Honored (Book 2 of the In Search of Honor series)

His words were another wound to add to the many. “Oh,” was all I could get out of my mouth for a moment. Both my father and mother were dead. I didn’t ask how she died because I knew how the Dishonored died. I didn’t need him to tell me it was horrible.

“And my siblings?” I whispered, not sure if I wanted to know what had happened to my half siblings.

“I don’t know what’s happened to Casia. I haven’t seen her in ages, but the others are alive. Duran is looking after the younger ones.” Duran. That was my brother who was turning ten when I left. I was eight when father died, and eighteen when I left. The years didn’t quite add up.

“Was Duran…?” I couldn’t finish the question, as I thought back on how I had treated my half siblings and my family. I was terrible. Horrible for how I had treated them. Even if they all were only my half siblings they were all my family.

“Is Duran your full brother? Is that what you are asking?” Jordan asked, his voice stinging against my realization of my own selfishness.

I nodded, not trusting my voice at the moment.

“Yes. The other four are truly your half siblings. I loved all of you equally though. You all are my children, and I wish that we could have lived as a happy family. I used to dream about it sometimes. Us living the life of even an Undesirable family without the constant threat of the guards hanging over us. I wished we could sit at a table together to eat our pieces of bread.” Tears were streaming down Jordan’s face, and I didn’t know what to do. I had never seen this man as a man who actually cared about any of us.

He threw his arms around me, and I forced myself not to push him away. It seemed I was wrong about so many things from my past. If this man was honest, if he wasn’t a spy, what was I? I was the evil older sibling tearing the only father my siblings knew away from them.

I forced myself to return his embrace, “Jordan, Duran needs his father still. He’s lost his mother and he and the others need you.” I couldn’t remember their names. I couldn’t remember my own siblings’ names, but I could do this much for them. Please stay here. Stay here till the fighting subsides, and then take them into exile with you. Out there is an endless blue sky, and a table where you can share bread with them.” I pulled away from his embrace, and he let me push him away.

“Liv, I want revenge for you mother. I want to kill those bastards.” His voice was hoarse and choked by the tears he was shedding.

“I understand, but I’ll make sure they pay for her death, and you will live on for her.” Saving his life was the least I could do for my siblings. They could all live on in exile.

“Liv, I’m grateful that you would think of saving all of us, but I should go with you. I’ve never done anything for you -”

“No.” I interrupted him. “You will be kept in a safe room for the Undesirables.”

I turned toward Daniel who was patiently waiting at the door. “Daniel, take him to a safe room and have him stay there until the city gates are open. Come back with the castle workers.”

Daniel nodded and opened back up the door.

“But Liv -” Jordan started and stopped as Daniel gripped his shoulder.

“The Exile has spoken,” Daniel said, making sure to put extra emphasis on my new name.

He steered Jordan out as Jordan opened and closed his mouth as if he wanted to say more, but wasn’t sure what to say.

As soon as Jordan and Daniel left the room, I refocused on my task at hand and started drawing out the basement. I would need the drawing to show each person where they were placing their explosives. It was fairly quick to draw it this time since I had just drawn it in the room. Hopefully the drawing was correct and I hadn’t messed up since I was drawing it from old memories.

The door opened up, and cloaked people traipsed in filling the spaces around the edge of the room that were abandoned by the previous group.

I counted their cloaked figures. It looked like 15 people total. Forty six explosives. That meant each person getting three to set up except for one person who would get four.

Should I let them see where all the explosives would go or should I brief each of them separately? They were all putting explosives in, and since each person would be memorizing their position, it shouldn’t make a difference.

“Thank you for volunteering for this. Your task is to bring explosives into the castle, set them, and leave without getting caught.” An easy task.

One person raised their hand, “You say easy, but what’s setting these explosives off?”

“How are we supposed to sneak this stuff into the castle?” Another person asked.

I smiled at them, “Don’t worry about checks to get into the castle. I will be creating a large diversion to distract the castle guards. As for setting them off, these will be explosives made by the Wall with a set timer. All of you will need to set up your explosives in the basement around the same time and get out. When the time finishes ticking down, the basement will explode and take the castle and the monarchy down with it.”

“Sounds straightforward enough, but how do we know that this will bring down the castle,” A male voice asked. It was so weird how they were all hidden in cloaks. They hadn’t been earlier. Had they put on the cloaks while waiting? We didn’t have the explosives ready yet.

The question of how did I know. How to answer that. I didn’t really, but I could parrot things I’d heard before. “Explosives will cause the foundation to crumble, and when that crumbles so does the building.

I saw nods from the people around.

“We are here for this!” One lady exclaimed as another laughed at her outburst.

“Time to watch a King’s home fall,” this was the deep male voice that had questioned me a moment ago.

I saw a figure hug the one with a male voice, “It’s time to show them our soul.” A female voice hissed from beneath the hood.

Their soul. The people’s soul. The city’s soul. I liked it. “Yes, let them see the people of this city’s soul. Let them feel what you’ve suffered. Remember this as you set your bombs. Now, one at a time please come forward and I will show you your bomb positions. Memorize them now. Familiarize yourself with them at your work. Be ready for when the explosives are brought to you.

Slowly they line up. One at a time I showed them their three locations, quizzed them on it, and sent them on their way. I didn’t mark any of them on the floor. I didn’t look at their faces. I trusted only memory for this. On the last person, I showed them one more spot.

“Didn’t the last person have three?” He asked, and I looked up to notice the figure in the cloak seemed similar to the one that had questioned the explosives earlier.

“Yes, most people have three, but I had an odd one I had to give out somehow.” I shrugged. It was the easiest way to get to forty six.

“Oh. I see. Well, here, here, here, and here?” He said while pointing at the locations I had shown him.

“Yup.”

“Got it.” Was his final response before walking out.

I stretched suddenly feeling deeply tired and wishing to be back in my room sleeping.

“Are we finished here?” I asked Daniel.

“Sure. Briefings are done. Now all that’s left is to get supplies from the Wall and then to sit back and watch a city implode.” He was leaning against the door with a smirk on his face.

“It sounds like it will be quite fun.” I walked toward the door he was blocking, and stopped; remembering something, “Oh, and one last thing. Along with being careful to keep your eye on Jordan, please don’t let them talk to anyone outside their respective groups until it’s time. I don’t want word getting out about our plans. Especially watch that older brown haired man who kept asking questions. I really don’t trust him.”

“Understood.” He motioned toward the door. “You coming?”

I thought about waiting with the soldiers. I couldn’t get to know them. I couldn’t stand to know the lives that would be added to my death toll. “Mind if I wait in my room until it’s time to start your entertainment?”

He laughed, “Of course. Where else would you wait? I can’t have you here messing up the normal daily briefings.” He opened the door, grabbed my hand, and led me back through the dark to my prison.