In Ruins: A Dark High School Bully Romance (A Black Falls High Novel Book 1)

“I heard about what happened in the cafeteria,” Jamie called out in a soft voice as she sat on my bed.

I was curled up into a tight ball, vowing to remain there until forced out. After I’d left the cafeteria, I’d gone home. I couldn’t face being in classes after that. I’d been hiding out beneath my covers ever since.

I grunted an answer, clutching my blankets around me tighter.

“Rosalie, come on. Talk to me,” Jamie pleaded.

“What’s there to talk about? Juliet humiliated me today.”

“I heard Fox Evans came to your rescue though. That had to have been the silver lining.”

I knew she was trying to make the situation better considering everyone loved Fox, but it wasn’t helping. I hadn’t loved him since we were kids and he’d broken my heart.

“It’s just fuel on an already burning building,” I groaned, finally sitting up. “He stuck up for me. Or at least got me out from beneath Juliet’s high heel. But that only means she’ll gun for me more now since Prince Charming just made her look bad in front of everyone.”

“Oh.” Jamie grimaced, her nose wrinkling as she realized the implications.

“Yeah, oh.”

“We’re almost done with high school, Rosalie—”

I snorted. “We’re a month into our senior year, Jamie. It’s a long time until graduation. If we even make it out alive. At this rate, the mean team is looking to grill us alive.”

“But think of how awesome it’ll be once we’re out,” she pressed, her dark eyes hopeful. “You got your full ride to Pendleton. You’ve wanted to go Ivy League since I met you back during freshman year. It’s your first-choice college. You made it in, and you’ve already received a full ride. You’re graduating at the top of our class. Forget about what those assholes say or do. They won’t make it half as far in life as you will.”

I gave her a watery smile. Ivy League wasn’t my dream. It was my dad’s. I only pretended it was mine to make it easier. I wanted to have a career in music. I loved singing. When I’d mentioned I might be interested in pursuing it past high school, an ugly, bulging vein surfaced on my dad’s forehead, causing me to back away with a weak laugh, citing I was only kidding. It didn’t stop the lecture about how music and the arts were a complete waste of time and effort. He even told me if I kept it up with wanting to do it, he wouldn’t help me pay for it. I’d have to figure out how to fund my education on my own. It was go big or stay home and live in my parents’ basement. So, I studied my ass off to get into his dream school. Letting my dad down wasn’t an option. I never told anyone about my love of music. Except Jamie. I told Jamie everything. But it always hurt too much to admit my love of music wouldn’t be a part of my future.

Pushing those feelings down, I pulled her in for a quick hug.

“Thanks, Jamie.” I wiped at my eyes as we broke apart. “I think I needed to hear that.”

“Don’t worry, sis. I got you.” She grinned at me. “Now, let’s forget about those jerks, order in some pizza, and watch a movie. We can be bums for tonight.”

“Don’t you need to study for chemistry?” I gave her a quizzical look.

Her lips tilted down, the scowl overshadowing any joy she had. “Girl, I’m already doomed. Save yourself and don’t worry about me. I’ll be lucky if I can pull a D out of that class.”

“A D is passing,” I offered, my voice squeaking.

Jamie let out a laugh. “You’d freak out if you ever got a D. Or the D.” Her eyes sparkled with laughter as she waggled her brows at me.

I cringed at her mention of sex. Jamie was as bad as I was. Neither of us had gotten any. She said she was holding out for the perfect guy and that it’d be special. She was so adamant about her desire for perfection, she’d been a revolving door with dates, hoping to find the one.

“I’ll get no D, grades or other, as long as I’m at this school. Studying is the only thing that keeps me from going nuts. Plus, everyone knows what a loser I am.” I frowned down at a piece of lint I’d been picking at.

“You’re not a loser, Rosalie. You’re beautiful. That’s probably why Juliet hates you—”

“If I were beautiful, I’d be in Juliet’s spot, not her doormat.”

“Would you want Juliet’s spot?”

I shook my head. “Good point. I hate Fox. I hate all the people she hangs out with. I’d be the worst Juliet ever.”

Jamie chuckled. “To be fair, I think you could enjoy it if you let yourself go. I mean, not only is there Fox, but there’s also Ethan Masters, Cole Scott, and Enzo De Luca.” She ticked off the names of Fox’s best friends and crew. There were more guys in their group, but those four were known as the Four Horsemen. A name they took to heart whenever it was mentioned.

They were gods in the school, each on the football team. They were the most popular guys. Every one of them was panty-dropping gorgeous. Juliet had already laid claim to Fox, but the others were still up for grabs if a girl was fast enough to nab one. Everyone knew the guys liked to mess around with lots of girls. Fox was the only one tied down by one.

“I don’t stand a snowball’s chance in hell with any of them,” I scoffed. I’d only been kissed once in my life and that had been by Fox. Now that I’d been on my knees for Juliet, there was no way in hell anyone would want me. They’d get attacked just for being with me. I could appreciate no one wanting that for themselves.

“I think you could. I think if you stood up for yourself, you’d be a force to be reckoned with.”

“You’re nuts. Did you get high in chemistry or something?” I raised a brow at her.

She shrugged. “I just think you don’t give yourself enough credit, Rosalie. You’re pretty. You always keep yourself under wraps, hiding in your oversized hoodies. Let them see what they’re screwing with. Start your own posse. Or take over Juliet’s. Maybe even get revenge on her so she knows not to mess with you.”

“OK, you’re crazy.” I laughed, chucking my pillow at her. She caught it and grinned at me. “You need to stay away from the coffee.”

We both laughed, but something about Jamie’s words struck a chord with me. All my life, I’d wanted to be more. Maybe I had something to prove to Fox. He’d left me, saying we were growing apart. That I wasn’t cool enough. That he needed space.

I could be cool. 

Or maybe I could continue to daydream about it.

I WOKE with a groan the following morning. The sunlight streamed in through my open curtains. Instead of tugging my blankets back over my head, I trudged to my feet and went to my bedroom window to close the curtains. I froze as my hands reached their destination.

Fox lived next door to me. Our bedroom windows faced one another. When we were kids, we’d sit at our windows and wave goodnight to each other. Since the day he walked away from me, his curtains had been closed.

Today, they were wide open, giving me a view of his shirtless torso as he moved around his room. He looked like he’d been carved by the gods, all tight lines and hard planes of muscle hugging his body. His dark hair was a mess, his mouth turned down into the brooding look I remembered from when we were kids. He often wore it when something was troubling him.

A pang of worry for him set over me, but I pushed it away. I wanted to thank him for helping me out. Maybe he’d be useful if Juliet came back for revenge. It was worth a shot, even if I was feeling tongue-tied just thinking about approaching him.

I was so intent on thinking of ways to approach him and thank him for his help that I didn’t realize I was still staring out my window at him.

His blue eyes met mine. The embarrassment of being caught staring at him raced over my skin, blanketing me in warmth.

His eyes narrowed at me for a moment before he moved to his window. I held my breath, wondering if he’d slide it open and shout over at me like he’d done when we were kids.

Instead, he stopped at the glass, his eyes boring into mine, before he snapped his curtains closed.

“Shit,” I whispered, clutching at my chest. That had been intense. Feeling weird from being caught staring, I made my way to my bathroom and showered. Despite my current situation, I sang while scrubbing my hair. I let the warm water pelt me. The words to a new song I was working on came pouring out of me.

Once done, I went to my closet and rifled through my clothes. Jamie was right. I did wear a lot of hoodies and oversized clothes. I rummaged around in the depths before unearthing a pair of skinny jeans and a black turtleneck my mom had gotten me for Christmas. I’d stuffed them into the back of closet because the turtleneck hinted at my abdomen, the slight sliver of skin making me panic. Since the jeans were low rise, that made the sliver of skin even worse.

But today was a new day. I wanted to look confident, like none of the shit that had gone on bothered me. I’d never let them break me. I’d vowed it when I was twelve and Fox had left me, and I was vowing it still.

I put the outfit on and pulled my long red curls back into a high ponytail then surveyed myself in the mirror. If I didn’t know better, I’d think I was one of the pretty, popular girls. I forced a smile onto my face. The smile was a damn lie, but Mom always taught me to keep smiling regardless of the storms tormenting me.

I dabbed on pink lip gloss and some mascara before slipping my feet into leopard print ballet flats. They seemed like a safe bet. At least I wouldn’t break my ass in them. Well, with any luck.

I snatched up my backpack and bounded downstairs. Mom had breakfast going. Dad was already shoveling eggs into his mouth while trying to read the morning paper. It was the usual breakfast routine.

“Morning, honey.” Mom glanced at me as she placed a piece of toast next to my scrambled eggs and handed me the plate. My stomach rumbled at the smell of Mom’s pancakes.

“Morning.” I took the plate from her and sat in my spot at the table.

“How was school yesterday?” Dad looked at me over the top of his paper. It was times like these that I wished I had a sibling they could focus on. My parents were great, but they were also always pushing me to be better.

“Fine,” I mumbled around a mouthful of fluffy eggs, my eyes on my plate.

“Then why did we get a call from school saying you missed afternoon classes?” Dad folded his paper and placed it on the table, his gaze leveled on me.

I fidgeted in my seat, chewing slowly. I didn’t want to tell them about the trouble I had with Juliet. I never told them. They’d be at the school in a heartbeat, making everything a million times worse. That potential kept me painfully silent.

“Rosalie, is something going on we should worry about?” Mom sat at the other end of the table with her breakfast, worry in her eyes.

“You know you need to maintain your grades to keep your scholarship to Pendleton. I won’t have you screwing up your future by skipping classes,” Dad ground out, his eyes narrowed at me. “This better not be related to music, either. I already told you—”

“It’s not that. I-I started my period,” I blurted out, wincing. It seemed like a good safety net, so I took the leap. “I-I had nothing on me to help, so I came home. The cramps were killing me.”

Dad wrinkled his nose. “I see. Well, that’s fine. I, uh, need to go.”

I breathed out a sigh of relief. Dad hated girl talk. If I ever wanted to get rid of him, I just had to mention my period, bras, or anything related to the two, and he’d vacate a room.

“Do you have enough tampons?” Mom asked. “I’m going to the store today. I can pick you up some.”

“Thanks, Mom. That’d be great.” I gave her a quick smile that she returned. I wasn’t sure what was worse, the guilt eating at me over lying to my parents or going to school and facing my tormentors. Both were stressing me out.

“Done so soon?” Mom’s stare followed me as I walked to the counter and put my plate up.

“Yeah, my stomach is upset. I think I just need to get to school.”

“OK, hon. I’ll see you tonight. Have a great day!”

I gave her a hug, grabbed my bag, and walked out to my car. Why couldn’t my dad just be proud of me and my love of music? He treated it like it was a disease. Hell, he’d never even heard or seen me perform. He’d never given me a chance. When I’d been cast as the lead in the musical freshman year, he made me drop out.

Sighing, I slid behind the wheel of my new car. My parents had gotten it for me as an early graduation and eighteenth birthday gift. They wanted me to have something nice for when I left for college. Something reliable. I loved it. It was my small piece of freedom. Like anything else, it came at a price. Good grades. Pendleton. My love for it only extended to my hatred of all the things I had to do to keep it.

I climbed behind the steering wheel and started the engine. A glance across the lawn had me watching Fox as he came outside wearing a tight, black t-shirt, low-slung jeans and aviator sunglasses. His hair was a perfect mess. I swallowed, wondering if now would be a good time to thank him. I was just about to open my door when he got into his blacked-out Jeep and reversed out of the driveway.

Sighing and cursing myself for being a wuss, I backed out of my driveway and followed a few cars behind him to school. He wheeled his Jeep into the spot deemed his and hopped out. Ethan was already standing on the sidewalk, waiting for him. I watched from my car at the back of the lot as they gave each other some weird guy handshake. Enzo joined them a few moments later. His jet-black hair was styled in his signature faux hawk. Enzo was Italian. The girls in school liked to joke and call him an Italian stallion, a phrase he apparently lived up to.

The guys gathered in a small circle, laughing and talking. Soon, Cole, the blond hair, blue-eyed heartthrob, joined them. Cole always looked like he just stepped off the beach with his hair a windswept mess. I’d never interacted with any of them except for Fox.

Steeling myself, I got out of my car. I’d thank Fox. The mean queen wasn’t around, so I should be good. At least that’s what I told myself as I strode across the parking lot, my focus on the guys. Before I realized it, I was standing next to them.

Enzo was the first to notice. His dark eyes roamed over me. Butterflies banged to life in my belly. He probably didn’t have a clue who I even was unless he kept up with who Juliet and her squad of plastic tormented. Since her list of victims was long, I doubted I stood out.

“Check it out. Cafeteria girl,” Enzo said, putting to bed any idea he didn’t know who I was.

Fox frowned at me while Ethan and Cole surveyed me with something that looked like both disgust and intrigue.

“Um, Fox?” My voice was stronger than I expected, which helped to calm me. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

Fox’s blue-eyed gaze roved over me before he snickered. “Not a chance, freak.”

The heat rose in my cheeks as I stared back at him. I wasn’t sure what to do. I hadn’t expected he’d be such a jerk. I shifted my backpack on my shoulder, feeling awkward.

“You can talk to me,” Cole called out as I backed away. “I love a girl who’s willing to get on her knees to lick my shoes.”

“Perhaps some other time,” I choked out, trying to keep some of my dignity.

The backs of my eyes burned. There was no winning with these people. While I’d never had an encounter with the male population of the elite, I hadn’t figured they’d be such assholes. Guess silence didn’t make someone a good person. It just made them a bystander.

Don’t let them see you cry.

I turned on my heel and fled, not stopping until I made it to the second-floor girls’ bathroom. Once locked inside my stall, I let the waterworks flow.

At least no one but them was around to see my humiliation in the parking lot.

It was the only assurance I had. I took the small victory and clung to it.

It took me twenty minutes to get myself together. I’d only missed homeroom. With my head down, I made my way to my locker and gathered my books for calculus.

When I turned around, I came face to face with Fox.

“Fox?” I gasped, backing up and hitting my locker. He leveled his icy blue stare on me. I swallowed hard, wondering if this was a cruel joke.

“What the hell did you want this morning?”

Surprised, I floundered for words. “I-I,”

“C’mon, Rosie. Out with it.” The use of the nickname he’d given me when we were six years old playing in his backyard came rushing back like the force of a hurricane.

“Rosie! You can’t catch me!’ six-year-old Fox shouted, his eyes bright with amusement.

I ran faster, trying to catch him during the game of tag. His mom cheered me on in the background. Fox swerved to the left, using his peewee football moves on me. But I knew his moves. I followed and knocked him to the ground, both of us breathless as I landed on top of him, pining his arms. ‘Looks like you lost,’ I taunted.

He sighed, his chest heaving from the run. ‘There’s always next time.’

The sound of his heavy exhale snapped me out of my trip down memory lane. My breath caught in my throat as I stared up at his towering form.

“I only wanted to thank you for helping me in the cafeteria.”

His expression softened as he gazed down at me. “You disappointed me.”

“What?” I wasn’t sure if I’d heard him right.

“I never thought I’d see you let someone break you like that. It was sickening. You looked pathetic on your knees.”

I bristled at his words. “And I never thought you’d turn into such an asshole. I guess we’re both disappointed, huh?”

“I did you a favor, Rosie. You owe me for it.” His gaze darkened.

“I don’t owe you shit,” I hissed up at him, feeling brave. “You put me through hell. If anyone owes anyone, it’s you who owes me.” I jabbed my finger in his chest for emphasis, not sure where my courage was coming from, but not wanting to back down.

He reached out and grabbed my hand, closing his large one around it. I winced beneath his tight grip.

“You should’ve stayed a nobody, Rosie.” He tugged me so close our bodies pressed against one another.

“I’m still a nobody,” I rasped, my heart hammering in my chest at his nearness.

He let out a soft chuckle, his warm breath tickling my face. “You were until you got my attention again. Such a bad girl.”

I shivered against him. He had my back pressed against the lockers once more.

“I like this look on you,” he continued, brushing a stray piece of hair away from my face. “And your hair.” His eyes swept over my red mane in its high ponytail. “It was always my favorite.”

I swallowed down a whimper, my breath hitching as he leaned down to murmur in my ear, “Do you know what happens to bad girls, Rosie?”

“No,” I choked out.

“They get ruined.” His lips brushed against the shell of my ear. “The next time you’re on your knees, it’ll be for me.” He pulled away from me, releasing my hand. His gaze hardened, his eyes sweeping over my trembling body. Something flashed in the blue depths, but it was so fast I wasn’t even sure if I saw it. “You owe me, Rosalie. I’ll be back to collect.”

He didn’t wait for my answer. He turned and walked away, leaving me shaking against my locker, wondering what the hell had just happened.