Forever Wild (Wildcat Hockey Book 5)

EVERLY

Tyler crushes me in a hug. “Fuck, I missed you,” he says as he pulls back. He looks me over with a smile. “You look good. Being a career woman suits you.”

I flash him the best smile I can, certain if he stares too long, he’ll see right through me. Luckily, I’m saved by Piper.

“Your hair!” Her eyes are wide as she stares at me.

“I keep forgetting,” I say as I run a hand over the short strands self-consciously. I’m still not quite used to the new cut just above my shoulders.

“It looks great.” Piper beams at me. “We’re so proud of you.”

“Me too.” I let out a shallow breath. I can’t seem to get a full breath since I parked the car. My gaze won’t allow me to look around the party. The same way it wouldn’t let me look too closely at the cars parked in Tyler and Piper’s driveway.

I knew coming back that I would run into Jack. There’s no way he won’t be at Charlotte’s birthday party. I know these guys. They’ll all be here. That’s what they do. They show up for each other.

But not looking for him makes me feel in control, like I’m wielding my attention like a weapon and not giving a single fuck if he’s here or not. God, I wish that were true.

It’s been almost a month since I’ve seen or talked to him. I packed up the very next day after he told me we couldn’t be anything and I headed for Briar Lake. I settled into my place, cut my hair, and vowed that I was going to forget about Jack and crush my internship. I was successful in at least one of those things.

Looking out of the corner of my eye to the guys hanging around the living room, I spot Ash, Declan, and Leo. Plus Nick and his son Aidan. Seeing Nick reminds me of that last time I saw him at Wild’s with Jack, but when I smile at him, he doesn’t give me any indication that he knows anything.

The guys all wave their hellos. Ash pulls me into a hug that lifts my feet off the ground. Declan attempts to give me a one-arm hug, but I wrap myself around his middle. I breathe each of them in. I’m closer to some more than others, but I’m so happy to see each of them.

“Where’s the birthday girl?” I ask after I’ve said hello to everyone else.

“Still napping,” Piper says. “But come check out the cake. It’s the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.”

Piper drags me along behind her through the living room. I breathe a sigh of relief when we enter the kitchen and the only people in here are Scarlett, Jade, and Bridget. Maybe Jack decided not to come. The thought fills me with more sadness than expected. But only because Charlotte deserves to have everyone show up to celebrate her.

“Oh my gosh!!” Bridget squeals and hurries toward me, engulfing me in a hug that’s tighter than even Tyler’s. “I missed you so, so, so much!”

She keeps squeezing me until the other women laugh.

“Let her breathe, Bridge.” Scarlett comes up behind her.

Bridget’s hold loosens. “Sorry. I just…” She gives me one last hard squeeze and steps back. “It’s so good to see you. It hasn’t been the same without you.”

Her words make a lump form in my throat. It hasn’t been the same without them either but admitting that feels a little bit like failure. Maybe it’s not such a good thing that I need them all so much. I should have my own life outside of Tyler’s teammates and their wives. Isn’t that what they all wanted for me?

I hug each of them and they gush over my hair and my clothes and ask me about my internship. I shrug off as many questions as I can and turn the focus back on them. It isn’t that things are going badly, the opposite actually, I just want to hear about them.

Their kids, their summer vacations, their jobs…I’ve missed out on all of it and I’m eager for every little detail. Bridget and I have kept in touch the most. We text and video chat nearly every day, but in person I can look into her face as she talks and see just how happy she is.

I don’t know if I took my parents for granted or if they were too absent for me to ever have this type of relationship with them, but these people are the family I always wanted. I don’t take it for granted now. I cherish every second of it.

“Is my mom coming?” I ask Piper when the conversation hits a lull.

Her face answers before she does, mouth turning down in a slight frown. “No, she couldn’t make it.”

I can’t imagine what could possibly be more important on a Saturday afternoon, but I guess I’m not that surprised. I want Charlotte to have the kind of grandma she deserves. Someone who shows up and showers her with all the love and attention.

“Her favorite person is here and that’s all that matters.” Piper squeezes my hand. “Let’s go see if she’s awake.”

We go back out to the living room. My steps falter. Piper doesn’t notice, her attention goes straight to Charlotte.

“There she is,” Piper coos at her daughter. Tyler is holding the birthday girl, bouncing around and talking to her, and she’s waving her arms around happily with a slobbery grin.

I take in my adorable niece, but it’s the man standing next to Tyler that has my feet rooted to the floor.

My stomach drops and my chest feels like it could crack down the middle.

Jack’s dark-blue eyes lock onto me and hold me prisoner. Only seconds pass but a million thoughts and memories flash through my mind. Jack smiling at me. Jack kissing me. Jack breaking my heart.

That’s been the hardest thing to admit. I don’t let guys break my heart. I don’t let them in and I don’t fall for them. But I did both of those things with Jack without even realizing it. It was supposed to be a fun fling. Instead, he wedged his way in without trying. I should have been more careful, but he’s the last person I ever thought would hurt me.

I wonder what flashes through his mind when he sees me. Does he look back at those weeks we hung out and regret them?

Piper moves toward Ty and Charlotte and I follow behind her, standing on the opposite side and making Tyler a barrier. Not that it keeps the heat of Jack’s gaze from reaching me.

Charlotte grins at me, angling her body so far that Tyler is forced to hand her over to me.

“I think she missed you too,” Tyler says as I take his daughter. My heart squeezes as I hug her to my chest. The pictures and videos I’ve demanded Piper and Tyler send me weekly didn’t do the changes in my niece justice. Her dark hair is longer, curling up at the ends. She’s bigger and her features are more defined. And when she smiles, I can see she’s gotten more teeth too.

“I can’t believe how big she’s gotten.” I grin at her. “What has your daddy been feeding you?”

“Everything but green beans. The kid hates green beans,” Ty says.

“Nobody likes them,” I whisper to her loud enough that Tyler and Piper can hear.

“Speaking of food, should we let everyone eat?” Piper asks.

“Yeah. Good idea. I think the guys are ready.” Tyler nods his head to where Declan is staring into the kitchen longingly. It could be he’s looking at his wife or it could be the boxes of pizza stacked up in front of her. My guess is both.

“Let’s eat,” Piper calls over the noise of the room. The rush to the kitchen is immediate.

“Want me to take her so you can eat,” Piper asks me, nodding toward Charlotte.

“No way. I just got her.”

Piper laughs then says, “I’ll make you a plate.”

Everyone else heads toward the kitchen, but I hang back. So does Jack. I keep my focus on Charlotte but I can feel him watching me.

He steps closer and my body tenses.

“Hey.” His deep voice sends a wave of longing through me.

“Hi,” I reply without looking at him.

Charlotte doesn’t prove to be a very good wing woman. She turns her attention to him, tipping her head back and grinning wider. When she flings a hand toward him, he reaches out and she takes his finger. He jostles her hand lightly and Charlotte laughs like he’s funny. When has Jack ever been funny?

“How’ve you been?” he asks me.

“Good. You?” My pulse races but I focus extremely hard on making polite conversation.

Instead of answering he says, “Ty says the internship is going well.”

Somewhere deep down—very deep down—I want to handle this maturely. I can’t avoid Jack. I knew I would run into him, and I don’t want it to be weird. He doesn’t get to ruin my favorite place with all my favorite people. However, the anger that sizzles just below the surface of my cool demeanor makes it very difficult to hold back the cutting remarks on the tip of my tongue.

“We don’t need to do this,” I say, finally meeting his gaze. An unfortunate mistake because goddamn, why is he so attractive? Grumpy, happy, beard, no beard, looking at me like I’m the most important person in the world or like he’s filled with regret. There’s no expression or change that makes him anything less than devastating. “We weren’t really friends before and we don’t need to be friends now.”

“Ev…” His voice breaks on my name.

I’m saved by Piper hurrying back with a plate. “I had to fight for this.”

“Thanks.” I take it in one hand.

Her stare moves to Jack. “You better get in there before it’s all gone.”

He nods and his mouth pulls into a smile. He casts me one last look before leaving.

Piper glances between us but says nothing as she leaves me with her daughter and a plate of food. I go sit on the couch and set the plate on the coffee table. Charlotte stands in front of me, using my legs for balance. She isn’t walking yet, but she’s getting close.

With a chubby hand, she grabs a strawberry from my plate, then holds it up proudly before sticking it in her mouth.

“It’s a good thing you’re so cute,” I tell her. People trickle back in with their own plates. Jack stays on the other side of the room, but I can feel his gaze on me often.

After food, we all watch Charlotte open her presents. It requires a lot of help because she’s almost more interested in the wrapping paper and ribbons than the gifts inside. Callum, Scarlett and Leo’s son, is happy to tear open anything she’s not interested in.

“Easy,” Leo says, picking him up so he doesn’t ravage through them all. He kicks his feet and whines but then Leo puts him up on his shoulders and that seems to make him magically forget about the presents.

When she opens my gift of paints and markers, Tyler quirks a brow at me. “Really?”

“They’re waterproof,” I say as I fight a smile.

“I’ll put those somewhere up high.” Piper takes them and then sets another box in front of her. It’s the biggest of all, long and skinny and wrapped immaculately in pink and white paper with pink ribbons and bows.

Tyler bends down to help Charlotte and when they finally get it open, the guys all laugh. I lean to get a better view. Charlotte pulls out a hockey stick with a wide grin. It’s kid size but still looks far too big for her.

“Da-da!”

There’s a chorus of “aww” as Tyler takes it from her. “That’s right. It’s just like mine.”

Tyler flips the stick around. He pauses, staring at the blade, and then looks over at Jack. “Really, Wyld? You got my daughter a signed hockey stick?”

His lips curve up and a faint blush creeps into his cheeks. “It’s never too early to get a hockey stick in her hands.” He juts his chin toward the box. “There’s something else in there.”

I watch, perhaps more captivated than Charlotte, as Tyler looks inside the box. This time he pulls out a big, pink stuffed rabbit. It’s floppy and looks so soft and perfect.

Tyler hands it to Charlotte and she immediately hugs it to her chest.

When presents are over, we sing happy birthday and then watch Charlotte bite into a small cake just for her. Laughter sounds around the room as she avoids using her hands and just face dives into the pink frosting.

Another cake is cut for the guests, but by the time it’s passed around, Charlotte has had a bath and is passed out in Tyler’s arms.

He looks as content as her. The way he looks down at her with so much love and the way he holds her so protectively. She has no idea how lucky she is, but I’m so glad.

A twinge of sadness works its way in. I feel like I’m already missing so much by not being around. I can’t imagine not being here to watch her grow up. I know that people take jobs, move away, and leave their families every day, but I loved my life here. I miss it.

Scarlett and Leo take a sleepy-looking Callum home, and Nick and Aidan say their goodbyes as well. Hazel, Maverick and Dakota’s little girl, is entertaining us all by dancing in the middle of the living room. She’s got her mom’s red hair but her dad’s personality it seems.

“Center of attention,” Dakota says. “Just like her dad.”

Maverick grins and drapes an arm around his wife’s shoulders.

“I love her hair. You think you can braid mine like that?” I ask Dakota. Hazel’s strawberry-blonde hair is in two braids on either side and the ends are twisted somehow to look like little bows. It’s adorable.

“That’s not me. That’s all Johnny. He’s mastered like twenty different hairstyles, and I can barely find time to brush mine these days.”

“You’re smoking hot.” He kisses her cheek. “Even with unbrushed hair.”

My stomach swoops with the cute scene. So many couples here, all madly in love.

I’m sitting on the couch next to Tyler. Jack leans against the wall across the room. There are places to sit, but I’m glad he keeps his distance.

“How long are you staying?” Piper asks me. I feel all eyes on me. Sometimes I still feel like the teenager they’re all interrogating.

“I’m heading back tonight.”

“Wait. Really?” Tyler turns to me. “I thought you’d at least stay the night.”

I’m not sure if he’s disappointed because he wanted me to stay or if he’s just trying to let me know I have a place to stay if I want. It’s weird now that I don’t live here. I miss my little yellow house. Tyler and Piper rented it out to new students.

“I can’t. I have plans.”

“Ooooh. Big date?” Piper asks.

It might be my imagination, but it seems like Jack tenses at the question.

I am definitely not looking to get blasted about my dating life in front of all these happy couples so I stand. “And that’s my cue to leave.”

Piper stands and I hug her.

“I feel like I barely got to see you,” she whines.

“I know, but it was so good to catch up. Even if just for a few minutes.”

“Are you coming back for the home opener?” Tyler asks.

“I wouldn’t miss it.” I scan the room, waving to everyone as I step to the front door.

Bridget gets up from where she was sitting on Ash’s lap. “I want to walk you out.”

A weird sensation of sadness and relief hits me as we step outside. Bridget links her arm through mine and doesn’t speak until we’re a good ten feet away from the house.

“Well, that was tense.” Her brows lift.

“Really?” I ask. “I couldn’t tell if it was in my head or not.”

“I don’t think anyone else noticed.” She gives me a small smile. “He stared at you the whole time.”

“He’s probably just worried I’ll say something to Ty.”

“Do you really have to go?”

“I don’t want to get in the way of their happy birthday celebrations.”

“You aren’t in the way,” she insists. “But if you feel that way, come stay the night with me and Ash.”

I laugh lightly, trying to imagine that. The few times that Ash and Bridget stayed the night at our place instead of them crashing at his place, I had to wear headphones to bed to drown out the screams and headboard banging against the wall. “It’s okay. Some people from work are going out so maybe I’ll hit up the bars with them.”

She looks at me like she wants to call bullshit. I haven’t felt like going out much since I got to Briar Lake, but maybe it’s time to change that.

I wrap my arms around her neck. “I love you. I’ll see you in a few weeks.”

She’s frowning when I pull away. “I miss you already.”

My heart squeezes. “Me too.”

The front door opens and closes. Both of our attention go to the man stepping out. He has his keys in hand, but when he sees me still standing in the driveway, his steps slow. He eyes me warily as he comes closer.

“Want me to tell him to get lost?” Bridget asks.

I consider it but avoiding him now won’t make him disappear from my life. Even if that’s what I wanted.

“No. It’s okay.”

“All right.” She hugs me again, then raises a brow in what is probably meant to be a warning as she passes by Jack to go back in the house.

He waits until the door closes behind her to speak.

“Do you really have a date or are you avoiding me?” he asks.

I cross my arms over my chest and ignore the question.

“Fine. Don’t answer that. I don’t deserve to know.”

“No, you don’t.”

“I’m sorry about how things ended between us.”

Him being sorry doesn’t really change anything.

“You look good. Happy.”

“I am, so if that’s all.” I angle my body toward my car. I want to flee but in a dignified manner, like he isn’t the reason and it’s just my fabulous plans I’m eager to get to. I have no idea if I pull it off, but he nods.

“I’m glad you’re happy.” He takes a step away and I have to force myself not to call after him or do something really dumb like yell at him. I can be mature and respectful…

“Handsome jerk,” I mutter under my breath. Mature and respectful are both highly overrated.