SWNOVELS Miss Belief: Chapter 5
After leaving Reid’s office, I sat at my desk stunned. He’d asked me to be his fake girlfriend, and I’d turned him down. God, just imagining the excuse to hold his hand and kiss him was giving me heart palpitations. How could I become a fake girlfriend with a man I’d dreamed about for a whole year? There’s no way I could pull it off. And even if I could, it would most likely turn into a heartbreak train wreck.
Or would it?
Could I fake it while keeping my true feelings to myself? Here I’d been waiting for an opportunity where he could see me as more than a coworker. What if this was it? What if this was the chance to take our relationship from friendly coworkers to more? But wasn’t it too soon after his breakup?
Yes. Undoubtedly he wasn’t ready for another relationship given how down he was about the end of his last one.
By the time I’d left the office for the night, I was still obsessing over it. Evaluating the pros and cons of becoming his fake girlfriend when I had real feelings.
An hour later, I had changed into my comfy clothes and was sitting in the lonely living room of my two-bedroom apartment with the walls painted an awful shade of corporate-housing beige. But my smile came easily when a familiar FaceTime number flashed up on my cell phone.
My sister’s beautiful face came into focus when I hit the accept button. Whereas the sun was enemy number one on my fair skin, it turned Tory into a beach goddess with her golden glow.
“Hi, Tory,” I greeted.
“Hi. Sorry, I meant to call you this weekend, but time got away from me. You free to say hello to Penelope?”
With the eleven-hour time difference between here and Los Angeles, and both of us working weekend nights, it was difficult to connect with home. But I always had time to say hello to my adorable niece. “Of course. I’m just home from work. Put her on.”
“Hi, Aunty T.”
My grin went big at Penelope’s adorable face. Blue eyes, rosy cheeks, and a smile for days. I might be biased, but I thought my niece was the prettiest little girl on the planet. “Hi, Penny. How are you?”
“Good, but my hair isn’t growing back yet.”
My breath stuck in my throat. What did you say to a four-year-old who’d gone through a round of treatment for leukemia, and who’d lost all her hair as a result? “It’ll take some time, but once it does grow back, it’ll be beautiful.”
“Mama says the same thing. When it gets longer, will you braid it? Like a princess?”
“Anything for you.” Tears formed at the thought. I didn’t grow up with religion, but since her diagnosis, I’d prayed for her recovery, and sincerely hoped this was the end of her treatments. As of last week, she was officially in remission, but the next few months were critical in testing to confirm the chemo had worked, and the cancer didn’t return. I could only hope a God who’d never paid much attention to my family would finally take notice and grant this one prayer to keep her in remission.
“It’ll be long and blond like your mama’s hair.”
“I hope it grows back red like yours.”
Funny how some kids could be so sweet while others could be so mean. My fiery red hair had meant torture through most of my adolescence. I could only assume that since both my mother and Tory had blond hair, my hair color had come from my father. Now that we were adults and thanks to a DNA test, my sister and I knew we didn’t share that side of the gene pool.
“Any color of hair would be pretty on you.”
“What funny shirt are you wearing today?” she asked in her sweet little, childlike voice.
Among my few prized possessions was a collection of funny, sarcastic, and sometimes inappropriate T-shirts. Thankfully, the one I currently wore was suitable for my niece. It was one of my favorites. I moved it into the picture. “It says, ‘Cute But Psycho.’”
She shrugged, either not getting it or not thinking it was funny. Tough crowd. “Okay. I’m gonna go watch Frozen 2. Here’s Mama. Love you. Bye.”
I adored the way she switched tasks on a whim, but was left viewing the ceiling as she must’ve set the phone down on something. “Love you too. Hello?”
Tory’s face came into view as she picked up the phone. Sometimes it was hard to remember she was the older sister considering how youthful she looked, despite her tired eyes. “I’m here. Work going okay? Your mopey boss still mopey? Or wait— You said he morphed into dick territory last time we talked, yeah?”
Victoria knew all about my crush on Reid, but I wasn’t about to share the details of today’s intervention, not when I needed her advice on something entirely different. “It may be turning around. He has a wedding in a couple weeks where he’ll see the ex, and when I told him he should consider taking a date, he asked if maybe I’d go.”
Her brows went sky high. “What did you say?”
I exhaled my frustration, still upset about how I’d reacted. “I was in shock, so I sort of made excuses, and he apologized and told me to never mind.”
“What do you want to do? Be honest.”
As if I’d ever lie to my sister. She was a single mom who’d been through a parent’s worst nightmare with her child battling cancer. There was no hiding my bullshit from her. I hadn’t been able to do so when I was a kid, a teenager, or even now; nor was there any doubt she would always be on my side.
“Of course I want to do it. But I don’t think he’s over his ex-fiancée by a long shot. He revealed they’ve broken up multiple times, and all his friends and family will be expecting them to get back together.”
“But I thought his ex sucked his older brother’s dick.”
Like me, Tory didn’t have much of a filter. A hard life did that to you. It took away your ability to sugarcoat things. “Yes, and he says he doesn’t want her back.”
“You still in love with him?”
My face burned at her question. “I’m not in love with him. It’s a silly crush.”
One where I knew way too much information about him to be considered healthy, but I wasn’t in love with him. Pfft.
Jesus, did I really just do a mental pfft?
Her smirk was annoyingly perceptive. “In that case, then, you should pretend to be his girlfriend and get over it.”
“What do you mean get over it?”
“Crushes are based on infatuation. Infatuation is based on not really knowing someone. When he was engaged, he was off-limits, making it easy to keep things surface level and believe it couldn’t happen. So I’d argue if you get to know him better now, and there’s no longer the unattainable factor, you may be able to get over this crush. Demystify him and truly get to know him. Knock him off the pedestal you put him on and bring him down to the level of the rest of us mortals. That is, if you want to.”
I’d had a crush on Reid for so long it was hard to remember not being obsessed with him. But what if getting to know him better made him more appealing? What if my crush ended up turning into more?
“I don’t want to get hurt,” I admitted.
She sighed. “If you’re afraid you may get hurt, then it means your feelings are deeper than a crush, and you have to ask whether it’s worth the risk. As you said, it doesn’t sound like he’s over his ex, not by a long shot.”
Even if he was over his relationship, I was nowhere near Reid’s type, judging by his ex. If his taste in women was a cheese, his ex was brie while I was Cheez Whiz.
“Where is the wedding?”
“Turks and Caicos. He offered to fly me there for the weekend and then out to LA to see you afterwards if I wanted.”
“Not to sway your decision, but we’d love to see you. We have to be careful of what Penelope is exposed to, but a nice remission celebration at home with a movie marathon and her favorite foods would be amazing.”
Yes. It would. We both knew I couldn’t afford the thousands of dollars a plane ticket would cost to come see her on my own. I reasoned if I was doing Reid the favor of accompanying him to the wedding, he could fly me out to California. My sister and I were prideful when it came to accepting charity, but this was more of an exchange of favors.
“I’ll talk to him more about it tomorrow. But it would be nice to come home and visit. When is Penny’s next doctor’s appointment?”
She took the topic switch in stride. “In two weeks, she follows up with more blood tests. She’s starting to get her energy back, so I’m optimistic it’ll go well. Also, I have an interview on Friday. A real one. Hoping I can find a job with medical insurance.”
God, I hoped so too because fighting cancer without insurance had been an absolute nightmare. It wasn’t as if Tory hadn’t done all she could to find a job with medical benefits, but starting work at a new company while taking time off for chemo appointments for a sick child had proved impossible. It was too bad my niece couldn’t be on my medical insurance, but unfortunately, it didn’t work that way.
“What’s the job interview for?”
“An assistant position at a tech firm. If I can get a real job, I’m hoping to get a better apartment too.”
They were in South Los Angeles, not in the best neighborhood. Someday we’d have a different life. One where I moved back and braided Penelope’s newly grown hair, where we took her to a safe neighborhood park, and where we both didn’t have to take off our clothes for strangers in order to fund cancer treatment for a child.
Someday.
“Did you quit your other job at the restaurant yet?”
I exhaled a large breath, not wanting to get into that. My “job” at the restaurant was a cover for stripping and doing so in a country where such activity was highly illegal. We couldn’t mention it, not even over the phone. “Not yet. We can use the extra income to pay down the debt.”
She shook her head, the annoyance obvious on her face over the ongoing argument between us. “I’ve got it covered, Teag. I mean it. Take your weekends off. You deserve it.”
I was torn. On the one hand, I desperately wanted to quit stripping, especially given the risk here in the UAE, but on the other hand, the extra money would help us pay off the remaining medical debt and go toward getting a new apartment in a better neighborhood.
“We can put the money toward a new place.”
One of the reasons I’d stayed past my one-year contract with Delmont Security was for the pay. The company covered my housing, and I was otherwise able to keep my costs low while making a decent wage. But if I was being truthful with myself, I wasn’t sure I was ready to go home yet. I’d gotten a taste of adventure here in Dubai, and I selfishly didn’t know if I was ready for it to end.
“I will sleep much better once you give notice, so please consider it. Good luck with your boss.”
I’d need it. “Thanks. I’ll be sending you lots of good vibes for your interview. Love you, sis.”
She gave me one of her rare, genuine smiles. “Thanks. Love you too, Teag. Bye.”
I hung up and sighed. For a girl who’d successfully avoided feelings for most of my life, it shouldn’t be an issue to pretend I didn’t have any when it came to Reid Maxwell and become his fake girlfriend. Right?
The next morning I was a ball of nerves when I knocked on my boss’s office door. I’d made up my mind. He wanted a fake girlfriend, and I was about to offer to play the part.
“Come in,” came his deep-timbred voice.
He glanced up when I entered but then frowned when his phone rang. “Sorry, this will only take a moment if you don’t mind waiting?”
“I don’t mind.”
It gave me a chance to observe him. Dammit. A crush consisted of pleasure, anxiety, hope, and hopelessness all at once. It was all-consuming, and not at all conducive to becoming his fake girlfriend. Then again, wouldn’t it be nice to sit here without all of those feelings?
After hanging up his work call, he flashed me an apologetic smile. “Sorry to keep you waiting. What’s up?”
I rubbed my palms against my black trousers. “Oh, um, you know, I thought I’d go with you to the wedding.”
His brows jumped up. “No, no, like I said yesterday, I shouldn’t have asked you to come with me.”
“You’re not asking. I’m offering.”
An adorable blush stained his cheeks. “Why?”
Because I hoped to test my feelings for him. Either I’d get over my crush by getting to know him better, or I’d fall harder and get hurt. Win-win, right?
“First, I want to help you. Secondly, it would be a nice mini-vacation, and lastly, I intend to take you up on your offer to fly me to see my sister afterwards.”
He seemed to contemplate. “You’re not doing it because you feel sorry for my mopey ass?”
In reality, he had a fine ass, one I’d checked out more times than I could count. “No, although you should know I won’t stand for any more mope. My fake boyfriends are quite happy to be with me.”
He chuckled. “If I can’t make a fake girlfriend fake happy, then what hope is there for me?”
“Exactly. So, how do you want to start stuff?”
“If you were serious about needing a gym buddy, then I’ll take you up on the offer. You prefer mornings or evenings, after work?”
Seeing Reid in workout attire would be a treat. “As much as I hate mornings, I’d prefer to get a workout out of the way first thing.”
“Tomorrow morning it is. I go to Eclipse a couple blocks away. Aiden introduced me to it.”
It was a luxury gym, one way out of my salary band. “I’m not sure I’m an Eclipse kind of girl.”
“Come on. I’ll get you a pass. Since we’ll have to pretend we’ve been dating, we can, uh, learn more about each other in the process.”
My heart beat faster at the thought of spending time with him outside of work. “Okay. Yeah, we probably have a lot to learn in a short period.” I might already have discovered a lot from stalking him over the last few months, but the truth was I didn’t know what made Reid tick. I was looking forward to discovering more.