SWNOVELS Here With Me: Chapter 32
Every inch of my body is stiff and achy, but I’d rather that than burning pain. My head hurts like a motherfucker, but from what I’ve randomly heard from the nurse, there hasn’t been any swelling or cause of concern beyond a concussion. The dumbass who hit me managed to whack me just hard enough to knock me out but not keep me down.
When I regained consciousness and realized the barn was on fire, I booked ass to open the horses’ stall doors. The fire started in the loft, which gave me more time to get them loose before it engulfed the entirety of the lower floor. It’s a miracle I was able to get on Donut and escape in one piece. The flames were closing in on us, and he was too spooked to go on his own. He wouldn’t move until I jumped on him. By the time we barreled through the doors, I was suffocating and couldn’t breathe.
Noah squeezes my hand as if she knows I can feel her. Whatever meds they’re pumping through me have been slowly wearing off, and now I’m fighting for the energy to open my eyes.
“Hello?” A faint knock echoes through the room. A voice I’d recognize anywhere.
“Hi,” Noah greets softly. “Who’re you?”
She’s about to meet the man who saved my life and changed it for the better.
“I’m Damien Lancaster. It’s a pleasure to finally meet ya, Miss Hollis.”
“You’re Fisher’s childhood friend.”
“I am.”
“And you know who I am?” Noah asks as if she’s shocked I’d talk about her to a friend. Considering he’s still a detective in the next town over, I’m not surprised he heard about what happened.
“I do.” His voice is closer now, and soon, his palm rests on my arm as if he wants me to know he’s here. “He called and left me a voicemail the day after y’all met and said, ‘Damien, I met her. The woman I’m gonna marry someday.’”
Although I’m not even sure I can talk, I force out the words anyway. “You bastard. Ya weren’t supposed to tell her that.”
“Oh my God! You’re awake?” Noah squeals.
Finally, I manage to lift my eyelids halfway and smile when I see her beautiful face. “Hi, Goldie.”
My throat is raw like I’d swallowed a thousand knives, and my voice is hoarse, but it’s enough for her to hear me.
Noah covers her mouth as tears fall down her cheeks. “Hi.”
“Are the horses okay?” I choke out. My voice is barely audible, but I need to confirm they survived. Once I opened their doors and they ran out, I wasn’t sure where they ended up.
“Yes.” She breaks out into sobs, nodding. “Thanks to you.”
I smile weakly when she buries her head in my chest. Although my limbs feel like concrete, I manage to wrap my arm around her. I’m not wasting this moment with her.
“Hey, man. Glad to see ya alive.” Damien shoots me a knowing grin.
“Yeah, we gotta stop meetin’ like this.”
He barks out a laugh. “Once a decade, you’re right on schedule.”
Between my bull riding incidents that landed me in the hospital, the suicide attempt, and now this, Damien’s seen me at all the lowest points in my life.
“How’s your ankle and ribs?” I ask Noah.
I don’t know how many days I’ve been in here, but by the looks of her disheveled hair and the dark bags under her eyes, she hasn’t left this room.
“The pain ain’t comparable to what it’s been like waitin’ for ya to wake up.”
“Sorry.” I grin, cupping her cheek when she leans in.
“It was worth the wait. I missed you, though. And don’t think we’re skatin’ past the comment Damien made.”
Damien laughs, and I glare at him. He’s been my only family for a long time since I stopped talking to my parents years ago, but we still give each other shit.
“If I’d known that was all it’d take to wake ya up, I woulda come sooner.”
“How long has it been since the fire?” I ask.
“Three days,” Noah says. “They’re still goin’ through a lot of the rubble and doin’ a full investigation. Craig’s in the burn unit on life support. It’s not lookin’ good for him though.”
“Holy shit.” My heart races as I think back to who hit me. It was a tall guy who was scrawnier than Craig. “Pretty sure he had an accomplice because I saw someone on the other side of the barn before I got hit.”
Before we can continue the conversation, the nurse comes in. She asks about my pain level, checks my oxygen line, then brings me water. She warns me that I’ll have a scratchy throat and some coughing for a while, which is normal for having smoke inhalation. Then she tells me the doctor will be in later to discuss my treatment and when I can expect to be discharged.
“Where’s Jase?” I ask once she leaves.
“Um…” Noah lowers her eyes, and Damien’s lips turn into a frown as if he can sense something’s wrong. “He’s not comin’.”
“W-what do ya mean?” I ask gruffly, then sip more water.
“I’m gonna go so y’all can talk. I’ll be back tomorrow,” Damien says, patting my arm. “Glad you’re awake.”
“Thanks for comin’, man.”
“Ya know I always will.”
Noah’s glossy eyes stare at me as she waits until we’re alone. I’m not sure what’s going on, but the tension makes me uneasy.
“What is it?” I ask, my heart pounding as anxious nerves settle into my veins.
“Jase was missin’ for the first twenty-four hours, and no one could find him. I called, texted, contacted his work, and even had Waylon go to his place. Eventually, we gave the sheriff notice so he could keep an eye out for him, too. As far as I knew, he hadn’t been located, and since he hadn’t returned my calls, I hadn’t expected him to barge in here when I was clingin’ to you.”
Shit. I exhale a deep sigh.
“I take it…he knows, then?”
“The nurses told him his dad’s girlfriend hadn’t left his bedside in two days, and he put it together when he saw me. He didn’t even give me a chance to explain or tell him the full story. Took one look at me cryin’ next to you and walked right back out.”
Closing my eyes, I wish I’d been the one to tell him. Instead, he’s stewing in anger and feeling betrayed.
I place her hand on my chest, longing to hold her. She looks devastated. “Fuck, I’m sorry. I shoulda told him so he didn’t find out that way.”
“We couldn’t have known Craig and Ian were gonna torch the barn, and you’d get in the middle of it,” she says.
“Ian?”
She nods. “Caught him on camera.” Then she lowers her eyes again. “He didn’t survive.”
I blink a few times as if that’ll change the words she just said. “W-what? Why would Ian work with Craig? I hadn’t realized they knew each other.”
“Me neither, and I dunno. My guess is they met at the fundraiser or Ian reached out to him after I’d kicked him out. I was shocked.”
Even if Craig makes it out of the hospital, he’ll go to jail for arson and possibly manslaughter.
“Did ya ever find out where Jase was when no one could find him?” I ask.
“Yeah, the sheriff told me they found him at his friend’s mountain cabin a few hours north. They went fishin’ on the boat, and he had no cell service. He woulda had to have left town shortly after leavin’ my house or early the next mornin’ before I called him. Not sure it was planned because he never mentioned it to me.”
“Probably a guy from work. He’s talked about someone invitin’ him up for a weekend, but it coulda been last minute, who knows. That’s interestin’ though because he never used to like fishin’.”
“I’ve texted him all day. Even though he doesn’t respond, I’ve sent updates on your progress, but he leaves me on read.”
“He’ll come around. Give him time.”
“The only thing I wanna give him is an earful and chew his ass out for bein’ a shithead. Ya got hurt, and he didn’t even stay to hear if you’re okay.”
“I’m sure the nurse gave him an update,” I say, hopeful I’m right.
She takes out her phone. “Ya wanna call him?”
“Do ya know where mine is?”
“I assume in your truck. You stalker,” she teases, and it hits me she knows I was sleeping outside her house.
“Won’t apologize for that.” I wink.
“I’m gonna text him first so he knows it’s you and to pick up,” she explains before handing it to me. “Maybe FaceTime him?”
“Good idea.”
Once Noah’s message shows read, I call.
After five rings, he finally picks up.
“Jase?”
He stays silent as the screen points at the ceiling. If he doesn’t want to talk to me or look at me, that’s fine, but at least he’s willing to listen.
“It hurts to talk, Jase, but I’m gonna try my best so ya can hear this from me. I met Noah at the Franklin rodeo. We connected and spent the night together. We didn’t know who we were to each other in terms of you bein’ the link between us. All I knew was I felt somethin’ I hadn’t felt in years, and I wanted to explore it. Noah realized it after she learned my last name and ghosted me. When I found out she was a Hollis, I put the pieces together that she was the family I was workin’ for and tried tellin’ her before I arrived, but again, she ignored my calls. I didn’t know why until I showed up at the ranch, and she finally came clean.”
Noah hands me my water when my voice gives out. “You want me to continue the story?” she whispers, but I shake my head. I’m not stopping until Jase gets the full truth from me.
“She knew I was here for you and how I wanted to rebuild our relationship, so we decided to be just friends. I didn’t wanna risk hurtin’ ya or jeopardizin’ your trust.”
He snorts as if my words are bullshit, but I continue anyway, even if it makes me look bad.
“At first, we tried to stay away from each other. I know that sounds cliché, but we couldn’t and decided to secretly date to see how it’d go. Once it got serious, we’d tell ya and her parents. We didn’t wanna announce anythin’ until we knew it’d work out. But when I saw how upset ya were at the thought of her datin’ someone, I knew you’d never be okay with us together, and I broke it off.”
My heart aches at the way I’ve disappointed the two most important people in my life.
Noah holds up my water cup again, and I take a longer sip this time. My throat burns, but I keep going.
“When Noah got hurt, I blamed myself for not protectin’ her, and the guilt ate at me that she got injured on my watch. So I told her parents I’d help durin’ her recovery because even if we couldn’t be together, I still very much cared about her.”
“How’d ya end up in the barn?” Jase finally speaks.
I explained how being at her house so much was torturing her, so I opted to stop coming by so much, but I kept watch outside her house at night due to Craig making bail.
“Can’t say I’m completely surprised,” he says. “Maybe I shoulda noticed it earlier, but I figured I was overthinkin’ things. The way you two look at each other, how you were trainin’ with her and bringin’ her groceries. A part of me didn’t wanna see what was right in front of me.”
“I tried to keep my distance, but no matter what, I couldn’t help the way my eyes always found her whenever she was near,” I confess. “I’m sorry for not tellin’ ya.”
“So y’all aren’t together anymore?”
“Technically, no,” I say even though it hurts to admit. “But I dunno that I can stay away after this.”
I glance at Noah, who’s hanging on to every word but stays silent.
Jase finally shifts the phone so his face is in view.
“Ya broke up with her? For me?”
I nod. “For our relationship. I didn’t wanna lose ya.”
“It’d take a lot more than datin’ my ex-girlfriend to lose me, Dad. Not happy y’all lied and snuck around behind my back, but I don’t want y’all miserable on my behalf. You’ve suffered enough. You deserve someone as great as Noah.”
I choke up, not sure how to respond, but when happy, relieved tears surface, I don’t fight them.
“Good luck tellin’ her family, though.” He barks out a laugh, and I chuckle.
Noah blushes, moving closer so he can see her face.
“Took ya long enough to come to your senses, asshat. I was about to send Landen to knock some into ya,” she teases.
“I needed twenty-four hours to bleach out the images of ya two in my head,” he smarts off.
Noah rolls her eyes. “You’re so dramatic.”
“Ya realize he’s twice your age, right?” The corners of his lips curve up as he taunts her.
“You realize I’ll marry him and become your stepmom just to punish you, right?”
“Ooh, naughty stepmother fantasy just entered my mind.” Then he starts humming the theme song for PornHub, and I choke back a laugh. Noah has no idea where it’s from, which makes Jase sing it louder.
She rolls her eyes. “This is why I’m into older men.”
“You two fight like brother and sister. I dunno how y’all ever dated in the first place,” I say.
“Yeah, because you’re so mature…” Jase drawls in a mocking tone.
“Y’all need some boxin’ gloves to fight it out or what?”
“He knows I’d kick his ass, bad ankle or not,” Noah taunts smugly.
They banter for another minute before finally giving up. He promises to stop by tomorrow before we say goodbye. I’m relieved the air’s clear between the three of us. Now all we need to do is come clean to her family.
“Oh, I should tell ya. Gramma Grace and Momma know. So that only leaves my dad and brothers,” she tells me.
“Think if I tell them while I’m injured they’ll take it easy on me?”
She snorts, sitting on the bed next to me. “Only one way to find out.”
“Wait. I haven’t officially asked ya to be my girlfriend again.” I grab her hand and pull her as close as possible.
“Well, what’re ya waitin’ for, cowboy? Get on your knees and beg.”
Her serious tone makes me cough out a laugh. “If I could get out of this bed without the risk of fallin’ on my ass, I would plead with everythin’ I have.”
“Fair enough. I’ll just pretend ya are.” She smirks, and I know she’s messing with me.
Smiling, I pour my heart out to her. “You’ve been mine since I laid eyes on you. Even when we couldn’t be together, I was always yours.” Then I press my lips to her knuckles. “I’m madly and desperately in love with you, Goldie. Nothin’ would make me happier than you bein’ mine out in the open for everyone to know you own my heart.”
“Nothin’ would make me happier, either.” She beams, and I adore how happy she looks. “Fallin’ in love with you was so damn easy and tragic at the same time. I’m ready for the world to know.”
She inches closer until our mouths can finally touch. I hate that I can’t kiss her the way I want to, but I’d take a peck on the cheek from her if it was all I could ever have.
“Thank you for stayin’ here with me. Wakin’ up to your voice and seein’ your gorgeous face is the only way I ever wanna wake up again.”
She smirks, then sucks in her bottom lip. “I think that can be arranged.”