Fix You (The Playlist BOOK 1)

Song - Say Something by A Great Big World.

I hold myself under the bathwater until my chest burns. I listen to the distorted, waterlogged version of the song on the radio. When I come up for air I hear the door slam downstairs.

I dip my head back under the water. I’m not ready to deal with him yet.

It would have hurt but I wish he would have just told me the truth. He’s not the first wolf to blame me when something bad happens. People don’t understand my “gift.” I asked him to be honest with me and he wasn’t.

There is a feather light tap on the door. When I don’t answer he tries the handle. I didn’t lock it.

He comes in and leans against the sink.

“It was stupid to lie to you but I was afraid. If you told me you hated me, even before we met, it would rip me apart. I should have been honest, I promised you I would be. There’s no excuse for it...whatever I try to justify it with... it was wrong and I was being a coward. Hearing from her hurt you worse than if I had just been honest. You should have heard it from me.”

“Is there anything else? Even the smallest lie...”

“There are none. I know my word means shit right now but...”

“Why does your inner circle seem to dislike me so much?”

He sighs, “they’ve all been with me for years. Julian is three years older than me, he’s known me my whole life. When I decided to pin everything on you... they all jumped on board. I think it was mostly to support me but they’re just skeptical. Laylas been talking a bunch of shit, saying I only changed my mind because of the bond. I didn’t understand your gift before, the burden and responsibility that it is.”

“And you don’t think it’s the bond that made you change your mind?”

“No! After the council meeting it kind of clicked that you don’t have any control over what you know. Then just... your heart... I can feel you Sorsha. I know that you would warn everyone about everything if you could.”

I hate that I’m crying.

“Layla really didn’t mean anything to you? You were prepared to bond yourself to her forever and you expect me to believe she was nothing to you?”

“I know it sounds insane but... yes. That’s the truth. The hickey... she wanted to mark me before I left for the conference and I was so detached from the whole thing that I almost let her. At the last second my wolf flipped out. He hates her but... that was the point...”

I pull myself up from the water and wrap a towel around my body. I don’t miss his sharp inhale or that he tries to hide it because...now is really not the time.

I pull on a robe and let my body sink into our bed.

“Can I sleep here tonight?” He sounds like he’s afraid to ask.

“Yes.”

He climbs into bed with me cautiously, making sure not to touch me.

We sit in the darkness for a few minutes before something cracks in me. My chest heaves and I sob uncontrollably. I cover my face with my hands and weep.

Elijah wraps his arms around me. I don’t have the strength to struggle. I lay in his arms and cry. I let the pain from every hurt I’ve ever felt flow through my tears. He just comforts me, rubbing his hand up and down my back softly.

When I feel like I have cried out all of my trauma I sit up, my hair a crazy mess from laying down on it wet.

“Your wolf is really beautiful,” I sniffle into my hand.

“Thank you,” he whispers softly, like he’s afraid he’ll spook me.

We sit in silence for a few minutes. The heaviness of the day weighing down on us.

“I’m starving,” I pout.

He chuckles, “want a grilled cheese? They’re my specialty.”

I can’t help the stuffy nosed chuckle that comes out.

“I would love one.”

We walk down the dark staircase to the kitchen. He lifts me onto the counter and we both freeze. Something’s wrong.

“Elijah,” I whisper.

He squeezes my thigh, “I feel it.”

He closes his eyes, mind linking others.

Suddenly there is a strange cracking sound from upstairs. We both look toward our room. Someone is in the house.

He pulls me off the counter and pushes me behind him. We both sniff the air. There’s a rogue here.

Beta Julian, Gamma Austin and Cole quietly slip into the front door. I put my finger to my lips and point up to our room.

They nod and break into a formation that they’ve obviously practiced. Austin steps in front of me, to protect me.

“If anything happens to her. I’ll kill you,” Elijah whispers to him.

Elijah and Cole take the lead, shifting and moving up the stairs so quietly I almost don’t believe it happened and I watched them do it!

Julian follows in human form hanging back slightly.

There is a loud snarl, then growling from multiple wolves coming from our room. There is a scuffle and a yelp, then silence.

“Shift,” Elijah yells, his Alpha authority loud and clear.

A few minutes later Cole steps out with a man in strange shackles. I assume they keep him restrained as a human or a wolf. He has a...camera around his neck.

He’s thrashing and snarling but it’s useless, he is caught and seriously outnumbered.

“Why are you here?” Elijah growls.

I actually feel bad for the guy. He looks terrified.

“Another rogue paid me to test out a hole in your defenses.”

“Why are you in my house?”

“I was just supposed to get a picture of you and your Luna. I wasn’t going to hurt you.”

“Who paid you?”

“I swear, I don’t know. I was supposed to test how easily I could get into your land, then take the picture. He’s supposed to meet me to collect the information, then pay me.”

“Meet you when? Where?”

“I don’t know. He said he would find me.”

Elijah growls and rubs his hands through his hair.

“You’re going to go with my Beta and our security team and show us exactly how the fuck you got in here.”

The man nods solemnly, he knows he has no choice.

“Yes, Alpha.”

“Go, handle this then come back to report to me directly.”

“Yes, Alpha,” his men respond before pulling the rogue from the house.

When they close the door he turns to me and pulls me into his chest. He lets out a shaky breath as he holds me tightly.