Heart of the Moon

Kieran’s POV ~

Hugging both their little bodies close.. I carried them out to their party. Calista had planned everything to perfection.. right down to the cake.. IronMan on one side.. and Spiderman gliding in on the other. The boys were in their element.. they didn’t stray far from my side.. and I was more than okay with that.

After the party, Calista had me come upstairs to the boys room.. she wanted me to be a hands on Dad.. which according to her is being present.. and helping the boys. We bathed them.. then dressed them in their new superhero pajamas.. which they loved! And I read them a story… which.. saw them sound asleep before the third page!

As I was getting ready to leave.. I asked “When will we start visitation? I am eager to begin!” She smiled and said “As eager as they are? How about we start with Saturday morning? The boys and I will arrive at your pack house around 7 a.m so you can have breakfast together. Depending on how the day progresses.. will determine if we stay overnight.”

I grinned at her.. seeing how deeply her stubborn streak runs.. I respond “ I can’t wait! I will have rooms prepared.. for them, and for you! Thank you, Calista!” She nods and sees me out the door.

On the way home, I asked the guys “Did y’all know that your mate can feel it when you’re fucking someone else?” Cole snickers “That’s like Goddess Doctrines 101, bro! Of course we kn….. Oh My Goddess! Callie felt it every time! DUDE! Best be pulling as many apologies out of your ass, as you can! No wonder she’s pissed! She knows how many times you’ve cheated!”

I growl and say “I didn’t cheat! We aren’t together! How is it cheating!?” Axel looks at me like I’m crazy “What the hell, Man!? Who are you? You may not have accepted her, Kieran.. but Onyx has! And Lenore accepted him. You are literally guilty of animal cruelty, right now! Abusing your own wolf!”

I feel like shit now! “I get it! I’m an asshole! I fucked up! Now help me fix this!” Cole laughed and asked “How are we supposed to help? And why are we helping? Is it just because of the twins? Or is our end goal to bring our Luna home?”

I tell them both, honestly “I don’t know. What if being with her weakens me?” Axel glares at me and asks “When we studied the doctrine in school? What the fuck were you doing? You passed it with a B.. How? When you know absolutely nothing about the mate bond!? Oh wait! You fucked your way into passing.. didn’t you? And she gave you a B??? Room for improvement, brother!”

I half grinned because he wasn’t wrong.. but then, I felt embarrassed.. because he IS right! It’s how I actually graduated! It interested me more than studying. Damn! That’s shameful!

Axel tells me “Meet me in the library, when we get home.. I want to show you something!” I nodded and realized I have a lot to learn.. and this time, I am going to listen. I am hating myself for causing her any pain. I hate myself for almost costing my sons their lives. I hate myself for making my mate hate me!

Once we were home, I decided to shower before joining the guys. I opened the door to my room… and something was off.. I turned to the bed and flipped the light. Valerie was lying on my bed… naked.. I yelled “Get Out! Pack your shit and move back to the women’s quarters… NOW!” She ran down the hall, naked.. and wailing. Goddess help me not to strangle that bitch!

I met the guys in the library and I asked Cole to make sure Valerie is moved out. I don’t want her living in the pack house when my boys are here. I looked at Axel “What are you going to show me?” I poured us each a whiskey and sat down.. he said he wanted me to read something, actually.. I told him to read it to me.. I am not in the mood!

He tells me “Okay.. but don’t interrupt me.. wait until I’m done. There’s two separate parts in the mate chapter.. so I will read one.. we can talk.. then I’ll read the other one.

As I’m nodding, Cole comes back in and lets me know she’s gone.. but she was pissed! Screaming like a banshee how I was going to pay. That’s fine. I’ll take my chances.

Axel says.. “Okay.. Listen.. According to doctrines on mates.. Once physical contact is made between mates, the bond forms. If that contact is intimate, the bond strengthens. Even if the bond is not accepted, by either party… or one rejects the other and it’s not accepted… and no matter how far apart they are.. when one cheats, the other feels it. It is an excruciating pain that feels like your insides are being ripped apart. She-wolves have been known to claw themselves to death trying to stop the pain. If a she-wolf is pregnant, there is an eighty-five percent chance she will miscarry and possibly hemorrhage. Male wolves have gone feral.”

He looks up from the book and asks “You okay, bro?” I shook my head “No! I’m not okay. I could have killed my mate! My heart is sick and I don’t like myself, right now!” Cole puts his hand on my shoulder “I know it’s alot, dude. But you didn’t know. Imagine knowing it would hurt your mate.. and doing it anyway. At least you’re not THAT guy!”

They both chuckle and I tell him “Great pep talk, Brother!” He grins and says “Thanks! I’m here every night at nine!” Axel clears his throat and tells us to listen to the second part.

“Mates are two halves of one whole. The Goddess creates mates at birth. They are designed to be each other’s strengths. An Alpha, for instance, is incapable of running a pack correctly, without his Luna counterpart. The Alpha is the head of a pack.. the members are the body of a pack.. the warriors are the legs. The Luna, though.. is the heart of a pack. A pack can not and will not survive without its’ heart”

I dropped my head in my hands “What have I done? How do I fix this?” Cole answers “Remember, the bond is intact.. the more time you spend together.. the stronger it will become. Your wolves will be pushing for intimacy. Tell her every day you’re sorry.. Prove to her.. every day.. you are sorry!”

Axel says “It’s the little things.. fixing her a plate of food.. holding her chair.. or a door.. opening her car door.. pouring her a cold drink.. foot rubs. Those are the things women notice. Not any big grandiose gestures! When you’re with her, be there! Be Present!”

I sit thinking everything they’ve said over and over in my head. Then it comes to me! I know what I have to do! I tell the guys good night and head to my room.. As I walk in, I groan.. I strip the sheets and throw them out the door. I put a new set of sheets on my bed and laid down.

I pulled out my phone and pulled up Calista’s number and typed out a text

Me: I want you to know I truly am sorry. We came home and I went over the Goddess’s doctrine. I never realized I was hurting you. I would never have done it, otherwise. My experience with mates was not a good one, and I projected that onto us. I see that now. I am going to prove to you that I want this! I want us! Good night, Calista. 🥰

Note to self : Burn the bed!