Happily Never After

“LOOK AT THIS.”

I glanced up as my dad charged into my office with his phone in his hand, a satisfied grin on his face.

“I would like to introduce you,” he said, shoving his phone in front of my face, “to my new favorite son.”

I glanced down, and no, he hadn’t adopted a baby.

My father was showing me a boat.

“Made an offer on this baby an hour ago. Isn’t it gorgeous?”

I sat back in the chair and took the phone from his hand. It was a twenty-seven-foot red pontoon boat.

“That’s a helluva lot of boat for someone who’s never had a boat,” I said, just to mess with him.

“May I repeat—new favorite son?”

“It’s beautiful,” I said, handing back his phone. “Does Mom know?”

“She’s already requested it be called the Lorna,” he said, grinning.

“So you seriously made an offer?” What did this mean, exactly? “With her permission?”

“And I have you to thank,” he said. “For all the milk.”

Holy shit. I rubbed my eyebrow and said, “I mean, I—”

“See, I set up notifications on my phone, so I know every time you or Sophie post something.” He looked proud of his tech savviness. “You bet your ass I run and show your mother every single one.”

That made me feel a little dishonest. “We’re just friends, Dad. I don’t want her to get the wrong idea.”

I wasn’t sure why I was sabotaging myself with that correction, but I didn’t like the feeling of tricking my own mother.

“And she knows that. I tell her every time that you’re just friends. And do you know what she says?”

“What?” I asked, not sure what I wanted the answer to be.

“She says she knows, but she has a good feeling about it. She says that as long as you have Sophie as a friend, she thinks she might be ready.”

“For what?” I asked, unable to believe my ears.

“I’m not sure, but it’s about damn time!” He started laughing, and the man was obviously giddy about the possibility of retiring in the near future. “She’s started emailing the golf courses near the Florida house about league info, so I’m just quietly waiting for her to schedule the movers.”

That made me feel like less of an asshole, since they both deserved a relaxing life of retirement.

In fact, maybe it was time for Sophie and me to kick it up a notch.