Dirty Letters

“Check. One, two, three. One, two, three.” Griffin had on a set of headphones and leaned into the microphone to speak. I heard some other people talking in the background, but the camera had been set up inside the little recording booth, so the only thing I saw on the big monitor was Griffin’s face. Which was fine by me. Honestly, I’d wanted to spend some time staring at him since he knocked on the camper door. This was the perfect opportunity to gawk without him catching me.

For the next fifteen minutes, Griffin went through a bunch of sound system checks and testing. He stood in the booth repeating words and talking to people. My eyes were glued to the monitor, combing over every inch of his handsome face. He was seriously even more gorgeous than I could have imagined. He had big, beautiful brown eyes with thick, dark lashes lining his lids that almost made it look like he had eyeliner on. His skin was tanned to a light shade of golden brown and his masculine jaw had day-old stubble on it. I really, really liked the stubble. Just as I was staring, Griffin looked directly at the camera, and his voice dropped low. “Guys, this message is for my girl, so close your ears.” He flashed a sexy, crooked smile and then whispered into the microphone. “Babe—I forgot to tell you, I left you a little something in the center console in case the mood strikes while you’re watching today.”

My belly fluttered. The man was as sweet as he was sexy. Although it was a dangerous combination that seemed to turn my brain into mush. I had to tear myself away from watching the monitor to go to the center console. When I opened it, I started to crack up.

Okay, so he was sweet and sexy and a pervert. The crazy man had left me a vibrating Furby key chain. Lord knows how many of these things he actually bought.

Smiling like a goofball, I climbed back into the rear of the RV carrying my makeshift vibrator. But I froze hearing Griffin start to sing.

Oh my God. His voice is amazing.

I knelt on the floor right in front of the monitor, completely entranced at his gritty, soulful voice. Griffin was singing a ballad of some sort, and I felt every word of the song inside my chest in the most overwhelming way. When the song ended, he opened his eyes, and I realized I’d been holding my breath the entire time.

I inhaled a few lungfuls of air and let out controlled exhales in an effort to slow down my racing heart.

God, I was totally screwed.

Totally screwed when it came to this man.

I shook my head and looked down at the furry stuffed animal still clutched in my hand. “What are we going to do, Mee-Mee? This man is going to break our hearts.”

Mee-Mee had no answers, so I folded the key chain back into the palm of my hand and shut my eyes. “I’m definitely going to be needing you later.”

“So . . . what did you think?” Griffin opened the door and climbed into the back of the RV, where I was still sitting on the couch. He’d spent about three hours singing, and I’d spent the same amount of time glued to the monitor. It had been an amazing and surprisingly intimate experience—he’d talk to me between takes, and at the end of each song he’d flash his boyish smile at the camera or give me a wink.

“I think I’m a groupie.”

He closed the distance between us, taking a seat on the couch next to me. “Oh yeah? You want to play groupie and rock star?” He tugged me up from my seat and guided me to straddle his lap.

I nodded, wrapping my arms around his neck. “Do I get to take off my panties and throw them at your feet?”

Griffin’s eyes darkened. “You take off your panties, and I’ll kiss your feet.”

I giggled and pressed my forehead to his. “Seriously, Griff. That was absolutely incredible. Your voice is just beautiful. I don’t even know what to say. It’s like you sing from your heart. I could feel so many emotions in your words. I loved every minute of today, but that song you sang at the end—the one about heaven needing her more than you—that song just made me melt. I actually cried a little listening.”

“I wrote that for my mother.”

I nodded. “I figured you did. I know I never knew her personally, but I’m certain she’s listening and as proud of you as I am.”

Griffin leaned in and kissed my lips tenderly. “That means a lot to me. Thank you.”

A knock came from behind me. Someone was at the camper door. I went to climb off Griffin’s lap, but he held me in place. “Stay. It’s probably Aiden.”

“Boss?” a voice called through the closed door.

Griffin yelled around me. “Are we all set?”

“The car will be there at six.”

“Sweet. Thanks for taking care of everything.”

“Text me if you need anything else.”

“See you tomorrow, Aiden.”

I looked at Griffin. “That was rude. You just had an entire conversation behind a closed door.”

Griffin smirked. “Babe. Scooch your ass toward me a little.”

My brows drew together, so Griffin nudged me a bit, pulling me farther down his lap until I felt warmth between my legs. And something hard. He saw the knit of my brows lift to understanding.

“More polite to talk behind a closed door than with my hard-on trying to escape from my pants, don’t you think, sweetheart?”

Sweetheart.

I really liked that name, too.

I also really liked the way our bodies were aligned. So I leaned in and kissed him, grinding down on his erection as I threaded my hands into his hair. God, I wanted to feel him inside me so badly it hurt. Griff’s fingers dug into my ass and he started to guide me to rock back and forth on him. We both had on jeans, but the friction between us made the heat rise to an incendiary level. I seriously thought I might be able to come from just our dry humping.

But . . . it wasn’t my turn. As much as I was terrified to connect with Griffin and get hurt, I didn’t want to be selfish, either. I broke our kiss and nuzzled his ear. “Did you lock the door behind you?”

He blew out his frustrated answer. “I didn’t.”

I debated getting up and latching the door shut, but I really didn’t want to cool the moment. So I threw caution to the wind and whispered back, “Well then, if anyone comes in, I guess they’ll be getting a good show.”

I started to kiss down his neck. When I slipped my hands between us and began to unbuckle Griffin’s belt, he groaned. “Fuck.” His head fell back against the couch, and the desire in his voice fueled me. I wanted to make him feel desperate, as desperate as he’d made me.

Grabbing the hem of his shirt, I dipped my head and licked my way from his chest down to his taut abs. I could have spent all day tracing the sculpted lines of his muscles, but I had more pressing things to get to. Sitting up again, I leaned back and unbuttoned his jeans. The sound of each tooth separating as I dragged the zipper down filled the air around us.

Griffin watched me as I lifted from his lap and knelt on the floor in front of him. Yanking at the waist of his pants, I slid them down his thighs. The thick bulge that greeted me from his tight boxer briefs heightened my arousal, and I unconsciously licked my lips.

“Fuck, Luca,” he groaned. “That mouth. That fucking mouth.”

It was seriously a toss-up who wanted this more. I couldn’t wait to make him feel good. The two of us grabbed for his boxers at the same time, both pushing them down in haste. Griffin’s erection sprang loose and my mouth salivated. Oh my.

Of course he had to be that big. As if his gorgeous face, flawless body, and sexy voice weren’t enough—God seriously pulled out all His tricks when He made this man.

Leaning up on my knees, I wrapped my hands around the thick girth of him and looked up before lowering my head.

Griffin’s voice was strained when he spoke. “You’re so beautiful right now.”

I smiled and, without a word, wrapped my hand around the base and took him into my mouth—our eyes staying locked the entire time.

“Jesus Christ.”

I bobbed up and down a few times, finding my rhythm, and fluttered my tongue along the underside of his crown. Griffin groaned and fisted handfuls of my hair. I loved how his lust made him grow rougher. His bound hands guided my head down farther and then tugged to make me rise again. I’d started this, but he was definitely taking over control. “Fuck. Just like that. That feels so good.”

Griffin lifted his hips and began to pump into my mouth. I was so turned on that I was certain if I reached down and touched myself for even two seconds, I’d set myself off.

“Luca . . .” Griff gave my hair a slight tug—a warning. But I fought against it and kept going.

He spoke louder, likely thinking I hadn’t heard him the first time. “Babe. I’m gonna come.”

I lifted my eyes to meet his, letting him know that I’d definitely heard him, and then sucked him as deep as I possibly could.

“Fuck . . .”

Griffin gripped my hair even harder and pumped twice more before stilling my head. His entire body shook as the heat of his orgasm spurted into my throat.

After, his chest heaved up and down. I was the one performing neck aerobics with a full mouth, yet he was panting like he’d just run a marathon. Griffin released my hair and struggled to catch his breath. “Jesus, Luca. You’re really fucking good at that.”

I felt gratified at his praise. “I told you, the For Dummies series of porn.”

He laughed. “What else do they have? I’m ordering every movie they ever produced as soon as I get the strength to lift my arms and take out my phone.”

I got up from the floor and snuggled up against Griffin’s side. “Pretty sure they had Anal for Dummies, Sixty-Nine for Dummies, and Ménage à Trois for Dummies, too. But I only watched the one.”

“I’ll be buying the first two but not the Ménage one. Not sharing you, babe.”

Warmth spread through me, but then a thought hit me and a chill pushed back whatever comfort I’d started to enjoy. Groupie and rock star. This was the life that Griffin led. I was certain he had a line of women who would do what I’d just done for him after every performance. They probably believed he was singing to them, too.

I’d gone quiet and Griffin noticed. He stroked my hair. “What’s going on in that head of yours, babe?”

“Nothing.”

He pulled up his jeans and boxers and turned to look at me. “Talk to me, Luca. What just happened? We were good, and then we weren’t.”

I shook my head and looked down. “Sorry. It’s stupid.”

Griffin tilted my chin to look up at him. “Spill it, Vinetti.”

I sighed. “I guess . . . well . . . you said you weren’t sharing me, and I was just thinking you must have dozens of women ready to drop to their knees after a concert. Or at the snap of your fingers, even.”

Griffin held my eyes. “I wish I could make you feel better by telling you that I don’t. But I’m not going to lie to you. There definitely is opportunity. But that doesn’t mean I want to take it. I know you just got here, and our situation is a little unique, but I wasn’t kidding when I said you were my girl. You are my girl, Luca. And you know what? That’s probably not the most convenient thing for either one of us, considering our circumstances. But that doesn’t change how I feel. I haven’t been with another woman in almost two months—since you answered my first letter again. Just because I might have women willing doesn’t mean I’m willing. You’re my girl, Luca. We’re going to figure this shit out.”

My eyes started to water. I wanted to have his optimism and courage, but I was terrified. Griffin had been honest with me, so I did the same. “I’m scared to be your girl.”

He smiled sadly and cupped my cheek. “It’s okay. I know you, Luca. Being scared only lasts for a little while, then you do something brave. We’re not in a rush. We’ve waited so many years already. What’s a little longer?”

I turned my head into his hand and kissed his palm. “Thank you, Griffin.”

He kissed my forehead and kept his lips pressed against me. I felt his smile grow against my skin. “Pretty sure I should be thanking you after what just went down.”