SWNOVELS Chapter CHAPTER 20
ANITA'S POV
Going to my room and being by myself was going to do more harm than good therefore I decided to go and face him. I wanted to know where he stood afterall. All this back and forth was not really helping us. I was getting hurt yet I was not even sure if he truly loves me and if loving him would be worth it for me in the end.
I sat there waiting and knowing that he was going to smell my scent and come to me. Both of us have been avoiding having a conversation and it is actually high time that the two of us talked.
This was actually the last time that I am giving him a chance for him to tell me what he truly feels about me. If he ends up rejecting me then I guess I will have to take another step. He would have proven that clearly he didn't want anything to do with me.
I didn't sit for long before I felt his footsteps coming towards my direction.. My heart thudded so heavily in my chest and I started breathing faster. I was anxious, I didn't know how to sit calmly when I was with him because he had always made it a habit of snapping at me.
Low key I was afraid of him. I don't know what I was thinking, trying to get him to love him yet he had never been gentle with my heart. He has always broken my heart every chance that he gets.
"Hi," He said before sitting next to me.
"Hi Alpha Robin," I said, barely looking at him.
Of course I was charmed by him... His cologne made me yearn to hug him tight so that I could smell him all day. But, I had to be honest with myself. We needed to have this conversation if we don't then I would pretty much be walking in circles yet that is barely my intention. I want to figure it out today.
"I know that you come to see me," I revealed.
"I don't know what youre talking about," He was so quick to counter and I could feel my heart become heavy. Why do I normally make myself go through all this? This guy had made it clear that he wanted nothing to do with me yet I am here, trying to convince him that I am the perfect woman for him.
"Can you please be honest with me for once? I know you come looking for me. What is it that you wanted to say to me?" I asked, trying my best to control my emotions. I did not want things to get heated because this would turn out to be something ugly. I had hidden so much hurt that he caused in my heart and if I let it out, he would not like this other side of me.
"I did not come looking for you, I mean, why would I look for someone like you?" He asked and I could feel my heart miss a mighty beat. Immediately, tears formed on my eyes and I started biting my lower lip so hard to prevent them from falling down.
"What is that supposed to mean huh?" I asked, I felt so defeated. I couldn't believe that he could say something like that to me. I thought that he liked me, I thought that he felt that I was beautiful and special too but as it turns out, it was all in my head.
This arrogant, cold Alpha did not care about me. He only cared for himself and his ego.
"I don't know what you have been smoking to make you think that I would want to be with you. I can't love you. Plus, I can't be with someone in this pack. I roll solo and you have to respect that," He said and suddenly all the pain that I was feeling became anger.
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How dare he lie on my face. He was screwing Lola behind my back. Why was he lying to me like this. He might have rejected me but that does not give him permission to lie to me as if I am a fool. "You think I am stupid, huh?" I asked. I was literally breathing fire.
"I am so sorry but I don't know what you are talking about," He chuckled.
"I know you did it, I know you fuck Lola when you want. You come here and lie to me that you ride solo yet you allow Lola to ride you," I said getting off my seat. I was fighting the urge to fight him because I knew that it would be a losing battle. He can beat me to death, especially now that I have exposed his secret with Lola. He is the strongest man in the region and I cannot take my chances.
"What did you just say? Do you know the repercussions of what you have said, huh? What if someone hears you say such a thing?" He asked.
"I am sure about what I am saying. If you reject me, at least be honest about it. Don't lie to me you haven't dated anyone yet Lola is the bitch you have been fucking over and over again!" I shouted as I started staggering away. Tears were in my eyes, I was in so much pain, I wanted it all gone.
I didn't sign up for this when I chose to love him. I signed up for love, not anger, resentment and pain.
He ran behind me and grabbed my hand, pulling me close and forcing me to look at him.
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He was breathing so heavily, shaking in rage even. His pupils were dilating in his eyes, I had never seen him so angry before.
Repeat what you have just said!" He demanded, not loosening the grip and I felt pain. He was holding me way too tightly. "Let me go, go and be with Lola. You love her, don't you," I said, trying to free myself but he didn't let go of me just yet. "What is wrong with you?" He asked.
"Let me go Alpha Robin, I am done with this," I said and started crying. His grip was hurting me. After seeing that I was hurting, he finally let me go. He had looked into my eyes, trying to figure me out but he was not able to. "What do you want?" He asked, his tone was calmer.
"I want you to be with Lola because she is the woman you want to fuck with," I revealed, crying even more.
"Stop crying, okay, come, let's talk," He suggested, catching me by surprise.