FORGET ME NOT

"We're going to the beach again, Chef," ani Zoey na sinabayan siya sa pasilyo ng resort. Naka-swimsuit na ito sa ilalim ng see through na sarong. "Alam mo, I really love it here... Ibang-iba sa kabusyhan ng lungsod. Nakakarelax. Seems like everyone's taking their time. Hindi nagmamadali."

"Kaya nga ayaw kong umalis dito," nakangiti niyang turan sa napakagandang panauhin.

"Nakakainggit ka, Chef. Narito ang buhay mo sa San Gabriel." Sinipat nito ang suot na relo. "What's taking Kaden so long?"

Tumingin siya sa direksyong pinagmulan nila.

"Here he comes," she told Zoey as she caught a sight of Kaden walking towards them.

Naka-tshirt na puti ito at board shorts. The doctor was looking great as always. Mabilis siyang nag-iwas ng tingin nang magtama ang paningin nila.

"Kaden and I grew up together. But I still couldn't help falling for him everyday..." Kumapit sa braso niya si Zoey while looking at her fiance dreamily.

"He looks like he's so in love with you too, Zoey..." She told her sincerely.

"Yeah. Sometimes I wonder if I could ever live without him."

"Are you talking about me?" Pabirong tanong ng binata nang makalapit. "Sorry to disappoint you ladies, but I'm taken."

Inismiran ito ni Zoey while Hope managed a ten percent amused and ninety percent hurt smile.

"By this beautiful fashionista here," bawi ni Kaden na inakbayan si Zoey bago hinalikan sa noo. Pakiramdam tuloy niya sa kanya talaga nito sinabi ang 'sorry I'm taken' joke nito kanina.

"Hmp!" Zoey pouted.

"Napakamatampuhin naman," Kaden said.

Nag-excuse na siya nang halikan nito si Zoey sa labi sa mismong harapan niya. She couldn't bear to see that. That was despite the decision that she made about moving forward.

She already found out the truth about Kaden's connection with Rain. And she chose the most hurtful decision she would ever make. To let go of the memories of the past and let go of the very man who once promise forever with her... Rain did come back. Only that he wasn't Rain anymore. He was Kaden Aragon, he's got a fiancee and he doesn't remember her.

Matamlay siyang ngumiti habang sinusundan ng tingin ang papalayong mga panauhin. They were a picture of a real happy couple.

After that confrontation with Kaden, she came to realize that Kaden and Rain are the same person. She didn't need any paperwork to prove that. She could feel it. But the truth still came like a hard punch in the gut. Mahirap gawin pero kailangan niyang pakawalan si Rain, lalo na dahil hindi naman nito sinadyang kalimutan siya... He didn't mean hurting her. He didn't mean breaking his promise...

There was no Rain Sanchez.

Because he was Kaden Aragon from the very beginning. The young doctor met an accident almost four years ago and lost his memory. Upon his body's full recovery, he went missing. He returned two years ago.

The time when he was missing was the period of time Hope had him in San Gabriel. He was indeed in that bus. They weren't able to find him because his IDs were all Kaden Aragon. And he was immediately transferred to Manila. He recovered his memory. But sad to say, his accident a year before that was the last piece he remembered.

That wasn't the truth that she had hoped. It should have been the other way around. Wala dapat Kaden Aragon dahil may Rain Sanchez. But it turned out that Hope just played a part in his life when he lost his memory. And when he recovered it, she lost that part.

'Walang may alam kung saan siya galing at bakit sakay siya ng bus na iyon. Jake just filled in that blank because he knew that Rain existed here during that time.' Myca told her then.

If Hope would try to look back at that specific time when Rain took the bus, hindi iyon galing lang sa San Gabriel. Dumaan na iyon sa iba't ibang bayan bago ito sumakay. Kung 'yong galing lang sana sa bayan nila ang sinakyan nito then Kaden's search, if he did search, would be narrowed down to one town. Unfortunately that time, nakabyahe na ang lahat ng mangilan'ngilan lang na bus ng San Gabriel.

Wala siyang ideya kung bakit ibang pangalan ang ipinakilala ni Kaden noon. Pero naniniwala siya na hindi nito sinadyang saktan siya sa ganoong paraan.

Still, she remembered what Rain told her -

'I couldn't like anyone here, Hope, especially you! I don't want to like you. I don't want to have this obligation to stay here for anyone! I am so confused. I couldn't fall in love...'

That was what he said. Sana pala tinanong niya kung bakit... Rain was adamant not to fall in love while he was in San Gabriel because he knew that he couldn't stay. That's why he told her she ruined it when he couldn't help but fell for her. Hindi sinadya ni Rain na saktan siya gaya ng hindi nito sinadyang mahalin siya. And during the short time that they were together, wala naman itong ibang ginawa kundi pasayahin siya at mahalin araw araw...

Naiintindihan na niya ngayon kung bakit noong mga huling pagkakataon ay malalim ang iniisip nito. He might have started recovering his memory while he was yet with her. What she couldn't understand was why he chose to keep her in the dark side when he could have told her the truth. Sigurado naman siyang maiintindihan niya. Hindi siya magagalit. But he chose to lie.

'Wait for me, Hopie. May kailangan lang akong ayusin sa Maynila. After that, hindi na ako aalis... I love you and I'm gonna marry you...'

That was what he told her before he rode the bus. That was their last conversation. That was Rain's last promise.

Hope shed a tear. Hindi na matutupad ni Rain iyon. He was gone. Forever. Because he's engaged to someone else.

"Aren't you going to tell him?" Myca asked. Nasa tabi na pala niya ang kaibigan.

"No. He's happy now. Telling him won't change anything." Mapait siyang ngumiti. "Kaden loves Zoey. She's a wonderful person. He deserves someone like her..."

"Sigurado ka ba? Because I think he ought to know. You can complete the puzzle of his whereabouts noong wala siyang alaala."

"Myca, if he wanted to know about us, dapat naghanap siya. Dapat noong makita niya ang pictures ni Rain, dapat naisip niyang siya iyon. No. He said he didn't know him."

Although dalawang araw after he found out about Rain, naging extra careful nito sa pakikisama sa kanya. Ayaw raw nito na makita niya rito si Rain. That was a little harsh pero tama naman kasi si Kaden. Makabubuti sa kanila ang ganoong set up lalo na dahil hindi alam ni Zoey ang natuklasan nito.

"Okay. Ikaw ang bahala. Bukas, aalis na sila. You have twenty-four hours to think. After that, hindi mo na siya ulit makikita."

"Thanks, Myca... For finding out the truth."

*****

"CHEF HOPE."

"Kaden," napalingon siya sa binatang tumawag sa pangalan niya. Naglilinis na siya sa kusina after dinner para makapagpahinga na rin nang sumulpot na naman ito sa kusina. "Need a hand?" Tanong nito habang nakatingin sa mga hugasin niya.

"No." Umiling siya. "The night is young doctor and it's your last here, why don't you go enjoy instead?"

"Tulog na si Zoey. Maaga kasi kami aalis bukas." Lumapit ito sa kanya sa lababo.

"Exactly. You need to rest early." Inilayo niya ang sponge nang akma nitong kukunin iyon mula sa kanya.

"Hindi pa ako inaantok. I was going to have a walk outside when I saw you. Tingin ko mas okay kung tutulungan na lang kita."

"Kaden, guest ka rito."

"I insist."

*****

THERE was hesitation in her eyes and he understood perfectly why. But Kaden decided he would try to end everything tonight.

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Five days. He have been experiencing the feeling of deja vu. At hindi naman siya clueless sa possibility. For two years now, sinisikap niyang alamin kung nasaan siya noong wala siyang maalala.

Feeling nga niya pinaglalaruan na siya ng isip niya tuwing mapupunta siya sa isang lugar at makakaramdam siya ng familiarity. Hindi siya makapag-decide if those were already the missing piece of his memory or not.

Until he set foot in San Gabriel. It had been an overwhelming feeling- seeing a place and its people for the first time and yet he felt like he'd been there. He felt like he lived there. Lalo na sa mismong resort. It was funny how he knew exactly where the facilities were and yet he'd never been there.

Pero hindi lang doon nagtatapos ang kakaibang pakiramdam niya. Actually, it started when he saw this woman standing at the bus stop...

He knew how to find Myca's dahil uso naman ang GPS. Pero tumigil pa rin siya para magtanong.

Kung kilalang-kilala mo ang isang tao, kahit malayo, nakahalo sa karamihan o matagal kayong hindi magkita, makikilala mo ito. Gano'n ang pakiramdam niya nang makita niya si Hope na naghihintay ng bus. He felt like he knew her. Although he didn't exactly know how.

"Tulungan na kita," inagaw niya rito ang sponge bago pa nito iyon mailayo ulit.

"Kaden!" She exclaimed nang lagyan niya ito ng bula sa pisngi, paano kasi, para itong natulala na maiiyak.

It struck him. Her eyes were the most lonely pair he had ever seen. And it somehow pained him for the reason he didn't know.

"Cheer up, Chef!" He grinned at her as he put another on her forehead.

"Hinahamon mo ako sa ganyan?" She slowly broke into a smile.

"Yeah?"

Ipinilig-pilig nito ang ulo in a warming up gesture. Ilang saglit pa ay para na silang mga bata na naghahabulan sa kusina.

Hope was laughing. She was happy. For the first time in five days, he saw her smiling and genuinely laughing. And Kaden must admit, the sight of the happy Chef brought a warm tingling sensation inside him like it mattered so much to see her like that.

Since seeing her happy pictures with Rain, he had secretly wished to see her smiling again.

Speaking of Rain, Hope's boyfriend looks so much like him.

What are the odds? The chances, that two different individuals would look so much the same? Wala siyang kakambal. Wala rin siyang kapatid na lalaki. Lalong wala siyang clone.

Unless, Rain was him... Was his search finally over? Hindi naman sa babalikan niya ang parte na iyon ng buhay niya. Gusto lang niyang malaman kung ano ang nangyari habang wala siyang maalala. "Chef..." He said, natapos na silang maghugas and the laughter already died down.

"Coffee, Doctor?" She asked.

"Yes... Please."

Nagpunta sila sa porch na dala-dala ang mga kape nila.

"Kaden--" Hope called nang makaupo na sila, bahagya siya nitong nilingon, her eyes were sad again. "Thank you for tonight," she added.

"No problem."

Silence.

He'd got to ask her about Rain. Or else, aalis na sila ni Zoey at wala na siyang pagkakataon pang malaman ang gusto niyang malaman.

"Hope... " umpisa niya. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," mahina nitong pagpayag.

"About Rain... Where is he now?"

Matagal bago ito sumagot. He thought she wouldn't answer.

"I'm sorry... I shouldn't have asked---"

"He's dead," she answered, nakatingin ito sa langit na para bang iniisip nitong 'andoon si Rain at binabantayan ito.

He felt a strange pain in his chest at the knowledge of the beautiful Chef losing a loved one. Pero bukod doon, hindi niya maintindihan ang panghihinayang na naramdaman niya sa katotohanang patay na si Rain. Because that would mean na hindi siya si Rain. Hindi pa rin pala tapos ang paghahanap niya.

"I'm sorry..."

"It's okay. Matagal na iyon."

Silence.

"Kaden... Will you do me a favor?"

"Anything."

"My ring..." Tinanggal nito iyon sa daliri nito "I think it's making me a captive of the past. Will you please throw this away for me?" Iniabot nito ang singsing nito sa kanya which he took and held for a while. Parang may kumirot sa puso niya nang makita ang markang iniwan ng singsing sa daliri nito. It looked like she never took it off before and now she finally decided to let it go.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," 'yong pagtango nito may kasama ng luha and once again, he felt her pain.

Tumayo siya at bumwelo.

"Are you really sure?"

"I am."

He pretended throwing the ring. But he didn't throw it. He couldn't. Parang may pwersang pumipigil sa kanya. Rain perhaps?

His heart broke nang makita niyang umiiyak si Hope. She thought her ring was really gone. Ibinulsa niya iyon at nilapitan ito.

"Promise me you won't go looking for it in the morning."

Tumango ito sa pagitan ng pagluha.

"Can I ask you another favor?" She asked "Can I hug you? I wasn't able to bid Rain goodbye properly... You look like him... Would you, even just for few seconds appear as Rain in front of me?" Patuloy nitong pinipilit ngumiti sa kabila ng 'di maampat na pagluha nito.

He didn't answer but he moved to surround her with his arms. That feeling- when it felt like you wanted to hold someone forever...

'Snap out of it Kaden... You're getting married with Zoey...'