Endless abyss of unspoken words (Poetry)

In a year so long,

All the things I've known,

And now I realize they're all wrong,

But life taught me some lessons,

Now that you're gone, I see,

People are just fine without me,

I lost myself in the process,

And yet, I've made some progress,

I decided to change,

I'm no longer the person you've known,

We could say I've grown,

In the end, it doesn't matter what I did,

At times I used to be blind,

So scared to give a piece of my mind,

Now you won't grind me down,

I learned to live without you,

And without everyone else,

Because people always go and leave,

I used to ask why did you leave me,

It's just progress of time,

Till we see how wrong we were,

Sometimes we can be so blind,

It'll all crash down to us,

I tried to save what I could,

I fell from cloud nine,

I realized you're no longer mine,

Everything crumbled apart in my hands

The shatters of my land, what I believed,

It was all gone; for me, justice is none.

All of my dreams broke,

I believed it's all over,

I felt even lower, standing on the rooftop,

As here on the rooftop, I stand,

Suicidal thoughts come to the hand,

So I stand by the side, contemplating suicide.

I can tell no one what I thought,

I can not describe what I fought,

I know no one would and could understand,

Now it all blends,

Why did I let it go this far?

Further, then I had ever known,

Further, then I thought I could,

I lost myself in the process,

What progress have I made?

All the broken promises and lies,

That's what underneath,

You like to show me what's on the surface,

For me, you're now a disgrace.

People show us what's on the outside,

But some like me are too broken inside,

Some things are left to be spoken,

So no one outside can understand.

There are some things to this day,

Which I am unable to say,

If I said to them, would you stay?

The people I knew are no longer,

Because we have all changed,

To the worse and to the better,

And I filled this paper with letters,

Neither of you understands,

But we all go through some hell,

Locked in a cell of our mind,

We became so blind,

Why do we see it all now?

You don't know me, and you never did,

The things I hid deep in my mind,

And found me in an endless loop,

I have been too kind and lost my mind,

Some things are meant to be untold,

Some things were never meant to happen,

Some things just aren't meant to be,

So deal with it on your own,

Until sadness gives you its crown,

Then you'll find yourself on the rooftop,

With broken heart and dreams,

Great pain to overcome,

As all your efforts ended in vain,

The more you overthink,

The more pain you gain,

Sit down and close your eyes,

Before it'll come down to your demise.