s. It’s just a necklace, Ryker.”

“Yeah? And who told you that? You have a sit-down with Zakharov, too?”

Me and Roman? Of course not. I’ve actually never met the leader of the Cadre. It was always Aleks who stood between us⁠—

“Aleks. Aleks told me.”

Ryker gives me another disbelieving look. “Oh. Right. I’m sorry. I forgot that the vamp who’s actively trying to steal you away from me might be a trustworthy source. Of course he wouldn’t lie to you.”

He doesn’t lie to me.

I almost snap the denial right back in Ryker’s face. I’d know. If Aleks was lying, I’d know. But, in the back of my mind, I think of how easily he avoids committing to anything that isn’t the exact truth.

He told me what the fang stood for. That doesn’t mean that he mentioned every last detail.

And… I should’ve figured that out long before now.

I think of Hailey’s jealousy whenever she’s reminded that I have Aleks’s fang hanging off of my golden necklace. And then there’s how Vincent and some of my other vamp regulars always regarded me as Aleks’s courtesy of the necklace I wore. It makes sense, doesn’t it?

The reality of my situation doesn’t keep me from arguing back anyway. Because if I don’t? Then I have to admit that he’s right, that Aleks has been lying to me this whole last year, and, yeah. There’s no going back from that.

“You don’t know Aleks. He’s a good guy. He’s been here for me this last year when you haven’t.”

Ryker grits his teeth, the same vein from Saturday bulging.

How ya doin’, Duke? Good to see you again.

Oh, wait. No, it isn’t.

“Yeah? Do me a favor, sweetheart. Why don’t you ask him about that? Your precious fucking bloodsucker. Ask him why he took care of you and I couldn’t.”

“Ryker. You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m not. And this isn’t over, either. Push all you want, but I’m not going anywhere. So, when you’re willing to talk to me… willing to listen, take that chain off. Throw it away. See what happens. I’ll be waiting for you.”

What is that supposed to mean? I’ve taken the fang necklace off more times than I can count. Usually because I snap the chain and it falls off, but still.

Then again, if I’m not wearing the necklace, I’m drinking the tea. And, as much as I tried to ignore it, it’s only when I forgot to drink the chamomile tea on Thursday, then the necklace broke on Friday, that Ryker was finally able to track me down.

But… no. It can’t be.

Aleks has spent the last year keeping me safe from the vamps in his Fang City. He hasn’t been purposely hiding me from my fated mate, has he?

Has he?

Oh, Luna.

No.

Though the stubborn side of me wants to pretend that none of what Ryker said has gotten to me, I can’t. It’s impossible. Too much of what he said makes sense for me to act like it doesn’t, and now that he’s riled up my wolf, there’s only one thing for me to do.

So, abandoning him on the bench, I take off for the apartment. I have to work hard to fight my urge to shift, though I do break out into a jog that quickly becomes a sprint before I’m bolting toward the back side of our apartment building.

I’m in no mood to take the elevator, and I head for the fire escape. If Aleks is still home, he’ll sense me heading back, his fucking fang a beacon that I took for granted for way too long.

But not any longer.

I don’t even try to offer an explanation for the way I come flying in here. I just shove open the balcony door, gaze zeroing in on Aleks. Just like the other night, he’s sitting in the living room, reading his paperback. I absently notice that he’s nearing the end of it before I put the damn book out of my head.

A moment later, he does the same. After finishing his page, Aleks puts his book to the side before glancing up at me. “Gem? Is everything okay?”

No, Aleksander. It is not.

His nostrils flare just enough to be noticeable. Of course. His sense of smell is as strong as mine, but he’ll never admit that he relies on it the same way that us shifters do.

Oh, no. He’s too civilized for that.

“You were with the wolf,” he remarks.

I don’t deny it. “Yeah. He wanted to talk to me. And, now, I want to talk to you.”

“Of course.” He waits a moment. “Is this about last night? Because I thought⁠—”

“It’s not,” I say, interrupting him. “It’s about the fang you gave me.”

“Oh.”

Oh.

I don’t like that. He sounds resigned, like he’s been expecting me to bring it up sooner or later.

“I know what you told me it means. I know what you told me it does. But, and forgive me if I’m wrong… but I just listened to Ryker try to convince me that there’s more to it that you’ve never said.”

“And you believe him?”

“I don’t want to. That’s why I’m here. I need to hear it from you. Your fang… tell me it doesn’t mean what Ryker says it does. Tell me that I haven’t been walking around all of Muncie wearing a fang that marks me as Aleksander Filan’s mate.”

“Gem. You have to understand⁠—”

I don’t have to understand shit. I just need an answer.

“It’s a simple question. Tell me. I have to know, alright?”

Aleks removes his reading glasses before pinching the bridge of his nose. A soft sigh, followed by an even softer, “It’s a vampire tradition. You wouldn’t understand, would you?”

At my angry curse, he lifts his head, meeting my stare. “You needed time to see that I was the better choice. I told you, I’ll wait for you. I… I’ve just been waiting longer than you thought.”

“Oh, come on.”

I dig beneath my shirt, grabbing the fang between two trembling fingers. Ryker was right. That sucks almost as much as how blind I was to Aleks’s intentions.

I show him the fang. “Let me get this straight. When you gave this to me, you already planned on making me your mate?”

“Gem, we don’t have to do this now. I don’t know what that wolf told you, but you can trust me. I only want what’s best for you.”

Trust him? I did. For a year, I did.

“You want me to still trust you? Then answer me. Have you always thought of me as your mate? Yes or no.” When he refuses to respond, I let my wolf rise to the surface. It echoes in my voice as I say, “If you don’t answer me, I’m leaving. I’m not going to Accalia,” I add, because I know that’s exactly what he’s thinking, “but I won’t stay here if I can’t trust you.”

“No matter the answer?”

I nod.

Aleks says something under his breath in Polish, then he straightens his shoulders. “Then, yes. I’ve thought of you as mine since you first drove past the perimeter of my city.”

His admission seems to hit me like a truck. I actually stumble, though maybe that’s just because I need to put some space between us.

“But… that was May. You didn’t tell me until fucking September that you thought you might have feelings for me that were more than friendship.”

“I had to,” he insists. “If I told you in May, you never would’ve stayed with me. You never would’ve accepted my fang.”

Would I have?

“You’re right. I wouldn’t have.”

The weight of his fang hanging off my neck is absolutely unbearable. I’m not so ticked off that I snap the chain, but I do reach behind my neck and unclasp it.

“Gem, please⁠—”

Nope. Not listening.

I shove my hand at him. The chain hangs off my pointer finger. “Take it back.”

His jaw goes so tight, I can see a muscle ticking there. “I won’t. It’s yours.”

Luna, does he have to be so stubborn? I’m the wronged one here, and he’s looking at me like I’m ripping the heart out of his damn chest.

He’s getting off lucky. With Ryker, I almost did—literally. At least, in Aleks’s case, the threat’s only a figurative one.

“Fine.” I slam the necklace down on the coffee table, biting back another curse when I hit it too hard and the glass in the center cracks upon impact before spidering. “Leave it there. The table, too. I’ll fix it when I come back.”

“You are coming back, aren’t you?”

I said I would. No matter Aleks’s answer, I said I wouldn’t leave. At least, not for good.

“Eventually.”

He rises up from the couch. “Where are you going?”

I throw up my hands. “I don’t fucking know, alright? But right now? I want to be anywhere that you’re not.”