Enceladus

2020

I had never felt good enough, never worthy. I felt like I was below average, invisible. To my family and to all of Ohio. If these people knew where I came from and that there was intelligent life on other planets, they’d šĉôt themselves.

Šĉôt. It meant shit in Enceladian. I was from a planet called Enceladus. It was Saturn’s eighth moon of sixty-two. My planet was icy and cold. It was 1,271,542,694 kilometers from Earth--

I had to go to work.

I stepped out of my apartment, into the dry Ohio summer. The heat nearly suffocated me. I lived in Columbus, Ohio. It was lovely, except for the heat.

I had only seen a few states on Earth when I first arrived in 2012. My ship landed me in Washington D.C. and I used the self-destruct so no humans would stumble upon it. I quickly realized that D.C. was where America’s government was located, and I didn’t want to be anywhere near there. So I took a train to Ohio after finding a brochure for the beautiful state.

I hoped to travel more, to another country, maybe Asia seeing as how I took Chinese last year. I needed to move soon though, so my family didn’t find me, but I dreaded it. I had made a life here for the past eight years. It was home, whereas on Enceladus I had never felt welcome.

I was 118 years old, although I looked twenty. People on Enceladus aged and matured far slower than humans. Children on my planet aged from one to fifty years old. Teenagers went from fifty to two hundred. Adults ranged anywhere between two hundred to a millennium. That meant I was technically a teenager. Next to my siblings, I was young. They were three times my age.

I walked down the street to my Prius. The man at the dealership insisted it was best for the environment and practically begged me to buy it. Up until eight years ago, I had never seen a car in person. Cars on Enceladus had become obsolete ages ago. Before I was born. Enceladus was so small that we could get everywhere by walking. Or flying.

I worked at a small coffee shop called Café Brioso downtown, near Ohio State University where I was just about to start a new year as a junior.

“Hey, Amy,” said my coworker, John.

“Hey, morning.”

I put on my uniform and took my spot at one of the registers.

“Can I get an iced vanilla latte?” a customer asked.

“Sure, what size?” I asked in my friendliest voice.

“A small-”

My thoughts were taken to another place. Years ago.

“Amelia, that will not fit you. It’s small. And um . . . you are not,” Cassiopeia said to me. She was my oldest sister. She was tall and gorgeous with white hair and blue eyes.

“It will too fit. I am as small as you,” I protested.

“I think you are too big.” Delphinus snatched the long, sequined blue dress from my hands. “I should wear it.” She spun around, clutching it to her body. Delphinus had ash-white hair and green eyes.

I was fifteen but my sisters were as cruel to me as if I were an adult. They hated me. They were always insulting me and making me feel inferior, as if I wasn’t one of them. As if we didn’t have the same parents (even though they liked to say that we didn’t).

“No, you wear this one.” Cass gave Del a green dress, similar to the blue one. “It matches your eyes.”

“And Amy, you wear this silver one that matches your môn eyes,” Del snickered.

Môn meant devil in Enceladian. My eyes were grey, nearly silver. Devil eyes? Hardly.

A knock sounded on the door. “Girls? Are you ready yet? I bet you all look dashing,” Lynx, our youngest brother called.

We stared down at our slips and the dresses in my sisters’ hands.

“We’ll be ready soon, Lynx!” yelled Cass.

“Hurry, our dearest mother is already down at the ball alone,” Lynx shouted back.

I was pulled out of the memory by the customer ordering the “small” latte. “Sorry. You mean a tall?”

The lady nodded, confused by my blackout. I took her money.

I had vivid flashbacks daily from my life on Enceladus. The flashbacks made me glad I had decided to run away eight years ago.

My eyes were indeed grey. On Earth I wore blue contact lenses. My family always said they were creepy and unnatural. As if magical powers and wings were natural.

I finished my workday and decided to get some new school supplies. Classes started in one week at Ohio State. I was a psychology major. I was extremely interested in the way humans thought. Really, they were pretty blind. They were poisoning their world and they ignored it. I supposed my world wasn’t that better off. We were suffering just as much.

I stopped by an office supply store. I was picking out some pencils when a girl bumped into me.

“Oh! I’m so sorry. I’m ridiculously clumsy,” she said. She had adorable, black-rimmed glasses and short white hair with blue dye staining underneath. She was gorgeous. “I’m Lainie.”

“I’m Amy. Nice to meet you.” I shook her hand. Her eyes were a deep brown. “I love your hair.”

“Thank you,” Lainie said, keeping my stare.

The intense eye contact threw me back into another old memory.

“Ënô rüš!” My mother, Vela, shouted at me. It meant come here. “The men are here for you!”

I was about to meet my future husband, mother kept telling me. It was 1926.

I wanted to strangle the maids after they had stuffed my curves into this awful dress. It wasn’t entirely their fault but I still couldn’t breathe.

I struggled to walk down the stairs. Mother was there with four men, all in tailored suits. Only the best for the Queen’s bastard child.

I grimaced inwardly as I shook each of their hands. But when I got the last one, he wouldn’t touch me.

“Something wrong, sir?” Vela asked politely.

“You promised your prettiest daughter. Not your môn,” the man said. He practically spat at my feet.

My vision blurred with tears. I was young. Only twenty four. Mother said it was time for me to have a husband. I didn’t know how that was fair. I was technically still a child. No parent in their right mind would marry off their child on Enceladus. Caelum was the only one betrothed anyway. Lynx, Cassiopeia and Delphinus weren’t even close to getting married and they were nearly two hundred years older than me. I was sure mother had just wanted to get rid of me.

“Don’t you dare refer to my daughter like that!” Vela warned. “Leave.”

The man stumbled backward at the Queen’s increased volume. “Fine. No one’s going to want that bastard anyway.”

I remembered running to my room, crying. Then, I didn’t know what I wanted. Little did I know that man’s rejection would mean nothing to me in a couple of years.

Now, I knew what I wanted.

Someone was shaking me. I opened my eyes to see the cute Lainie, a breath away.

“Are you alright?” Her breath smelled like spearmint. “You just kind of sat on the ground and didn’t respond to me.”

My back was against a shelf of pens. I was sitting on the ground. Awkward. “Yeah, I’m alright. I just um-I get these dizzy spells. I’m fine, thanks.”

I stood and so did she.

“Maybe I should walk you to your car,” Lainie suggested.

I bit my lip. This was practically the first encounter I’d had with a girl that possibly shared my interests since coming to Earth. Mostly because I didn’t put myself out there. I agreed, bought a pack of pencils and she walked me out to my car.

“You sure you’re okay to drive?” Lainie asked me.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Really. Thank you so much.” I wanted to get her number but didn’t know how to ask. I was way too socially inept.

“Here. Why don’t I give you my number? You can call if you have any other dizzy spells.” She winked.

We exchanged numbers and said our goodbyes. Even after I got home, I couldn’t stop my heart from racing. I didn’t have a lot of experience dating and if this girl was into me then I hoped I didn’t mess it up.