SWNOVELS Chapter Billionaire My Husband 215
HOPE
JESS
The bathroom floor was cold against my knees as I knelt there, clutching the toilet bowl, my whole body trembling as I emptied what little was left in my stomach. I felt hollow, both inside and out. It had been a week since Luke and Josh's flight
disappeared, and every minute since had been a cocktail of terror, helplessness, and a strange, bitter hope that gnawed at the edges of my mind.
I rinsed my mouth, feeling the sting of acid on my tongue as splashed water on my face. The mirror's glass was fogged from the humidity, obscuring my reflection-
a small blessing. I didn't want to see myself like this, barely holding it together. Laura was finally asleep in the other room, her breathing soft and shallow in the darkness, and I couldn't bear to add my own despair to hers.
Every morning since we arrived in Jakarta, we'd sat at the edge of whatever seat or bed we could find, phones in hand, waiting for a notification. We clung to each tidbit of information, no matter how small: a few planes had landed on the surrounding islands, some with pas their jet-the hope fizzled out. Nothing had come in, and the days without answers were stretching so long they felt like a cruel dream.
I needed a cold shower to clear my head and rinse away the shadows clinging to me. As I stepped under the spray, the water
HOPE
felt like tiny needles on my skin, sharp enough to keep me tethered and pull me back from the edge. I tilted my head back, letting it run over my face, my neck, and down to my shoulders, each drop like a reminder of something solid, something real.
I closed my eyes, clasped my hands together, and like every other morning, I whispered a prayer. I didn't care if it sounded desperate or foolish. "Please let them be okay. Please." The words left me barely above a breath, but they felt like they cost everything I had.
As I stood there, I felt the tears start to prick at the corners of my eyes. The water mixed with them, carrying them away as fast as they fell. It was easier that way, letting the water mask what I couldn't afford to show-
not to Laura or myself. Because if I broke down now if both of us lost hope, then that was it. The end. We'd go home, and our lives would change forever, carrying this hollow ache with us, a black hole where our memories of them should have been.
I thought of Luke's voice, the way he used to tease me until I cracked a smile, no matter how hard I tried not to. His smile, that half-
smirk of his that always seemed to say, I know something you don't. I could almost feel the warmth of his hand around mine, the strength in his grip when he pulled me out of whatever mess I'd managed to stumble into. I didn't realize until now how much I'd depended on h Josh, too-I could see his carefree grin, that dumb sense of humor that made everything feel lighter like the world was just some game, and he'd figured out how to play it. He was my twin, my other half, and even though Luke is my completion, 288 Woucherg
Josh is a small part of me, too.
I shut off the shower, the silence that followed almost deafening, punctuated only by my shaky breaths. I dried off slowly, the motions mechanical and robotic, as though some part of me was already giving up, already surrendering to the worst. But I wouldn't. I couldn't. I ne Wrapping the towel around myself, I stepped out into the dim light of the hotel room. Laura was curled up on her side, her breathing even, her face so pale it was almost translucent in the early morning glow. Her eyes were puffy from crying, her cheeks still marked with fain I knew she was barely holding on and counting on me to be the strong one, to keep that last thread of hope alive.
I walked over to the window, pressing my forehead against the glass. Jakarta was awake beneath me, the city bustling with life, utterly unaware of our pain. Cars honked, street vendors set up their stalls, and people moved on with their day, with their lives. And here we we I touched the spot on my neck where Luke's hand had rested the last time we were together, right before he left. His fingers had been warm and steady, a small but solid promise that I'd see him soon. That he'd come back. I squeezed my eyes shut, a fresh wave of tears th Please, let him come back. Let them both come back.
I couldn't remember how long I stood there, but eventually, the morning light grew stronger, spilling across the room. Laura
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stirred behind me, murmuring in her sleep, and I quickly swiped a hand over my face, brushing away any trace of weakness.
I knew I'd have to face her soon, to keep the mask in place, to smile and say, "We're going to find them. They're going to be okay." Because if I stopped saying it out loud, if I let that tiny, flickering light of hope go out, then I didn't know how I'd make it through the day. Taking one last, steadying breath, I turned back to the room, ready to pretend for one more day to keep us from slipping into that dark place where we might never find our way out.
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