SWNOVELS Jinxed: Chapter 6
a male penguin falls in love with a female penguin, he’ll comb the beach for a perfectly smooth pebble to present to her as a proposal.
Seahorses get “married,” swimming with their tails entwined.
I had never been lucky enough to experience a love like this. But it was nice to imagine such a thing, wasn’t it? And now I was here, trapped in this house for eternity. It would never happen. Instead, it would be me and my books until one of us rotted.
I was pretty sure it would be me crumbling to dust first, my books sitting on the shelf for the next sad soul to come tripping into the house.
But these facts cycled in my brain as I turned away from Theo and the new girl–Savannah–to meet Felix in the living room.
Puffins mate for life and raise a single baby together each mating season. Beavers spend as much time bonding with their life partners as they do building their dams.
Maybe this girl, this woman, would be my chance. Maybe not, considering she had been in the house for an hour, maybe two at most, and was already fucking Theo’s brains out in his makeshift basement brewery. Not like I could blame the poor kid. He had been stuck in here for far less time than either of us, and was the youngest when he was cursed as well. At least I had lived a good chunk of my life before this. Love had never been involved. Definitely not the kind of love I read about in the books that lined the library walls.
For the first decade, I had moped around, pissing off Felix more and more with every word I spoke. I wasn’t sure our relationship was ever repairable. Two people should never be trapped for so long with only each other. Maybe if we were on the outside, it would be different. Probably not, but we wouldn’t be stuck together, two opposite ends of a magnet being forced to interact.
I had always known the library existed, but in my second decade here, I grew desperate enough to explore it. I fell in love with the dark space, the faded chairs, and the sweeping walls of bookcases. I started with the encyclopedias, moving on to the classics that would be worth thousands in used books stores–if anyone could ever get their hands on them. And then I read them all again. And again. The library became my sanctuary. The facts became weights to keep me grounded to reality, as if knowing what happened in the outside world made me a part of everything passing me by. Looking at life in the black and white helped me process things that felt impossible to comprehend.
It’s impossible to hum while you hold your nose. Newborns can’t cry tears.
I was trapped inside a cursed house. And Savannah was the prettiest woman I had ever seen in my life. I could see why Felix had been so preoccupied with her, and why Theo had seduced her. I could also understand how Theo had been the one she chose. He was easy, in a way Felix and I would never be. It seemed like people would naturally gravitate towards Theo. I was jealous of him for that, but I had never been quite as jealous as when I saw Savannah straightening her clothes as she stood, the smell of sex heavy in the air.
For humans, sex was a survival mechanism. I knew it as clearly as I knew my name, and what my face looked like in the cloudy mirrors. After all, seeking pleasure was one of the strongest human instincts. When everything you’ve known was shaken up, it was only natural for two young, good-looking people to bond physically. Sexually.
And fuck if I didn’t want to be him. What would it feel like to have her roll her hips against me, moaning my name as she came on my cock? Would it be like everything I had been imagining my entire life?
“Cat got your tongue?”
I shook my head, ridding myself of the dangerous thoughts, and turning my attention to Felix. He stood by the unlit fireplace, arms crossed in front of his chest. Theo didn’t like us lighting the fireplace, not that it mattered. We had never really used it before he arrived, either. Our resources were limited, and what was the point in burning wood? The living room was over the top, which was probably why we never used it. Everything was either heavy and dark, or ornate and uncomfortable. Not to mention a living room was where you were supposed to spend time with your family, and we were far from a family. We could also hardly call existing here living.
“Theo was fucking her,” I muttered, stopping myself from elaborating. “He was fucking Savannah, in the basement.”
I expected Felix to look pissed, angry Theo was already messing with the house dynamics. They were unstable, sure, but they were still there all the same. Instead, I saw something unexpected flash across his eyes. Jealousy. I had to have imagined it, because Felix was a man of few emotions, and fewer words. I guessed living in a house for almost a hundred years on your own would do that to you. As soon as it was there, it was gone, his face reverting back to the emotionless mask I had grown used to seeing. “He should know better. We can’t afford for them to fall madly in love, then decide they hate each other.”
“Absolutely.” Felix and I agreed on very little, if at all. On this, I was fully on his side. Mainly because I didn’t want Savannah to fall in love with Theo. I wanted her to fall in love with me, to share my bed at night. Apparently, Felix wanted the same. And if we all wanted her…none of us should have her. It would only ever end in disaster. The hurt feelings and emotions on overdrive while the four of us were trapped inside this prison would end in one of us murdering the rest. I was certain of it. “Although, if I were his age and a girl who looked like Savannah showed up here…”
Felix’s words were sharp, cutting through the stagnant air. “And how exactly does Savannah look, Luther? Like your daughter? Because she’s sure as hell younger than I am.”
I was an absolute idiot. How could I have been so stupid to think Savannah would go for someone like me? I looked positively ancient compared to Theo’s boyish good looks. That wasn’t even taking into account my house age. And to let my feelings slip to Felix, of all people, was a rookie mistake. I tried to play it off, shrugging my shoulders. “I only meant she’s a pretty girl. That’s all. Anyone can see that.”
“Anyone can see what?” A sweet voice interrupted our conversation. I narrowed my eyes at Felix. Savannah didn’t need to know all of our dirty secrets on day one.
I spun around to greet her with a smile, my grin nearly dropping when I saw her hand in hand with Theo. As if she could sense my discomfort, she dropped his hand and stepped slightly away. Theo, as usual, was shirtless. If he hadn’t arrived in the dead of winter, I would’ve doubted he had ever shown up with a shirt in the first place. “Nothing of importance.”
“Mmhmm…” she mumbled, and immediately dropped her eyes to the floor. Fuck. I was a dick.
I opened my mouth to apologize, but Theo immediately cut me off. “What’s the big happy family meeting for anyways?”
“I take it these meetings aren’t common then?” Savannah asked, turning away from me and back to Theo.
Turn back, I wanted to say. Look at me again. Give me a chance. I thought we shared a glance in the basement, but her current body language was telling me otherwise. I must have been mistaken, hope clouding my judgment. God, what I wouldn’t give for one more look.
The symptoms of cabin fever were easily spotted. I learned the signs from my books long after I had recovered from them. Trouble sleeping. Change in appetite (not like this was a problem…). Lack of patience. Trouble concentrating. Those last two returned full force the moment I laid eyes on Savannah in the basement. I felt like a man possessed, ironic considering I was in a haunted house. And yet I wasn’t a ghost. I was flesh and bone, with the same earthly needs as anyone else.
“Not quite,” Theo responded. Felix covered up a laugh behind me, and I didn’t have to look at him to know he was rolling his eyes. You learned everything there was to know about a person after a few years of no outside interaction. The same with your surroundings. I could navigate this room with my eyes closed. The worn velvet couch, facing the brick fireplace where Felix stood. The hardwood stretching from wall to wall, shiny in some places, dull in others. Walls covered in a dark green wallpaper, decorated with roses of the deepest red. Sometimes they were romantic when I stared at them. Sometimes they reminded me of blood, taunting me with a reality I would never again experience. The lights in the room were dim, but they were better than before, and definitely better than nothing. Before I got here, Felix had still been living with the original copper wiring. Luckily, I had picked up a thing or two from my electrician father when I was young, and it had stuck with me.
“What Theo means,” I said, rejoicing inside when Savannah looked at me once more. “Is that after you’ve lived with the same people long enough, house meetings aren’t really necessary. You know more about each other than you could ever care to know.”
Savannah nodded, blinking slowly. She was tugging on a tendril of hair that had come loose from her bun, and I wanted to peer inside her mind and see exactly what she was thinking. How was she processing this insane situation? On the outside, she seemed completely calm.
I couldn’t stop myself from asking. “What’s on your mind, sweetheart?”
She cocked her head to the side, as if to analyze me. It was disconcerting. I was used to being the person analyzing things, not the other way around. “I’m trying to figure out why I’m not more freaked out. Shouldn’t I be losing my mind? None of this makes sense, and yet my brain is just accepting what the three of you are telling me.”
“It’s the magic of the house,” Felix interjected, somewhat sarcastically. “Come and take a seat. I’m sure that’s not your only question.”
Savannah nodded and walked towards the couch. She brushed against my body as she passed, and I couldn’t help but shiver at the electric touch. I had obviously gone too long without human contact, and my body automatically responded. When I looked up, Theo gave me a funny look. Shit. I really needed to hide my emotions better when Savannah was involved, otherwise all three of us wouldn’t survive. If you could call what we were doing survival. It was a stretch at best.
“Doesn’t anyone come looking for you?” she asked.
It was something I had to wrap my head around too, when I first entered. How does no one realize we’re trapped in here?
I sighed, knowing she wouldn’t like the answer. “Felix explained it to me like this. If people care enough about you, they’ll be able to find you. Otherwise, people merely stumble upon us. Teenagers, mostly. Daring each other to step on the front porch. We’ve gotten pretty good at scaring them off.”
Savannah’s eyes shuddered. “Hence the haunted house rumors.”
“Exactly.” I knew what she was processing now, her mind scanning what I had just said. That no one cared about us enough to come find us. Maybe if we were lucky, she had a boyfriend who would come looking. Although, judging by the events of the basement, I guessed not.
Theo and I joined Felix and Savannah in front of the fireplace. Theo perched on the arm of the sofa, his foot propped up, his knee sticking out to bump Savannah’s shoulder. Their touch was so casual and easy…what was I missing? I took a seat in one of the old leather wing chairs that edged the room.
Felix nodded towards Savannah. “The magic of the house is quite simple, and incredibly complex at the same time. Once you enter the house, you can’t leave. You essentially became a part of the house when you crossed the threshold. That’s why it doesn’t feel strange to you. Your logic wants to fight it, to contradict what we’re telling you with reason and facts. But your heart and soul know better. They can feel the house in your veins, pulsing through your lifeblood.”
I watched her carefully as she examined her arms in silence, looking for the non-existent entrance the house had captured her through. I knew what Felix meant. You sensed it the moment the curse hit you. The feeling of no longer being alone in your thoughts. The sensation you were no longer an autonomous being.
She shook her head, more bits of hair flying loose from the messy bun. “So absolutely nothing can come in or out? What about mice? Bees? Flies?”
“Look around you, darling.” My heart contracted at the pet name Felix used so effortlessly, not that he could tell–or cared. “Do you see any creatures in here besides us?”
“No. But it still doesn’t make sense. Shouldn’t the house be filled with things that can’t leave? Or die?” Her forehead creased with the last word she spoke, and I longed to kiss her concern away.
This time, it was Theo’s turn to shrug. “It’s like they can all tell something’s off with the house. Not even my distillery in the basement attracts them. Spooky, when you think about it. That animals and insects can sense something wrong when all four of us couldn’t.”
“I loved the house the minute I saw it,” Savannah murmured, and I strained to hear her whisper. “The realtor tried to talk me out of it. The lawyer, too. But I thought this house was my dream come true. Everything I had ever wanted…”
We were all quiet now, processing her truth in our own ways. I was sure for all of us, one way or another, this house was supposed to be a sanctuary of sorts. A safe haven. “There was a beetle that got in, what was it…five years ago now?” I suggested with a smile, an attempt to change the mood.
Theo laughed. “Yes! We followed that fucking thing everywhere for days.”
Savannah giggled behind her hand. She was fucking gorgeous. “A beetle was your entertainment? You must be kidding me.”
“Listen,” I said. “We’re bored as hell here most of the time. So anything out of the ordinary, like you showing up, or a beetle finding its way in, is crazy exciting. That beetle was basically like our pet.”
“I can’t believe I’m being compared to a beetle.” She grinned. “Wait. Was? What happened to it?”
I chewed my lip. “Um. Well.”
“I stepped on it,” Felix answered for me, blunt as ever. “I didn’t realize where he was, and I flew down the stairs one morning. And…”
Savannah’s smile fell. “So you can die then. Inside the house. But how does that make sense? You’re almost 150 years old.”
Felix tapped his fingers against his thigh, a nervous habit I had long come to recognize. I wasn’t sure which part of this situation was making him uncomfortable. “You can…” he trailed off, and then started again. “We’ve deduced that inside the house you can’t die of things like starvation or thirst. Lack of sleep. But if you were to get sick or injured…there’s nothing that can be done.”
“So what do you guys eat if you can’t starve to death? And what’s the point in Theo making hooch in the basement?” She looked around the room, seeing her surroundings for the first time. “Do you even have a fridge in here? How do you survive in a Victorian house?”
“Edwardian, technically,” I piped up. “The house was built in 1907, so it’s an Edwardian house.”
Savannah narrowed her eyes at me. “The realtor told me no one knew, or cared, what came after Victorian, so they lumped it all together.”
“Yes, well, the realtor told you wrong.” I smiled, even though internally I was kicking myself for thinking she’d find it interesting.
“How old are you exactly?”
I laughed. “Does it matter?” Would she be completely turned off once she realized I was old enough to be her father? Technically, so was Theo, but he didn’t look it.
She nodded. “It does to me.”
I sighed. “I’m 45. Have been since 1975. Will be for the next thousand years too.”
I watched her eyes widen as she processed the information. Bad? Good? I was desperate to know.
“Anyway,” Felix interrupted. “No fridge. But again, food isn’t necessary.” He looked away from her for a moment, and then pinned her with his gaze again. To my surprise, she stared right back at him, unblinking. “Think of the curse like the tale of vampires. We don’t age inside the house, but we also do not require sustenance. We essentially exist outside of time, our bodies frozen from the moment the curse takes effect. As for Theo’s hooch…”
“Gotta survive somehow, sweet girl.” Theo winked at her, and I half expected her to swoon right under our noses. “Although I am getting down to my last few cans of fruit. Don’t know what I’ll do after that.”
“I don’t even want to think about a sober Theo,” I muttered, but Theo only grinned at me.
Savannah ticked things off on her fingers. “Okay, so no creatures. You can die, but not of old age. No food, but Theo likes alcohol. Am I missing anything?”
“One more,” Felix leveled her with a sharp look. “No fraternizing with the housemates…sexually. We’re all stuck together, and that could only ever end in misery for all of us.”
For the first time, I saw Savannah’s backbone. She squared her shoulders, refusing to back down. “You can’t be serious.” She shot a quick glance around the room, briefly catching my eye as if to ask me, did you tell him? “You can’t seriously think you can tell me what to do.”
Felix darted over to her, taking Savannah’s chin into his hand in a possessive way I had never seen before. His voice was deadly quiet. “From this point on. No. Fucking. Fraternizing. Are we clear?”
“Crystal,” Savannah spat, still shooting daggers.
I watched their interaction, a long-dormant fire alighting deep inside my core. I didn’t even care it was happening with Felix, not me, because I was so captivated. Savannah wasn’t afraid–of anything–and that was sexy as hell. A new fact to add to my mental notebook. Savannah was the prettiest woman I had ever seen, and I had never wanted someone as badly as I wanted her.