Chapter 12
Asgeir's POV
"For taking your first kiss like that." He said looking at the window.
"What's done is done. There's nothing we can do about that now. We're still going to get married because that's something that's not up to us, what is up to us however is-" I said as I got up and walked to sit next to him.
"How we treat each other after that."
I placed my hand under his chin and turned his head to face me. I widened eyes a bit when I saw his eyes glistening. I placed my hand on the side of his face and wiped away the moisture before it rolled down.
"I really meant it when I said you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. That day that I saw you, I felt as though I had never seen beauty before that day. It's just that, I had never ever wanted something so badly as I want you. I had never felt so many emotions as I feel when I'm with you. I didn't know how to control them, when I saw how all those men look at you when you walk around, how their eyes are filled with lust and desire. It all overtook me all at once that I said all those things that hurt you. I said them because I thought it would take away this feeling that I had for you, and by the time I realized that this feeling was not going to go away, but was only going to get stronger the more I was near you, it was already too late and I had ruined us before we even began." He said looking at me.
He looked at with such a look that even surprised me. He looked so vulnerable and helpless as he sat there and I thought that maybe it wasn't because of all that wine he drank, because he looked like he really meant what he was saying, and I wanted to believe him and give him a chance, not that I had much choice since we were going to get married anyway, but what I did have a choice with however was..
Who I gave my heart to.
And I couldn't exactly be certain that Gregor wouldn't break it. I would rather keep it, than give it someone, only for it to be shattered in an instant. I knew I had to smart about this, and only let go when I was ready, however long it was going to take.
I wiped away the slight trail of tears on his face and leaned in to press my lips against his. I closed my eyes and pressed my face against his. As I kissed him, I could feel that voice at the back of my mind again, warning me against something. Sometimes I just wish it would tell me exactly what was going to happen instead of leaving me with pit in my stomach.
I broke away when I heard someone clearing their throat at my door. I turned my head and saw Arkyn standing at the door with a jug and two goblets in his hand, looking at us with a blank expression.
"It's bad luck to see each other on the eve of your wedding, much more, kissing each other." He said as he walked in and placed the jug and goblet on the table and turned to look at us.
"He's right. I should go." Gregor said as he smiled at me and caressed my face with his thumb before he got up and walked out of my room, not before nodding his head at Arkyn.
After he left, Arkyn walked towards the door and closed it. He walked back to the table and poured the wine into the goblets and handed me one, then walked towards my sofa and sat down. He looked straight at me while he sipped it, almost like he was waiting for me say something.
"I know what you're going to say, so don't." I said and looked into the goblet.
I had never been one to drink. In fact, I had never drunk before in my life, aside from that one time when it was my sixteenth birthday, and Armod and Arvid had substituted my drink of water with one of wine while we had supper. That night the cook had prepared something so spicy, that I grabbed my goblet without looking into it and gulped it down. It was only after I had drunk it all, that I realized I suddenly felt a bit drowsy, and when I saw them laughing at me, I knew they were up to something.
I smiled at the memory and took a sip, wanting to at least get drunk tonight, since it was probably the last night I could do something for me without having to consult my 'husband' about anything and everything.
"And what is it that I'm thinking?" Arkyn raised his eyebrow at me and took a long sip of his wine, still looking at with those hazel eyes of his.
"If I'm not mistaken, it was you that told me not too long ago about that bad feeling you get when you're around him was it not. Imagine my surprise when I walk in here, seeing you locking lips with the supposed man. But you know what surprised me even more?" He asked and leaned forward with a smirk on his face.
"What?" I said and looked back into my goblet, to avoid the look of embarrassment that was most likely evident on my face.
I looked up when I didn't hear him talking and I wish I hadn't because he was not only smirking at me, but he had this devilish grin on his face, and that made me even more redder than I was now if that was even possible, and I was almost certain that whatever he said next would definitely make me wish the ground would just swallow me whole.
He looked at for a few more seconds before he leaned a bit closer and whispered..
"You were the one controlling that kiss."