Chapter 9: Strange Sensations
As the Emperor began tormenting Hannibal’s clone body in Mirror Cell 28, Selina writhed and moaned in her sleep. Occasionally she’d jerk as if hit, groaning and gasping for breath. “No…no,” she moaned in her sleep. Sakura, Trinity, and Myra watched over her as Selina slept fitfully.
“What’s happening?” Sakura asked, noticing Selina writhing sensually as if someone were making love to her. “Why’s she doing that?”
“She’s dreaming,” Myra answered. “From her physical reactions, I suspect it may be a wet dream brought on by the connection to her man.”
Selina suddenly shrieked and bolted to a sitting position, looking around wildly. Sweat poured from her brow. Panting, she stared at her legs while clenching them together, trembling from head to toe.
“What’s wrong?” Trinity asked.
For a moment, Selina didn’t answer. When her breath steadied, she blushed deeply and sobbed softly. “What’s going on?” she wept. “This is utterly insane! I feel like I’ve just been raped and electrocuted at the same time! I don’t understand it. I’m so upset I’m shaking!”
Izanami saw the commotion and rushed to Selina’s side. “Calm down, sister,” Izanami cooed, putting her arm around Selina. “Tell me what you’re feeling.”
Selina leaned into Izanami’s motherly embrace and cried, “I can’t explain it. I dreamed I saw this auburn-haired woman in a mirrored room tied to a metal chair. She was being raped by this…this damned rubber piston built into the chair with the chair electrocuting her at regular intervals. However, that wasn’t the worst part. I could somehow feel Hannibal inside this woman, which meant I was feeling what he was feeling.” Selina choked and covered her mouth in horror, tears flowing. “What does that mean?” she begged. “How can my Hannibal suddenly be inside that woman and I feel that god-awful machine raping and electrocuting us? It’s insane, utterly insane! It’s so depraved I cannot comprehend it! Oh, God; I feel so dirty and violated.”
Myra moved in opposite of Izanami and hugged Selina from the other side. Izanami sighed deeply. “This isn’t good,” Izanami murmured. “You know for sure that your man was somehow trapped inside this woman in the dream?”
Selina nodded while crying, “Yes, it was him! I know my husband’s telepathic imprint anywhere. He’s somehow trapped inside that body, being raped and electrocuted as a woman. I felt it and his pain! It’s horrendous beyond words! Please tell me this is just a demented dream from being locked in this horrid place. Tell me that he’s not been turned into a woman, please!”
Izanami rubbed Selina’s back gently and cradled her in a caring fashion. “It’ll be okay, Selina,” she cooed. “You’ll see. It seems you’ve had another psychic dream connected to your man. You don’t have to bear this alone, sister. That’s why we’re here...to help each other bear these heinous burdens.”
“But I don’t want Hannibal to be turned into a woman,” Selina sobbed. “He’s my whole universe.”
“Remember your earlier dream, sister,” Myra said softly. “You dreamed of your man forcibly becoming a woman. Maybe this dream is an offshoot of it?”
“No, this is more than that,” Izanami admitted. “Tell me, Selina. Does this woman in the dream look like your man if he’d been changed into a woman or is this woman a complete stranger to you physically?”
“She doesn’t look like Hannibal as a woman,” Selina whimpered as she calmed down. “It’s not like the first dream where I saw Hannibal mutated into a woman. In that dream, I could clearly see Hannibal’s features in the woman he became. However, this time was different. I’ve never seen this girl before, but I clearly sensed Hannibal’s mind trapped inside her. It’s awful! He’s trapped inside a female body that’s not his own and can’t get out. He doesn’t know how. It’s put him in great physical and mental turmoil. What does it mean? How can Hannibal’s mind be trapped in someone else’s body? I don’t understand it at all.”
“This is very bad,” Izanami murmured. “If this dream is a reflection of reality, the Emperor has utilized the Avatars in his breaking of Selina’s husband.”
“Oh, no,” Trinity moaned. “It can’t be true. That’s the most depraved way to break someone.”
“What is this Avatar you speak of?” Selina asked, wiping the tears from her eyes.
“The Emperor has the technology that allows people to remotely control clones physically,” Izanami reported. “It allows a person to move a portion of their mind into the clone and control it as if it were their own body. From what I remember, while the clone is being actively controlled, the host’s body and real mind are locked in a stasis capsule in suspended animation. However, unlike true suspended animation, this technology allows the brain and mind to remain completely active and cognizant while the person remotely controls the clone avatar, literally living through the clone. This technology allows an individual to walk a mile in another’s shoes literally.
“What makes this so depraved is the Emperor routinely uses this technology as a means of torture. He’ll lock a prisoner’s mind in a clone and then torture the clone body the prisoner inhabits almost to death before removing him or her from the demolished clone body. The Emperor will repeatedly do this until the prisoner’s mind cracks or is utterly destroyed. The lousy shit has been known to put male prisoners in female clone avatars to destroy their will utterly, and vice versa. I sincerely pray this is not the case here. No male prisoner has ever survived that form of torture in all my long cycles here.”
“That’s utterly monstrous,” Selina spat with extreme disgust. “But I know that Hannibal’s mind was locked inside that girl’s mind while being raped and electrocuted by that...that damnable chair! What can I do, Izanami?” Before Izanami could reply, Selina jerked violently with a shriek as if hit in the face. As she slowly regained her wits, another cry of agonizing pain exploded from her, her arms suddenly falling limply in her lap.
“What’s wrong, sister?” Sakura asked fearfully, seeing Selina bawling with tears streaming as she stared at her arms.
“This is...impossible!” Selina sobbed in agonizing pain. “I felt like...someone just hit...me in the...face, and then...broke both my arms! I can’t move them! What in heaven’s name is happening to me?”
Sakura put her arm around Selina as Izanami asked with concern, “Where do you feel your arms are broken, sister?”
“About halfway between the elbow and wrists on both arms,” Selina whimpered, “I can’t move them at all. I don’t understand. First, I felt Hannibal locked in that girl’s mind being tortured, and now I feel this. Is the Emperor actually attacking my husband directly now?”
“I wish I knew,” Izanami replied in a worried tone as she felt Selina’s forearms. “The bones in your arms feel okay, sister. None of them feels broken, though I don’t doubt that you felt something from your man. Do you have any feeling in your arms? What about your face; you flinched just like someone slugged you.”
“My face aches,” Selina moaned, “...and my forearms are throbbing painfully and are nearly numb. I cannot move my hands or fingers at all. However, it seems the pain of whatever hit me is subsiding slowly. I could really use something to take the edge off the pain though.”
“I’m on it,” Trinity declared, “I’ll be right back.” She rushed off on a mission.
Izanami rubbed Selina left forearm gently, asking, “How does that feel?”
“It’s helping,” Selina answered in a relieved tone. “I don’t understand how I could feel something like this. It felt like someone took a sledgehammer to both my arms. I thought they were broken for sure.”
“Trust me, sister; they aren’t,” Izanami reassured, continuing her massage of Selina’s left forearm. “Did this pain you just felt come from the same source as what you woke up?”
“Yes,” Selina whimpered, tears dripping. “I think it did. In fact, I know it did. That feeling of torture and violation I woke to is still there, but at a reduced level because of what just happened. Hannibal feels very dazed now and is in terrible pain from the attack and the torture. He’s getting weaker. I can feel it. I have to help him, but I don’t know how. I don’t even know if his mind and soul are really locked in that girl’s body or not. I don’t know what to do or even believe anymore. What am I going to do? What can I do, Izanami? I have to help him. Please, tell me what to do.”
“First, relax,” Myra cooed, wiping Selina’s tears away with a handkerchief. “You’re not alone. We’re here for you, sister. All of us have had such attacks at one time or another. It’s nothing new around here.”
Trinity ran back up with four pills and a glass of water. Kneeling down next to Selina, she said, “I brought you four of our best pain-relievers. Can you use your hands yet?”
“No,” Selina answered, wired from the adrenaline of the attack and torture she felt coming from Hannibal. “I still can’t lift them, though what Izanami is doing is helping.”
“Are those the high-powered pain-killers?” Izanami asked bluntly.
“Yes,” Trinity replied. “I thought since Selina is not like us, she may need more than we do.”
“Don’t risk it,” Izanami ordered, “Just give her two of them. We don’t know how she may react to the medicine after everything Nemesis gave her.”
“Oh, right,” Trinity said in realization. “I plum forgot about that. Here, sister, open up so I can put them into your mouth.”
Selina opened her mouth and Trinity gave her two pills. She then immediately lifted the glass of water to Selina’s lips, allowing her to drink. After drinking nearly half the glass of water, Selina grunted and Trinity took the glass from her lips. “Man, looks like you were thirsty too,” Trinity observed.
“Yeah,” Selina murmured, “The water helped, but man...those pills tasted awful.”
“That they do,” Myra agreed, starting to massage Selina’s right forearm gently. “But they work very well. It’ll take about a half hour before they kick in.”
“That’s good to know,” Selina murmured, her tone still tense, along with the rest of her body. “I just wish I knew what to do. My mind just doesn’t want to accept what I’m feeling from Hannibal. It’s just too bizarre and alien to believe.” Tears started flowing again. “What am I going to do, Izanami?” she wept softly. “He’s my husband and soul mate. I don’t want to lose him, not like this.”
Sakura started massaging Selina’s shoulders. “You’re not going to lose your man,” she reassured, “...not like this. I believe in him, and in you.”
“I appreciate the vote of confidence,” Selina whimpered. “But I feel so helpless. I don’t want what I sensed to be real, but I’m just not sure it isn’t. It feels too real. He needs me, and I can’t do anything to help him. What am I going to do? I can’t get to him.”
“You don’t need to get to him,” Izanami replied, cupping Selina’s cheek with her hand in a motherly fashion. “You’re connected to him in such a way distance makes no difference. No matter how far you are from him, you can always feel and sense him. Whether you realize it or not, you can help him from right here.”
“Really?” Selina asked, genuinely surprised by Izanami’s declaration.
“Absolutely,” Izanami stated, “You and he have a mental and spiritual connection I doubt even death could break. That’s why you’re sensing what you are from him in both the dream and the attack just now. I hesitate to suggest this, but if this dream and attack are truly reflections of reality, then all you can do is pray to your god for your man’s deliverance. However, I must also remind you of the prophecy I told you about. This may be part of its fulfillment. If your man is whom I believe he is, he’ll survive all that the Emperor throws at him, even this cross-gender avatar torture slant. What you must do is when you feel him in distress is help him. If you can feel what’s happening to him, then he can feel you. Let him know he’s not alone in the dark. Strengthen and love him with the strange marvelous power that binds you two together. He needs your help more than you realize, but as I said before, be careful about letting the Emperor see your connection to your husband. If the Emperor sees that connection, he’ll do everything he can to break it. Don’t let him destroy your love for your husband. Be the clever cat I know you are. I know you can do it.”
“Thank you, sister,” Selina replied gratefully as Izanami went back to massaging Selina’s left forearm. “You’ve reminded me of my link to Hannibal, but how do I dispel this feeling of violation? It’s maddening. The nightmare has me so wired I can’t stand it. It makes me want to...well you know do things I ought not just to relieve that itch.”
“I do indeed,” Izanami answered with a motherly smile. “We all have had wet torture dreams like you did. It’s a fact of life in this dark place. Just remember, you’re the master of your body, not the Emperor. We all saw you calm Chizu’s racing pulse with your purr. You could use it on yourself to tame those raging hormones and pent-up energies. You must release it in some manner, even manually if need be. Otherwise, you’ll be overwhelmed by it. There’s no shame in doing what you must to remain in balance. None of us will mock or belittle you for doing so because we’ve all been in your position before.”
“Of course,” Selina declared with a gasp. “That’s it. The nightmare and psychic attack has unbalanced my energy. I must rebalance it. Please help me lie down.”
Izanami and Myra helped Selina lay back on her cushion, allowing her arms to lie at her sides. “Is that good?” Myra queried.
“Perfect,” Selina purred softly. “Now just leave me be. I need to focus on my purr and pray.”
“Right,” Izanami answered. “If you need us, we’ll be right here.”
“That’s fine,” Selina purred. “Some silence would be golden.” Everyone around Selina fell silent as she closed her eyes and started purring. At the same time, she prayed silently asking for help and guidance about how to deal with the strange new sensations she was now feeling coming from Hannibal. The answer to her prayers didn’t take long. Within ten minutes, she visibly relaxed as the tension melted away with her purr. Five minutes later, she fell dead asleep, not having realized how exhausted she was.
“Wow,” Sakura breathed. “Look at how peaceful she looks. It’s nothing like what she looked like when she woke up.”
“True,” Izanami whispered. “She’s now truly starting to adapt to our world and is beginning to realize what’s really going on here. However, her dream truly concerns me. The Emperor only uses the Avatar tortures on those he truly wishes to annihilate. When he does that, he uses every depraved means of torture he can think of. I pray that Selina’s god somehow shields her link to her husband if this truly happens, otherwise we may see her mind destroyed by what she experiences through her link to her husband. I don’t want to see that happen.”
“But we mustn’t forget the prophecy, Izanami,” Myra replied quietly. “He will survive and we’ll see him in here in not a clone avatar, but in a physical mutation of his male form. We must prepare Selina for that eventuality. You saw how upset she was about the dream. She must be made to understand that whatever happens to his form will not change who his mind, soul, and spirit is. Minds can be expunged from clone avatars, and physical mutation can be reversed with the proper tech. Selina needs to see the bigger picture here and until she does, the thought of Hannibal being mutated into his female counterpart will torment her.”
“You’re so right,” Izanami agreed. “All we can do is be here for her when she feels his tortures and when the terrible mutation of his original form actually happens. If we can keep the Emperor from destroying that precious link she has to her husband, she’ll survive and so will he. Though I dread the thought of what her husband may endure before the end of this.”
“All we can do is pray to her god and Fate for Hannibal’s survival,” Sakura stated. “When Nemesis came to treat Chizu, I believed in her god at that point. He will not let her or Hannibal down. I feel there’s something going on here that’s bigger than all of us. We’re just bit players in this drama. Our job is to help Selina and Hannibal in whatever way we can, and that’s what I’m going to do.”
“Me too, sister,” Trinity chimed. “For the first time since I was taken, I actually have hope. We must do all we can for them, even if the unthinkable happens.”
“So say we all,” Myra declared. “Selina is our sister now, and we will do what we must, as she will. I just pray it’s enough to turn the tide in this darkness we inhabit.”
Izanami stroked Selina’s hair gently and sighed. “We must have faith, sisters,” Izanami murmured. “It’s all we can do at this point…have faith and help Selina deal with whatever eventuality may come from all this. If we don’t, we’re all doomed, and the Emperor wins. We can’t let him destroy Selina’s light, no matter what happens. We must believe. It’s our only option now.”
“We do believe,” Myra chimed. Many of those gathered around reaffirmed Myra’s declaration and swore to protect Selina to their dying breaths.