If You Want Me (The Toronto Terror Series)

Two days before the gala, my younger sister, brother-in-law, and niece stop in for a surprise visit. Mike is a professor and sometimes guest lectures at the local university. Occasionally when he has a trip, he’ll bring Micha and my nearly three-year-old niece, Elsa, along. They live a couple of hours away in Niagara.

“Unca Haw-lis, look at my fissy! And my turble!” Elsa holds up a stuffed rainbow fish and a stuffed green turtle.

“They are amazing! Did you have the best time at the aquarium today?” I pick her up and raspberry her cheek.

“Ah! Unca Haw-lis!” She pushes on my chest and giggles. “Do again! Do again!”

I give her another raspberry, and she bursts into a fit of giggles.

There’s a knock on my door. I glance at the clock, realizing it’s probably Aurora. Roman has taken on training with the backup goalie a couple of times a week, so he’s out for a few hours some afternoons. Yesterday, Aurora told me she’d tried to feel Roman out, and it did not go well. She explained what happened through panicked tears. I can’t decide if his reaction had more to do with what we know about Tristan’s proclivities, or him actually dating Rix. Regardless, telling Roman before the gala is off the table now. I offered, again, to pull out of the auction, but Aurora is afraid he’ll connect the dots and I’ll be minus a few teeth, or my head.

“Just let me get the door, and then I’ll hook you up with something to drink. Can you stay the night, or do you have to head back?” I put Elsa down and cross the room.

“Mike is teaching a seminar back home tomorrow morning. I figured we could visit the aquarium, and then you, before we drive home.” Micha thumbs over her shoulder at Elsa, who’s rushed over to the wall of windows overlooking the city, pretending to make her fish and turtle swim in the reflection. “And if timed correctly, this one will pass out on the ride.”

I open the door and find Aurora holding this week’s prepared meals from Rix. She looks tired and anxious. “I brought your dinners for the week and—” Her eyes flare. “Oh! You have company. I’m so sorry.”

“Oh my gosh, Peggy?” Micha practically shoves me out of the way and pulls her into a hug.

Aurora mouths sorry and gives me her oh-shit face while she pats my sister on the back. “Hey! Hi, Micha. It’s so nice to see you.”

“Good Lord.” Micha’s eyes widen as she steps back. “Wow! You are…not a teenager anymore!”

Aurora smiles, cheeks turning pink. “Uh, no. Full-fledged adult now.”

Micha takes the bags from her. “Well, come on in. Hollis was about to pour me a glass of wine. You’re old enough to drink now, right? By a few years?”

“Uh, yeah, I’m legal to drink in the States now, but I don’t want to interrupt family time.”

“Nonsense. Mike and Hollis will talk hockey, and I’ll nod and smile because I still don’t really understand the rules. I think Hollis mentioned you’re almost done with university. Is that right?”

“Yeah, just final exams left and I’ll be finished with my undergrad.”

“That’s so exciting. What I wouldn’t give to go back and relive my university days. I had a lot of fun during my undergrad.”

“And then you met me and traded house parties with cheap beer for fine dining and nice wine.” My brother-in-law smiles fondly as he takes a sip of his beer.

“I regret neither,” Micha replies.

“Hi! My name is Elsa, and this is my fissy and my turble!” My niece holds up her stuffed toys for Aurora to see.

Aurora crouches, so they’re at the same level. “Hi, Elsa. You probably don’t remember me, because I haven’t seen you in a long time. My name is Aurora.”

Elsa’s eyes go wide. “I love Princess Aurora!”

“And I love Queen Elsa. Frozen is one of my favorite movies ever!”

“Mine too!” Elsa smiles up at me. “Unca Haw-lis, I really like your friend Aurora.”

Micha gives Aurora an apologetic smile. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I thought your name was Peggy.”

“Technically it is, but she prefers to go by her middle name,” I explain.

“Oh, okay.”

“I answer to both, though. And the team calls me Hammer, since it’s a last-name world for those boys,” Aurora explains.

“But you prefer Aurora?” Micha asks.

“I do.”

“Daddy, I have to pee!” Elsa announces.

“I can take her,” Micha offers.

“I got it.” Mike kisses Micha on the cheek and takes Elsa’s hand, leading her down the hall.

I hand Aurora a glass of white.

She takes a small sip and smiles. “It’s my favorite. Thank you.”

Micha gives me a look. I busy myself with opening a beer.

“If I remember correctly, you’re working on a degree in public relations, right? What’s your plan when you graduate?” Micha asks.

“There’s an assistant posting to work with the Terror’s public relations liaison that I’d like to apply for.”

Micha nods. “Oh wow, you don’t see enough of these guys as it is? You want to work with them, too?”

Aurora shrugs and blushes, eyes sliding my way for a moment. “I completed my internship with the head of team PR last semester, and it was a great fit.”

“That’s right. Hollis mentioned that in the fall. Did you travel with the team?”

“Some of the time, yes.”

Micha’s eyes light up. “That must have been fun. Private jets and famous hockey players. How’s Roman feel about that?”

“He loved it. The team’s like a big, extended family, for the most part.” Aurora sips her wine to hide her nervous swallow.

Micha hmms. “Wasn’t there some drama earlier in the season with one of the players’ family members dating another player? Tristan Stiles? That wasn’t you, was it?”

“Uh, no. That’s my roommate, Rix. Her brother is Flip Madden,” Aurora explains, shifting uncomfortably.

“Right! Yes! That must have been scandalous.”

“It’s all smoothed over now,” I interject. Micha has no idea that she’s poking at raw wounds. “I’ll put this stuff away and we can go hang out in the living room,” I suggest. “I should have some coloring stuff for Elsa in the spare room.”

“I think it’s in the closet. Want me to check?” Aurora offers, probably happy to escape this conversation.

“That’d be great. Thanks, Princess.”

Micha waits until she disappears down the hall. “What the hell is going on?”

“What are you talking about?” Fuck, fuck, fuck.

She motions toward the hall. “There’s a vibe between you two.”

I look at her like she has two heads, but my stomach knots. I can’t afford to have Micha digging now. Not when Aurora is already on edge.

Micha crosses her arms. “Why does she know you have coloring stuff for Elsa in the closet in the spare bedroom?”

“Because she watches Postie and Malone while I’m away, and sometimes she runs the towels and cat blankets through the wash for me, which go in the spare bedroom closet.” I glance toward the hall, needing Micha to drop it.

“You called her Princess,” she says pointedly.

“I’ve always called her Princess, because she’s the team princess.” I don’t realize I’m doing it in front of other people, though, and that’s a problem.

“Why do you have her favorite wine in your fridge?” my sister presses.

“Because in addition to feeding my cats, she sometimes watches the game with them while I’m away.” Footsteps come from down the hall. “I need you to drop it. And don’t grill Aurora. She’s got a lot going on.”

“Dropping it.” She raises both her hands. “For now.”

I make a big deal about Elsa peeing in the potty when she comes bumbling back into the living room with Mike in tow. Aurora returns with an entire bin of coloring books, crafts, and stickers. Elsa entices her into coloring with her. She takes a seat on the floor with my niece and keeps her occupied for a good half hour.

I try my best not to watch them. But every once in a while, she glances up at me, and all I want to do is wrap my arms around her and tell her everything will be okay. Hiding my feelings is becoming impossible. I just need her to believe we can do this.