I Am Jessamine

The side of the suite Jess was in appeared to be the bedroom and there was a low fire in the hearth. Jess had to wait a while before her eyes adjusted. Finally, she could see bits and pieces and she finally made out a door on the wall to her left and she carefully made her way over steering clear of a low table and pillows on the floor. The door was unlocked and when Jess entered very quietly she looked around. It appeared to be a very large bathing area and obviously, the cupboards were the dry cupboards. Jess moved back into the room that was bigger than some houses she had seen in her time.

A movement near the bed caught her eye and she stood very still and looked carefully. There was no growling, so it wasn’t a dog. No hissing, so a cat was out. Jess took a step forward and as she did whatever it was jumped up and with a shriek like a banshee came at her with god knows what in its hands. Jess didn’t hesitate a second and ran forward at a speed putting her head down Then it suddenly struck her that it was a small built naked man. Not waiting another moment Jessie kicked him in his crotch and he went down in a dead faint.

Stepping back over the prone figure Jess went and stoked the fire and threw a few more logs on it and then made sure her bandanna was up and over her mouth and nose. A bit more light flooded the room and Jess returned to the now semi-conscious person on the floor. His face was made up like a woman and his hair had pins and wooden curlers and strange strips of material and all of it made him remind Jess of a barbie doll she had once, as a child, and given a mohawk haircut at one time or another.

Lifting him by the shoulders and putting her arms beneath his pits she dragged him to the nearest chair and propped him up. He looked up at her with big brown watery eyes and sniffled and his hands held onto his injured bits.

Whispering Jess asked him, “How old are you and who are you?”

With tears now running down his rouged cheeks, he whispered back, “My name is Thomas and I think I am fifteen or sixteen years old. I am not sure.” Jess noticed he spoke rather well and appeared educated.

“What are you doing here Thomas?” Jess put her foot up on a stool and leaned her arms on her thigh.

“I have to stay here. My Master makes me sing and play music.” He whispered.

“Tell me your story, but make it quick,” Jess said staring at him.

“I was brought here to be a plaything. That is what they call me. I have to stay in my Master’s bedroom until he comes back. I am not allowed to leave and he has the keys.” He held up his hand to his mouth and gasped, “How did you get in?” Thomas sniffed and looked fairly pathetic, but was curious enough to ask questions.

“Wanna get out of this place Thomas and find a better life for yourself?” Jessie asked and raised her eyebrow and he never spoke but nodded so hard his lips flapped.

“Good. I need to find where your Master keeps his private papers. You help me, I will help you.” And she put out her hand and Thomas took it without hesitation and Jess noticed his hands were tiny and soft. Poor kid, she thought.

“Get dressed. Have you got clothes for a lad?” Jess asked trying to be sensitive to his gender.

Thomas nodded and pulled clothes off a chair beside the bed and hurriedly dressed and she noticed a thin strip of cloth around his waist and then down between his buttocks almost like a twenty-first-century thong, but strangely there was a wad of cloth and it looked like a sanitary pad. Jess was incredibly confused and had to ask him.

“Are you a male or female then Thomas?” she asked softly but kindly.

“I am a boy. I have always been a boy, but I didn’t develop like other boys, so people thought there was something wrong with me and I got made fun of and treated poorly. My mam taught me to read and write and play music and sing, but then she died. My father sold me to a man who made me do things that I didn’t like with other men and women and they would give him the money, but it kept me warm and food in my stomach. Then this Master came along and was with me for one night and then took me from my bed and brought me here.” He was now dressed and Jess could see how he could look feminine. She helped him take the odds and ends out of his hair as she asked, “Then why the wad of cloth between your legs?” The boy closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The poor child is embarrassed, thought Jess. Her heart ached for the boy.

“I think I am almost used up. It doesn’t close too well down there and if I mess my Master beats me.” The poor boy looked so ashamed Jess fumed at how pathetically sad his situation was. She desperately wanted to make things right for him, but they had no time to talk anymore. They had to step it up a notch.

Thomas went to a writing bureau that was locked and Jess took her dagger and jimmied it open. Opening cubbies and drawers Jess finally found a thick folder with a red ribbon tied around it and she quickly had a look, saw that it was what she was looking for, and tucked it into her vest.

Grabbing Thomas by the hand she pulled him slowly behind her and they slowly crept from the room just as she saw someone dressed in trousers and a white shirt enter the room Nick was in. Jessie’s breath caught in her throat as she rushed quietly, Thomas in tow, to the door and she recognized the voice. “I would recognize that backside anywhere, ma Cherie.”

“Shit! Valeria, you scared the hell out of me!” and together they said, “What are you doing here?” and Nick said, “Ladies first.”

“Oh Nicholas, forever the joker. You know I work for the Brigadier General.” She purred in her thick French accent which irritated Jess something silly.

She felt Thomas tugging on her sleeve and she tried to push him away, but the little shit wouldn’t stop so Jess turned on him in a fury and the poor kid nearly fainted again, but he managed to mouth a very shaky, “She’s a killer!”

Alarmed and concerned for her brother, Jess drew closer to the open door because she had allotted only a certain amount of time for them to search and plunder. They had to go and go quickly. Willy was probably on his way down and as she thought that she saw Willy peek around the corner near the staircase and he lifted a hand in question. Jess showed him two fingers, then one finger she showed a female and rolled her eyes, and then she showed Nick’s name and Willy started moving slowly down the hall. Jess showed another finger and Willy stopped and his eyes widened. Jess moved slightly and pointed to Thomas and Willy dropped his chin on his chest and shook his head. She also saw him mouth the word, ‘fuck’. She would explain later.

“Nicky, Nicky, Nicky why do you put me in this predicament? You know where my allegiance lies, so what now?” she purred and Jess could just imagine Nick scrabbling for words. He already admitted that he had fallen in love with the bitch. Ugh! I hope he sees her for what she really is, Jess thought angrily.

“Come with me, Val. You know Rancliff is a nutcase and he will never be able to turn Ireland into his Kingdom. Where is he anyway?” Nick asked innocently.

“Oh my dear boy, he is off looking for you because we heard you and your family were going to do bad things to his reputation, oui? Like, interfere with his trades around the Atlantic.” The woman had not moved because Jess did not note her voice coming from further or a different side.

“Oh, for shit sakes Valeria, you can call it what it really is. His trade in human flesh. Besides, I have no idea where you heard such nonsense. Not me, I can tell you.” Nick started sounding nervous and Jess stepped beside the door and quickly looked around the door frame. What she saw scared the hell out of her so she pulled her dagger out of its sheath and took it by its point and held it loosely between her forefinger and thumb.

“No, really now, Valeria. What are you going to do? Poke me to death with that ridiculous dagger?” Nick sounded even more nervous and Jess stepped into the doorway and Nicks’ eye flickered and the woman, being the experienced killer that Thomas reported she was, must have noticed and she spun around, and before Jess knew what had happened the woman’s dagger was loosed and young Thomas pushed Jess out of the way. The weapon whistled through the air and Jess heard it hit flesh and Thomas went down with the dagger up to its hilt in his chest. It all happened so fast and Jessie’s reaction was even faster. Without even thinking about it Jess flicked her dagger from waist height, left arm up and following through by stepping out with her right leg, but it also had passion as well as the power behind it, for Nicks’ life, and it glittered as it flew whistling its death song through the air. Valeria had tried to move, but not fast enough and Jessie’s newly sharpened dagger sliced through her muscle and into internal organs in her belly. She looked down at the dagger and tried to remove it, but it got sucked in by her flesh and caused excruciating pain and she sat heavily on the floor. All the while the sharp edges of the dagger sliced her insides.

Jess dragged Thomas into the room quickly and left the dagger in his chest. Nick kneeled down beside Valeria and he had tears in his eyes, “I loved you. I would have given you anything. Everything. Why? Why couldn’t you just love me back?” He sounded pathetically sad and Jess felt incredible pain for him.

“I am not a good person, ma Cherie. I like the smell of death and I like to hurt people. This is how I have always wanted to die. Feeling the pain I inflicted on others inflicted upon me now.” She gasped and Jess looked over at her in time to see her shake a small sharp dagger from her sleeve.

Oh my god, the sneaky bitch, she is still trying to kill Nick! She won’t bloody give up, thought Jess as her body reacted and she took three long strides over to her. As the French bitch brought the little blade up Jessie swung back and went for the gold and kicked the knife out of Valeria’s hand, shattering her wrist at the same time. They heard the bones crack and break and in one swift movement Jess went down, grabbed the handle of her dagger, and as she rose almost in a pirouette, she dragged the blade out of Valeria’s belly.

Valeria stared up at Jess and her mouth gaped open and she panted, “You are the lover of that stuck-up, black-haired brother of that little riche salope Daniels and I had fun torturing and killing for Rancliff.” And she grinned and coughed. Blood splattered the front of her shirt and Jessie went black. Nick pulled back and stared at her. He knew the vile story of Thaliana and he was very obviously shocked.

Pushing Nick aside Jessie took her dagger and held it under Valeria’s chin against her throat with her right hand and with her left she grabbed a handful of hair and pulled her head back. In one swift motion Jess sliced the blade across her throat and leaning down into Valeria’s face she pulled her bandanna down and said, “That was for my younger brother and the love of his life! Now die, salope.” Jess stood up and looked at Nick. He nodded sadly as they made to exit the room and quietly closed the door as Nick stuffed the files and papers he had found into his vest. Jess would deal with the aftermath of this lot later, she thought with a tightening of her jaw.

Willy had been keeping cavy, but had heard everything and he looked worriedly at Jessie. She only shook her head as she wiped her blade on the table cloth covering a table in the hall. Keeping it in her hand she crouched down, as did Willy and Nick, and they headed back toward the stairs.

Halfway down they heard the shouts from the upstairs room because obviously the orgy had ended and the participants could not get out of the room. Looking at the balustrade Jess decided to take the chance and she sat on it and started sliding down. Nick and Willy watched her and then followed quickly. Reaching the bottom the noise from above was getting louder and already voices were coming down the passage from the kitchen area. Pointing to the large tapestries hanging on the wall Jess, Willy, and Nick all clambered behind the biggest one that was hanging behind a rather large chest with only god knew what in it.

Men went running past and headed up the stairs and the trio peeked out and hurriedly moved from their hiding place and turned down the passage. They needed to get going before the bodies were discovered. Total lockdown and all hell would break loose. Running quickly and just managing to get around the next bend past the kitchens before another group of men ran out and up towards the shouts, chaos, and mayhem, they moved swiftly, but quietly and headed down to their exit door.

Unfortunately, three men decided it was then that they would leave where they had been to see what the commotion was all about and they clashed in the semi-dark passage.

The three thieves drew their swords and didn’t wait. Jess, Willy, and Nick flew into the soldiers at a rate of knots. Surprise was their best advantage. Their swords clashed, but only briefly before they managed to subdue the soldiers. Willy killed the one soldier outright by running him through before he could even draw his sword and Nick’s adversary would most certainly die with the stab wound to his abdomen and Jessie had silenced her soldier with an upward thrust beneath his chin and her sharp little sword had sliced cleanly through muscle, cartilage, and fine bone into his skull. With a bit of roughness and strength, she managed to get her sword loose.

Kicking the dying soldier in the head to quieten his moaning, Nick ran down the passage first with Jess in the middle and then Willy at the rear. As they ran past the cell, where they had tossed the other two soldiers, they could hear their efforts of getting themselves loose and to try and attract attention by making a noise, but it would be a while before they were found, if ever. It was then that they heard the shouts loud and clear. There was a fire in the attic area. Jessie turned and winked at Willy and he grinned. The man was a secret arsonist. He seemed to know exactly where to start a fire and let it smolder until it blew into a raging inferno just at the right time. They heard the shouts and screams about there being arsonists on the property. Soldiers had to help put the fire out and others had to find the arsonists. Now was the crunch time and Jess prayed Gems’ lessons and teachings paid off.

They got to the door and opened it quietly and the stench was even worse for some reason. They had to put their gag reflexes away and just run. Pull out all the stops and haul ass.

Jumping over rotting whatever it was, they ran. Slipping here and there, but finally getting to the shortest end of the bank to get out of the trench. They pulled themselves up and stayed low, but ran as fast as their legs would allow. As they hit the darker area they straightened and Jess put her fingers in her mouth and gave a piercing whistle. It was loud but clear.

“What the fuck, Jessie?” Nick hissed at her. They kept running and then they heard it. Hoofbeats and out in front of them flying out of the tree line came Spark with Autumn and Wanderer on his tail and much to Jessie’s surprise, little Archie was doing some low flying as well. Jessie smiled and held her arms open and Spark came towards her and slowed down, but did not stop. As he ran close by Jess ran beside him and reached up and grabbed onto the pommel and with the momentum swung her foot into the stirrup and then the other leg over the saddle. She grabbed the reins and lay low on Sparks’ neck. Looking behind her she saw that Nick and Willy had done the same thing and were settling themselves into their saddles and little Archie was keeping up. Keeping to the darkness of the tree line they shot up the incline towards the road they knew was there, but not many others did. It was an old travel road that had got washed away years before that her grandfather had pointed out to her and then explained how it was way below the new road and there was a ledge type of outcropping above it for many miles. Jess found it and told Spark to do his best safely. Both Willy and Nick were behind her and little Archie was scrabbling to keep his footing, but he stayed with them.

Looking back over her shoulder down towards the Dun Laoghaire Estate Jess could see riders heading out onto the road that would lead them to the major roads. They were not out of the woods yet by no means, but they had a head start and Jess had memorized the terrain. The fire was growing in intensity and the sky was aglow. Jess wondered how many villagers or tenants would go and lend a hand to save the place. She didn’t really care. She wanted Rancliff to think everything had perished in the fire. She wanted Valeria to perish in the flames and turn to ash for all the pain she had caused. She sent up a prayer for young, brave Thomas who had not had much of a life but was now far from all the suffering and pain that was inflicted upon him.

They rode hard for about an hour when Jess finally started to slow Spark because there was a cave nearby that her grandfather had mentioned. He had told her what markers to look out for and she had already seen one, which was a rock in the shape of a basket. It was actually a massive boulder and it was sticking out precariously. According to him, the cave was about two to three miles beyond that a little up from the old road. Rather well camouflaged, he had said. So Jess kept her eyes open, but the mist did not make it easy. Instead of doing what the soldiers would think them to do, which would be to continue riding away, although they knew not where so they would thin out their men and try to cover all major roads. They chose to stop and rest their horses after the crazy adrenalin-pumping sprint.

She finally found the cave and they managed to get the horses in there as well, just as her grandfather said she would. The horses were foaming and in desperate need of rest so Jess was relieved they could all be together in the cave and most alarmingly little Archie found them all ten minutes later.

Jessie petted him and told him what an amazingly brave boy he was. She fed the horses and waited for a while before giving them a drink from the leather bucket Willy had folded under his bed roll. They had to travel light now and move as quietly, but as quickly as they could. Their lives and the lives of their loved ones and the rest of the people in the land they all loved were all at stake right now.

“We have to take shifts and get some sleep for a couple of hours. It must be nigh on midnight, so we will leave again in about four hours then. Early to rise again tomorrow so we can get to Dublin by tomorrow afternoon, that’s only without any interruptions. Mr. Tora will be waiting for us behind Grays’ trade warehouse where he will take and secure the horses and have all the boarding papers we will need.” Willie said as he threw Autumn’s blanket over her back and began checking her hooves.

Jessie took one of her own blankets and threw it over little Archie’s back after she had sorted and checked Spark and then she did a quick inspection of the brave little horse with the heart of a warrior. Patting the little guy she whispered in his ear, “You are the bravest boy I have ever met and your heart is bigger than any I have known. You make me proud, Archibald.” And she scratched between his ears as he nodded his head and Jess laughed softly at him.

Turning around to her brother she knew she had to say something, but she didn’t know what to say, there were no words for her to express herself accurately and it made her angry. Jessie could see his heart was broken and there was nothing she could do to fix it. She had to bear the responsibility of ending the life of the woman he had loved with all his heart. Yes, Valeria had not reciprocated that love, but that didn’t make his pain any less. So, instead, she took first watch and sat outside wrapped in her fur blanket and looked out over the misty blackness.

Sitting quietly Jess was overcome with how deafening the silence could be and how a warm body lying beside her breathing made so much difference. She began to think of her times spent with Gray and her heart squeezed tight and her chest constricted. Jess felt the warm tears flowing down her cheeks. Will I ever get over you, Grayson? Jess thought sadly and wiped her tears and nose. Remember me with love, Gray, she begged silently. Remember me smiling and laughing. Remember me dancing and laughing. Remember me in your arms and loving every inch of you. Remember me, I beg you, and how much I love you, but most of all remember how much I want you to live. Jess sat silently shedding her tears while her soul shook to its very foundations.

A while later Jessie felt, rather than heard, soldiers walking their horses on the road above a little distance away. As they moved closer she began to hear their indistinct talk among each other. She strained her ears and caught only pieces of the quiet conversation, ‘Can’t see bugger all in this bloody mist.’ And then ‘… a roadblock a few miles ahead.’ As they were directly above Jess heard one say, ‘He is going to be as mad as a badger in a trap when he sees the damage the fire made. Whoever did it will be far gone by now, but I would prefer to be out here than there, to be sure!’ Another voice responded, ‘Aye, I agree, but how do we know who to stop? What do we look for?’ and the first voice replied, ‘We stop everyone and ask where they are going and why. If we want we may even check their bags. We are here on the Kings business anyway, to keep these savages and pagans in check.’ Jessie bristled at this then heard a new voice, ‘Right then, so what do we check for in their bags?’ and clearly it was the leader who replied again, ‘Oh for god’s sake, I don’t know. Just make sure they have no weapons, I suppose.’ And then they quietly continued arguing among themselves.

Jess took a deep breath and allowed that information to stew. Going through a roadblock would not be a problem. They would stick to their story and they did not look like thieves or brigands. All they had to do was roll their swords into their bedrolls behind their saddles, drop their daggers into their boots and there would be no evidence of weapons on them. It would be to their advantage to go through the roadblock as once they were through and out of sight they could then pick up the pace without concern and get to Dublin.

Nick moved out of the little cave and sat beside Jess and whispered, “You getting some sleep tonight?” and she shook her head no. “Nicky, I am so sorry about Valeria.” And he nudged her with his shoulder, “Stop that Jessie. You did what you had to do and if you didn’t, I would be dead. She did not hesitate to try and kill me, so I guess she did not feel for me what I felt for her.” He sounded so sad Jessie scooted closer and pulled her fur blanket around his shoulders and lay her head on his shoulder.

“I am sorry, too, Jess. I am sorry I was such a pathetic idiot and caused so much pain, shame, and drama. No, wait, Jessie, I have to say this for me.” He said when she tried to interrupt. “You have done all you can to try and undo what has been done wrong and you committed yourself to find me and helping me out of this mess. We will always have our childhood Jess, but please remember how much I appreciate you. You have made me see what honor and loyalty truly are and for that I am grateful. You didn’t just save my life once, you have been doing it all our lives and now it is my turn. Somehow, some way I will find a way for you to see what I can accomplish and how a dickhead like me can do good.” He pulled her closer and held her a little tighter. “I am going to miss you, little sister. But I do have one important question, though. Do you remember how to set those things that are buried in the barn?”

Jessie laughed quietly, “Yeah, dickhead, I remember and I also remember how to reconnect the timers, so all good.” And she hugged him back knowing she can go back home to finish what they had started, with a broken heart, bruised soul, and tears for eternity, but her brother was healed, and she got to know real love and how it felt to be a mother and she was grateful. Jess would carry them all in her heart forever.

A little later they sorted the horses, rolled up their swords, and hid their daggers in their boots. Jessie had told them of the conversation she had heard earlier and they all agreed, that they will stick to their original plan and story. They would only deviate if necessary, but their rule applied right now is to stick to their truth as much as humanly possible.

Jessie took hold of Archie’s reins as she got onto Spark and looked down at the little guy, “You have come this far, laddie, you may as well come to the rest of the way.” And they all laughed when the little horse nodded his head. Willy rode beside Jess and they chatted for a short while before he said, “I am happy for you and Nick that you have sorted your differences. It’s all thanks to you, you know Jessie?” Jess shook her head, “People give me too much credit. You would faint if you knew half the shit that went on inside this head of mine!” she tapped her temple and they laughed.

“What’s our story with this little chap?” asked Willy referring to Archie.

“He is a gift for my godson,” Jess said simply, shrugging her shoulders, and Nick and Willy nodded.

Just before noon they crested a hill and looked down and laying in front of them was the long and winding road to Dublin. They could see the town in the distance and the blue ocean beyond that. Willy nodded and smiled, “We will be in Dublin town in about three hours.” And they moved on and as they reached a bend that was about halfway four redcoats were lolling about the side of the road looking very bored. When they saw the trio with the little horse they all jumped up and stood across the road, muskets in hand, waiting.

Reaching them one of the soldiers stepped forward and said loudly, “What are your names, where do you come from and what is your business for being on the road?” Willy, Nick, and Jess looked at one another just as the other soldiers all looked at each other.

Nick was the first to respond, “My name is Nicholas de Clisson Kellie and I am from Broch de Clisson and I am on my way to Dublin to attend to business matters.”

Willy followed suit, “My name is William James Marshall MacLeod and I am from the Dranmore Estate on my way to Dublin to buy spices, rices and everything nices.” There was a smattering of snickers at this comment.

Then Jess added her information, “My name is Deaglan Rourke O’Cleirigh and I am the son of the Earl of Dranmore on my way to Dublin to arrange travel arrangements for my betrothed.”

The trio sat facing the soldiers and waited while the soldier who asked the questions absorbed all of this information. “What is the little horse for then?”

Looking over at Archie she said, “This is Archibald and he is a gift for my godson.”

The soldier turned to the others behind him and a whispered conversation went on for a few seconds before he turned around again and asked, “Do you have any weapons?”

In a single voice, they all three stated that they did not and the soldier then stepped forward and said, “May we search your bags then?”

“For what, exactly? Weapons?” asked Nick with raised eyebrows and an incredulous look on his face.

“Yes, for weapons. Don’t try to be clever now!” These men were spoiling for a fight, but they had no time and had to move on.

Jess responded before Nick could, “Certainly, you may check our bags.” And the soldier called the other men forward and they began scratching in their saddle bags helping themselves to their leftover cheese, bread, and dried fruit. Walking to the side of the road stuffing their mouths with food the soldier who had stopped them indicated with his arm for them to move along.

Seething and feeling her cheeks burn Jessie had to bite down really hard to stop herself from turning around and pulling out her sword and cutting the thieving pigs down. Glancing sideways she could see Nick and Willy had pretty much the same looks on their faces, but they had a mission to accomplish, and starting a slaughter fest with this lot would bring too much attention.

After about a half hour of trotting along the road, Willy turned in his saddle and looked back, but the road had wound about so many times the soldiers were a long time from view and he began to laugh. Nick and Jess looked at each other and then at Willy and he laughed like he was going to die from it. Nick shook his head and frowned not understanding what he was on about and then Jess got it. “What did you do to the loaves of bread you had in your saddle bags, Willy?” Jess asked in between his guffaws.

“There is so much Senna oil over the leftover loaves those bastards will be shitting for weeks!” and he began his raucous laughter and guffaws all over again. Jess and Nick smiled and shook their heads and then joined in the laughter. The tears were running down Willy’s cheeks as he said between gasps, “Their britches are going to have to be thrown away!” Their laughter began all over again and Jess felt happy to be ending their time together in this way.

Dublin town lay before them and Jess knew that within the hour she would have to say goodbye to her godfather and board a ship with her brother. Even though she was laughing with Willy her tears were her heartbreak.