Let Me Love You

With my sweatpants on, I went into the kitchen and chased down two Advil with black coffee, hating the harsh pain in my temples from drinking way more than normal last night. For once in my life, I’d wanted to lose control. And I nearly had with Maria.

Spotting my phone on the counter where I’d left it, I hesitantly flipped it over. The screen lit up with far too many texts I wasn’t prepared to face.

I thumbed through the notifications, then shut off the screen, deciding I wanted to see the woman of my dreams asleep in my bed one more time before my world flipped upside down.

Pocketing my phone, I went back into my bedroom armed with my coffee and mixed emotions. How was I going to leave her later?

I leaned into the interior doorframe, studying her. Part of her face was covered by her long, thick hair. She must’ve been hot, because she’d shoved the covers down, and my white tee was bunched at her hips, showing her long, tan legs and a hint of her panties.

She shifted to her side, propping her hands beneath her face, but she remained peacefully asleep, and my heart ached at the sight of her in my bed, where I wanted her to spend every night for the rest of our lives.

It was almost too painful to see her there, to know what I could have if only I . . .

I stepped back and quietly drew the door shut and settled into an armchair by the fireplace to call Constantine.

“I wasn’t drunk,” was the first thing I said once he picked up. “You didn’t need to worry.” But sleeping with Maria in my arms had been what I’d needed, though I hadn’t realized it until she showed up with all that determination in her eyes, prepared to fight my battles alongside me. My fireball.

“You had me worried,” Constantine grumbled. “You’re not one to throw back the whiskey like that.”

I set the coffee mug aside, but my gaze lingered on the words CHEF’S KISS on it with a pair of red lips by the writing. It’d been one of my gifts from Maria for my birthday. “And you?” I cleared my throat. “What’d you do after I told you what I learned and sent you the cleaner’s files?”

Alessandro probably had sex all night to try and handle his tension like I’d nearly done.

But Constantine? My brother was a question mark at times, and I didn’t always understand how he could maintain his cool without exploding like I did.

“I worked,” he answered in a steady tone.

“Oh, great. Mergers and acquisitions are more important than our—”

“I worked on Bianca’s case,” he fired back at my shitty sarcasm. “I went through all our old files from the investigation. I spent all night on it.”

His words had my shoulders falling. My anger from last night was circling back without Maria in my presence to calm me down. “And?”

“And it doesn’t make sense. She had no enemies we were aware of, and she would’ve told you if something was wrong. You two were close.” He paused for a moment. “She didn’t have a boyfriend at the time. Not even a lover. Even if she kept them hidden from us, there would have been photos when we packed up her place. Or the guy would’ve come to the funeral, right?” He hissed a deep, frustrated breath over the line. “And as for work, she’d written a few stories and articles for a magazine, but she wasn’t an Erin Brockovich who might wind up with a target on her head. And no one would be stupid enough to come after one of us, knowing our family name.”

“Not everyone in the US knows not to mess with us,” I reminded him. “But we clearly missed something back then.”

“Unless . . . well, her murder wasn’t premeditated, and it was still a crime of passion as we’d originally believed. But instead, it was committed by someone else, and he had deep enough pockets or enough power to acquire a cleaner to assist him in the middle of the night to cover up a crime.”

“What if she went somewhere after that club? Somewhere before she went home?”

“She punched in her building’s security code at around midnight, though. Shortly after we had footage of her leaving that nightclub,” he reminded me. “Unless the cleaner tampered with that, too.”

“If the guy was that good to fool us back then, it’s possible he altered even more than just when she turned off her alarm to enter her apartment.”

“I know you’re blaming yourself right now, but we were young. Inexperienced. We couldn’t have known any of this.”

“And you didn’t spend all night blaming yourself?” I retorted, and his silence was my answer. Yeah, he felt the full weight of the guilt, same as I did. Because Bianca’s killer was still out there.

“CEOs, dirty politicians, criminal groups, and—”

“The alphabet soup of government agencies all use cleaners.” I finished his line of thought. “That’s a big pool to scour through.”

“Which is why we need to interrogate the cleaner ourselves. And I don’t think your friend’s boss will let us near him.”

“Why do I get the feeling you know Jesse’s boss?” At his curse in Italian, my body tensed. “What is it?”

“I do know him, and let’s just say he’s not my greatest fan.” Constantine dropped the shit news on me. “His name is Carter Dominick. Former army Delta Force. CIA officer after that. Now coruns Falcon Falls.”

I didn’t need an introduction. I needed him to get to the point of the problem. “And?”

“Back when I was in college, before I dropped out to join the navy, Dad needed a favor from me. Didn’t give me much of a choice.” He paused to let the beginning of the storm sink in. “A company was attempting a hostile takeover of our family business. We were smaller back then, and this other corporation was ruthless. The owner was up there with Warren Buffett in terms of his bank account.” Another pause that had me uncomfortable. “Dad needed me to try and buy some time to prevent the takeover.”

“What could you possibly have done?”

“I was in school with the competitor’s daughter, and Dad asked me to try and date her. Get her to fall for me so we could delay the takeover and strategize a way to prevent it from happening.”

But how the hell was Carter part of the story? And how much of my brother’s life did I not know about? As the oldest son, how much shit had he done to keep our family’s business going?

“I was young and did what Dad told me. Did what I thought needed to be done,” he explained. “It worked. And they backed off, assuming their daughter and I might marry.”

“Tell me you didn’t sleep with her.” I pinched the bridge of my nose, worried I was going to need to beat the shit out of my older brother for something he’d done two decades ago.

“No, I’m not that much of an asshole,” he hissed. “But her best friend was Carter Dominick. When Rebecca found out what I’d done to save the company, she was upset. And let’s just say Carter came at me, swinging for retribution.”

“I’m surprised her family didn’t hold a grudge and do their best to take us down because of all that.”

Constantine was quiet for a moment. “There was an accident not long after, leaving Rebecca the only one alive in the family. She was married to Carter, though. And then, um.”

My brother didn’t ever drop an “um.” What in the hell was he going to tell me now?

“Rebecca was viciously murdered in a home invasion in DC, and Carter went rogue from the Agency, not believing it was random. I offered to help him, still feeling guilty for the past, and he told me to go fuck myself and if he ever saw me again, one of us wouldn’t be walking away.”

“Constantine . . .” What else could I say to that?

“Carter was angry, and although he’s had vengeance for his wife’s murder, I’m still certain he won’t be willing to play nice. Seeing me will dredge up bad memories.”

“I knew Dad was ruthless in business, but I didn’t think he’d use one of us to get what he wanted.”

And if I didn’t know about any of that, then what if there was more to Bianca’s life she hadn’t shared, too? What if she hadn’t told me everything while I’d been in the army, worried any distractions might prove deadly in war?

I thought back to my time in the service. I’d enlisted for four years with no plans to continue, but the war was brutal, and the army was desperate. They begged me for any more time I’d be willing to give. Feeling guilty, I offered two more years. And every day, I wished I could take that decision back, because what if Bianca would still be alive had I come home instead?

“If Dad was willing to go to such lengths as to have his own son manipulate a college girl to protect his company, then what if he pissed someone else off and they went after Bianca as retribution?” I asked, hating the idea when my dad had once been a champion of justice, someone my brothers and I had revered.

“He would’ve told us. He’d ensure the real person responsible for her death was handled—how could he not?”

“Unless he felt guilty?”

“I don’t believe it, but we need to talk to him about this no matter what.”

And how would our sister Izzy take the news? She was finally happy and had her life together. I didn’t want this to cause her to spiral.

I put Constantine on speakerphone so I could reread the last encrypted text exchange I’d had with Jesse before Maria had shown up last night.

Me: I need his name.

Jesse: You’ll get it. I promise. But don’t forget, others need justice, too.

Me: There won’t be anything left of him when I’m done.

Jesse: Which means I should’ve listened to my team, but it’s too late now.

Me: Thirteen years too late.

Jesse: Just hang tight. Please. I’ll be in touch tomorrow.

“Make sure Jesse’s at your apartment when we arrive this afternoon,” Constantine said, as if somehow knowing I was reading my texts. “I’ll get the information out of him, since he doesn’t seem to want to give it to you.”

“Jesse’s not someone you fuck with, trust me on that.”

“And neither am I,” Constantine was quick to respond, and I looked up to see the bedroom door opening.

“I have to go. See you soon.” I ended the call at the sight of Maria and set my phone on the table by the chair. “How much of that did you hear?” I’d only placed the call on speaker less than a minute ago, so hopefully not much. She didn’t need to know the dark details of what was about to go down.

“Not enough to make sense of anything.” She tugged at the hem of my white tee, which went to her midthighs, as she slowly walked my way. “How’d you sleep?”

“Better with you by my side.” I tipped my head toward her apartment next door. “Surprised no one broke down the door to check on you, though.”

“They know you’d never hurt me,” she softly said once within arm’s reach.

“Never.” I reached for her, forgetting for a moment I was supposed to become the man I was before moving to Charlotte. I’d soon need to tear apart New York until I found the answers I needed.

She sat on my lap and hooked an arm around the back of my neck while her legs dangled off to the side.

My gaze wandered appreciatively over her. From her nipples poking through my white cotton shirt to her shapely legs. I skirted a finger up her smooth thigh, and she nudged her knees apart at my touch.

God, I’d wanted her last night and nearly had given in to stroking my cock while she watched. But I knew I’d wind up pulling her into the shower with me. And I’d been too angry, too upset to be gentle with her.

“Thank you for last night. You helped me in a way I didn’t know I needed,” I shared, doing my best to maintain my control now.

“That’s what friends are for,” she murmured as I cupped her cheek with my other hand, and she leaned into my touch.

“Maria?”

“Yeah?” She pointed her big brown eyes at me. So innocent. So beautiful.

“If you ever show your tits to another ‘friend’ of yours,” I began while sliding my hand down the tender column of her throat to swirl my thumb over her nipple, “they won’t be able to see after that,” I announced in a calm voice, unable to prevent the words from leaving my mouth, because when it came to this woman, I knew there was no going back. No watching her date. Absolutely no sharing.

“Oh, is that so?” She leaned back, maintaining eye contact, then ran her short nails over the ridges of my abdominal wall.

“That’s so.” My hand on her tit quickly changed course, finding her ass, and I squeezed, probably a bit roughly. But she spread open her legs even farther at the touch, and a small whimper escaped her lips. With everything going on, it was insane for me to want to hook her panties to the side to get a good look at her pussy, wasn’t it?

I drew my mouth near hers, on the verge of kissing her despite the fact I’d told her in the parking lot last night she’d need to know my past first before our lips touched.

Seconds away from shifting her so she straddled me while I plunged my tongue inside her mouth, I was stopped by a knock at the door.

Maria groaned at the interruption. “Probably Natalia checking to see if we’re awake.” She nuzzled her nose against my neck, and my dick twitched. “We could pretend we don’t hear her?”

“We shouldn’t worry her.” And I need to behave.

Maria untangled herself from me and stood at the next knock. “I guess you’re right.”

“Give me a second and just stay in here,” I said while standing. “Unless you want your sister to see you wearing my shirt.”

She blushed and fidgeted with the loose tee, and then I forced myself to go to the foyer to face Natalia.

I wasn’t sure what I’d say to her after she’d witnessed my disastrous state last night, and I’d been an asshole, nearly begging her husband to fight me to release some steam.

I went to the door as the bell rang. I didn’t check the peephole, and why would I?

So, when I swung the door open, the last thing I expected to see was three masked men, one of them wielding a bat.