SWNOVELS Chapter 33
OLLIE VB
@RomeoCosta, your mom just walked out of Bougie Baby with your wife in tow and approximately five hundred bags.
Anything you want to tell us?
ROMEO COSTA
Yes: mind your own business.
ZACH SUN
What were you doing in that shop, @OllievB?
Anything YOU want to tell US?
OLLIE VB
I’ll have you know Bougie Baby is right next to my shooting range.
ROMEO COSTA
Speaking of shooting range…
ZACH SUN
Don’t even go there.
That’s double homicide.
Fifty years in the slammer.
Just giving you the facts.
ROMEO COSTA
She is not pregnant. The only thing she is full of starts with an S and ends with a T.
OLLIE VB
Sexiest Alive is actually just the title People Magazine has given me.
My real name is Oliver.
ROMEO COSTA
And your real chronological age is five.
ZACH SUN
Strengthening ties with her MIL.
Smart move.
ROMEO COSTA
Unfortunately, she is not as dim as I pegged her to be.
OLLIE VB
Admit it, Costa.
You miscalculated.
You wanted dumb and dumber and got the best and the brightest.
Alexa, play American Idiot.
ZACH SUN
Ollie is right.
You thought she’d be your plaything. In reality, you have more control over the weather.
ROMEO COSTA
Her entire personality is being a toddler.
She will tire herself out, eventually.
ZACH SUN
Will she?
At this point, we’re all living in a simulation, and Detroit Townsend has admin access.
You cannot convince me otherwise.
ROMEO COSTA
Detroit COSTA.