Lustful Hearts

I awoke to a bright light shining deep into my eyes. I jerked back as my eyes responded to the sudden bright glare.

What the hell was going on?

"It's okay, Iz, they need to check you over to see if there's anything wrong. You keep going in and out of consciousness." He smiled reassuringly, but I saw a look of anguish on his face. I looked at him dumbfounded.

Was he really here, or was I just dreaming?

"Are you real?" I whispered, afraid of the answer.

He chuckled, his finger softly stroking my face. "Iz, it's me. I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. I'm back for good."

My breath hitched at his words.

He was really back?

I wanted to talk to him, to touch him, to wrap myself around his beautiful body. But all my thoughts were shattered when the nurse bustled Joel away much to my absolute horror.

"You know I'm fine, I think I should go," I dropped my feet down onto the floor. I was ready to chase Joel down before I stumbled. My head began spinning again, and a strong pair of arms caught me, breaking my fall as I sagged against her.

"Get back in that bed right now, young lady. You're going nowhere until Dr Stephens has checked you over and signed you fit to leave."

I didn't argue, she had strength on her side. She scowled watching me intently until I slowly slipped back into bed. I closed my eyes still unable to take it all in.

He was here.

He was actually here.

Then everything came flooding back.

Cindy. Oh god. The kiss in the street.

Maybe it had been a fling?

He looked happy to see me. He said he was back for good. Whether that meant to be with me was something I needed to find out.

The nurse walked back in with a jug of water. "Has Joel gone?" I asked, the panic rising in my voice. I leaned forward trying to see out the door window.

"Joel? Oh the cute guy, is he your boyfriend? No, he's still here. He definitely has a way with the ladies. He's got quite a few of the young nurses charmed, they wanted to know if he's single." I saw a wry smile on her face. I knew Joel had probably had some affect on her too.

Was everyone susceptible to him?

I instantly felt jealous. But he wasn't mine to possess, to claim. But I definitely didn't want him dating either. "No, he's not my boyfriend. He's actually gay; he goes out with my brother." I bit my lip to suppress a smile, hoping she'd buy my lie.

"All the good looking ones are." She chuckled. "They will be disappointed when I report back." She finished pouring out the water as I fought the need to laugh.

"Sorry." I shrugged, trying hard to keep a straight face. Until she left and then the laughter broke free. I knew it was wrong to lie, but here I was on my deathbed with nurses circling, hoping for a date with my guy.

Well technically, I wasn't dying and he wasn't my guy anymore, but these women seemed the type that would hit on him at my funeral before I was even cold.

"What are you laughing at?"

My eyes were still closed, but I didn't need to open them to know just who that delicious voice belonged to. "Oh just a private joke." I wiped the tears away, opening my eyes to take in the vision before me. "So you're not going to share?" His eyes grew wider, waiting for a response.

I pushed myself up slightly and propped myself against the pillow to get a better view. "Not right now. I need to know why you came back."

His face instantly frowned at my response. "Are you not happy I'm back?" I saw a look of hurt flash in his eyes. He pulled the chair closer and sat down beside me. His hand softly stroked my hair back as he gently kissed my forehead.

I closed my eyes as he continued to caress my face and let out a small sigh of contentment. We sat in silence for a few moments, and I just concentrated on his touch.

"Iz, do you want to be with me?"

My eyes wrenched open in shock. "Always, I will never stop wanting to be with you. I love you so much, when you left a piece of my heart died. I've never stopped thinking about you for one moment. Even my dreams are filled with you. I hated waking up every morning to find you gone, and that I was still alone grieving for the love we once had."

I paused, catching my breath. I had to try to speak the next words without breaking down.

"Joel, there is something you should know... after I told you we should go on a permanent break, I came to Manchester to see you."

He looked visibly shocked. "When was that?" he whispered.

"It was over a month ago. I was so grief stricken I caught a train up to talk to you, to beg you to take me back, but then I saw you..." My voice trailed off, and I started to cry, no longer able to hold the tears back.

"What is it, Iz?" His eyes pleaded with me to go on. I swallowed a few times to clear my throat, my voice now thick with emotion.

"I was literally metres away from you. You were stood in the street with your back to me. I was just about to run up when Cindy appeared. You kissed and hugged her in front of me, and it broke my heart-" I started sobbing, reliving my worst moment ever.

He grabbed my face in his hands, his eyes locking with mine. "Izzy, did you see me actually kiss Cindy on the lips?"

I scowled at his tone. "No, you had your back to me, but I saw her lean in to kiss you." I tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let me.

"Izzy, Cindy flirts with me all the time. She's a good friend and was there for me after we broke up."

I raised my eyebrows in a questioning mode.

Oh god, I felt sick again.

"Not like that, she was there for me on my low days, when all I wanted to do was to pack up and come home to you. You're all I want, Iz, you and you alone. I know you have issues with all the girls that flirt with me, but you're the only one I see. You're the only one I want to be with. It's only you, Iz, it will only ever be you."

I cupped his cheek with my hand, my thumb brushed up against his cheekbone. I had missed this face so much. He leaned over and placed a tender kiss on my lips, so gentle I hardly felt it.

I moaned in response, softly pressing my lips more firmly against his. He gently licked my bottom lip before entering, his tongue delicately caressing my own.

The electricity between us became intense. I grabbed the back of his head, pulling him into me. He groaned, slowly manoeuvring himself to lie next to me.

Every single part of me wanted him, to be wrapped around him. To feel his body pressed against mine, to touch and taste him and breathe in his delicious warm, comforting scent.

I moaned softly when his lips broke away. He pressed his forehead against mine as his fingers softly caressed the skin of my lower back.

The tears began to fall with the enormity of the last month. Every single moment of pain and anguish came flooding out with every single tear that was shed.

"Hey please don't cry, baby. I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying here with you."

"This last month, Joel-"

He let out a loud sigh. "I know. . . I lived through it too."

I pulled myself up to see the pain and anguish shining there in his eyes. I pressed my lips against his to help soothe each other in the best way we knew how.

We were too busily entwined in our own state of bliss to notice Nurse Ruth has walked back in the room.

"Gay, huh?" She chuckled, a bemused expression crossed her face.

I laughed, and Joel stared, oblivious to the joke. He then chuckled, working out I'd been less than truthful when it came to his sexuality.

His nose tenderly brushed up against mine. "Iz, you trying to keep the ladies away from me?"

His words made me blush. I turned my head into the pillow and screwed my eyes tight. "I'm yours and yours only, you have me forever," he whispered.

The sweetest words I had ever heard.

I heard Nurse Ruth close the door quietly behind her. I peeped open an eye, only to see Joel's shining with so much love. I took his face in both of my hands, guiding him back down to my lips. I didn't want to waste a moment longer.0000000