Gamma No More - Book 3

For the next month, Toni had been working closely with the new wolves she’d rescued and her own two pack members along with their parents, trying to rebuild and support them in getting over their trauma and breaking down the barrier of interacting with ranked wolves across the pack.

Never again does she want someone to fear talking to any member of the leadership.

Diane and Yennifer had become supportive of each other until finally, a friendship had formed between them which was benefitting them both, but especially Diane, as it helped her form a bond with the pack that she didn’t fear.

She’d talked to the team that went with her and none had appeared to have concerns over the sentences, but to her, it still sat heavily on her shoulders, even the words of the Prince about accepting who she was, didn’t mean she could forgive it as much as others did.

The crux of the issue is that she had allowed a pathetic excuse of an Alpha to remain in position and she was running with the guilt.

Today, she was running the border, just letting Tyra run and marking the new pack boundaries. It was a job always done by the Alpha.

There’s a formal process in setting a boundary, a kind of magic. It’s how a wolf will feel the tug to know they have broken a boundary; others can set a temporary boundary with a lot of scent marking, but it takes an Alpha to create the strong permanent boundary line.

In reality, this run is serving two purposes, increasing the land they claim as theirs, that’s down to Tyra as they run, but Toni, well Toni is sitting way down deep ceding control to Tyra and using each step to accept the actions she took a month ago.

There were others from the Shadow Stalkers’ pack that she was sure she could have taken with them, but they had limited car space and time and it was all Toni could do to not head back and watch the pack some more, she couldn’t save everyone, and sometimes people had to want to save themselves, after all, that packs Alpha wasn’t strong enough to force them to stay.

Sometimes, it’s hard not to second guess yourself. It doesn’t matter how confident you are; it happens.

And everything about my upbringing, ensured I became self-sufficient, but also a loner, so having to make decisions that affected so many wolves… well just because I’ve appeared confident in a decision, it doesn’t mean deep down I don’t question myself.

I keep thinking back to the Shadow Stalkers’ pack and the fact I left Alpha Randall in charge, not that there was a reasonable second option to choose from out of the leadership.

So while I could have deposed him, it’s not like I can stick around and lead them all, sorting out their pack needs to start from within, which is why I left him with my threat…

And I will go back… oh yes, and when I do, I will make sure Alpha Randall knows I am watching him, see that’s more where my experience lies… making him sweat.

Hey, thanks for listening. I think you’ve helped me see things more clearly!

Now turn up the music, it relaxes me.

Her frustration comes out as a low, deep growl scattering a flock of birds in the trees above her. Is this world so messed up that every pack is corrupt? She thinks to herself.

But no, the Deadfalls pack. They are the light in her otherwise bleak mind; they are not corrupt, nor are the Lowlands pack and neither is hers. All of that grounds her and she knows they are worth fighting for.

A few bad packs shouldn’t taint her understanding of the world at large, although change, genuine change has to happen. That’s what her inner voice, the one that demands justice, is telling her. She just doesn’t yet know how they can achieve it.

She tries to stop thinking about the situation with the other packs as she has a bigger issue to worry about, that of informing them she is a Lycan, because if the information gets out, then she has to assume that it will put her pack at risk, given the history of wolf kind.

As she continued around the new pack border once more, to strengthen the boundary, she smiled at how big their pack land was; they don’t need it, but hell, no one else is up here to contest it, but they have a lot of land to run in and that’s never a bad thing.

And if the worst comes, and the pack is not happy that she is a Lycan, then she can live as an outlier or lone wolf, outside of this boundary, to keep the pack safe.

Tyra growls at Toni’s thoughts.

We are Alpha; we are strong

Toni rolls her eyes before replying

We are also a risk to the pack Tyra, so something we need to consider

Tyra huffs at her as they make their way back to the pack. Toni is very clear about what Tyra wants, but she has to look at this logically.

Making her way back to the pack office, she mind links Fee along with all her pack leadership, it’s time to tell them and their mates that she is a Lycan, because she needs others to help come up with tactics to protect the pack.

At the moment only Karl and Leah from her pack know she’s a Lycan, so the people she tells today will provide her with a hint of how the rest of the pack will take the information, she has three Deltas, two of which are mated, then there is Tommy and Laura, her Gamma couple and Fee, she deserved to be there to explain the strange test she had to do at the barbeque.

So today eight people will find out her secret.

Taking a deep breath, she stepped into her office.

“OK, make yourselves comfortable. I need to tell you something that so far, only Karl and Leah know, and I commanded them to keep it quiet.

Think of yourselves as the trial group before I tell the pack.

Questions you have, no matter what you want to ask, are valid ones and I’d like you to voice them, even if they seem rude. This is an open session, ranks are unimportant.”

Toni takes a moment to compose her thoughts. There’s no way she can prepare them for the information, so time to rip off the band aid, she thinks.

“I’m not just a werewolf, as the Vampires had Fee prove a little while back. I hold a different base scent.”

Toni glances at Karl and Leah, who both nod encouragingly, not that she needs it.

“I’m a Lycan.”

The looks on their faces are ones of shock and disbelief as they process the information.

“It came as a shock to me, both my parents were wolves, but let’s call it a freak of nature. I haven’t yet shifted into my third form, but it was Lord Leif who first spotted it.

How he spotted it doesn’t matter for now, but when I questioned it, he and the Prince had Fee do a tracker test, she spotted a difference between me and the other wolves.

There are other traits, like Tyra being able to contact any wolf without a pack bond being in place, that I’ve noticed over the years, the fact I was always stronger than I should have been were all hints, so while I didn’t want to believe it at first, I’ve grown to accept it, but now it’s time to tell the pack and you are the first to find out.

Take your time to digest the information.”

She sits back, but Leah walks over after pouring Toni a coffee and places a supporting hand over hers before she turns to the rest of the room.

“Toni had already told Karl and me, it came as a shock to us, but the more we thought about it, the more it made sense.

As you know, Karl was originally the Alpha, but his wolf wanted to defer to Tyra right from the offset, so let your wolf guide you. I think they see it more clearly than our human sides.”

Leah smiles once more at Toni before she sits back down, as Toni takes a sip of coffee, waiting for the first person to talk.

“Why haven’t you told us sooner?”

It’s Brendan, her newest Delta, who asks,

“Initially because I found it hard to believe, I’ve wavered between being sure and having doubts as I haven’t shifted yet.

Add to that, the pack is at risk because of me normally, then if it gets out I am also a Lycan, well, I’m concerned it makes the pack a bigger target.

The last Lycans died out centuries ago, although not all their DNA was, clearly, or I wouldn’t be here, but I have been most concerned about the risks to everyone else, so I need to make sure we put the pack’s security as a priority.”

Toni shrugs

Ezra is grinning like a Cheshire cat.

“That’s how you kept the Shadow Stalkers’ pack controlled, dammit that is going to be so handy, but I knew something was odd, no way should you have kept all those ranked wolves in check so easily.” He pauses briefly.

“We need to set up a harder training session for you, working with the Delta’s so we know how to complement your skills, work out your limits because you probably haven’t hit them yet, so we can plan the best ways to protect the pack.”

Brendan and Di, the remaining Deltas, both nod in agreement enthusiastically.

“I don’t think it matters if you are a Lycan or not Toni,” Tommy starts.

“At least until you shift, if anyone claims you are a Lycan without seeing your third form, no one will believe it.

So, we have a little time, I assume, until that point comes, to get ready and before then, we have total deniability because hell, who will think it’s true?

But we also need to think about how the balance of power in the packs will shift once people find out about you and plan for that, because that’s when things will get dangerous.”

Toni’s eyes look to Fee and the people who haven’t yet spoken.

“Guy’s thoughts?”

“It’s freaking awesome!” Fee exclaims a little too enthusiastically, having a fan-girl moment.

“I won’t say I’m not concerned,” Laura, her Gamma female, mused before she continued.

“But we’re a bunch of misfits and outcasts, so who better to house a Lycan than us?”

Laura pauses deep in thought, but it’s Ezra’s mate Katie that pipes up

“What happens if you become the target as a Lycan and they eventually do a full sweep up here?”

Toni thinks for a moment

“Worst case, I hand over the Alpha role to Karl, if I have time, let him lead the pack and I can live the life of a Lone wolf, here or on a different continent.

That takes the focus off of you and at that point, you can claim I misled you and apply for formal membership.”

Toni looks around the room. She can see there are unhappy faces in the room and a bit of mind linking going on.

“Sorry we had a brief private chat, but that’s won’t work for us.

You wouldn’t abandon us if the roles were reversed, so we need to come up with a different plan.”

It’s Brendan’s mate, Sasha, that has spoken up.

“I think you need to tell the pack and get them working as a group to come up with a plan. No one will want to lose you.”

Toni looks at Sasha,

“You get that me stepping down is safest for you all?” she asked.

“No, definitely not. You stepping down leaves us all at risk, but as a Lycan, you are the deterrent, people won’t know what to expect.

If we need a backup plan, we’ll plant explosives in the pass, block off the entry point, and give us time to evacuate as a group.”

Brendan’s mouth is open, looking at his mate as if for the first time.

Grinning, she looks at him.

“What do you think months of me listening to you talk tactics over drinks wouldn’t rub off on me?

And since you thought the Alpha was our strongest defence before, then as a Lycan, that’s got to have increased!”

Karl grins at how this group has taken the news.

“Think it’s time you called a pack meeting Toni.

I’ll arrange some follow-up sessions for questions, both with you and with some of the founding members who didn’t want ranked positions. That way, they may be more open to voicing their concerns.”