My Darling Jane: Chapter 28
Present . . .
I’m halfway through a cracker as I finish ringing up a customer. Glancing at the clock, I decide it’s time. “Babs, I’m heading out to Carson’s. Got to drum up some business,” I say, wiping my hands on a napkin. “Can you lock up?”
She rolls her eyes. “Not the outfit again.”
I chuckle, heading toward my office. “You know it’s brought us clients. And those clients brought more clients.”
“Don’t remind me,” she grumbles, but I can tell she’s fighting a smile.
In my office, I change into the long white toga, securing the angel wings and adjusting the quiver on my back. I add a swipe of red lipstick.
Stepping into Carson’s, I scan the room, getting a few curious glances, but the regulars have gotten used to me. I’ve been here several times, and it’s gotten me at least five clients. The bartender even sends up a wave and a smile as he calls my name. I wave back.
Then I see him—a young man in a suit. Maybe around my age, he’s alone at the bar with a stark-white napkin tied around his neck like a makeshift bib, but it’s the cheese smeared on his shirt cuffs that really catches my attention.
In a way, he reminds me of Londyn, who always gets food everywhere but her mouth. I head over, my wings fluttering slightly with each step.
I slide onto the stool beside him. “The bib is a good move, but your cuffs didn’t get the memo,” I say, pointing out the cheese stains with a grin.
He looks down, then groans. “Ugh. Dining solo has its pitfalls.”
“I’m Jane,” I say as I extend my hand, not missing the firm grip of his handshake. “I run a matchmaking service, hence the outfit. Watching you with those cheese fries reminds me of my daughter. Couldn’t help but say hi.”
“Alexi. And this,” he gestures to his bib, “isn’t my usual charm. It’s been a long-ass day.”
I glance at the line of empty beer bottles crowding his space.
“Looks like you’re having a rough time?”
He sighs, picking at the remains of his cheese fries. “Is it that obvious? Yeah, just ended things with someone at work.”
I tsk. “Work and personal life—tricky.”
“Especially when you’re gay and trying to navigate a corporate maze.”
Ahhh.
“Our service is inclusive. My friend Brody helps with our LGBTQ+ clients.”
Alexi’s gaze softens. “That’s good, but I’m not sure I’m ready to date. How about joining me for a drink? You seem interesting, and I need a distraction.”
I laugh. “Sure. Sprite for me,” I say.
He nods to the bartender, and we settle into an easy conversation.
Suddenly, the door to Carson’s swings open with a bit of a flourish, drawing the attention of everyone in the bar. My breath catches in my throat as Jasper walks in. He’s just as stunning as I remember—tall, with that effortlessly confident stride, his hair mussed as if he’s just rolled out of bed, but somehow it looks gorgeous. He’s wearing a fitted T-shirt that accentuates his broad shoulders and jeans that cling to the muscles in his thighs. His gaze sweeps the room, and it feels like time slows down.
My heart skips a beat, then another, as if it’s forgotten how to keep a steady rhythm. It’s only been ten days since I saw him—days of trying to convince myself that I’m okay.
But seeing him now, all those carefully constructed walls crumble.
I’ve missed him—his smile, his laugh, the way “angel” sounds when he says it.
He hasn’t spotted me yet, his eyes scanning the crowd. I’m suddenly acutely aware that I should have washed my hair this morning and put on a full face of makeup. A part of me wants to hide, but another part is rooted to the spot, unable to look away.
When his gaze finally lands on me, there’s a flicker of surprise, then a warmth that spreads across his face, lighting up his eyes in a way that sends a familiar jolt through me.
It’s a look that says he’s genuinely happy, and my heart feels like it’s about to burst.
I gasp, a sound lost in the bar. It’s ridiculous, really, how just seeing him can make me feel like this.
For a moment, there’s no one else in the room but Jasper and me. The noise of the bar fades, and all I feel is this yearning that I’ve bottled up since he left the hospital.
And then he starts to walk toward me.
“Is that Jasper Jannich?” Alexi asks, his tone hushed.
“Yes. But please pretend you don’t know him. His ego is so big already . . . ,” I say, and Alexi smirks.
“He deserves to have an ego. He’s hot.”
“And straight.”
Alexi chuckles. “He’s yours, I guess. Lucky girl.”
I chew on my bottom lip, watching every move Jasper makes as he walks closer to us. The way his blue eyes won’t leave my face.
I glance away and look at Alexi. “Not so lucky. I think he knows something is up.”
Alexi takes a sip of beer. “Knows what? Wait. He isn’t coming to kick my ass, is he?”
“Maybe.” My thoughts are scattered. “He’s supposed to be at football camp, but he’s here. Which means something has brought him here, which means . . .”
“Hey, tell him we aren’t together, yeah? I don’t want to die in this bar. It stinks. The fries aren’t even that great. I only stopped here on a whim.”
He shifts uncomfortably, eyeing Jasper’s towering frame.
But Jasper doesn’t spare him a glance. His eyes are stormy, yes, but not with anger. He looks vulnerable. Maybe a little scared.
I turn on my stool to face him as he gets to me, but before I can speak, he reaches for me, his hands gentle as he pulls me closer, then leans down and kisses me, a touch filled with tenderness.
When he finally pulls back, his gaze searches mine. “Jane Darling,” he starts, then swallows. “This might sound crazy, but I had this dream about us, camping, with my family and Londyn . . . and a baby.” He pauses, his thumb brushing my lip lightly. “I know it sounds insane, but it felt like a glimpse into the future. With you.”
His hands frame my face as if I’m something precious. “I saw what could be, and it’s everything.”
My heart skips a beat. “What are you—” I start, but he silences me with a soft kiss.
“I know we’ve both been scared,” he says, pulling back to look into my eyes. “But after that dream, I can’t pretend. I don’t want to. I need you, Jane. More than I’ve ever needed anything.”
His voice is thick. “Seeing my bio mom again, it brought everything back. The feeling of being unwanted and left behind.” He leans in, his forehead resting against mine, sharing his vulnerability. “I hesitated at the hospital when you needed space. I didn’t stay and fight for us. I’m so sorry.”
No, he shouldn’t be sorry for that. I pushed him away.
His hands slide down to my shoulders. “I’m a mess, Jane. I’ve spent my life hesitating and not saying what I should when it comes to getting serious with women.” His fingers gently squeeze, a silent plea for understanding.
I glance at Alexi. His mouth is open as he listens in rapt attention. I think his eyes shine a little.
I notice that even the bartender and a few patrons are silent as they listen.
Jasper takes a deep breath, and I focus back on him.
“After my mom left me at the truck stop, I ended up in foster care for six months. Like I told you before, I didn’t speak for three months. I had no words. Nothing,” he tells me. “I was in this limbo, hoping she’d come back for me. But she never did.”
He pauses, swallowing hard, his gaze locked on me. “Then, my adoptive parents found me. They were everything I’d ever dreamed of, loving, caring, stable. But I was always afraid it would all just disappear. I used to get up in the early hours of the morning and wander around the house to make sure they hadn’t left me.”
My throat tightens with emotion.
“I used to hold my mom’s hand all the time, up until I was nearly fourteen. I guess I thought if I held on tight enough, I could make safety last.”
His lashes flutter, then open again. “On my tenth birthday, I secretly hoped my real mom would show up. It had been five years, and it felt like a milestone, you know, like she might come and tell me she made a mistake. When she didn’t, something inside me just died. She was my real mom, my blood, but she didn’t want me. Some holes can’t be filled, no matter how much love you get from other people, and I know you get that, you do.”
His voice softens. “You and Londyn are what I’ve been missing. That dream . . . it wasn’t just a dream.” He pauses. “I love you, Jane.”
I suck in a sharp breath.
He gives me a smirk as he laughs sheepishly. “I know it’s sudden, and I’ve been an idiot, but I’m here now. I’m back because I can’t be without you. I want to love you forever, be everything you and Londyn need.”
“Jasper,” I say, my own voice trembling. “I need to tell you something—”
“You never took that Plan B,” he says.
I shake my head, amazed that he knows. “No.”
“Oh, shit, it’s getting good now,” Alexi says under his breath, but neither of us seems to care.
“Do you have something to tell me?” Jasper asks.
“I’m pregnant,” I say, tears forming in my eyes. “From the first time we were together.”
His eyes widen, a myriad of emotions flickering across his face.
“Pregnant?” he says in a low voice full of amazement. “Were you ever going to tell me?”
“Of course I would. It’s yours. I just needed to think about it.”
Silence, thick and heavy, stretches between us. I steal a glance at him, trying to gauge his reaction.
His throat moves as he swallows. “Wow. That’s why you were sick at the hospital. It all makes sense now. I won’t pretend I’m not shocked. But I care about you, more than I’ve ever cared about anyone. And this child, it’s part of you. Of us.”
“It’s a lot to take on,” I say, giving him an out.
He takes a step back and runs a hand through his hair. “Okay, don’t move. Just give me a second.”
And just like that, he’s walking away and leaving me sitting there on the barstool.
There’s silence in the bar as everyone watches him leave.
He paces outside the bar. Through the window, I see that his movements are erratic. He’s talking to himself, his hands gesturing in the air. He just poured his heart out, confessed his love . . .
What is he doing now?
I consider following him, but something holds me back. This is his moment to process. The revelation of the pregnancy is huge, and even though his declaration of love was everything, I think he’s grappling with the reality.
He stops pacing for a moment, looks up at the night sky as if he’s seeking answers from the stars.
Then, he’s on the move again, pacing.
I tap my fingers on the bar, anxiety building.
This waiting is torture, but I understand the need for a moment to breathe and think. I’ve been there, trying to find my footing when life throws a surprise my way.
Alexi places a comforting hand on my shoulder. “He’ll come back,” he says. “He just needs a minute. Also, if you have a card, I’ll take it now. Find me somebody like Jasper, yeah?”
I nod, not really listening.
Jasper’s reaction is understandable, but it doesn’t make it any easier to watch.
Finally, he stops pacing. He stands still, takes a deep breath, and then turns back toward the bar. His steps are more decisive now, as if he’s come to some sort of conclusion.
As he reenters the bar, his eyes find mine immediately. He walks up to me, takes my hands in his, and kneels down in front of me, right there in the middle of the bar.
“Jasper!”
“Jane,” he says, his voice steady, “I won’t pretend I’m not scared. This is huge. But I meant what I said. I love you, and I never want to be away from you again like I have been. I want to be a part of your life every single day. I never want to see you walk away from me. I never want to walk away from you. I need you and Londyn and this baby. I need it more than anything. I’m crazy about you.”
Tears well up in my eyes as I listen to him. This is all I’ve ever wanted to hear from a man who loves me.
“Yes,” I say, squeezing his hands. “I want that too.”
“Is this a marriage proposal?” Alexi asks.
Jasper looks around the room, seeming to become aware of the others’ rapt attention. “Yes.”
He stands up and pulls me into a tight embrace. I feel my feet lift off the floor as he spins me around. The bar erupts in cheers and claps from the people who’ve been watching the drama unfold.
I lean into Jasper, feeling his heart beat in time with mine. I realize that no matter what challenges or surprises lie ahead, we’ll face them together. Because that’s what families do.
“Tell me you love me, Jane. I need to hear it,” he says in my ear. “I’m a needy guy. I’m always going to need the words, and you haven’t said them.”
I lean back and gaze up at him.
I get why I’ve fallen for Jasper. It probably happened slowly, little interactions since the moment we met at the bookstore.
His way of being gentle without losing his masculinity. He listens, really listens, making me feel like I’m the only person in the world. He picks up on the little stuff, the things I throw out without thinking, and remembers them. His sunshiny charm.
He calls me “angel.” He likes my scowl. He thinks I’m funny.
Just now when he opened up to me in front of all these people, some who probably recorded it, he wasn’t afraid to show people who he is.
And the spark between us, it’s been there from the start, growing stronger every day.
What I love most about Jasper is that he’s Jasper. I love his ego, his sunshine, his charming grin, even his smirky grin. I love his depth underneath that. His soul.
I gaze into his blue eyes. “I love you. Because you are you. Because we’re meant to be. You are a surprise I never saw coming, and it’s the best one yet.”
He gives me a blinding smile, one that could light up a room. “We’re a match, angel. I knew it from the moment I asked you out in this very bar and you told me no. I’m never letting you go.”
We stand there, hands clasped, and everything feels absolutely right.