Chapter 9
Beau’s smirk turned into a smug smile. “Hello, Isolde. Good to see you.”
I straightened my spine. “Hello, Beau.”
“You remember Angela?”
I glanced down at the hand she had wrapped around his arm. The diamond on her finger glittered. “Of course.”
“It’s so wonderful to see you again,” she said, the words kind enough. But they weren’t. We weren’t friends, and never had been. Angela had never been a fan of mine while Beau and I were together—in the few times we interacted at all—and now I knew why. I couldn’t even muster the energy to care. But I felt the eyes in the room turning toward us, hungry for a fight. An altercation. Any kind of gossip at all.
A cloud of sugar wrapped around me. Almost frosting. The softness of that first bite and the moan that came after. Hawk’s arms wrapped around my shoulders and chest, just like he’d done in the foyer earlier. His whole body pressed up against my back, offering me both solidity and heat.
He leaned down and pressed a kiss against my neck, drawing his lips up to my ear. “You okay, baby girl?”
The words were soft enough that only the two of us, Beau, and Angela, could hear. It was a fucking good thing Trinity made me get that bra, because goosebumps raced across my entire body, tightening everything. I couldn’t breathe deep enough to speak, overwhelmed by scent and sensation. When he kissed my hair I closed my eyes and leaned into it. Not because of Beau, but because it was impossible to do anything else.
Beau cleared his throat, and I felt Hawk grin. “Sorry,” he said to Beau and Angela. “Can’t seem to keep my hands off her.”
Beau stared at the two of us, and the look on his face made me want to smile. I held it back. Barely. He was furious. Though why he thought he had any right to be angry was beyond me.
Releasing me just enough to tuck me into his side, Hawk reached out a hand. “Elliot Diaz. My friends call me Hawk.”
For a long second, Beau stared at the hand like it was an alien thing. Or a fish that had washed up on the beach. Finally, he shook Hawk’s hand. “Beau Jefferson. This is my fiancée, Angela.”
“Good to meet you both,” Hawk said. His fingers drew circles on my hip where his hand rested, and fuck it felt like the entire universe had narrowed to that single spot. I didn’t want the dress between my skin and his fingers. I wanted to feel them on me.
“You’re with him?” Angela asked me. I’d been so distracted by Hawk that I hadn’t noticed the shock on her face.
Hawk looked down at me, drawing me into his gaze. True intensity rested there. Dark fire so deep that I questioned everything. Were they really this good? Because the singular attention was doing… something to me, and it was a riptide. Pulling me along so quickly I didn’t have time to swim or breathe. I knew the sensation well.
“She is,” he said softly. “Well, my pack and I. She’s our Omega.”
My stomach tumbled into freefall.
For the briefest second I imagined it being real and pulled back. The vision was too perfect, and it would crack me to want it.
Nope.
No.
They deserved awards for their fucking acting.
But god, I wanted to be someone’s Omega.
“Your pack?” Angela gaped.
Hawk ignored the way she asked, like the idea of me having a pack was so beyond the pale it was ridiculous. “Yep. Over there.”
He nodded back toward the bar, where the other four congregated near the windows. Just like at the airport, they stood out. Mouthwatering eye candy. And since I was paying for the view, I would look at them.
“Well, Hawk,” Beau cleared his throat. “Since—”
“It’s Elliot.”
Beau blinked. “I’m sorry?”
“My name. It’s Elliot.”
I smothered the laughter bubbling up in my chest. A clear line in the sand. His friends called him Hawk, and Beau was not his friend.
“Right.” Beau seemed unsure, and I savored the look of confusion on his face, bitchy as it might be. No one ever stood up to Beau Jefferson. He charmed his way through life and assumed everyone would fall in line. I barely knew anything about the men who were with me, but I already knew they weren’t the type to simply surrender.
“Well, like I was going to say, I’m sure we’ll see a lot of each other in the next couple of weeks, since I’m in the wedding party.”
“You will,” Hawk confirmed. “If you’ll excuse me, Isolde needs a new drink.”
He pulled me with him, walking me back across the party. Now that our backs were to Beau, I let my smile shine through. “That was hysterical.”
“I don’t like the way either of them looked at you.”
I shrugged. “Not unexpected. Just thankful for the rescue.”
Stopping before we reached the group, he turned me to him. “Any time, baby girl.”
My head tilted, disguising the same rolling chills moving over my skin. “Baby girl?”
“Too much?” Hawk’s eyes sparkled.
I didn’t have an answer for that. “Just curious.”
“About?”
My mouth opened and closed. None of the questions flashing in my mind were things I could say out loud in a crowded room, no matter how quietly I asked them.
Hawk leaned in again. “If you’re asking if I like to be called daddy, then the answer is no, not really. But that doesn’t mean I don’t like taking care of someone or giving them exactly what they need. No matter what that is.”
“I don’t need to be taken care of.”
The softest growl. “Don’t you?”
“No.” But my voice held no conviction.
Smiling into my skin, Hawk kissed below my ear. “I don’t believe you.”
“What about you?” I felt dizzy. Somehow I was clinging to the lapels of his jacket despite not remembering reaching for him. “What do you need? Is this something you like? Or just an act for your clients?”
“Mmm.” The low sound vibrated through me. “I don’t think you’re ready to talk about what I need, Isolde.”
“Why not?”
“Because you told us you didn’t want anything to do with us. Or sex. It’s purely the arrangement you want. So we’re here to take care of you and what you need. Don’t worry about us.”
I couldn’t explain why my heart dropped in my chest or why I suddenly felt the bitter tang of disappointment on my tongue.
“I’m… sorry.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
Confusion swirled around me. I didn’t want them to feel like that. They were already so good to me, I didn’t want to feel like an asshole who only cared about herself, no matter if I was paying them to do this.
He straightened just enough to brush a kiss to my temple. My body leaned into him like I wasn’t controlling it. “If you don’t want me to call you baby girl, I won’t, Isolde. I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. Thought I’d give it a try.”
One side of his mouth tipped up, and I caught a single moment of vulnerability in his eyes. There and gone in a flash.
“Remember, this is all about you.”
I reached out and took his hand. “I didn’t say I don’t want it. I— I’m not used to that. I’m not sure how I feel about it. But…”
“But?”
“But,” I swallowed and looked away. “I didn’t hate it.”
“Good to know. Though I’m not sure not hating something is good enough to keep using it.”
I looked up, getting caught in his gaze. “I… don’t stop yet.”
Hawk’s smile slowly deepened, and he pulled me closer by our joined hands, dropping his lips to mine, kissing me far too briefly. “All right,” he paused for another kiss. “Baby girl.”
My stomach tumbled into free fall. Not hating it was the barest truth. Everything in my mind and body loved it.
“Okay, okay,” Vaughn said, stepping into our space. “Stop monopolizing our Omega.”
We both laughed, and Hawk tucked me against his side once more. “Can’t help it. She’s too tempting.”
Vaughn focused on me. “You okay after that?”
“Yeah. I liked watching Elliot hand Beau his own ass on a platter.”
“And I will happily do it as many times as I can over the next three weeks.”
“Likewise,” Vaughn said.
I looked away, embarrassment welling up. “Thank you.”
Rowan’s voice came from my immediate left. “Our pleasure.”
He was fucking quiet for someone so large. I jumped, and his hand smoothed down my spine. “Sorry,” he whispered.
“You’re so quiet.” I laughed. “My mother would like all of us to join family breakfast tomorrow, if that’s okay.”
“Whatever you need.”
The scent of the three of them so close was overwhelming, and I was…
Fuck me. Was I perfuming?
Cade appeared with my glass of wine. But it was new, based on how full it was and the cool condensation gathering on it. Ocean still stood near the windows. I needed to talk about some shit, and my best friends were the only ones I could do it with. “I’m going to talk to Ocean for a bit.”
I didn’t let them answer. As soon as I was out of their sphere, I breathed out a sigh. This was such a bad fucking idea. I was in over my head, and I knew it.
“Hey, O,” I whispered, stepping up beside her. “Feel like going for a walk?”
“God, yes.”
Glancing around, I found Trinity talking to a rapt audience of three men. She smiled, telling some kind of story before she noticed me looking.
“We’re going outside.” I mouthed the words and gestured between Ocean and myself. She nodded.
Ocean still had her drink in her hand, though it didn’t seem like she actually wanted it. We walked down the wide stone steps over to one of the lawns that stretched out. I left my shoes at the edge of the grass, wanting to feel it on my feet.
“How are you?” I asked. “Really.” The answer she’d given me earlier didn’t quite ring true.
“I’m okay.”
“Is that the real answer, or is that the one you think I want to hear?”
She smiled. “It’s real. I’m… fine. Not great, not awful. But I’m just here. I’m glad that you’re back. It’ll be nice to have a second excuse to get out of the house. Not that you’re an excuse.”
“No, I get it.” Other than her greenhouse, where she worked on breeding flowers, her office was in her house. Frankly, it was a miracle her family let her have a business at all, but since it was at home, they supposed she could do something with her time.
“So why are you out here with me instead of inside with them?”
I sighed and tossed back half the wine. Great choice? Probably not. But at this point, I felt like I needed to have my edges softened. Not get so drunk I was sloppy, but my whole spine and body were wound tight around these men. “They’re too much, O.”
“How so?”
“Have you seen them?”
She snickered. “Yes. You’re lucky.”
“Am I?” Confusion swirled through me again. “It was so easy to say I wasn’t going to fall into bed with them. But now that I’m here, they’re so fucking tempting, but I can’t. And then they say things that make me think—” I blew out a breath. “This has been the longest day in the history of the world. It feels like I’ve known them forever and not a few hours.”
“Why can’t you?”
Ocean’s words interrupted my thoughts. I’d been so lost in them I was zoning out. “What?”
“You said you can’t. Why can’t you?”
“What kind of hypocrite would I be if I did that? After what Beau said? I’m not like him. I don’t take advantage of people.”
We had wandered around on the grass in a circle, so I took the last sip of my drink and left the glass next to my shoes. Ocean left hers too.
“Of course you’re not like him. I don’t see why that means you have to hold back.”
“O—”
“No,” she said, her voice uncharacteristically firm. “Beau said what he said because he’s a fucking asshole. What kind of man talks about the woman he’s going to marry like that? He said it to hurt you, and you won’t convince me otherwise.
“This?” She pointed to the house. “Nothing about this is the same. Yeah, you paid them money. But you’re paying them for this. You’re not paying them to clean your house and then asking them to fuck you, Iz.”
“But—” I pressed my hands to my stomach, fighting the swirling anxiety. “I don’t—” It was like I couldn’t get a full sentence out. “It’s only three weeks. What happens when it’s over?”
“Then you had a good time for three weeks with five excruciatingly hot men who treat you better than your ex ever would have. I refuse to see how that’s a bad thing. If it’s the fact that you’re paying them that’s bothering you, I’ll pay for it.”
That made me snort with laughter. “You’re not paying for my escorts.”
“I will if I have to. I have plenty of money, and you know I rarely get to use it. If you need this in order to let go and have some fun, tell me. I’ll send you the cost right now.”
I looked at her. There was no joking or hint of sarcasm on her face. “You’re serious?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
She sighed and crossed her arms. “I told you I’m fine, and I am. But I’m not blind, Iz. You’re not happy. I know what that looks like.”
Going to drag my hands over my face, I stopped just short of ruining my makeup. “They smell so good, O. Like so good. And I swear it feels natural with them. And that’s terrifying.”
“Why?” It was her turn to ask.
“Because look at my track record. Beau asked me out, and within a month, I was…” I shook my head, frustrated at what now felt like the worst kind of naivete. “I was so head over heels for him. And then I spent four years only to be tossed aside. If I fell for him that fast, I can’t know I won’t fall for them, and it’s not even real.”
Ocean smiled. “You know it’s bad when I say the same thing as Trinity. But I think you should. Have some fun. Let yourself loose. There’s nothing wrong with this. And having Beau watch you get treated like a queen while he’s with his knock-off Isolde Barbie is the best revenge I can think of.”
Like I couldn’t help it, I looked back at the house. Hawk watched me from one of the doors, leaning against the frame like he had no cares in the world. “O, the way they look at me feels real. How am I supposed to just let go and pretend we have something and then get over it?”
She shrugged. “So let it be real. You have three weeks. Why the fuck not?”
My mouth opened and closed again. There were about a hundred different reasons I could list about why not. But they were all me. Every reason came down to me. I was scared. I didn’t want to get hurt. I didn’t know if I could handle their acting.
But could I?
All the thoughts which had snuck in today—loving their scents, their kisses, Hawk’s hand on my hip, him calling me ‘baby girl’—I wanted it. Their actions and words felt effortless, and leaning into them felt effortless too.
“I’ll think about it,” I finally said.
“Good.”
I would think about it. But the one thing still stopping me was the deepest fear: what if they showed me exactly how happy I could be?
Because either way, after Ellie’s wedding, I would once again be alone.