Just a Rogue

Corinne

The swelling in my face is going to get worse before it gets better, but I know that my wolf healing will be kicking in soon. I’m very grateful that even if my wolf won’t let me shift, she will help heal me.

She doesn’t respond. She’s sulking, angry at me for putting myself back in this situation. But it doesn’t mean she won’t do everything she can to help, and I think that the pain is already diminishing a little. I know I have bruises all over from where he punched and kicked me, but I had been able to curl up enough to protect my abdomen, so the baby is fine.

Grace goes over to the supplies that I organized, and gets out some paper towels and a water bottle, and comes back over to where I am quietly chatting with Lynette and Nova. She begins tenderly dabbing at my lip, helping to clean me up while we talk.

I feel like I am walking a tightrope. I have to be so careful about what I say. I’m glad that Xavier apparently believed me, and he’s not currently screaming at me or hitting me, so I think that I’m good for now. I am pretty sure that he’ll keep me with him tonight, so I have to keep my eyes open for an opportunity to talk to the girls this afternoon.

I haven’t decided yet what to tell Grace. She loves us, but she loves him, and I’m not sure if it would really be safe to tell her very far in advance. I might have to wait until the battle actually begins, to warn her to submit immediately to save herself. It’s possible that telling her would basically be the same thing as telling Xavier. I don’t know if she could force herself to remain silent, knowing that he is about to be attacked. No. The more I think about it, the more I realize that she would not. She’d tell him. I have to wait, try to save her at the last second, probably after Xavier is already fighting. It breaks my heart, because I love Grace like a mother, but I can’t trust her with this information right now.

It looks like I’ll have to tell Lynette and Nova at the same time, because apparently they are required to remain handcuffed together all the time now. That didn’t used to be the case, but I guess that Xavier is paranoid enough that he didn’t want to take any chances that Lynette would run off, even with the hateful silver collar he makes her wear. I think this is my fault. If I ran away, there’s no reason to think that Lynette wouldn’t also try to do it. Their suffering is worse because of me. I hope that I can redeem myself by finding a way to save them when the battle starts.

I’d really like to tell Ruby first, because I’m pretty sure she is the most likely to take advantage of the pack’s offer, but the rest of the wolves aren’t even back yet. “Where’s everyone else?” I ask Grace, as she is finishing cleaning up my wounds.

“We were at the mountain cave this morning,” she says, then she seems like she is going to say something else and changes her mind. I’ll bet she was going to say that the cave had been marked by the pack, but I have to pretend complete ignorance about that. “We drove down,” she goes on, “and the rest are running. I think they’ll be here pretty soon.”

I look over at Nova. The poor little thing is sitting quietly as usual, just enduring the life that she is being forced to live, handcuffed to Lynette who is starting to nod off. Lynette looks so much worse than she did when I left a couple of weeks ago. She looks haggard and thin and pale, with dark circles under her eyes. That silver is making her sick, I can tell, not just hurting her throat. I’m really worried about her. I wonder if there’s any way to help her now, rather than having to wait until the pack arrives.

I ask Grace, “Are you all hungry? I have a lot of snacks that I swiped from the homeless shelter before I left.” I know that I can’t keep that food to myself now that they are here, no point in trying to keep a secret stash of goodies.

She smiles. “No, actually, we had burritos in the car on the way.”

“Oh!” I know how unusual that is, I’ll bet that Grace is the one who managed to convince Xavier to do it. “Well,” I say, getting up and grabbing my backpack, “shall I put all this stuff in the box with the other food?”

She takes the backpack and looks inside at the packages of trail mix and beef jerky and protein bars. “Oh, this is quite a lot. Good job, Corinne, this will help out. I’ll put it away.”

She walks over to the storage area, leaving me with Lynette and Nova. Xavier and Seth have their heads together, talking. Now might be my chance. I lower my voice to barely a whisper. “Are you all right?” I ask Lynette, not sure how to broach the topic. I want to know if she is really as weak as she seems.

Lynette shrugs, but Nova speaks up. “No, she is not okay,” the girl tells me, a slightly fierce expression on her normally meek face. “I think that collar is killing her.”

I feel my face crumple, but I force myself not to start crying. “Well, if you can just hang in there a little longer,” I whisper, “things might be changing soon.”

“What do you mean?” Lynette asks softly, but I don’t get the chance to answer.

There is a rustling at the entrance to the cave, the sound of the bushes as somebody enters, and Ruby’s mottled wolf comes ducking through the opening. The rest of the rogues have arrived.

Ruby

I’m the first to arrive, unsurprisingly, as always swifter than any of the others. The scents tell the story as I approach the cave. The first thing, the critical thing, is that there are no pack markings, thank goodness. At least here is a cave that they didn’t find. Hopefully this will give Xavier a chance to regroup and decide what we are going to do next, now that we have found a safe shelter.

I can smell that the others already arrived ahead of us as we expected, and they are waiting inside the cave.

What is not expected is the other scent that I smell. Corinne? Corinne has actually come back? Did they find her on their way here? Did Xavier kidnap her and force her to return? I can’t imagine that she returned voluntarily, nobody could possibly be that stupid.

I glance around as soon as I get inside, all of them looking towards the entrance, having heard my approach. It looks strangely peaceful and tidy in here. I know when we left it was chaos, Xavier commanding us to leave while he was still raging about Corinne’s disappearance. But someone has obviously cleaned up in here, and I know that the car Seth was driving couldn’t have gotten here all that long ago.

The other wolves start catching up to me, rolling down into the cave, and we all start shifting human. The entrance area of this cave is not really roomy enough for nine huge wolves. I see that my sleeping area contains a stack of tidy blankets and clothing so I go over there quickly, naked, and start getting dressed. The other wolves do the same.

I head over to where the other girls are sitting, where they have apparently just been quietly talking. I’m not surprised to see that Corinne’s face is injured, but what I wonder is how it happened. Did he beat her as he was forcing her into the car? It’s so strange, though, Corinne doesn’t look frantic or terrified, she’s eerily calm for someone who has presumably been abducted back into her worst nightmare.

“Hey, Ruby,” she says quietly as I sit down next to her, followed by Grace who has come from the storage area.

“Hey, what -” but before I can finish Xavier is speaking.

Everyone falls silent instantly, looking at him to see what he has to say.

He stands near the entrance, slightly backlit by the light filtering down through the bushes at the entrance. “All right,” he says, “as you see this cave is unpolluted. We’ll be staying here for at least a while. Seth and I are already starting to make some plans about how to deal with the pack. Hugh, I want you to join us. Grace, figure out if we have enough food for everyone to have something to eat tonight. Tomorrow some of you will be going out on a supply run.”

He pauses, and I wonder if he has any intention of mentioning the elephant in the room, Corinne sitting right here in the cave like she never left.

Then he adds, “Corinne realized she made a mistake and came back.” He sits back down with Seth and continues talking. Hugh shrugs and joins them. The other male wolves start settling down at their places, most of them glancing over at Corinne and murmuring to each other.

I stare at Corinne, confounded. “You came back?”

She nods and looks down at her hands, then meets my eyes.

I’m baffled, and look disbelievingly at Grace. Surely she’ll tell me what really happened. Grace murmurs, “Yes, Corinne was here when we arrived.”

“Why?” is all I can say.

Corinne sighs just a little. “I’m pregnant. I decided that I was going to need help, I couldn’t do it alone. And it wouldn’t be fair to keep the baby away from his father.”

I am completely flabbergasted. Really? I’ve been pregnant, we probably all have, but the first time we shift it ends. “Why didn’t you just shift?” I ask her, and the other ladies turn to her for her answer.

“I can’t,” she says softly, shaking her head. “My wolf won’t let me.”

Oh.

Grace says, in a voice filled with emotion, “Then this was meant to be, sweetheart, if your wolf wants to protect the baby, that’s a sign.”

Corinne looks down sadly, but she nods. Damn, she came back for Xavier to help raise her baby? No wonder she looks sad. I mean, I guess if her wolf is committed to keeping the baby, maybe it makes sense to have the father participate? But Xavier? That monster? He’s the last person on earth who should be raising a baby. I thought Corinne was smarter than this.

“Um, Grace,” she says, changing the subject, “do you think it would be all right if I go outside to pee?” I see why she’s asking - Xavier is probably going to be more insanely controlling than ever now.

Grace nods, and says, “Come on, I’ll go with you.”

They get up and start crossing to the entrance, and Xavier immediately looks up. “Where do you think you’re going?”

Grace leans down and whispers into his ear where he is sitting with Seth and Hugh. I hear him tell her, “Fine, but I want you to stay in here and keep an eye on the other girls.” He raises his voice and meets my eyes. “Ruby, you go with Corinne outside.”

Good, maybe I’ll get the chance to ask her what the hell she’s thinking, coming back to Xavier, bringing a baby into this mess.

She precedes me out the entrance, then moves a short distance away, around the side of the little hill that conceals the cave. When we have gotten to a clear spot I expect her to squat, but instead she glances around, grabs my arm, and whispers, “Ruby, please listen, we don’t have much time.”

What is this?

“I have to trust you, Ruby, please, don’t tell anyone else what I’m about to say. I’m trying to save your life.”

I stare at her. Okay, obviously something even crazier is going on than I realized. “Okay,” I murmur. If she has secret information to share with me, I’m certainly not going to go telling anyone else. Maybe this is finally going to be my sign that it’s time to go. “You can trust me,” I add when she hesitates.

“I actually came back to warn you,” she says. “The pack near here is going to attack in a day or two. They let me come back just to help the she-wolves get out of the way. If you submit immediately, they won’t hurt you.”

I gape at her, speechless. What the fuck?

She finally unbuttons her jeans, saying, “Sorry, I actually do have to pee,” and she squats to relieve herself while I am trying to digest what she just told me. “Being pregnant makes you need to a lot.”

All I can blurt out is, “Oh, you’re actually pregnant? That’s not just some kind of cover story?”

She finishes, and stands back up. “No, I really am,” she says, fastening her pants. “But I came back to try to save you, and Lynette and Nova. Even Grace if I can.”

I glance around. If we’re out here much longer someone will come looking for us. I whisper, “Grace’ll tell him.”

“I know,” she says, “I’ll have to wait til the last minute to warn her to submit when it happens. You’re the first one I’ve told. I’ll have to find a way to tell Lynette and Nova.”

I frown. “That’ll be hard,” I point out, but I’m already thinking ahead. I don’t want to wait. I believe her completely, this is happening, she’d never come up with a crazy story like this. This is it. This is the sign. Time to go.

She can tell what I’m thinking. She grabs my arm again. “Please don’t go yet. It would be too obvious. If you can get away, the pack is keeping someone stationed a couple of miles from here. If you go submit to them, and cooperate with whatever they ask, they might give us a chance to stay in this area. Like, to not be rogues any more.”

I stop the spiral my mind was already engaging in, already planning where to go, what to do, how to live alone. Is this a chance to actually settle down in an area, get away from the whole rogue lifestyle? Like, get a job? A home? If the pack allows me to remain in their territory, I could start living a real life. I feel a strange rush of emotion. It feels so alien, normally I keep tight control over my feelings. I don’t have time to ask a million questions, though, we have to get back inside. All I say is, “Where?”

“A trailhead,” she tells me quickly, and gives me enough information to know exactly where she means. It’s outside of Trinidad, a couple miles away, a little used area.

“Let’s go back,” I say, walking to the entrance, then add, “Thank you.” This is a remarkable act of courage on her part, and I admire her more than I ever expected to. I don’t have time to tell her any of that.

She nods, then whispers, “Good luck” before ducking back under the bush.