Feral For Her Freedom

Whips were the worst of his instruments of pain. I could not see when it would strike, or which one he’d chose. I hated the way the barbed whips would dig into my flesh and then pull out long strips of skin as it was retracted and the pain that was inflicted as the whip tore at my open wounds and raw skin. Then he would leave me hanging there, half alive to feel the cool air nip at my wounds and seep into my bones.

Each day we revisited Myrin’s lesson in obedience, and he always found something else to ‘teach’ me. I didn’t know how long I’d been here, and worse, how much longer I’d remain here. I didn’t want to keep living, although this life of emptiness and pain hardly qualified as living. Myrin was getting in my head, trying to make me convince myself to just give in.

I wanted to.

But each moment I’d nearly break, something within me would reinforce my promise to myself.

Not yet. I continued to remind myself.

Now wasn’t the time to give in, just a little longer.

So, I forced myself to live, even when death seemed so close, so appealing. I refused to let Myrin win. As the days continued on, he grew increasingly frustrated, enraged he made no progress with me.

“If you want to eat you will conform!” he spat at me as I hung from the ceiling, my back a bloody slab of meat after his most recent beating.

A gurgling sound that was a dry laugh spilled from my lips as well as a mouth full of blood. I raised my head, my hair hanging limply in stringy strands crusted with blood. “You won’t let me die,” I called his bluff, “your ego can’t handle it knowing I won out in the end.”

His face contorted in rage and he backhanded me across the face.

I groaned and spat out a tooth, the blood hanging from my mouth in sticky strands. He cursed at me, telling me all the horrible things he had planned, but I couldn’t find it in me to care. Pain was just a normal feeling for me now, like the way my chest expanded as I breathed.

He’d used every device in this room, nothing was new, I’d lived through all of them and I knew I could continue to do so.

What I didn’t know was he had saved the worst of his methods for this moment. It was like he’d heard my thoughts and in that second, he finally realized that I wouldn’t break under physical pain or under his mental manipulation.

He would have to do something to break my very soul, my entire being, not just my body and mind if he wanted to win.

I had grown through this, come to learn myself better than any person ever could. I had lost the meaning of life, my purpose, but I knew my reason to keep living.

My brash actions and foolish courage had been replaced with a stone heart and a steel mind. I told myself if I could live through this, I could live through anything. My sarcasm was replaced by the stinging truth. I could get into Myrin’s head as easily as he could sort through mine. My fearlessness of death was replaced by my tolerance of pain. My strong heart and rebellious ways were replaced with an unbreakable soul.

But even with all these changes, with the preparation I had instilled within myself for the worst, I was not prepared for what was to come.

I thrashed and screamed as Myrin climbed up on the table I was now strapped to, the open wounds on my back sticking to the cold metal beneath me. His touch was the most vile feeling I’d ever felt as he gripped my skin, marring it with his sharp claws. They pierced the inside of my thighs, digging into my flesh, the blood coating my skin and pooling around his fingers.

His weight was crushing above my emaciated and bony frame, I was trapped completely under him, my legs already parted and shackled open on the table. I met him with no resistance, my body too weak to even squirm and could only screech as he did what he pleased with me, hot tears of utter hate flooding down my cheeks.

It was the worst kind of pain as he tore through me, knowing my own body wasn’t even my own anymore. He forced himself inside me, showing no mercy even as I could feel my muscles rip open, blood acting as the only lubricant.

I cursed him aloud and then continued to do so silently when my lungs gave out, feeling myself cracking as he violated me in the worst way possible.

Then there was warmth flooding through me for the first time in what felt like years, and yet instead of it being the long-awaited feeling of my dreams it was the worst feeling in the world as he spilled his seed in me.

That was not the end.

On and on it went, Myrin trying to steal my soul along with my body, coating me inside and out with his disgusting semen. Those green eyes burned wildly above me, sparking with something akin to wild glee.

He looked crazed.

Feral.

I closed my eyes because I couldn’t keep staring at the devil.

I couldn’t keep consciousness anymore.

I had to leave this place. Leave this dungeon, this body, this world.

I had to escape him but the One refused to let me.

He licked at my tears, knowing how much he disgusted me and whispered lowly in my ear. “You’ve pushed me to this point, Beastie. This is your fault. You get to decide when this stops. When you decided to behave, this all goes away.” He inhaled my scent, his hands roaming around my body, settling on my stomach. “Until then, you shall never have any offspring that will grow in your vile body. You’ve lost that privilege,” he hissed against my skin and sank his claws into my abdomen, proceeding to rip out my womb.

He sliced away the stringy pieces that kept my womb attached to my body and threw it on the ground with a wet sound. I vomited up my stomach acid and blood, no food or water was left in me thanks to his starvation methods.

Myrin tucked my hair behind my ear, not at all bothered by the vomit still clinging to it. “I’ll leave you to understand your new situation,” he murmured, giving me a cruel smile.

Climbing off of me, he turned to the table and grabbed the syringe he had prepared at the beginning. He injected me with the shot of adrenaline like always in order to speed up my healing process so he could be assured I wouldn’t die and left me to slowly destruct from the inside.