SWNOVELS Neon Gods: Chapter 6
A night sleeping in a stranger’s bathtub has a way of bringing perspective to a situation. I have nowhere to go. No resources. No friends who won’t bow to my mother’s will. A winter didn’t seem like that long when I was still moving through my normal life. Now? Three months might as well be an eternity for all I can breach it.
My sisters would help me—Callisto would drain her trust fund to ensure I get out of Olympus unscathed—but I can’t let them get that involved. I might be leaving this city, but they aren’t and it would be cowardly in the extreme to accept their help and then whirl away, leaving them to deal with the consequences.
No, there really isn’t another option.
I have to throw myself on Hades’s mercy and convince him that we can help each other.
It doesn’t help that the soft morning light does nothing to make him look less forbidding. I’m getting a feeling like this man walks around with a little bit of midnight in his pocket. He’s certainly dressed the part in a black-on-black suit. Expensive and tasteful and very, very atmospheric when combined with the perfectly groomed beard and long hair. And those eyes. Gods, the man looks like some kind of crossroads demon designed specifically to tempt me. Considering the deal I’m about to offer, maybe that’s not a bad thing.
“Persephone.” A single eyebrow arches. “You think we can help each other.” A reminder that I’d let my voice trail off immediately after throwing that into the air between us.
I smooth back my hair, trying not to let his presence fluster me. I’ve spent the last few years rubbing elbows with powerful people, but this feels different. He feels different. “You hate Zeus.”
“I would think that’s glaringly clear.”
I ignore that. “And for some reason, Zeus is hesitant to move against you.”
Hades crosses his arms over his chest. “Zeus can pretend the rules don’t exist for him, but even he can’t stand against the entirety of the Thirteen. We have a very carefully constructed treaty. A small selection of people can cross back and forth from the upper to the lower city without consequence, but he can’t. And neither can I.”
I blink. This is all news to me. “What happens if you do?”
“War.” He shrugs as if it’s of no concern. Maybe it isn’t for him. “You crossed of your own free will, and he can’t take you back without risking a conflict that will embroil all of Olympus.” His lips quirk. “Your fiancé never does anything that might endanger his power and position, so he’ll let me do whatever I want to you to avoid that fight.”
He’s trying to scare me. Little does he realize that he’s actually reassuring me that this haphazard plan has a chance of working. “Why does everyone believe you’re a myth?”
“I stay in the lower city. It’s not my problem the upper city likes to tell tales that have nothing to do with reality.”
That’s not even close to a complete answer, but I suppose I don’t need that information right now. I can see the framework well enough without all the details. Treaty or no, Zeus has a vested interest in keeping Hades a myth. Without the third legacy role in place, the power balance lands firmly in Zeus’s favor. It was always strange to me that he effectively ignored half of Olympus, but now that I know Hades is real, it makes more sense.
I straighten my spine, holding his gaze. “Regardless, that doesn’t explain the way you spoke to his men last night. You hate him.”
Hades doesn’t blink. “He killed my parents when I was very young. Hate is too gentle a word.”
Shock nearly steals my breath. I’m not surprised to hear Zeus accused of another set of murders, exactly, but Hades speaks of his parents’ death so neutrally, as if it happened to someone else. I swallow hard. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah. People always say that.”
I’m losing him. I can see it in the way his gaze tracks around the room as if debating how quickly he can bundle me up and send me on my way. I take a deep breath and press forward. No matter what he told those men last night, it couldn’t be clearer that he has no intention of keeping me around. I can’t allow that. “Use me.”
Hades refocuses on me. “What?”
“It’s not the same thing, not even on the same level, but he claimed me and now you have me.”
Surprise colors his features. “I didn’t realize you’d resigned yourself so fully to playing the pawn in a chess match between men.”
Humiliation heats my cheeks, but I ignore it. He’s trying to provoke a reaction, and I won’t give it to him. “A pawn between you or a pawn to be used by my mother—it all amounts to the same.” I smile brightly, enjoying the way he flinches as if I’ve struck him. “I can’t go back, you see.”
“I’m not keeping you.”
No reason for that to sting. I don’t know this man, and I have no intention of being kept. It still irks that he’s so ready to dismiss me out of hand. I keep my smile firmly in place and my tone bright. “Not forever, of course. I have somewhere to be in three months’ time, but until I turn twenty-five, I can’t access my trust fund to get there.”
“You’re twenty-four.” If anything, he looks grumpier, as if my age is a personal affront.
“Yes, that is how math works.” Tone it down, Persephone. You need his help. Stop needling him. I can’t seem to help myself. Normally, I’m better at putting people at ease, which makes them more inclined to do what I want. Hades makes me want to dig in my heels and stick it to him until he squirms.
He turns to look out the window, which is when I notice that he’s replaced the side table exactly how it was before I moved it. How wonderfully anal of him. It doesn’t line up in the least with the boogeyman of Olympus. That man would have kicked down the door and dragged me out by my hair. He’d be only too happy to take me up on my offer instead of looking at the open bathroom door like I’ve left my wits behind me in the tub.
By the time he turns back to me, I have my placid, happy expression firmly in place. Hades glowers. “You want to stay here for three months.”
“In fact, I do. My birthday is April sixteenth. I’ll be out of your hair the day after. I’ll be out of everyone’s hair.”
“What does that mean?”
“Once my trust fund is in my hands, I’m bribing someone to get me out of Olympus. The details aren’t important; the fact that I’m leaving is.”
He narrows his eyes. “Leaving the city isn’t that easy.”
“Neither is crossing the River Styx, but I managed that last night.”
He finally stops glaring and studies me. “What a pale revenge you sketch out. Why should I care what you do? As you said, you won’t go back to Zeus and your mother, and I’m the one who took you from him. Whether or not I keep you here, whether you leave now or in three months, it makes no difference to me.”
He’s right, and I hate that he’s right. Zeus already knows I’m here, which means Hades effectively has me over a barrel. I stand carefully, muscling down my flinch at the aching pain putting weight on my feet causes. From his narrowed eyes, he sees it regardless, and he doesn’t like it. No matter how cold this man pretends to be, if he was really that cold, he wouldn’t have sat me in his kitchen and bandaged my feet, wouldn’t have wrapped blankets around me to ensure I warmed up. He wouldn’t be fighting himself in order not to shove me back onto the bed to keep me from hurting myself.
I clasp my hands in front of me to prevent myself from fidgeting. “What if you twisted the knife, so to speak?”
He’s watching me so closely, I have the hysterical thought that this must be how a fox feels before the hounds are loosed. If I run, would he chase me? I can’t be certain, and because I can’t be certain, my heart picks up its rhythm in my chest.
Finally, Hades says, “I’m listening.”
“Keep me for the rest of the winter. And all that that entails.”
“Don’t be vague now, Persephone. Spell out what you’re offering, in detail.”
My face must be crimson, but I don’t let my smile falter. “If he thinks I chose you over him, it will drive him mad.” When Hades continues to wait, I swallow hard. “You live in the lower city, but surely you know how it works across the river. My perceived value is directly tied to my image. Among the other things, there’s a reason you haven’t seen me publicly dating anyone since my mother became Demeter.” In hindsight, I intensely regret submitting to my mother’s meddling in that regard. I thought it easier to not make waves as she cultivated a certain reputation for me and my sisters; I had no idea she’d use that same reputation to sell me to Zeus.
“Zeus is notorious for not wanting what he considers tarnished goods.” I take a deep breath. “So…tarnish me.”
Hades finally smiles and, good gods, it’s like being hit by a laser beam. Heat strong enough to make my fingertips tingle and curl my toes. I stare up at him, caught in the intensity of those dark eyes. And then he’s shaking his head, smothering the rush of strangeness through my body. “No.”
“What do you mean, no?”
“I’m aware that you’ve likely not heard the word often in your privileged life, so I’ll spell it out for you. No. Nein. Nyet. Non. Absolutely not.”
Irritation rises. It’s a very good plan, especially when I had such short notice to come up with it. “Why not?”
For a moment, I think he won’t answer me. Finally, Hades shakes his head. “Zeus isn’t stupid.”
“I suppose that’s a fair assumption.” One doesn’t gain and keep power in Olympus without some level of intelligence, even if they are in a legacy role. “What’s your point?”
“Even if one takes Hermes out of the equation, he has spies in my territory the same way I have spies in his. No surface-level charade will fool him. It will take one report to prove it all to be a sham, which will entirely defeat the purpose of said sham.”
If he’s correct, my plan won’t work. How frustrating. Now it’s my turn to cross my arms over my chest, though I refuse to glare out of principle. “Then we do it for real.”
Hades’s slow blink is a special kind of reward. “You’re out of your mind.”
“Hardly. I’m a woman with a plan. Learn and adapt, Hades.” My breezy voice doesn’t belie the way my heart is racing so hard that it’s leaving me a bit dizzy. I can’t believe I’m offering this, can’t believe I’d be this impulsive, but the words just keep pouring out of my mouth. “You’re attractive enough in a broody sort of way. Even if I’m not your type, I’m sure you can close your eyes and think of England or whatever it is the boogeyman does when he engages in carnal activities.”
“Carnal activities.” I don’t think he’s taken a breath in the last sixty seconds. “Are you a virgin, Persephone?”
I scrunch up my nose. “That’s not really your business. Why do you ask?”
“Because only a virgin would call sex ‘carnal activities.’”
Ah, that’s what’s holding him up. I shouldn’t enjoy poking this man so much, but despite what I told him earlier, I honestly don’t think he’ll hurt me. My skin doesn’t try to crawl off my body every time I’m in a room with him, which is a marked improvement from Zeus and some of the other people who frequent that social circle. More, Hades might growl and snap and attempt to slap me down verbally, but he keeps sneaking glances at my feet as if it physically pains him that I’m standing on them. He’s irritating, but he’s not going to hurt me if he’s that concerned with my current level of comfort.
I give him a faintly pitying look. “Hades, regardless of the ridiculous importance the upper city puts on virginity, there are plenty of activities that can be termed ‘carnal’ that don’t involve penis-in-vagina sex. Really, I would think you’d know that already.”
His lips twitch, but he manages to get control of himself before actually smiling. Then he’s back to glowering at me. “You’re so eager to sell your virginity for your safety.”
I roll my eyes. “Please. Whatever fiction my mother sold to Zeus, I’m not a virgin, so if that’s what’s having your head in danger of exploding, you can let it go. It’s fine.”
If anything, he glares harder. “That doesn’t make your offered bargain more attractive.”
Oh, this is just ridiculous. I sigh, letting my exasperation through. “Silly me for thinking that you’re among the percentage of the human population that doesn’t worship at the altar of the hymen.”
He curses, looking like he wants to drag his hands over his face. “That is not what I meant.”
“It’s what you said.”
“You’re twisting my words.”
“Am I?” I’m already well past my frustration limit with this conversation. I’m usually better at selling people on my ideas than this. “What is the problem, Hades? We have similar interests at this point. You want to punish Zeus for the harm he’s caused you. I want to ensure his plans to marry me die a quick and efficient death. Ensuring that he believes we’re fucking on every available surface until you’re imprinted on my skin accomplishes both of these goals. He won’t touch me with a ten-foot pole, and he’ll never be able to get over the fact that it was you who ‘ruined’ me.”
Still he doesn’t say anything. I sigh again. “Is it because you think you’d be coercing me? You’re not. If I didn’t want to have sex with you, I wouldn’t offer.”
His shock is so delicious, I can almost taste it. Like the rest of Olympus, this man has seen the various media coverage of me and my family and made assumptions. I can’t say all of them are wrong, but I get a special delight in this interaction. I know the role my mother crafted for me among my four sisters—the sweet, sunny Persephone who always smiles as she does what she’s told.
Little do they know.
I’m not exactly lying. Yes, I don’t have much in the way of options right now, but the idea of sleeping with Hades to ruin any chances of Zeus’s ring on my finger… It appeals to a very dark, very secret part of me. I want to twist the knife, to punish Zeus for acting like I’m a piece of art up for auction instead of a person with thoughts and feelings and plans. I want him to writhe in pain around a blade of my crafting, to undermine his authority by slipping through his fingers to take up with his enemy. A small thing, perhaps, but nothing is truly small when it comes to reputation. My mother has taught me that lesson well.
Power is as much about perception as it is about the resources one has at their disposal.
“I don’t know how you pick sexual partners, but I don’t usually bargain for the privilege.” His hand twitches at his side. “Sit your ass down before you bleed all over my carpet.”
“First hardwood floors, now carpet. Hades, you are positively rabid for your floors.” After a quick internal debate, I perch on the edge of the mattress. He won’t be able to focus on a single thing I’m saying if I remain standing. I fold my hands primly on my lap. “Better?”
Hades has the same look on his face that my mother gets before she starts threatening to throw people out windows. I don’t think she’s ever actually thrown anything in a fit of anger, but the threat was good when we were children. He shakes his head slowly. “Hardly. You’re still here.”
“Ouch.” I hold his gaze. “I still don’t understand the problem. Last night you were all throat-grabbing and snarling Mine, and today you’re acting like you can’t wait to kick me to the curb. Am I just not your type?” It’s possible, though it seems a strange thing to trip him up if he really wants vengeance. I have access to a mirror. I know what I look like. Traditional beauty and all that, and that was before my mother insisted we sink a truly absurd amount of money into hair and skin care and wardrobe, though I drew the line at a nose job.
“Unless you’re more into the helpless damsel in distress? I suppose I could play the role for you if that’ll get the job done.” I look up at Hades, and I don’t bother to paint my expression with any artifice or seduction. It won’t work on him, I’m sure of it. Instead I give him a mocking smile, the tiniest bit of edge to my normally sunny self. “Do you want me, Hades? Even a little bit?”
“No.”
I blink. Maybe I imagined the heat in his gaze? If that’s the case, I’ve just been an unbelievable asshole. “Well then. I suppose this plan won’t work after all. Apologies.” I wrap up my disappointment in a small box and shove it deep.
It was a good plan, and I’m self-aware enough to know that I would very much like to have a fling with this broody, handsome man in addition to accomplishing my other goals. Oh well. There’s another path forward. I just need to figure out the steps to get there. As much as I don’t want to involve my sisters further, between the four of us, we should be able to figure out how to hide me for the next few months.
I push to my feet, mind already a thousand miles away. I might have to take a loan from Callisto, but I’ll be sure to pay her back with interest. I don’t know if the passage I’ve been promised will be available early, but I suppose if I throw enough money at the problem, I can find a way. I’ll just have to make sure I don’t think too hard about how much of my trust fund I’ll be eating up in the process once I repay Callisto.
“Persephone.”
I stop short before I run into Hades’s chest and look up at him. He isn’t a particularly large man, but he feels bigger up close, like his shadow looms larger than the man himself. We’re close enough that a careless move would press my chest to his. It’s a terrible idea. He just told me he doesn’t want me, and I may be stubborn to a fault, but I know how to accept a rejection.
I start to take a step back, but he catches my elbows, holding me in place. Holding me almost close enough to be an embrace. His dark eyes give me absolutely nothing, which shouldn’t be thrilling. It truly shouldn’t. Watching this man’s control crack in real time is a desire I can’t afford to have.
That doesn’t stop me from taking a particularly deep inhale, and it certainly doesn’t quell the surge of victory when his attention drops to the way my breasts press against the thin fabric of my dress. His jaw flexes beneath his perfectly groomed beard. “I’m not in the habit of bargaining for sex.”
“Yes, you said that.” My voice is too breathy to pass as unaffected, but I can’t help it. He’s so overwhelming, the kind of presence an unwary partner could get lost in. They might not even mind it. But I am not unwary. I know exactly what I’m getting myself into. I hope.
“I suppose there’s a first time for everything,” he murmurs. Convincing himself or convincing me? I could tell him the latter is completely unnecessary, but I keep my mouth shut. Hades finally focuses on me. “If I agree to this, you’re mine for the next three months.”
Yes. I barely manage to damper my enthusiasm. “That sounds like agreeing to more than sex.”
“It is. I’ll protect you. We’ll play out the narrative you want. You’ll belong to me. You’ll obey.” His fingers tighten ever so briefly on my elbows, like he’s fighting not to haul me against him. “We act out every depraved thing I want to do to you. In public.” At my confused look, he clarifies. “Zeus knows that I engage in public sex on occasion. That’s what you’re agreeing to.”
Temper your reaction, Persephone. Let him play the big, bad wolf he’s so determined to cast himself as. I lick my lips and give him wide eyes. I’ve never had sex in public, not really, but I can’t say I’m opposed to the idea. It’s startlingly hot. “I’ll just have to grin and bear it, then.”
“You shouldn’t.”
Oh, he is too delicious. I can’t help leaning a little forward, pulled by the sheer gravitational force he exudes. “I agree to your terms, Hades. Protected by you, belonging to you, and having depraved public sex with you, oh my.” I should let it stop there, but I’ve never been that good at denying myself what I want. “I suppose we should seal our bargain with a kiss. That’s the traditional way of things.”
“Is it.” His inflection makes the words less question and more mocking absolute. He’s so cold, he might freeze me down to my very core. It should scare me. Every partner I’ve had to date has been the very opposite of Hades—people willing to take what I give and ask no questions, require no further commitments from me. My mother’s reputation ensured that their desire for me didn’t outweigh their fear of her, so they all went out of their way to keep our relationship a secret. At first sneaking around was fun. Later, it became exhausting. But it was safe, as safe as someone can be as Demeter’s daughter while living in Olympus.
Hades is not safe. He’s so far from safe, I should be rethinking this bargain before it’s even begun. I can tell myself I have no choice, but it’s not the truth. I want this with every shadowy part of my soul that I work so hard to keep locked down. There’s no room in the public narrative of the sweet, sunny, biddable woman for the things I find myself craving in the dark of night. Things I’m suddenly sure Hades is capable of giving me.
And then his mouth is on mine and I’m not sure of anything at all.