Fix You (The Playlist BOOK 1)

Song - Love Bites By Def Leopard

I gape at him while he talks to my dad. His wide shoulders and large arms strain against his shirt. He's tall, even for an Alpha. I can see tattoos on his exposed forearms and hands.

"That would be my daughter," I hear my dad say and as if in slow motion, they begin to turn toward me. I want to run, to disappear, for the ground to open up and swallow me whole.

I've waited for this for as long as I can remember and now that it's here I'm terrified.

When his eyes meet mine his whole face tenses. I see his sharp jaw clench, the easy smile that had been on his face as he turned around vanished completely.

"This is my daughter, Sorsha," dad says, oblivious to what's happening in front of him.

A deep, angry growl vibrates through his chest and I sink back into my chair. He doesn't look happy, quite the opposite actually, he looks fucking furious.

"Alpha?" My brother turns to look at him and immediately recognizes what's passing between us.

"Oh, shit."

Yeah, oh, shit.

He never breaks eye contact, his light green eyes drill into me like he's searching my soul.

This doesn't feel like I thought it would. I always hoped that my mate would see me and instantly pull me into his arms.

"Excuse me," his voice is low and gravelly. He turns on his heels and rushes through the crowds of people.

My heart physically aches in my chest.

I stand and run from the room. I don't know where I'm going but I need to go. I run past the crowds of people, and out the door. I run the length of the building to a large garden area. In the center, there is a small gazebo. I sit on the floor, hoping no one can see me.

I sob quietly into my hands. I've been rejected my whole life but this feels different, this feels insurmountable.

I bring my knees to my chest and curl around myself, burying my face.

The Moon Goddess said she had a gift for me. Was this some kind of sick joke? Was my gift to find my mate, only to have him reject me?

The steps creak and I freeze. I know who it is but I don't look up.

"Please, don't cry."

His voice is laced with guilt. I feel him sit down next to me on the floor.

"Please, look at me," his arm rubs against mine.

I reluctantly lift my head but I don't meet his eyes.

"Look, I get it. We can forget that we met and I'll go home with my dad. I don't want someone who doesn't want me."

My heart is splintered in my chest but I won't let him see that. I'll mask it with detached, cold, indifference.

"It's not that I don't want you," he sighs, "it's not you."

"Oh, it's you? Can't think of a less cliche line?" I bite out angrily before pulling myself to stand.

He looks tense, his jade eyes are full of emotion. I have to stay strong, the stupid mate bond is making me want to comfort him.

He rubs his hands over his face and groans.

"It's not you, Sorsha," his raspy voice saying my name makes my knees weak.

"Don't worry about it, Alpha, like I said, we'll go our separate ways."

I bite down on my lip, hard, and jog down the gazebo steps. I won't stand around and beg him. I'm no stranger to not being loved by the people that should love you.

I only make it a few steps when he grabs my arm. His skin against mine should feel like a tingling sensation, this burns, it feels like a horrible reminder of what should be, but isn't. I jerk my arm away and bite down on my lip further, willing my tears away.

"I can't just forget about you. That's not what I want."

I don't speak. I don't have anything to say.

"Sorsha!" James' voice cuts through the painful quiet passing between us.

I turn to see him jogging toward us, "we need you in here, it's starting," he looks between us sympathetically. He looks like he almost cares.

I turn without a word or a glance and follow my brother. I feel him behind me, walking closely.

When we rejoin the conference everyone is seated except for a few men in the front of the room. Much to my frustration Elijah is seated directly across from me. I won't meet his gaze, no matter what, no matter how the bond tries to manipulate me.

"Thank you all for coming," Alpha Rhys, the angry phone alpha, speaks.

I try to listen but my mind is reeling. My mate is here. I won't let myself look at him so I picture his face in my mind. I understand why the she-wolves were so taken by him. His face is strong and handsome. Definitely easy to look at. His features are near perfect. I think about his body, muscular and tall, his arms look like they could lift me easily. I can almost feel what it would be like to be wrapped up in them.

"Alpha Elijah, we are all happy to hear that your pack escaped unharmed and with no casualties from the rogue attack."

This draws my attention. Elijah is staring at me, his eyes glued to my face. I turn toward the speaker and straighten my shoulders.

I.will.not.look.

I try to focus, I know he will be bringing up the Goddess' message soon.

"Alpha James, will your daughter speak?"

I force myself not to roll my eyes. I'm sitting right here...

"Yes, ask what you will."

"Will you tell us exactly what the Moon Goddess said, please?"

I hold my head up and let my wolf come forward so that my voice doesn't shake.

"Warn the council that they must prepare, something is coming. I asked for clarification but it was not given."

There is an outbreak of whispering throughout the room.

"Ask her again!" Someone shouts out and I can't hold back a loud sigh.

"Next time she summons me I will ask her. I can't go to her, she brings me there when she wills it. She only shares what she wants to share. She gives me a single detail of a hundred and it has to be deciphered."

After another hour of back and forth, people talking and shouting and making plans, we adjourned for the day.

I stand quickly and rush past my father and brother. Elijah stands but he isn't able to get past the crowd that gathers around him.