SWNOVELS HUGE STEPS: Chapter 10
With Abigail still on my mind, I’m feeling a little less worried and a little more thoughtful about things as I take and park my car back over at our place. When I see Jamie’s truck already sitting outside the house, I have to do a double take. Inside, he is on the couch, beer in hand and watching me as I come in the door.
“What are you doing back so late?” he asks, raising a brow in my direction.
I snort. “Me? What? What about you… Why are you home so early? It’s Friday night, isn’t it? Aren’t you usually out you know…doing things on Friday night?” At least that’s how it’s always been, up until recently, but I keep this part to myself.
My brother’s eyes narrow at me. “It’s been a while since I’ve picked up some chick from the bar, Jared. Or haven’t you noticed.”
I figure biting the bullet and getting this over with is probably the best way to handle things with him. “I wanted to talk to you about Abi,” I say, sitting down on the opposite end of the couch, leaning forward.
Jamie sorts, “What’s there to talk about…we fucked up thinking that she wanted anything other than rebound sex.”
I nod. “Yeah. It’s complicated.”
“Complicated? Nah…more like a cluster fuck.”
I roll my eyes because Jamie can’t seem to communicate without f-bombing all over the place. “Yeah, you’re right. It’s definitely a cluster-fuck. Normally I really wouldn’t care but…”
“…but this is Abi,” Jamie says nodding.
“Exactly.” I let my voice trail off, thinking of how Abi acted when I was at her apartment; flustered and cool at the same time, obviously trying to sort out her own feelings.
The other women I’ve shared with my brother have been those usual wild, I-want-to-fuck-you-because-you’re-twin-brothers, kind of girls. But not Abi. She is pretty much the literal translation of girl-next-door material. Wholesome, family oriented. Abi is so much, but it doesn’t make this conversation with my own twin brother any less awkward.
I rub my hand across my brow, trying to work out how to approach what I want to say. “Yeah, yeah. I get it. Before, with the others…we didn’t really have to say anything after, did we? The thing is, it’s different with Abi, and things are blurrier in my mind than I’d like to admit, I guess. You don’t think…I mean we didn’t…”
“I don’t know what you’re about to say, but I swear to God, Jared, if you even mention touching junk, I will come across this couch and punch you square in the goddamn jaw. I swear I will.”
“That wasn’t what I was going to say.”
“Thank fuck for that.” My brother picks up his phone and started replying to a message. He has a stupid smirk on his face. “It was good though, right? Like, really, really good.”
I let out a low whistle. “You are not lying,” I agree. “I mean I have a few moments where it’s a little less detailed, and maybe a little bit hazier than I’d like, but it was really good.”
Jamie quickly nods along in agreement, turning back toward me. “When you’ve wanted something for so long and you finally get it…I mean…damn.” He shakes his head.
“Yeah…when she kissed me first, I didn’t know what to do.”
Jamie snorts. “She only kissed you first because you were closest. She got hotter quicker when she kissed me.”
“Yeah, because you practically pulled her off me…didn’t think you’d be so jealous, man.”
“Jealous? Get outta here,” he laughs. “I thought she was too drunk to know what she was doing. I was trying not to let you damage our sibling relationship.”
I punch Jamie’s leg. “Number one, she was kissing me, not the other way around and number two we are not siblings.”
“You know what I mean, and it sure looked like you were kissing her back.”
“Yeah well, you didn’t exactly push her away when she turned her attentions to you.”
Jamie chuckles lowly. “What do you expect…I’m a man, not a monk.”
“Look, we’re going around in circles here,” I say. It’s weird because we never really get jealous over the other girls we’ve shared.
Jamie seems to understand at the same time that I do, that there’s just no point in any of the arguing. “The point is she had a good time, and that’s what matters,” he says, putting a cap on the obvious dick-measuring.
The fact that Jamie is the one to stop it, though, still kind of stuns me. “Yeah. Yeah, you’re right. That’s all that should matter.”
“But seriously, bro, we didn’t touch junk, did we?”
I give him a hard shove. “Fuck off, Jamie.”
He laughs hard and punches my arm. “Jared, did you just say fuck?”
“It must be catching.” I shrug but smile back at my brother. For all our petty sibling bickering, I love my twin like nothing else.
He hands me a beer and I grab the bottle opener from his other hand and pop it open, taking a swig.
“All right. So we had sex with Abi, and it was really good. The best, but now we achieved the dream, it’s over and done with. Right? She’s made that clear.” It stings little to say it, but I have to know that were both on the same page. Neither one of us should be pursuing her. Especially since it doesn’t seem to be what she wants.
“She’s told us how she feels about what happened and I guess we have to respect that. I don’t like it but what can I do.”
I nod. As much as we would both jump at the opportunity to have more with Abi, it doesn’t look like either of us is going to get another chance.