SWNOVELS Chapter 8 Friendship
This feels great that we made up and all but something about this didn’t sit well with me. Maybe it was just my head tingling from all the hair pulling last night. But whatever the case might be, we arrived at the cafeteria, and thank goodness, there weren’t too many people in line because I was starving. Before we got in line to order, Margaret asked me a strange question from out of nowhere. She asked, “Lizzie, if it’s alright with you, can the two of us sit and eat breakfast together today? I-I don’t want to sit with the girls.”
Ok, this is strange; why does she want to be with me? What’s her deal? She hasn’t done this to me before...why is she starting now? Whatever is off here better presents itself soon because I do not want to be the first one to find out. Caught off guard, I answered, “Uhh...yeah, sure thing, Margie.” We then got in line to order our breakfast.
My typical breakfast back at home usually consists of a maple syrup waffle, a glass of orange juice, and a blueberry muffin, but I had to settle for a tray consisting of undercooked scrambled eggs and a carton of Orange Juice instead. After we paid, we walked around with trays in our hands, looking for a spot for the two of us. I found a table next to a big pillar, sat down, and called her over.
Having a bite of my undercooked scrambled egg, she asked me, “So what do you think of that dude behind us? He’s kinda cute, right?”
“Where are you going with this?” I asked.
She gave me a look of annoyance in her eyes, huffed at me, and answered, “I just want you to take a real good look at him, come back, and tell me what you think, that’s all.” But when I tried to turn around to see who she was talking about, she stopped me and said, “N-N-No-o-o don’t look now, he’ll see you. Ok, look now.” I then rolled my eyes and took a look at him. He was tall, had black hair, wore jeans and a short-sleeved shirt, but he was anything but cute when he decided to pick his nose, thinking no one would notice.
Well, I definitely noticed, dude, and that was disgusting. Regardless of being a guy or girl, that’s still gross. But being tangled in this girl web for the past two weeks wasn’t all bad, though. For one, I really tried to nit-pick these girls’ brains into understanding what they see in us men. To my dismay, I didn’t really get a definitive answer. So, I don’t get it. I really don’t. I mean, we are not that cute, have any hidden talents really, or unique in some way, but at least we don’t pick our noses as that guy did. Speaking of which, I said, “Hey, I’m done looking at him, and he’s so not my type. Besides, I just saw him pick his nose.”
She replies with the classic “Ewww, gross. But other than that, he’s quite the catch, isn’t he?”
“Maybe for someone else, but not for me,”
“Ok, I get that, Lizzie but like if you were to rate him on a scale of say one to ten, what would you give him?”
“Hmmm, I’ll give him an eight or a seven just because of the nose-picking. What would you give him?” I asked. Just so you are aware, I don’t know if it was me being surrounded by girls all the time making me act like this but whatever I was saying seemed almost natural to me.
Anyway, she answered, “I’ll give him an eight or a nine because he’s got quite the looks for a nose-picker.”
We then proceeded to rate more guys than I can count. There were so many passing by us staring, and some even tried to strike a conversation with us. The looks they gave were of disbelief at how drop-dead gorgeous we were. I mean, I couldn’t really blame them. One of them even said that we looked like Kelly and Sabrina from the show, Charlie’s Angels. Whatever that is. At the beginning of this boy shenanigan, I didn’t know Up from Down, and I made a fool of myself in front of the first two boys that talked to us. I felt so embarrassed when they left.
It didn't help when my mother just had to ask, “Elizabeth, why did you say that in front of those two boys?”
“I know. I’m sorry,” I answered, looking completely guilty.
Out of the blue, she asked, “Sorry for what? If you’re sorry about making me look bad in front of them, then your apology is accepted. You did great! You really had those dorks thinking that you were this dumb girl. Boy, when they figure out that they’ve been played,” as she laughed. She then asked, “Who taught you how to act like that?”
I gave a little nervous chuckle to myself and said, “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you this, but it was my mom.”
“Ooo, can you tell me more about what your mom did, please?!”
“Do You Want Me To Teach You?” I asked.
Margaret nodded her head in agreement.
Wait! You’re telling me that girls can fake being dumb to guys just to laugh at how gullible they are, then those same girls rate how attractive the guy was after they are done laughing. Ohhh… in that case, this can be fun. So, I gave my mom some pointers on how to act “The Ross way,” as I called it before some bozo ruined our moment and not a moment too soon. Believe it or not, this worked. Who knew guys could be so gullible when it comes to love? I actually found it quite enjoyable and laughed with her on a couple of occasions. I mean, what they are doing just to impress us is ridiculous. From showing us their ripped bod or telling us a weird fact about them that I didn’t want to know. Seems to me that guys only care about themselves, our appearance and only want our number just to impress their buddies. They don’t seem to be interested or care what a girl thinks of this or even bother to ask anything about them...at all. That’s so messed up.
I don’t know how any guy could fall for that without asking something about the girl first because even I wouldn’t try to do that. Wait, yes, I would. I...I..I had done that before. I used to be one of those gullible and selfish guys too. It’s all coming back to me now. During the beginning of my junior year, I tried asking a couple girls for their Instagram or Snapchat during homecoming, but I talked more about myself than them, and they left me hanging.
No wonder I never got a text back from them because I’m probably like the millionth person to do that to them. Anyway, before I get too depressed, we were having a good time then suddenly we saw another boy duo coming at us, so we tried to get their attention this time for a change...by… flipping our hair back and forth or batting our eyelashes at them, but they seemed to be in a hurry and ran past us without taking a second look. Actually, I take that back now because one of them, who was this somewhat tall, scrawny kid with big glasses, braces, and brown wavy hair, stopped for a second to stare at me. Annoyed, I huffed and turned my head away to let him know that I was not interested, and when I turned my head back, both of them were gone like ghosts. Very strange.
This never happened to us before, so being curious where they went, I asked Margaret, “Hey, did you see where those boys ran off to?”
She answered, “Ohhhhh, those two that went past us just now? They went to the far back of the cafeteria, I think. Why?”
I then asked, “Did you get a good look at them by any chance?”
“Sure did. There was one geek and one blond.”
“There was a blonde?” I asked.
“Mhm and quite a handsome fella, if I might add,” she answered. “But first, you gotta tell me what you rate Mr. Four Eyes over there who had eyes for you. I’m dying to know.”
You know I felt sorry for the geek and really could relate to him because not that long ago, I had braces throughout my 8th grade and Sophomore year of high school. Having braces throughout that time was the worst, and it was really hard for me to get noticed by any girl and get them to even acknowledge that I existed. But when I got them off, only then did they start to notice. With that in mind, I boldly stated, “Eight.”
Margaret, in shock, replied, “Eight?!...you’re joking,” as she laughed. But quickly stopped once she realized that I wasn’t laughing with her.
She then asked, “Oh, you’re serious. Well, can you at least give me some reason as to why on this God’s green earth you gave that boy an eight before I start guessing?”
I don’t know why but I blurted out, “Maybe he’s more to it than the braces. Have you thought of that?”
“I guess, but the girls won’t like to hear that, you know, and what do you say about his buddy then, huh? Surely, he’s definitely higher than an eight.”
“I’ll give him a Seven,” I replied.
“A sev--seven? You...you gotta be joking. You didn’t even see him. I mean, you gave that geek an eight. An...Eight! Lizzie, that’s like so unheard of, not to mention unfair to his buddy back there, and you know it.”
Annoyed, I replied, “Ahhh, fine. If what you say is true, I’ll give him an eight too. Are you happy now?”
Margaret replied, “Very.” She then looked wide-eyed and suddenly said, “Ah, Lizzie….don’t look now, but I think they heard you cause they’re coming this way.” Sure enough, these two dunderheads were heading straight towards us.
In a moment of panic, she said, “Ok, act super natural and look totally not interested in them. Can you do that?” Heh, you don’t have to tell me twice. So, when these two confronted us, I took one good look at both of them and turned my head away. But I couldn’t help myself but completely stare at the geek, and I hate to say it, but Margaret was right about him; he was a total geek. I mean, come on, the big nerdy glasses that had the words geek written all over it.
Margaret is so right. I don’t know why I haven’t called him that sooner. Anyway, his blond buddy, on the other hand, looked like your average dumb jock. I mean, he had a long mullet, for crying out loud, not to mention wearing Nike everything, and I mean everything from the shirt down to the shoe, heck maybe he was wearing Nike boxers too, who knows.
That’s when one of the guys finally made the first move on us after a couple moments of arguing back and forth between themselves, probably contending who’s going to talk to us first. Blondie must’ve won the argument because the first thing that came out of his mouth was, “Hey ladies, umm, sorry you had to see that. My friend here is a little shy, but he told me to tell both of you that you look great.” I looked at the geek, and he slapped his head in embarrassment while silently muttering “Idiot” to himself. I couldn’t help but give a chuckle, because of all the things he could’ve said about us, that was what he went for as his first move on the ladies. Seriously, dude. Wow, so original. I haven’t heard that one before, and if he had tried that out to a girl to any girl during my real lifetime, he would get denied real quick like he’s going to in any moment now.
Anyway, he continued saying, “My name is John Robinson if you’re wondering, but you two can call me Johnny, and my buddy right here is….”
I looked at them for a second as he just put his arm over the geek’s shoulder and said, “Robbie Shelton and you two ladies must have names, right. What are they?”
I turned my head away from them just as he said that. Margaret said, “We do have names actually...I’m Margaret, and this stubborn one right next to me is Elizabeth. What do you boys want? And make it quick. We were kinda in the middle of something here.”
John replied, “We were uh..like...wondering if you two would be interested in going to Baker’s Square with us sometime tomorrow perhaps?”
Ok, I’m totally with her on this one. Can these boys do us a solid and leave us alone already? Why can’t Margaret say something to them to make them go away faster? What’s wrong with her, and I’m so annoyed by their efforts, especially that of one John Robinson. Wait…wait, that name. did he really say his name was John...Robinson. Now, where have I heard that before? Suddenly, as if a bolt of lightning hit me, I had these flashbacks of me spending time with my dad, and in one of those flashbacks, I heard my mother calling my dad for dinner when he was on a phone call with an “important client,” and she called him John….Robinson.
Ok, so they might share a last name… and a first name, apparently. But that still doesn’t make him my dad because I know a couple of people that I can name off the top of my head who share a last name that aren’t even related, so that cannot be him. I mean, he just can’t. This blondie is too…too...out there, and even if this guy does bear a resemblance to my dad, it’s probably a case of mistaken identity or a doppelganger, but I need more proof to be sure. So, I turned around and had a look at him one last time, and John did something that only my dad would do, and he would give this surfer type laugh whenever he got excited. THEN it happened. I heard the laugh.
I hate to say it, but this kid is really...my...my, uh, dad. That’s going to get hard to get used to. By the way, I’m slowly starting to notice where I got my ladies’ charm and good sense of humor from, but man, he’s so different from what he is now. What happened? But this isn’t the way my parents first met, though. What is happening? because ever since I can recall, they always told me that they met in college, specifically in this very cafeteria.
The story goes that my dad told a bad joke to cheer my mom up when she was all alone one day. Was this it? But before I could think more clearly about this,
I overheard Margaret say, “Why didn’t you say so we’ll gladly--.”
Realizing what was about to happen, I tried to intervene and said, “Mo-mo-Margie, woah! Let’s not be too hasty here. Maybe we shou--.”
She then had the audacity to put her hand over my mouth in public and whispered, “Don’t worry, you’ll thank me later,” turned to the guys and said, while having her hand on my mouth, “Sorry about my friend here; she tends to get a little crabby when she’s hungry. Isn’t that right, Lizzie?”
“What?!” I said, being muffled.
Robbie then asked, “Hey, can you excuse us for a minute? I need to talk to John about something. It’s pretty important.”
She said, “Sure…take as much time as you need,” as she waved. I saw them head off in the distance, and once they were out of sight, Margaret took her hand off my mouth and asked with a hint of anger, “What was that, Liz? Now, when I said to act like you’re not interested in them, I didn’t mean literally! Gosh! What’s gotten into you, girl? I mean, one minute you’re totally boy crazy, and the next, you don’t want anything to do with them. What gives?”
I answered, “Well …these… boys....are...different, and this sounds like a terrible idea if you ask me. Why did you even get me involved when I told you that I have to be at my brother’s birthday party at 3:30 pm tomorrow. You know as well as I do that I can’t be late. You gotta fix this when they come back and cancel on them, or else I will. I’m serious.”
The boys came back, and John said, “Hey, we talked it over, and that sounds good to us.”
I smirked, thinking that my mom would do the right thing, but I was speechless when she replied, “Great, and does next Saturday work better for you two? cause Lizzie here reminded me that she has a family party to go on that day and can’t make it.” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My own mother betrayed me like that. How could she after everything I did for her?
While I stood there being quiet as a mouse, John took this opportunity to give a quick glance at Robbie before saying, “Yeah... that works out better for us actually, and does 12:30 pm sound good to you two?”
Margaret replied, “That works, see you then, boys,” as she excitedly waved goodbye to them as they left. As soon as they were gone, I asked her, “Why did you do that when I told you not to?”
She shook her head and put one hand on my shoulder and answered, “Lizzie, Lizzie, Liz, you gotta learn to take a chill pill now and then. I only did that so you can be with that boy....Johnny, because I think...no..I know he has a total crush on you. I mean, did you see the way he looked at you? It was so obvious I couldn’t help but say something when you didn’t.”
Uh...Oh...this can’t be good. I think I just stopped my parents from ever meeting. But just to make sure that she wasn’t yanking my chain when she usually is, I replied, “No...no... you’re totally wrong, he...he...must have been looking at you, I’m sure of it.”
She surprised me with a good comeback, saying, “Nope, I’m pretty sure he only had his eyes on you because he couldn’t keep them off you. But hey, this is the perfect time to tell the girls what happened to me... I mean you...errr, us right now where---”
Sarcastically, I said while interrupting her, “Hey, why don’t you make this into a whole day while you’re at it? I mean, you’re halfway there already.” Just then, I heard the most obnoxious girlish squeal of joy in my life.
After she squealed, she replied, “That’s a great idea, Liz. Let’s make this into a whole day starting tomorrow. Oh, I can see it now. We’ll have so much fun at the Water Tower Place Mall like we usually do. But this time, it will be way better once the rest of the girls are caught up to speed, and I bet they will find the perfect dress for us next Saturday. This will be the best girl’s day ever!”
I immediately thought, “Me and my big mouth,” as I was dragged to our table where she told the girls everything. I knew all their names and quirks by now. The first ones that introduced themselves were Anna and Kim on the first day I was here.
But I was quickly introduced to the rest by the second, and their names are as follows: Melissa, who like, Margie, likes to be the one in charge. They tend to clash at times, and when it does happen, it’s quite funny to watch. She had chocolate brown hair that was very straight but had to have one big pastel color bow on her hair, and she couldn’t be seen without it. There was Jodi, who everyone around me calls Jo. She was the only blonde in the group and had a little puffiness to her hair. She tended to be a bit childish, while another girl by the name of Courtney, who everyone calls Court, wasn’t. She was more of a bookworm, as I recall, and was more of the quiet side. Now, who can forget Tiffany, aka Tiff, who I’m pretty sure was Italian.
I mean, she was short, tan, had a black afro, and always had something to say, whether or not anyone cared to listen. Anyway, I was the first to say that I couldn’t stay long and insisted on driving there. But I didn’t plan on saying anything about taking passengers along for the ride. Anna, Tiff, and Court volunteered themselves to go with me because they wanted to keep me company and didn’t want me to drive back and forth both times alone. Sarcastically I thought, “That’s exactly what I need. How did they know?’’ With that, I guess we had a plan. I would drive Anna, Tiff, and Court, while Marge drove Mellissa and Kim drove Jo. The rest would be figured out at the mall.
What in the world have I gotten myself into?