Finding Fae

The next thing I knew, it was the middle of the night. I was curled up around a pillow on my cot, staring at the wall across from me with my blanket pulled over my head so the only thing visible was my nose and eyes.

My body felt like a noodle, my mind felt like one giant bruise, which I didn’t even know was possible, and I really wanted to dig a hole in the overgrown backyard, crawl inside, and never come out. But, first, I was hungry.

I gathered the little bit of will power I had left and slowly sat up. Tugging the blanket with me, I shuffled out of my room and down the stairs. Whispered voices told me there was more than one person here, which should have been a warning for me to take my butt back upstairs, but it’s like it didn’t compute.

Wrapping the blanket higher up my shoulders and tightening the makeshift hood over my head, I walked into the kitchen, where the whispering was and looked around. Zane, Blaine, Nando, Ben, the twins’ father, Kent, and Malachi were all there, making the already small space feel cramped. All sound stopped and every eye was on me as I grabbed the half empty ice cream container, the chocolate syrup, the jar of cherries, a spoon, a can of nuts, and left.

Not a word was said, not a sounds was made. Pay no heed to the girl beneath the blanket. I was making my sundae in the ice cream container on the couch in the living room when Nando came in with Malachi trailing behind, looking like a scolded child.

“Crushed nuts are better,” Malachi said when I opened the tin. I glared at him as I dumped the handful that was left on the table and proceeded to slam the can down until the nuts were in bits. “Fair enough.”

“I think it’s best if you don’t say anything,” Nando said quietly to Malachi.

“I think you might be right,” he nodded.

“Will you talk to me, Fae?” Nando said coming to sit on the couch next to me.

“About what?” I said around nuts and a cherry.

“Anything, at this point,” he tilted his head to the side a bit.

“Can we discuss the insanity that’s happened since I made the stupid choice to sneak out of my house Saturday night? Or the fact that everything before then was a lie? Or are we going with how the only parental figure, which happens to be part of my abduction when I was an infant, has completely ditched me? Or should we go with the awesome and mysterious “they” that have been supposedly chasing me and Gary that, now that I’ve made that damn Call, are closing in?” I said as I tried to scoop a particularly large cherry from the bottom of the jar. “There’s others, if you want. I’m completely unprepared for whatever is coming, not to mention the fact I’ll probably die a painful and terribly messy death on my eighteenth birthday. To name a few.”

“Wow, the pity party is real right now,” Malachi scoffed and I glared at him as Nando slapped his hand to his forehead. “You’re being pathetic.”

Once again, I was up and taking swings at him. I didn’t think about it, I just did it. It was like my body told my brain to screw off and went rogue. Once again, he blocked or dodged every move I made, only this time, he wasn’t just being defensive. He threw a few punches himself, which only served to make me angrier as I avoided them.

It was like I came to a ledge and just took a running leap right off the thing. No parachute, or flight suit or anything. I just dove into the open air and then decided that it was too scary as I fell.

Malachi and I fought, swinging and dodging until I couldn’t see because the world had become watery. I screamed and made a last ditch effort to tackle him, charging at him like a linebacker. I caught him, but once we hit the floor, I found myself pinned down with him sitting on my hips, his feet holding my thighs down, and pinned my hands next to my head, completely immobilizing me.

“Enough with feeling sorry for yourself, Fae,” he said, hovering over me. “Since you got here, I have seen you take hit after hit and not once did you break. Stop with the self pity and get your shit together. If you don’t want to be a weak and pitiful victim, then you need to change it.”

I struggled, of course. It’s natural to want to when you’re trapped. It made that burning in my chest grow until it just... broke. The water that had swallowed the world started falling down my face and a choked sob made it’s way out of me.

Malachi moved off me, but didn’t let me go. Instead, he put his legs out and pulled me to him so I was, more or less, crying on his shoulder. It was like popping a zit. It hurt like hell and some nasty crap came out, but it felt better afterwards. It took a little while, but the pain stopped and the tears dried, leaving me tired and feeling thin, like too little butter on too much bread.

“Better?” Malachi whispered when I sat up.

I nodded, too drained to form coherent words. He wiped my wet cheeks and gave me a small smile.

“Good. You need to get some rest. You look like hell,” he said and I gave him a blank look, making him laugh. “You do, though.”

“I got it from here,” Kent said as he bent down and scooped me up, like I was a kid. “Someone grab her blanket.”

I was carried up the stairs and back to my room where Kent put me back on the cot.

“I don’t think I’ve heard of two Bonded fighting like that before,” he smiled as Zane covered me with the blanket.

“He could have hurt her, Dad,” he grumbled.

“It’s not that easy for Bonded to hurt one another, son,” Kent said, putting his hand on his shoulder. “Come on. Let her rest.”

They left and I closed my eyes, finally feeling a little bit more like myself. Like I had some control back in my life. It felt pretty good, actually.

I was basking when I heard my door click open quietly.

“I swear, he’s like a damn watch dog out there,” Malachi muttered quietly as he crept in and closed the door behind himself. “You still awake?”

“Not for long,” I yawned.

“I can’t leave,” he said and I felt him sit on the end of my cot. “Holy hell, Fae. You actually sleep on this thing?”

“It’s this or the unknown origins of the bed in Gary’s room,” I rolled my eyes.

“No wonder you never look like you sleep,” he shook his head.

The room got quiet for a while before I sighed and rolled over to look at him. He looked... different. Not physically, of course. He still looked like a gift from the gods, but his eyes were different. Still green, still deep as never ending pools, but not quite as soul sucking as before. There was a softer look about him now, almost like he was letting his guard down a little bit.

“Thanks, by the way,” I said and he looked at me with a half smirk that would melt any girls undies.

“You needed to let it out,” he said. “I think we need to work on a better way to deal with this than that, though.”

“Yeah, my coping is running away,” I shook my head. “It’s not like I had the opportunity to develop a whole lot of hobbies.”

“No, I guess not, but you have plenty of time now,” he said.

“Only until April,” I scoffed.

“Oh, you think you’re going to just roll over and, poof, be done?” he quirked his eyebrow and gave me a smug, slightly evil, smirk. “You have no idea. You forget, I’m just as connected to you as those four push overs are. The only difference is that I can handle the dirty parts. You’re getting ready for that Awakening, princess, even if I have to kick your ass to do it.”

The next morning, I went to Nando’s as planned. Malachi had stayed at the house the whole night, much to Zane’s disapproval, and had agreed that it might be a good idea to have Nando’s relative do a reading to see if there was anything hiding in my memories that could help solve the mystery of who, or even what, I am. Apparently, it would shed some light on what I could expect during my Awakening.

I woke up felling pretty freaking amazing, actually. I smiled easier, without having to force it, I laughed a little quicker, and, instead of seeing Malachi and Zane’s bickering as annoying, it was actually kind of entertaining. I was, for once in a long time, optimistic.

Of course, my problems were still major freaking concerns, but Malachi was right. I had the power to change it and moping around wasn’t the way to do it. I had to stop being such a sissy and find the parts of me that could, and would, kick anyone’s ass for saying that.

Arriving at Nando’s house, I was tempted to start reciting “The Old Lady Who Lived in a Shoe”. It was a big enough house, but there was a steady stream of kids of various ages, that came pouring out of the door and heading off to school. Zane walked with me, waving and exchanging rushed greetings from a few of the kids until we got inside.

I was wholly impressed with the inside. At first glance, it was a mess of clutter. Random shoes, books, homework, piles of laundry, knickknacks, and dishes were scattered allover the place. But, looking closer, the shoes were soon claimed as more kids got ready to leave for the day, books and homework were passed around until they found the right person, the laundry was clean and neatly folded, waiting to be put away, and the dishes were freshly dirtied from breakfast and were soon taken to the kitchen. It was chaos, for certain, but organized and functioning, controlled to be effective and, dare I say, efficient.

“Nana!” Zane called out with a huge smile as we entered the kitchen.

“You’re early, pup,” an older woman grinned back as he dried her hands off on her apron and came over to pull him into a hug and cup his cheeks.

She was short and slightly rounded, but in a jolly kind of way. I mean, after having as many kids as she did, your figure doesn’t exactly hang around. And I knew, without a doubt that she was Nando’s mother because she looked nearly the same as he did, only a little more delicate in the face area.

“This must be Fae,” she smiled at me as her hands kept squishing Zane’s face like a cartoon, making his shoulder shake slightly with quiet laughter. “I’m Maria. You must be so confused. Not to worry, my third cousin’s wife Gloria will get you all sorted out, but she won’t be here for another half hour. Why don’t you sit down and I’ll get you something to eat for breakfast.”

She patted Zane’s face then shooed him away as she steered me to the kitchen table where three highchairs were sitting, complete with messy, pudgy occupants that cooed and smiled as they painted with their mashed breakfast.

A huge plate of food was sat in front of me before Maria started cleaning up the little ones and handing them off to which ever one of her kids happened to be walking by at the time.

“Morning, darling,” a man said with a huge smile on his face as he came down the stairs and gave Maria a kiss on the cheek. “I’m still getting the tykes from daycare today, right?”

“That’s right,” Maria giggled as her husband attacked her neck with more kisses. “Matthew, behave yourself. We have a guest.”

“This must be Fae,” Matthew grinned widely. “Nando’s Bonded?”

“That’s me,” I smiled.

“Matthew, the step-father,” he smiled and shook my hand.

“The step father that’s going to be late,” Maria said, handing him a travel mug of coffee, a bagel, and a bagged lunch. “Take Sandra over to Courtney’s on the way.”

A quick kiss on the lips and Matthew was off, leaving me and Maria in a less noisy house. It was still noisy, of course, but with most of the kids gone off to school or to work, if they were old enough, the noise was less than jet engine levels.

“Nando has been talking about you nonstop since you moved here,” Maria smiled as she went back to cleaning the dishes. “He’s been so worried about how you’re taking things. I can’t even imagine what you’re dealing with right now.”

“It’s been rough,” I nodded.

I ate as she talked. Man, that woman could chat, too. I didn’t even notice when she took my plate and got it cleaned off.

“Goodness, it was harder getting here than I thought it was going to be,” another woman said as she bustled in and sat a giant bag down on the table. “You must be Fae.”

“As far as I know,” I smiled. “You must be Gloria.”

She looked every bit of eccentric. Bright clothes, bright nails that were far too long to be practical, beaded necklaces and enough bangles on her wrists to cover from her elbow down.

“Let’s get started, shall we? It can take several hours, so the sooner the better,” she said opening her bag and pulling out a small bag of herbs. “Maria, if you would, I’ll go ahead and get her to...?”

“Matthew’s home office would be the quietest,” Maria said, taking the bag and setting a kettle on the stove. “I’ll bring this up when it’s ready. Steep five minutes, right?”

“Since we’re going deep, make it ten,” Gloria said, taking my elbow and guiding me up the stairs.

We got to the office and she had me strip to my bra and undies, meaning she tutted when I hesitated and started pulling my clothes off me herself. She had me sit on a couch as she checked my nails on both hands and feet, which was weird, but she said built up dirt could cause a problem. Thankfully, I have this peeve about personal hygiene.

I was laid back on the couch and instructed not to wiggle as she started drawing symbols and runes on my skin with a mud made from charcoal. The tea came and I was told to drink every drop of the foul swampy tasting liquid.

“Now, we wait for a while,” Gloria said. “It shouldn’t take too long to take effect and we’ll start off easy, with the most recent memories. Try not to fight my direction or it’ll take a lot longer.”

As soon as she finished speaking, she lit a bundle of herbs and waved the smoke over my body as I started to feel light and dizzy, like I wasn’t really in my body anymore. I tried to move, but couldn’t.

“It’s okay, dear. It’s to keep you from reenacting violent memories,” Gloria patted my arm. “You can speak, sort of, but try not to move. Now, let’s start with last week.”