Chapter 24
My thoughts churn as I digest the final paragraph of Maverick’s paper. The topic focuses on whether college athletes should be paid. Despite the punctuation and grammatical errors, it’s both interesting and informative. There are some paragraphs that are short and abrasively to the point. They need to be expanded with more supporting examples and evidence to back up the ideas. Then there are others that seem to ramble and meander before finally coming to a close. It’s almost like he forgot the main point he was trying to get across to the reader. Better organization of his thoughts would also help.
Those are all correctable problems we can work on.
What struck me most is that reading Maverick’s paper reminded me of all the times I helped my brother with his homework in high school. There are the same patterns of errors with punctuation, grammar, and organization that lead me to believe Maverick might have the same issue.
Dyslexia.
I’m certainly not an expert, and I could be wrong.
That’s what I’m most afraid of.
As I gather my thoughts, I peek at the hockey player, only to find him watching me intently.
The easy confidence of before is notably absent from his expression. In its place is a look of tension.
It only reinforces my hunch.
If he’s anything like River, it’s a sensitive topic.
My brother struggled all through elementary school before finally being diagnosed in fourth grade. By then, the damage had been done and he hated school. He was often made to feel like he wasn’t as smart as his peers. When he would get frustrated, he’d end up acting out and causing problems for his teachers. Or he’d get into fights with other students.
There were times when I wondered if River would have the grades to get into college. He worked with a tutor all through high school and managed to turn things around for himself.
I’m proud of him for that.
His path to playing hockey at East Town wasn’t easy.
How ironic is it that the more I get to know Maverick, the more I realize how much he and River have in common. If they weren’t constantly pitted against one another, they could have been friends.
It’s not always easy to find people who have walked a similar path and understand the challenges you’ve faced.
“Is it total trash? Just don’t tell me that I have to start from scratch, because this paper is due in two days and there’s no way in hell I’ll be able to get it done.”
I force a smile, wanting to alleviate the strain woven through his deep voice. Before I realize it, my hand drifts to his bare arm where he’s shoved up the sleeves of his sweatshirt.
His attention drops to the place where we’re now connected.
Heat stings my cheeks when I realize what I’ve done.
Which is kind of comical, because we’ve been far more intimate than me touching his arm in a public space and offering support. Although, this is the first time I’ve initiated physical contact.
The moment I try to remove my fingers, his other hand settles over mine, locking it in place.
My gaze collides with his before becoming ensnared in his dark depths. That’s all it takes for my mouth to turn bone dry, making speech impossible.
“I like when you touch me.”
The gravel in his voice settles at the bottom of my belly like a heavy stone.
Truth be told, I like touching him too, but I’m not about to admit that. I get the feeling if I give him an inch, he’ll take a mile.
“You don’t have to redo it. There’s a lot here for us to work with,” I reassure.
His muscles gradually loosen and his brows rise. “You think so?”
A mixture of hope and surprise rings throughout those three little words.
My lips lift into more of a smile as his fingers stay locked around mine. “Yeah. We just need to give it a little more organization, add a few more supporting statements, and clean up some of the grammar and sentence structure. It’ll take some work, but it’s much easier than starting over. And two days is plenty of time to make adjustments.”
“That doesn’t sound so bad,” he says with a nod.
“I promise it won’t be. Here’s the caveat—I’m more than willing to point out areas that can be improved and give suggestions, but I’m not going to rewrite the paper for you.” I don’t necessarily want to bring up his possible disability, but it would help to know exactly what I’m dealing with. “I spent a lot of time in high school helping my brother with his homework.” I force out the rest. “Your paper reminds me of his.”
He stills as his grip tightens around mine. “Oh?”
“He has dyslexia and really struggled with it. Especially before he was diagnosed…” Unsure what else to say, my voice trails off.
I know I’ve hit the mark when color seeps into his cheeks and he glances away.
My heart twists as I scoot closer. “I’m not trying to embarrass you. It’s just…it’ll be easier for us to work together if I understand what the issue is.”
His gaze settles on mine as he releases a pent-up breath. “Yeah, I have dyslexia. My parents realized what was going on right away because my dad also has it. So, I had early intervention.”
“I’m sure that helped. My parents were reluctant to believe that there was anything wrong with my brother.”
Some of his embarrassment fades. “You never mentioned having a sibling. Is he older?”
I chew my lower lip and nod. “Yeah.”
Technically.
By four minutes.
“Does he attend Western?”
“No.” I clear my throat, no longer wanting to discuss my family. I’m afraid he’ll put two and two together and figure out that River isn’t my boyfriend.
But my brother instead.
And then all hell will break loose.
It would be so much easier if I didn’t feel anything for Maverick. If I didn’t like the way it feels when he lays his hands on me. Or enjoy the time we spend together.
But that’s not the case.
It takes effort to banish that thought.
“What about you?”
As soon as the question leaves my lips, I realize that I met his sister the other day at lunch. It’s tempting to admit the truth, but I hold it back.
“Just a sister. She’s older by a year and also attends Western. She’s pre-med.”
“That’s really impressive.”
His lips curve as he nods. “Juliette is really smart. She’s the one who helped me in school when I needed it. Even when I came here, she made time to work with me, but the more challenging her classes have become, the less she’s been able to do that.” He jerks his shoulders and stares at the computer screen. “Plus, she’ll graduate this spring and won’t be around much longer, so I need to figure it out on my own.”
It’s obvious from the pride that fills his tone that he doesn’t resent her for not struggling with the same academic challenges.
“Sounds like you two are really close.”
“We are.” For a long moment, he’s silent before admitting in a softer voice, “Our family was always tight, but after Mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, we became even more so. It’s the reason Juliette decided to become a doctor.”
A thick lump swells in my throat at what he’s just revealed. The emotion that had flashed in Juliette’s eyes when she’d told me about her career choice now makes more sense. “That must have been difficult.”
I know exactly how much a loved one’s diagnosis can affect their family members. It’s like a windshield getting hit with a rock and the cracks in the glass spidering outward, touching everyone. Even distantly.
Emotion flashes across his face. “It sucked. I’ve never felt so powerless in my life.”
“I can imagine.”
“There were times when she was so weak and sick from the chemo, all I could do was sit by her side and keep her company so she wasn’t alone. Nothing I did took away her pain or lessened it. The worst was watching as she lost weight and then her hair. At one point, she was a much thinner, paler shadow of her former self. And I lived in constant fear that she’d be taken from us.”
My heart contracts at his rough words. It’s so tempting to gather him up into my arms and hold him tight.
“I’m sure it meant a lot to her that you were there, offering support and cheering her on. When someone is battling an illness, having that love can be a source of real strength. It gives you something to fight for during those days when you’re so tired and sick that you just want to give up.”
His gaze sharpens on me as he nods. “Yeah, that’s exactly what she said. Sounds like you’ve been through a similar situation.”
I glance away as everything he confided swirls through my brain. “Unfortunately, I think most people have been touched by cancer in some way.”
Air deflates from his body as his shoulders collapse. “You’re right about that. Cancer fucking sucks.”
I squeeze his hand again, only wanting to pull him back to the present and out of the painful memories. “Is she all right?”
“Yeah. She’s been in remission for a couple of years now. Although, every time she goes in for bloodwork or a checkup, I worry that something will pop up and it’ll send our family tumbling down the rabbit hole again. When she was first diagnosed, I did a ton of research so I could understand what was happening and how bad it was. I was afraid that my parents weren’t being truthful about the prognosis because they didn’t want us to stress. What I know is that if it comes back for a second time, it’ll be more aggressive.”
Goose bumps break out across my skin. Even though they don’t mention it, I’m all too aware that my family worries about the same thing.
It only makes me realize that River and Maverick have even more in common.
Although, it’s doubtful either of them would appreciate me pointing out the similarities.
“I know it’s easier said than done, but you can’t live your life waiting for the other shoe to drop or worrying about things that might never come to pass.” The words burst out of my mouth before I can stop them. “None of us are guaranteed anything in this world. I don’t know your mom, but I doubt she’d want you to live in constant fear for what the future will bring.”
It’s certainly not what I want for the people in my life.
“And she doesn’t want to be constantly reminded of her sickness and what will happen if it returns.”
There’s nothing worse than your family staring at you like you have an expiration date tattooed across your forehead. Almost as if they’re already mourning your loss.
His brows knit as he digests my outburst. “I get what you’re saying. It’s just…” His tongue darts out to moisten his lips as his steady gaze searches mine. “Hard to make peace with the fact that one of the most important people in your life could be taken from you at any time.”
“I know. But what’s the alternative?” There’s a beat of silence. “To hold yourself back from caring or loving anyone? To isolate yourself so you never have to feel pain? It’s part of the human condition. No one goes through it without experiencing both love and loss. It’s just not possible. Maybe you don’t realize it, but there’s freedom in accepting and embracing that during our lifetime, you’ll have to get through it.”
“I guess I’m still trying to work through everything in my head.” His attention drops to where our hands are still clasped. “I’m not there yet.”
My muscles soften at the heartfelt conversation we’re having in the middle of the library.
It’s not something I would have expected.
At every turn, Maverick continues to surprise me.
His gaze lifts to mine again. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“I don’t know,” he mutters with a shrug. “Letting me unload. Other than talking to my sister, it’s not something I usually do.” His lips quirk as some of the heaviness fades from his expression. “Shocker…it actually feels good.”
My heart swells with so much emotion that there’s a possibility it’ll burst. He has no idea just how intimately acquainted I am with what he’s been through. It’s so tempting to share my experiences with him, but I’m afraid that Maverick would look at me differently.
Treat me differently.
And that’s the last thing I want.
Before I can refocus our conversation and suggest that we get back to work, he pops to his feet and pulls me up with him.
My eyes widen at the sudden movement. “Where are we going?”
“You’ll see.”
With his fingers locked around my wrist, he drags me through the stacks until we’re buried in a distant corner, away from prying eyes.
When he grinds to a halt, I stumble into his bigger body. His hands wrap around my upper arms before he forces me backward until my spine hits the shelving unit.
“Maverick?” I squeak.
“I’m taking your advice and living in the moment.”
Before I can come up with a response, his mouth crashes onto mine and his tongue sweeps over the seam of my lips. As soon as I open, he slips inside to tangle with my own. And then I’m lost. My palms settle on the steely strength of his chest. Instead of pushing him away, I drag him closer until my arms can twine around his neck.
A groan rumbles up from him. The deep vibration of it is enough to flood my panties with heat.
He pulls away enough to mutter, “You have no idea how much I’ve wanted to do that. It’s all I’ve thought about these past few days.”
And then his lips are colliding with mine again, and he’s dragging me down to the bottom of the ocean where sucking in a full breath becomes impossible. I don’t realize that his hand has slipped down the front of my leggings and panties until he slides a finger deep inside my pussy.
When a gasp escapes from me, he swallows it up.
It’s leisurely that he pumps his finger a few times. The thick slide of it feels amazing. It’s enough to make me forget that we’re in the middle of the library and anyone could walk past and catch a glimpse of what we’re doing.
When I whimper, he nips my lower lip before asking, “Feel good, sunshine?”
The more he plays with my body, the less I care about what’s going on around me.
The stroke of his tongue matches the pace of his finger. There’s something so delicious about the way he takes me from zero to one hundred in the blink of an eye. It doesn’t take long before my body is straining for more and I’m dancing precariously close to the edge, waiting to be nudged over the precipice.
“Your pussy is so damn creamy,” he groans, all the while continuing to torment me. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about how good you taste.”
That husky admittance is all it takes to send me tumbling over the cliff. The orgasm that slams into me is enough to steal my breath away.
“That’s it. Ride my hand. Show me exactly how much you like the way I play with you.”
Stars explode behind my eyelids as I grind my pelvis against him. There’s so much sensation rushing through my veins. It almost becomes too much for the confines of my skin.
By the time the last shockwave zips through me, my knees weaken. If he weren’t holding me pressed against the bookshelves, I’d slide to the floor in a puddle.
Maverick brushes another kiss against my lips as his finger glides in and out of my over-sensitized body.
“You’re gorgeous when you fall apart.”
His eyes darken with hunger as he pulls out before rubbing soft circles against my clit and slipping free of my leggings. His gaze stays pinned to mine as he brings his finger to his mouth and sucks the digit between his lips.
I didn’t think it was possible for his eyes to become any more heated.
The sparks that fly from them nearly singe me alive. Even though he just made me come, already need is brewing to life inside me.
“Just as delicious as I remember.”
When I remain silent, unable to wrap my brain around an appropriate response, there’s a flash of white teeth as he grins.
“I think we’ve studied enough for one night. Let’s get out of here.”