IMADE AND JAMAL

Imade.

Anger is an understatement to describe exactly how I feel right now. I wasn't angry at Jamal or at that stupid wench that kissed him, I was angry at myself.

I was angry at myself for being a fool, I was angry at myself for being easy, for being trusting and for waiting for a man like an idiot and depriving myself of the love that I rightfully deserved. Honestly, I wouldn't blame Jamal completely because at the end of the day, it was my decision and my choice and I chose to wait for him and like a fool, I got dropped in the worst way possible.

"Hey, are you okay?" A familiar voice asks and I look up to see Joseph looking back at me with a concerned expression.

"Uh... Yeah, sure. I'm fine. Do you need something?" I ask.

"You don't look fine though. Your eyes are a little swollen and reddish and your face looks slightly swollen as well. Did something happen?" He persists.

"It's nothing too serious Joseph, just another bad day." I reply him tiredly, hoping he'd realise that I wasn't in the mood to talk.

"Does it have anything to do with what I told you earlier? And please don't lie to me cause it was after I told you that you suddenly left and now since you got back, you've been in a sour mood. Should I have kept my mouth shut? I'm guessing I should have but believe me I honestly had no bad intentions and I'm sorry if it caused you any trouble." He blurts nonstop and I mentally rolled my eyes at how talkative he was being.

"I should actually be thanking you for telling me. It was exactly what I needed to wake up from a long dream." I reply him and I meant every word I said. If it wasn't for him, I would have continued fooling myself and hiding behind the false hope that Jamal probably had amnesia and that one day he'd eventually remember me. What a joke! I mentally scoff at my foolishness.

"Well then, I guess I'm not to blame. If you need anything, anything at all, you can always call on me. I'll be happy to help you." He says assuringly and I offer him the most genuine smile my face and my mood could muster.

"Thanks a lot Joseph." I say to him and watched him walk away before placing my head on my table.

A sudden knock on my table jolted me out of my sulking time and when my head looks up, my eyes meet with Temilade's unfriendly pair.

"How may I help you Temi?" I ask and she scowls.

"Are you supposed to sleep at work?" She retorted and I sigh in frustration, wondering why in the world she was so hell bent on making my life a living hell.

"I wasn't sleeping, I was thinking and besides, we only have fifteen minutes left before work period ends and as you can see, I'm less busy which means I have the right to take a breather and think. So if you have nothing important to say, please walk away." I hiss back at her in frustration and stares back at me with a scornful look on her face.

"Well, I can't say I really blame you anyways. I blame the corrupt nature of this country that allows good for nothings like you to get undeserved opportunities. I'm pretty sure you're one hundred percent certain about getting hired and that is why you're not even afraid to sleep at work when you only started to work here yesterday." She snaps with so much bitterness and I'm beyond amazed at how much venom was dripping down her voice.

"What do you have against me? What did I ever do to offend you? I barely know you and you already painted the worst picture of me in your head. What exactly is your problem?" I asked her, honestly wishing she'd give me an actual response that would explain the real reason for her actions.

"Well, you could say I hate people who believe sleeping around will help them achieve success. I hate cheap women like you who would desperately lay with any man just to climb up the success ladder. That is the exact problem I have with you cause you're one of those women and mere seeing you, makes my blood boil with pure disgust!" She spat at me and my jaw drops.

I have never felt so much hatred coming from one person in my entire life. She has only known me for two days and look how badly she already hated me.

"Listen Temilade, I honestly don't know what your problem is and I won't say I care but if you want to hate on someone, don't hate on me. If you want to vent at someone, don't vent at me. If you want to shove your bitterness down someone else's throat, don't try to shove it down mine cause I won't swallow it. Your perception about me is solely your business and I don't care about what you think but I'd prefer those thoughts remain in your head and they should stay buried in there."

"I won't allow a stranger like you to defame my character without reason and let me warn you clearly, if you spout any of this nonsense out to anyone else and spread any false rumors about me, I will not hesitate to report you. Be warned and if you'll excuse me now, the time is 6pm which means my work here is done." I snap back at her strictly, packing up my bags and getting ready to leave.

"I don't have to spread anything cause everyone already knows how you got in anyway." She replies confidently and I smirk.

"Unfortunately, I can't be bothered by mere office gossip when I have better things to do with my time. It's too bad those of you gossiping have nothing better to do with your time. I guess bad mouthing people makes you feel superior and better about yourselves, too bad. How very disappointing!" I reply her sarcastically and she hisses angrily before walking away, fuming.

I sigh in relief immediately she was out of sight and I thanked God for giving me the patience to swallow her insults without reacting immediately. I'd be honest, her words really cut deep but after everything unfortunate that has happened to me as of late, her words were nothing but another situation I can always overlook.

***

7:30pm At a bar...

"I'm a fool Angy. I'm a very very verrryyy big fool. I am foooolll!" I drawled childishly before breaking into guffaws.

"Imade, I think you've had enough to drink. You're already going past your limit." Angela warns but I ignore her and take another gulp out of my fifth bottle of beer.

"You're never irrational Imy and I don't think this bastard you're clamouring over is worth your tears and your sadness. You said it yourself that he's with another woman now and he told you to your face that he wanted nothing to do with you, so why are you still wailing over such a useless being? You should even be happy that now you can finally live your life to the fullest without feeling obligated or bound to anyone." She says as an attempt to get me to stop drinking and I laugh out loudly, taking another swig of my very cold beer.

"Angy, you have no idea how it feels." I say to her and immediately burst into uncontrollable tears.

"I s..spent ten good years of my life praying for Jamal's safety. I lived ten years of my life worrying about him and missing everything about him. Do you want to know how I consoled myself every time I felt lonely?"

"I would stare at an old picture I had with him and assure myself that he was going to come back and that I'd finally get the chance to do everything I've refrained myself from doing with him. I sometimes cried myself to sleep, dreaming, hoping and praying that he'd come back safely and in one piece and Gela, what did I get in return?" I asked rhetorically, wiping my flowing tears with the back of my hand.

"Angela, I am broken. I feel lost, destroyed, alone and tired. On one hand, it's my mother, on the other, it's my little sister and now I have to deal with this wretched feeling of despair that's clouding my soul and honestly, it hurts Angy, it hurts like hell and I don't know how to let it go." I hit my chest repeatedly, letting out the tears I have being suppressing for the last decade.

"My heart hurts seeing you like this Imade, this isn't you. This person is not worth all this pain you're going through my friend. Snap out of it please." She pleads with me calmly and I could tell from the way she spoke that she was trying really hard not to cry as well.

"I can't help it Angela. Everywhere I look I see that skinny bitch kissing him and it makes me boil with rage and disappointed. And at the same time, it makes me feel so inferior and insignificant compared to her. She looked so elegant and so gorgeous and I just stood in front of her looking like a peasant. I can't help how I feel right now Angela and I really wish it would just stop!" I raise my voice slightly, taking multiple gulps from my drink before pausing to cough out a little and catch my breathe.

"You're not inferior Imade and that is something I can assure you of. For now, let's get you home so you can get some rest." She tells me and gently pulls away the bottle from my tight grasp.

I resist a little but soon after, a sudden feeling of tiredness overwhelmed me and my head started to spin, my legs felt rather weak and wobbly and I started to feel dizzy and nauseous. My legs were about to lose it's balance but Angela was quick to hold me back up although being the shorty that she was, she found it quite difficult to hold on to me and I could barely walk or even see anything around me.

"Let me help you." A strangely familiar male voice offers to help and when I look up to try to see who it was, all I could see were his blurry features that looked awfully familiar.

"No, thanks." Angela refuses but the familiar stranger persists and their back and forth banter continuously made my head spin and the last words I heard before I passed out were. "She's a colleague from work."☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐☐