Ember of Hope

Alex is asleep. He looks so peaceful and beautiful like this. His shoulder length auburn hair are messy in his sleep. I brush them away from his face and run my fingers on his features. His straight nose, his perfect lips and long lashes women would kill for. He is so perfect… and he is mine. And I’m about to rob him from his source of happiness. I’m going to take away his memories of our beautiful baby princess. She is asleep in her nursery next door that her father set for her so lovingly. It’ll all be gone. He won’t remember a thing. But I would… I would remember every detail… and I would suffer for him as well as for myself. It’s my curse. I gave him only a month with his precious little bundle of joy as he liked to call her. I’m cruel, heartless… I’m a witch after all. Wherever I go, happiness leaves that place.

Slowly I touched my fingers to his forehead; entering his mind… what I see there, takes my breath away… his memories of me… our daughter… our time together… the way he sees us… the way he is so determined to keep us away from harm. I snatch my hand away. I can’t do this.

But I have to do this. Who else would? What other choice do I have? I have to do this. Slowly, I put my trembling fingers back on his forehead. This time I ignore his memories… if I don’t look; they won’t affect me. Or so I thought before blocking them away in the far recesses of his mind… a place he won’t ever find them again. When he wakes up it will be just him and me now.

I go to the nursery and it is not difficult for me to change the outlook of this cute little room… my daughter’s little world… and then I take her in my arms for Alex. I kiss her face for him. She has his hair, his straight nose and beautiful lips. She has my eyes though… but hers are such a beautiful green they take my breath away every time I look at them. But she is asleep right now so I can’t look at them. On one hand I wish she opens her beautiful eyes for me to see them in these last moments that she’s mine. On the other, I dread to look in her eyes and give her away.

I steel myself, averting my gaze from her face, and take her to hand her over to her new parents who I’m sure will love her very much.

And this is when I lose a piece of my heart – darkening my already black heart further. Damning my soul for eternity.

…………………………………………………

We are like gypsies – moving places every few years… not laying down roots. We couldn’t stay in one place for long and call it home. I feared my sisters would locate us. Alex wasn’t happy with this constant fear I had to live with but he respected my wishes even though he kept reminding me that he could keep us safe. I just wasn’t prepared to put our peace in jeopardy besides I never wanted to put him at the mercy of my whole coven if I could help it.

I’d done enough evil to the poor man already. If he knew what I’d done to him, he’d probably burry me alive. So once again we were preparing to leave our life in Texas behind to lay new roots in a small town near New York City. It was a beautiful place – peaceful and quiet… just what we wanted. I’d accepted a job at the local hospital and I was hopeful for our new journey.

…………………………

“Alex?” a voice called behind Alexander while he was walking back to his house after his morning jog. He turned to look for the woman who’d called her name. And froze. Because standing in front of him was none other than Tamara; his best friend’s wife. Seeing her brought a pang of hurt to his heart – a longing for home.

“Tamara” he whispered her name. She was looking at him wide eyed, her eyes full of shock. She looked like she was as speechless as him. If she was here, that meant Chris would be here too. “What are you doing here? Why aren’t you home?”

But it was as if she wasn’t listening “you’re alive. How?” she asked slowly.

“What do you mean how? I’m just alive”.

“Alex you died. How are you alive?”

“What? What are you talking about?”

“I... I don’t... I don’t get it. Come to my house with me and tell me everything. Alex this is unbelievable... you being alive”.

“Sure. But I still have no idea what you’re talking about”.

“Come. We’ll talk”.

Alex opened the passenger door to her car and helped himself in. Nobody talked the whole drive to her house. Both trying to digest what the other was implying.

“Come on in”. And he went, following her inside. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be right back”. He sat on a couch looking around at the place which looked well lived, not a place someone visits to spend a holiday. That was strange, but he waited for her to tell him all about home first. He was dying to know about Chris.

Tamara came with a bottle of wine and two glasses in her hands. She sat in front of him placing the glasses for them both; she poured for him first.

“Now tell me how are you here? And if you were alive this whole time, why did you never come back home?” she asked calmly.

“How could I come back Tamara? If you don’t remember they exiled me. After all I did for Evreux they couldn’t accept my mate just because she was a witch? I get people aren’t comfortable with witches. I understand. But to exile me? It was too much. I long for my home with each breath I take, but I couldn’t come back. Wait, they exiled you too? I thought they’d accepted you after your oath of never using magic again”.

“Alex, what in the name of God are you talking about? What happened to you? You don’t remember anything? Your kidnapping, the curse, the war, and then you fell ill... you DIED Alex. We burned you and buried you. We mourned you. People of Evreux still do. Chris is the Steward of Evreux; even though people named him king after your dying wish but he refuses to take your title. Oh if only he knew you’re alive. My God I can’t believe my eyes Alex”.

“Tamara for God’s sake, you’re not making any sense to me. This is not what happened according to my memory”.

“Memory” she mumbled to herself “of course”.

“What?”

“Let me show you my memories. You’ll know what I’m talking about”.

“You can do that?” he asked in wonder.

“A witch, remember?”

She got up from her seat and came to sit directly next to him. She lifted her hand hovering it near his head “may I?”

“Yeah sure” he said a little weirded out.

She touched his forehead with her palm and her eyes closed. Warmth started trickling out of her palm and into his forehead. It was a weird sensation but he sat still.

Suddenly images started forming in his head that were not his own... Tamara’s memories. He saw everything then... their return from the war... panicked dragons bound in that form... his body lying on his bed, all frail and fragile... the pyre built high to burn his dead body; people weeping around it in a huge circle – despair and grief clear on their faces.

He got up so fast Tamara was left blinking her eyes. “Alex wait” she called after him but he was long gone.

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