Eros: Chapter 2
“Lani,” Dad’s voice boomed from my laptop speakers.
I jolted in my chair. “Sorry, Da. Sorry.”
We were on our weekly Skype video chat due to him living in Colorado. Usually, it’d be an hour-long conversation catching each other up on our lives. My silence alerted him something was up.
“What’s the matter with you, lass? You’d be talking my ear off by now about all the couples you helped this week.”
I dragged a hand over my face, catching a finger on my lip. “That’s precisely the problem.”
Dad stared at me disapprovingly through his webcam. I concentrated on the deep grooves in his cheeks—wrinkles that’d sprouted within the past five years. Chelsea had his emerald-colored eyes, but I inherited the chocolate-colored hair with tints of auburn. His had since gone gray, but it suited him. Made him look extra distinguished even though he was the most easy-going man I knew.
“For the first time since I started E-romantic, I had a client find someone on their own in less than twenty-four hours.” It sounded crazier saying it out loud.
He rubbed the stubble on his chin. “In a day? Right after signing up with you?”
“Uh-huh. They went to some bar afterward, and the bartender introduced her to the supposed love of her life.”
He blinked. “The bartender.”
“My reaction exactly. And seriously, who finds the love of their life in a day? Except for Disney princesses.” I rolled my eyes.
“Your mum and me.”
My heart sank. “Da, you got divorced.” It always stung bringing up mom. Not only did I have to witness the death of true love as a kid, but then we lost her two years ago in a boating accident.
“Aye, that’s true. But if we would’ve met at a different time, under different circumstances, perhaps things would’ve gone differently.”
I stuck my bottom lip out. “Whose side are you on here, old man?”
“Lani.” He leaned forward, filling the screen with his face, and slipped his wire-rimmed glasses from his nose. “You know I hate seeing ye like this. You can’t use what happened to your mum and me as an excuse for the rest of your life.”
I picked at the Intel label next to the keypad of my laptop. “It’s not an excuse. It’s reality.”
My phone buzzed on my desktop, making a loud rattle as it bounced. I narrowed my eyes at the notification of a new e-mail.
Dear Miss Stewart,
I will no longer need your services to find a partner. As luck would have it, I found the man of my dreams in a bar. Crazy, right? I appreciate everything you’ve done for me these past few months and hope there aren’t any hard feelings.
Sincerely,
Nicholas
“You’ve got to be shitting me.” I dropped my phone, thankful for my thick carpets.
“What’s goin’ on?” Dad squinted at the camera.
It couldn’t have been the same bar, right?
“Da, I’ve got to go. I just got yet another e-mail from a client canceling my services. I’ve got to stop this or risk losing half of my clientele by the end of the week.”
“You’re gonna confront them, aren’t ye?” His bushy eyebrows furrowed.
I leaped up and grabbed my purse. After tripping over my phone, I grabbed it and threw it in my bag. “Something like that.”
“Dinna lose yer heid, Lani girl.” Dad’s tone dropped an octave.
I forced a smile. “I’m calm. I’m fine. Everything is just fine.” Hovering my finger over the end call button, I waited.
Dad chuckled. “Love ye.”
“Me too.”
As soon as his face disappeared, my fake smile morphed into a scowl.
This bartender didn’t know who they were messing with.
I breezed into the office, giving quick waves to any employees greeting me. Once I reached Alex’s desk, I jutted my thumb behind me. “I need you to come with me to a bar.”
Her thin eyebrows rose, and a corner of her lips quirked. “Happy Hour in the middle of the workday? Now we’re talking.” She maniacally grinned at me as she locked her computer and grabbed her jacket. “Which bar?”
“The Arrow.” I laced my words with a dash of venom.
“Huh. This may surprise you, but I haven’t been to that one.”
I stopped at the doorway. “That does surprise me.”
“Right?”
We made our way outside, and I crossed my arms in a huff when we waited at the crosswalk. “Some bartender at this place is stealing my clients.”
“Ah. I knew there was an ulterior motive. You never drink in the middle of the day, despite my best efforts.”
“Two clients, Alex.” I held two fingers up and poked her in the shoulder with them. “Two have inexplicably found ‘love’ in the past two days thanks to this bartender.”
She glared at the spot I’d poked and dusted her jacket. “Isn’t that the whole point of our business? To help people find a compatible partner?”
The walk sign illuminated.
“Yes, but that’s supposed to be my job. The algorithm’s job. Not some whacko bartender who’s giving random advice.”
My stroll turned into a power walk once we reached the other side of the street. I paused, realizing Alex wasn’t beside me.
“What are you doing?” I motioned with my hand for her to hurry up.
“Calm down. The bar nor the tender are going anywhere.” She caught up with me and cocked her head to one side. “Why am I coming with you again?”
“You’re my backup.” I started power walking again, took a deep breath, and forced myself to slow down.
“Backup? You make it sound like a breach job.”
The blazing red neon sign hissed at me. I glared at the arrow flying from one side to the other, landing in a target—The Arrow.
“Oh, it’s a high-stakes job, Alex. Remember, fewer clients mean less on your paycheck too.”
The skin below her eyes wrinkled. “Valid point.” She pushed her jacket sleeves up. “Let’s fry the bastard. Wait. Is it a guy or a woman?”
“Does it matter?”
People laughed within the bar, a group of men yelled at the hockey game on one of seven TVs, glasses clanked, and light music played in the background. Various hockey insignia hung on the walls. There were tables on the center floor every few feet and a large mahogany bar at the back.
“Elani,” Alex whispered, turning my body to face the bar. “Please tell me that’s the bartender.”
At first, I rolled my eyes, but a lump formed in my throat once I caught sight of him. A tall man with hair the color of a Hershey’s kiss twirled bottles in his palms. He smiled at a group of women huddled on one side, ogling him, curling their hair with their fingers. The blue and green plaid shirt clung to his chest, hinting at his muscular physique. His gaze lifted, tracing on me. I yelped and jumped behind Alex, grabbing her jacket.
“What are you doing?” Alex cocked an eyebrow at me over her shoulder.
“He saw me.”
“Isn’t that the point? He kind of has to see you for you to rip him a new asshole, right?”
I lowered my head and peered around her elbow. The bartender poured the pink liquid into four martini glasses with a sparkling grin. He dusted his hands off and slung a towel over his shoulder, leaning onto the bar with one elbow. One of the women took the toothpick with sliced fruit from her drink and picked a piece of pineapple off with her teeth.
“We don’t know that he’s the Client Thief. It’s a bar. There has to be more than one bartender.” I squinted one eye, scanning the area for additional workers, but aside from the two cocktail waitresses and some guy loading the kegs, he was it.
“Are you kidding? That guy looks like he could lay more pipe than a plumber.”
I tugged on her jacket. “Which has nothing to do with finding the supposed love of your life.”
Alex snorted. “Maybe to you.”
“Screw it. I’m going in.” I stood, tossed my hair back, and pulled on the hem of my shirt.
Alex was already halfway to the bar. I widened my eyes and scampered after her.
“Hi. I’m going to cut straight to the chase, slick. Do you like to play matchmaker on the side?” Alex asked the bartender, folding her hands on the bar top.
The bartender’s brows pinched together, and he chuckled—deep and slightly raspy. “I’m sorry?”
I shoved past Alex, forcing her onto a stool. The bartender’s gaze met mine, sending a quiver through my stomach. His eyes were like a peacock—the blue part. A wavy piece of hair hung down over his forehead like Clark Kent, and when I glanced below his lips, I had to grab the bar to keep from stumbling backward. He had it—the cleft chin.
“I uh—” I couldn’t stop staring at it. Cleft chins were one of my weaknesses. And his was perfect. Prominent but not to the point of collecting water. “She uh—was talking for me.”
I could feel Alex staring at the side of my face and elbowed her. She batted my arm away.
“Oh, yeah? Care to explain?” The bartender asked as he leaned forward.
A light scattering of chest hair peeked from the two undone buttons of his plaid shirt. His firm forearm muscles flexed as he gripped the edge of the mahogany.
I thinned my lips and folded my hands in front of me. “I run this dating website. You might’ve heard of it, E-romantic?”
He shook his head. “Nope.”
“You haven’t?”
Alex thwacked my stomach to continue.
“Anyway, two of my clients dropped from my program because they came to this bar and said you led them to love.” I poked the bar top twice.
“Well, that’s great to hear.”
“So, it’s true?”
“Absolutely.”
I could feel my heartbeat in my ears. “It’s not great. You’re stealing business from me.”
Alex remained silent, resting her chin in her hand.
“How’s it stealing if I’m getting no kind of monetary compensation for it?” He raised a brow.
I opened my mouth to respond and then snapped it shut. He was right.
“Why don’t you tell me more about this site of yours? The first round is on the house.”
“I’ll have a wine spritzer.” Alex’s eyelids grew heavy.
I had no intention of having a civil conversation with him, and now Alex sealed us into a round of drinks.
“I’ll have whatever. And no Sex on the Beach.” I glared at him. He seemed the type to use that drink as a flirtation device.
He bit his lip. “I much prefer it in other places. Too much sand.”
One of Alex’s hands gripped my knee from under the concealment of the bar.
“Name’s Eric, by the way.”
Alex nudged her head at me. “Elani. Alex.”
“Pleasure to meet you ladies. I’ll be right back.” He scanned my face before walking away.
“Oh. My. Zeus.” Alex’s grip tightened on my leg.
“What’s the matter with you?”
“Are you kidding? You’re a total goner. He has the chin, Lani.”
I grabbed a cocktail napkin and started folding it. “I’d like to think a chin won’t make me throw all scruples out the window. Besides, this guy is my competition, remember?”
“Right. Right. It makes for some of the best sex anyway.”
Eric swayed a shaker in his hand—a wide masculine hand.
“Is that all you think about?”
“No. I also think about storm clouds, how many different ways to kill rodents, and muscular naked man ass.”
“How in the world did we become best friends?”
She stared at me deadpan. “My electric personality.”
“Here we are. One wine spritzer and—” He set a glass with a bright blue liquid in front of me, placing a lemon slice on the rim. “Sex in the Driveway.”
“Ha. Ha. Clever.” I slid the glass toward me, trying to ignore the way the drink made his blue eyes pop.
“I thought so.” He did one quick bob with his brows.
Alex slurped on her drink, glancing between the two of us.
“So, you run a dating service. How does it work exactly?” He wiped droplets from the bar with a towel.
“They answer a questionnaire, and based on the answers, I’ve built a database with an algorithm that’ll match them to the most likely candidate.” I slipped the straw into my mouth, taking the first sip—sweet, peachy, and orangey.
“Candidate for love?”
“No. Compatibility.”
He snapped his attention to Alex, who shrugged. “Please tell me she isn’t one of those types who thinks love is all scientific bullshit?”
Alex sulked as her eyes roamed everywhere but him.
Eric’s gaze returned to me. “You are. Oh, that’s rich.”
“It’s not bullshit.” I sat straighter. “My system is guaranteed to find them a partner for life, not just some euphoric feeling that’s bound to end in heartbreak.”
He folded his arms, accentuating his already wide frame. “Wow. The world’s certainly done a number on you, eh?”
“What would you know about love anyway? I don’t see a ring on your finger.”
Alex slid off her stool, crouching and sidestepping toward the bathrooms.
Eric brought our faces closer. “And you’re presumptuous. I don’t see one on you either. Have you not used your algorithm on yourself?”
I frowned. “Of course not.”
He pushed back and held his arms out at his sides. “Do you not trust your creation to find you this supposed compatible partner?”
“I prefer to do it the old-fashioned way. The system is there for those that want to use it.”
He snapped his fingers. “I’ll tell you what. Let’s make a deal.”
My heart raced.
“You run the algorithm on yourself. You have three months to find Mr. Right. If you do, I won’t play matchmaker anymore.”
I eyed him. “Intriguing, but what if I lose?”
A wicked grin tugged at his lips. “You let me edit your code.”
I didn’t want his grubby, albeit attractive man-hands meddling with my algorithm. “No way. Those fingers aren’t going anywhere near my code.”
“You seem pretty confident in your system, so what are you afraid of?”
Fury shot down my spine. “Fine. But when I win, you stop with the matchmaking. Not here, not from some donut shop. It stops.”
“Do we have a deal then?” He extended his hand.
I stared at his palm as if scorpions crawled over it before slipping my hand into his. As our skin touched, butterflies beat at my stomach, sending a tingle down my legs. We narrowed our eyes at each other, and I snapped my hand back, clutching it to my chest.
“Do you…want another?” He pointed at my empty glass, and I continued to stare at him, absently nodding.
He rubbed his chin as he walked off to make the drink.
Alex flopped onto the stool next to me, whisking her spritzer into her hand. “You two bone yet?”
I didn’t look at her, opting to glare at Eric’s back instead. “We made a deal.”
She choked and sputtered and ran her sleeve across her mouth. “I go to the bathroom and come back to you playing Hades? Making deals?”
Alex’s Greek roots ran deep. The random drops and references to myths and gods didn’t even faze me anymore.
“If I win, he won’t play matchmaker anymore.” I finally tore my gaze away from him.
She chugged down the rest of her drink. “Lovely, but what do you have to do?”
“Use my algorithm on me.”
“Lani.”
“I know, but I should have enough confidence in my system to trust it on myself.”
“If you say so.”
“I have three months to find him. I can do this.” I splayed my hands on the bar, feeling short of breath. “Right?”
My breathing grew shallow. The straw fell out of Alex’s mouth, and she frantically fanned my face.
“What happens if you don’t?” Alex thinned her lips.
I cinched my brow as I looked at her. She’d helped me build this business. And here I went putting it on the line over some petty form of competition. My stomach gurgled.
“Lani?” She narrowed her eyes.
I leaned away, whimpering.
“Here we are. More Sex in the Driveway.” Eric set the drink in front of me.
I slurped it so fast it gave me brain-freeze. Palming my forehead, I made a gah sound.
“Wow. Little antsy?” Eric asked.
Alex smacked her hand on the bar. “Let’s see you in action.”
“I could take that request in many ways.” Eric smiled at her with a hooded gaze.
“As much as I appreciate your gutter mind—” Alex pulled on the collar of her shirt. “I’m referring to your supposed matchmaking skills. Elani told me about the bet. And I don’t care if you did a blood bonding shake. I want to make sure you can do what you claim.”
“You have a loyal friend here,” Eric said to me, tapping his knuckle against the bar.
A lump formed in my throat. I did. I really did. All the more reason, I was the scum of the Earth.
Eric scanned the room, narrowing his eyes with each inch he took in. “Alright. Observe.”
He walked to the main floor, rubbing his hands together as he approached a blonde woman sitting by herself.
“Oh. He’s actually going to do it. He’s serious?” We both turned in our stools to watch.
Eric smiled at the woman, bending over to whisper in her ear. His fingertips grazed her arm, and I could’ve sworn silver shimmers floated over it.
I blinked several times and rubbed my eyes. The shimmers were no longer there. Eric pointed across the bar to a man sulking by the jukebox. The woman slipped off her chair, smoothing her dress. Eric pressed a finger to her lower back, urging her on and off she went.
He made his way back over to us, keeping his gaze on the newly found couple. The man at the jukebox perked when the woman introduced herself. Eric folded his arms, but I caught his finger pointing at them. The jukebox kicked on, playing These Arms of Mine by Ottis Redding.
“This is one of my favorite songs,” the woman shrieked so loudly we could hear her across the room.
Mine too.
Eric dropped his lips near my ear. “Satisfied?”
My insides folded over themselves, and I froze. “Hardly. That proved nothing. But I can’t deny what you did for two of my clients, so the game is still very, very on.”
Alex eyed Eric as he slid behind the bar, a twinkle in his eye.
“Perfect. Have your first dates here as proof you’re taking part in the deal. I’ll even surprise you with a different drink for each date.”
“You think there’s going to be that many of them?” Alex asked with a snort.
“No.” He gleamed at me. “I know there will be.”
My insides twisted all at the same time, my teeth clenched in anger. I hadn’t mixed emotions like this since the finale of Lost.
“How much do I owe you for that second drink?” I dug out my wallet.
He shook his head. “Don’t worry about it. You’re metaphorically paying me back in spades. Trust me.”
My chest tightened, and I grabbed Alex’s arm. “Let’s go, Alex.”
“See you soon, Elani,” Eric crooned.
I risked a glance over my shoulder. He dragged a hand through his wavy, medium-length hair, tousling it just right. A breath hitched in my throat, and I pushed Alex outside.
She forced me to face her. “Hey. Are you going to tell me what you bet?”
“The algorithm.” I slapped a hand over my face. “If I lose, he gets to alter the code.”
Alex’s face remained blank. Her lip twitched and as she slid a hand over my shoulder, she stared me down. “Then you better win.”
I’d spent most of my adult life searching for my missing half, and now I had only ninety days to find my eternal partner. The exact length as my previous failed attempts. For the love of Zeus.